After Chloe and Aubrey had left Beca was alone with her thoughts. And then she realised two things. She was still alive because her girls once again came to her rescue. And she needed to talk to her father.
She needed to be honest with her father. And it was time to tell him what happened to her since the day he left. He always had tried to make things work with her. But she never gave him the chance. Lying in her hospital bed she realised her life could have been totally different if she had opened her mouth earlier to him.
She knew the talk with her father would be hard. It was going to be the hardest conversation she ever had. But she had to do it. And she was going to do it today. So she grabbed her phone and texted him, ask him to come. His reply came immediatly.
She had an half hour before her dad would be there and she was nervous as hell for their talk. But she knew she had to do it, and there was no way back.
To kill the time she made a new mix. It was a mix for all her girls. To show them how much she cared for those awesome nerds. And to let them know how grateful she was that they saved her life. She just finished and saved her mix, when her father entered her room.
He stood in the doorway looking at her and suddenly she was at a loss of words. They just looked at each other for a moment. Neither of them said anything. He then closed the door and walked over to her. He gave her a kiss and sat down in the chair next to her.
"How are you Bec" he asked her softly.
"It could be better, but I'm glad I'm still alive" she answered truthfully.
"I'm glad you texted me. I was so worried about you. I will never forget the call I got from Aubrey. Telling me that you were in the hospital. And then the doctor telling me how bad your condition was, and that you were pregnant. And then that you lost the baby" he said.
"I know. And I'm sorry dad. I should've told you that. And I'm sorry that I didn't want to see you sooner" she said with guilt.
"I'm glad you changed your mind and still want to talk to your old man" he said.
"Yeah, that's why I texted you. I owe you an explanation."
"I guess you do. I don't understand anything of what happened. Your mom that showed up. And apparently she lost it completely" he said.
"Yeah about that. I need to tell you something. And I ask you to let me finish before you ask any questions" she said.
"Okay, go ahead" he said.
"Well mom didn't suddenly loose it completely. It wasn't the first time she was violent towards me" she started her story without looking at her father.
"It happened shortly after you got divorced. She couldn't handle that you left us. And then she started to drink and use drugs. But I was only eight years at the time and didn't understand what was happening. First she started to blame you for everything that went wrong. She started to drink more and more. And then she got involved with all kinds of men. And they weren't the type of men you want around your kids. She started to get agressive, and started to beat me. Her many boyfriends hit me to" she said.
She needed a moment to take a breath before continuing her story.
"One of her boyfriends was worser than everything I already had endured. He molested me. It started with touching me in inappropriate places and it ended in raping me. And during one of those times mom and Roman came in. And instead of stopping that she encouraged him to go on. And encouraged Roman to do the same thing. I won't go in details, but that was the beginning of the end. Eventually she broke up with that guy. And I prayed so many times that things would go better. I prayed to God and promised to be a good girl. I begged that you would come and get me out of there. But it never happened."
She paused for a second to wipe away her tears. She still didn't dare to look at her father.
"I hoped things would go better but they didn't. The guy was gone, but Roman was turned into a monster by her and her fucked up boyfriends. He continued with the things that guy started. And when I was fifteen I found out I was pregnant. Roman was the father. And when mom found out she was furious. Not at Roman, but at me. She called me a slut and many other things. Eventually she performed an abortion on me. She left me bleeding for two days. Later she came home with a new boyfriend. His name was Francis. At first he was nice to me. He attended to my wounds. I thought things would finally go better. But I was wrong. He was more psycho then every other boyfriend she ever had. Roman moved to Barden and then I was alone with the two of them. And then she became bored with me or something and send me to Barden."
She needed another break and glanced at her father. He looked ten years older then when he had come in. But she still wasn't finished. She took a deep breath and carried on with the last part of her story.
"When I arrived here I did everything to avoid Roman. But he came to my dorm. He tried to hurt me again but then my room mate came back. Later he threathened me and demanded that I visit him. I was so scared but I knew I didn't had another choice than to obey him. When I visit him he hit me multiple times and raped me again. And when he was done, he told me to leave. Long story short he found out I was a Bella. He threathened to hurt my friends if I didn't do what he said. In the mean time some of my friends found out what was happening. And then I found out I was pregnant again. And despite everything I wanted to keep my baby. Roman disappeared and mom came back. And you know how that ended" she ended her story.
It was eerily quiet after she told her story. Her father needed time to proceed what he just had heard. She looked at him. He was pale and suddenly looked thirty years older.
"I am so sorry for what happened to you Bec. If I had known I would had get you out of there. I always knew something wasn't right. And I called your mom regulator to ask about you. She convinced me that you were okay. But that you were angry with me and didn't want to talk to me or see me. How could I be so stupid?" he said through his tears.
He felt guilty and she could see it. All those years she had been angry at her father. But seeing him like that she wasn't angry anymore. Yeah, she had a horrible youth but it wasn't his fault. He had done his best.
"It happened. There is nothing we can do about it anymore" she said through her own tears.
And then her father hugged her. And they stayed that way until the nurse came in to check on her. He let go of her and suddenly she felt tired. Telling her dad had cost her so much energy. She needed to rest. After the nurse left, she and her dad talked for a while. And then he left her too so she could rest. He promised to come back the next day.
Telling her father everything was the hardest thing that she ever had to do. But she was glad she had done it. And with that thought she fell asleep.