A/N: This ended up WAY longer than I expected, so I ended up splitting it into two parts! This part is a prelude of sorts, and I still have no idea how long the rest will be, I'll try to have it done soon as possible though

"CHEERS!"

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Usopp smashed his mug against those of his crewmate's, laughing even as some of the contents splashed onto his hand. Tonight was gonna be great, he could tell already! They had a lot to celebrate, after all!

In the span of a week, not only had they reunited, but they'd also rescued Fishman Island and entered the New World! It had been scary, dangerous, not to mention completely insane, but looking at the laughing faces of his friends, he couldn't help the feeling of contentment that swept over him.

"To us," Nami said, raising her mug once more with a grin.

"To us," Zoro repeated with a toothy smirk.

Again, they slammed their mugs together, this time with enough gusto to draw in several irritated glares from other people situated in the pub. He refused to let that faze him, ignoring them in favor of knocking back his drink. The alcohol warmed his throat all the way down, settling comfortably in his stomach, and he released a shoulder-slumping sigh. Yeah, there was absolutely nothing that could ruin the Great Captain Usopp's mood tonight!

Nothing!

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(Oh, how he'd regret those words.)

When Usopp woke up, it was to a raging headache. Actually, his whole body ached. Felt like he'd been suckered punched by Luffy, except, all over.

Reminded him of the time they'd dueled back in Water Se—on second thought, he didn't want to think about that. Guess it could be worse. This time he wasn't sprawled on a rocky surface, at least. No, the icy tiles beneath him were doing wonders for...

Wait. What? Usopp popped his eyes open. Icy tiles?

Groping around until he could get a decent grip, he pushed himself upright, and not to brag or anything, he only groaned a little.

"What the...?"

He was crouching in the center of what appeared to be a storage room. Maybe. Honestly, the place was such a wreck he couldn't be sure what it's initial purpose had been. The only reason he'd guessed storage, was because of the assortment of boxes and random items scattered across the floor. Looked like a hurricane had blown through.

Frowning, he hoisted himself up using the nearest shelf, leaning his shoulder against it and drawing in a mouthful of air as the world tilted a bit. It was then he heard another groan.

Craning his neck, which gave a sharp stab in response, he located a figure near the back, curled into a ball with their arms coiled around several bags of rice and canned foods.

"..Sanji?"

Said crewmate grunted, the skin between his eyes crinkling in what may have been annoyance. He was out cold, by the looks of it.

Sighing, Usopp picked his way over, trying not to step on anything, failing and nearly receiving a faceful of floor as a result.

"Oi, Sanji!" Usopp stooped beside him, giving his shoulder a firm shake. "Wake up already!"

A grunt and a hand swatted at him feebly, as if trying to chase away a fly.

Scowling, he backed away. All right. Time for plan B.

Tucking his arms over his chest, he began a slow walk to the door. "All right, if you wanna lay there all day, who am I to stop you? I'll just have to tell that beautiful lady who showed up asking about you that you're not available right now."

One step, two steps, three, four.

"...Beautiful?"

Usopp wasn't sure whether to laugh or sigh. Honestly, Sanji was his friend and all, but he could be dumb as Luffy sometimes.

"Wait—what the—Usopp, where the hell are we?" A pause, "And why the hell do I feel like I've gone five rounds against Luffy!?"

Ah. Right.

Smile dissipating, he made his way to Sanji. "Don't know. I just woke up here. Actually, I was hoping you did, but..."

Sanji blinked, and a frown that bordered thoughtful curved his lips. Then he winced and ground the heel of his palm into his forehead. "Hell... Can't remember. Shit. Feels like I took a metal bat to the head."

Usopp cringed at his choice of words. "Ah, anyways, we should look for Luffy and the others, don't you think?"

At that, Sanji's mood did a whopping three-sixty, and he sprung to his feet, flames licking at the soles of his shoes. "That's right! My dear Nami-swan and Robin-chwan must be worried sick over me! Fear, not my loves, your prince is on his way!" He tossed the last bit over his shoulder as he raced for the door, slinging it open and... slamming it shut? What the—?

"Usopp." Sanji said, voice low.

"Y-Yes?"

Slowly, the cook turned to meet his gaze, visible eye round as a dinner plate. "There's a tiger."

"Huh?" No, no way! He must've misheard! "What'd you say?"

Sanji backed away, finally releasing the doorknob in favor of jabbing a finger at the door. "Out there. Tiger."

"Noooo," Usopp gave a huff of a laugh, clearing the space between them in a confident stride. "You must've imagined it. The sun playing tricks on your eyes, and whatnot," As Usopp said the last part, he yanked the door open, gesturing to the space outside despite Sanji frantically shaking his head. "See? There's no way there's a—"

"ROOOAAARRRRRR!"

Usopp slammed the door shut.

"Oh. My. God."

"Told you," Sanji grunted, digging into his pocket for a cigarette if he had to guess.

"You know, you should really stop smoking so much, Chopper showed me this medical textbook, and—OH, GOD THERE'S A FREAKING TIGER!"

Sanji nodded, stuffing a cigarette between his teeth. "Yeah."

"A TIGER!"

"Looks that way."

"How did it—what—why—it's gonna eat us!" Usopp crumpled to his knees, the last bit a whimper. "Save me."

Sanji sighed, using the smoke from his cigarette to really sell his point. "Get a hold of yourself, Usopp. There's a door between us, see? 'Sides, I heard if you play dead—"

"That's for bears, jackass!"

Sanji broke off, pinning Usopp with an annoyed scowl. "Fine, fight it is, then. I'll yank the door open on the count of three. Ready?"

"Huh!? Ah, uh, w-wait a minute!" Usopp scrambled to his feet, digging through his pouch until he'd located his Kabuto. "O-Okay!" He moved away until a good twenty feet were between him and the door. "R-Ready!"

Sanji elected to ignore that tiny detail, instead, nodding and proceeding to grab the knob. "One. Two."

Usopp swallowed, leveling his Kabuto with the door.

"Three!"

Sanji yanked it open, rushing forward, leg readied for a kick. Usopp was right behind him, in a manner of speaking, drawing the band of his slingshot back and firing. An achingly familiar shriek followed.

"AAAAAAAAAAACK!"

"Uh."

"Chopper!?"

Yeah, there was no mistaking it. That was Chopper, all right. He stood in front of the door, shaking like a leaf, a gaping hole in the counter where his head had been and a foot inches from sending him through the wall.

"Ah. Ah. Ahhhh." He fell over, limbs moving as though he'd turned to stone.

Usopp lowered his Kabuto, wasting no time hurrying to his friend's side. "Oi, Chopper! You all right!?"

"Well," Sanji said, "Shit."

That was one way to put it. Not only was the poor reindeer scared stiff, but for some reason or another, his clothes were covered in... something, and a collection of flower necklaces were tangled in his antlers. Seriously, though, what the hell was that stuff? It smelled like tabasco sauce.

"Ah. Ah. Ah." Chopper twitched, then, he shot upright, nearly ramming an antler through Usopp's eye. "AH!"

With much thanks to his training, Usopp jerked back not a second too late, tumbling onto the floor. "Hey! Watch it!"

Chopper's panicked gaze snapped from side to side, before settling on him and shifting into a sheepish grin. "Oh, uh, sorry!"

"Geez," Usopp huffed, shifting so that his legs were sprawled in front of him.

Sanji stared, jaw having dropped, cigarette falling.

Oh, come on, he knew that had been a close call, but it hadn't been that—

A shadow covered him.

—bad.

Usopp gulped.

A low rumble sounded behind him, and with a pang of dread, he craned his neck, locking eyes with the fully grown tiger looming over his shoulder.

"U-U-Uh, n-nice kitty?" He squeezed out of his tightening throat. "G-Good kit—"

"GROOOAAR!"

"EEEEEK!"

Sanji, to his credit, snapped out of his shock rather quickly, "Usopp, duck!"

Usopp had no qualms with that considering he'd already fallen over, darkness bordering on the edges of his vision. He could just catch a glimpse of Sanji rushing forward, leg raising, only to have Chopper... jump in front of him?

"Wait!" He yelped, hooves held in front of him as though to construct a barrier.

Sanji skidded to a hasty stop, teeth ground in the beginnings of a frustrated snarl. "Chopper, I don't know what the hell you—"

"He's friendly!" Chopper cut in, wide eyes glancing the hulking tiger over.

Now that he mentioned it, Usopp was noticing an utter lack of claws ripping him apart. That didn't mean anything, though! Usopp shoved himself to his hands and knees, crawling to the safety that was one of their crews strongest fighters.

"Chopper," The cook bit out, "Explain."

"W-Well," Chopper gave the tiger another once over before lowering his hooves, "Y-You see, I actually don't know why. I just woke up here a minute ago."

The tiger gave a low rumble, stalking closer and sitting at Chopper's side.

Okay. That was weird. And scary.

"O-Oh, is that so?" Chopper stammered, a startled frown curving his mouth. "Well, if you say so... O-Oh, right! He said," He cleared his throat, then donning a much deeper voice, "'Greetings, humans, my name is General Reeds, me and my men owe this blond warrior a hefty debt and have vowed to serve him 'til our dying breaths, so be it.'"

Said blond blinked, "Huh?"

"W-Wait, what?" Usopp spluttered. Then he realized, "Woah, wait a second, hold on, what does he mean by 'his men!?'"

The answer to his question came not a moment later, a stream of animals crawling from every nook and cranny the small dining parlor had to offer. Squirrels perched on the countertop, hawks gripped onto the tips of chairs while several wolves and foxes formed a circle around them.

Usopp was not liking this. No. Not one bit.

"If you're 'friendly,'" Sanji said the word 'friendly' the same way he'd say 'mosshead' or 'algae-for-brains.' "Then tell me why the hell you growled at us!"

The tiger swiped a paw over his chipped ear in way that seemed almost sheepish, then released another low rumble.

For a minute, Chopper simply stared up at them with expectant eyes. They returned it flatly until a spark of recognition flitted into the reindeer's expression, and he proceeded to translate. "A-Ah, he said, 'our beloved leader deserves nothing less than the most enthusiastic of greetings.'"

Usopp had never been more lost in his entire life. Thankfully, Sanji seemed equally flustered, considering the way he was blindly digging for his cigarette carton. Chopper looked between them, frown deepening.

"Um, S-Sanji... what did you..?"

"Dunno," He answered without missing a beat, "Don't remember anything. Shit."

The tiger gave a deep bow, or at least, that's what he figured the head tip was. This time, it only took a heartbeat for Chopper to translate.

"'He saved my army from the great destroyer of mountains,'"

Many of the animals gave joyful cries at that, the hawks flapping their wings, the wolves throwing their snouts up and howling.

"'We'll never forget the debt we owe you!'"

Silence.

Usopp jumped at the opening to sift through his memory. He thought back, absolutely certain he'd recall a 'great destroyer of mountains,' but all he got were vague images of stumbling through a darkened forest.

He crossed his arms. Weird.

Searching farther, he grasped onto drinking, the feeling of alcohol dribbling down his chin, the table steadily growing blurrier and blurrier until his mind drew a blank. But, that didn't make sense! He hadn't had that much to drink! Just the one!

He was on the verge of tugging his hair out in frustration when it hit him.

"Oh."

Sanji and Chopper's eyes snapped to him. Usopp offered them a shaky smile, before using the counter to hoist himself upright.

"U-Um, if you will, g-great, powerful, wonderful General Reeds, I, Captain Usopp would like a moment to discuss things with my... er, men—no, comrades."

A heartbeat passed, two, three, all the while the tiger's gaze bore into him. Then, right as he was beginning to think it would maul him after all, the large cat gave a curt nod and stalked to the other side of the counter, his army at his heels.

When the animals were out of earshot, Usopp inched closer, signaling for them to huddle around him.

"Sanji," He hissed, "You said you don't remember anything, right!?"

Sanji's frown deepened, "No. Not a damn thing."

"Chopper,"

The reindeer jumped a little at his name.

"You don't remember anything either, do you? Like how you got all that stuff on you?"

"N-No..." He admitted with a sheepish glance at the state of his clothes. "Not a thing."

Groaning, Usopp dragged his hands down his face. "Guys," He said, "I think we got drugged."

Chopper's jaw practically hit the floor, while Sanji bit his cigarette in half, the tip bouncing off his shoe.

"D-D-Drugged!" Chopper squawked, in a tone far too loud for Usopp's liking. He tried shushing him, but the reindeer was too busy running around in a panic to notice. "Oh no! Various drugs can have harmful side-effects such as dehydration, hallucinations and extreme fatigue!" He skidded to a halt long enough to check his pulse, then his hooves raced to his temples. "I need to run over the symptoms! Headache, check. Dizziness, check. Soreness—"

"Check." Usopp and Sanji droned.

"Ah! This is bad!" Chopper cried, then he seemed to remember something, and his eyes widened in horror. "Wait, where is everyone else at!?"

In synch, Usopp and Sanji shrugged.

"What if they're passed out somewhere hurt!? Or, or, what if someone kidnapped them!?"

Usopp shuffled his feet, dread seeping down his spine. "Y-You don't think—?"

The familiar scent of something burning reached his nose, and he cut himself off in favor of shuffling backward. Chopper mimicked the sentiment, obviously not fancying the idea of being filleted any more than he did.

"Fucking bastard," Sanji rumbled, both legs bursting into flames that danced up his torso, "If anyone even so much as dared to lay a hand on Nami-swan or Robin-chwan..." He spun on his heel, likely about to tear his way outside, then into whatever poor idiot that'd deemed drugging the Strawhat Pirate's a good idea.

Usopp must've lost his freaking mind during his training with Heracles, because he actually grabbed Sanji's shoulder, and slid in front of him.

"Woah, woah, hold on a sec', Sanji!"

Sanji's glare sharpened into something that would likely haunt his dreams for the next month or so. "Usopp, if you don't get the hell out of my way this instant—"

"I've got a better idea!" He interceded, surprising himself with how steady his voice came out. Yup. Definitely, must've lost his mind.

Sanji didn't seem elated by the idea, though he quit struggling. "Explain."

"W-Well," Usopp glanced at the legion of animals.

Most of them had noticed the exchange and were watching with curious eyes.

He lowered his tone several octaves. "They think you're their leader or something, right? Why not have them search the area?"

A blink, then a grin almost as terrifying as Zoro's before a battle split the cook's face. "Ah. I see what you mean. Good thinking, Usopp."

"W-Well, I guess I am pretty great, aren't I?" Usopp chuckled. His glee was short-lived, however, as Sanji threw an arm around his neck and dragged him to the center of the parlor.

"Attention!"

The animals wasted no time gathering in a neat line in front of them, while the General tiger sauntered over, lazily taking his seat on Sanji's other side.

Nodding in satisfaction, Sanji lit a cigarette, taking a drag in that way he did when he was trying to be serious.

"All right, listen up, you walking chunks of sirloin and steaks—"

Usopp gave his ankle a sharp kick for that. Sanji didn't bat an eyelash.

"—you said something about me being your savior or whatever, right? Well, here's your chance to pay me back. Usopp. Bounty Posters."

"Ah, uh, r-right." Ducking out of the cook's grasp, Usopp dug through his pouch until his fingers had brushed against the rough surface of paper. "Here!"

Sanji took them, crouching and placing two on the floor.

Usopp gaped at Nami and Robin's pictures, then at the rest still rolled up in his fist. Honestly, he should've expected that.

"I want these two found in no less than an hour! If even a hair on their perfect heads is harmed, I'll personally ensure—"

"What he means to say," Usopp interceded, forcing his lips into a shaky smile. "Is that these two are friends of ours! Very good friends! A lot of stuff happened last night, you see, and in the confusion, we lost track of them! You guys wouldn't mind helping us search, would you?"

Several squawks and barks followed.

"Uh," Chopper inched closer, hooves rubbing together in an anxious gesture. "T-They said, 'silence you long-nosed ape, t-the... leader is speaking...'"

Usopp took a moment to process that. "LONG-NOSED WHA—"

Sanji made a point to clear his throat, "As I was saying, if even a hair on my beautiful princesses heads is harmed, I'll personally ensure every one of you is turned into a savory broth and fed to them as a snack. Capiche?"

At that, loud howls and roars filled the room, though they seemed more pumped than angry.

"They said, 'YES LEADER!'" Chopper supplied, a tad too eager.

On that note, the General stood up, stalking to the bounty posters, and giving an earsplitting roar Chopper quickly translated.

"'Enough tomfoolery men I want eyes in the sky immediately!'"

Usopp took advantage of the diversion to slink off to the side. A cyborg, a talking skeleton, now an army of animals pledging their undying loyalty to Sanji. Such is the life of a Strawhat Pirate. His head bobbed in tune. No point questioning it anymore.

"Usopp," Chopper called, "Come on!"

Usopp stared dumbly at the Parlor, already nearing empty. Chopper and Sanji had paused by the exit, the latter pinning him with a scowl that was anything but friendly.

Huh. They really didn't waste any time, did they?

"Get your ass over here," Sanji said, voice oddly monotone. "We're leaving."

"Ah, I'm coming! Wait a second!"

He practically tripped over himself hurrying to them, and Sanji pushed the door open, allowing the remaining animals to dart passed their legs, the birds vanishing into the sky, the chipmunks and other land animals heading for every corner and alleyway in sight.

Don't question it, he reminded himself. This is perfectly normal for us.

Something warm rammed into the center of his back, sending him staggering a couple paces forward.

"Hey! Watch it!" He yelped, whirling around only to find himself glaring down none other than the General tiger.

Chopper cleared his throat as the General gave a small rumble.

"'Straighten your spine, nimrod! Your posture is worse than a half-drowned rabbit!'"

Usopp's mouth fell open, a tick settling in his left eye. Don't question it. Don't do it. Don't even go ther—

"WHAT THE HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL!"

Darnit.