Bella was standing there in the crowd with her back facing him. The Doctor had searched nonstop for months and he had finally managed to find his wife. He placed his hand upon her shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. She turned around, revealing her beautiful-

Jack?

"Hey old man," the former con-man laughed, "don't forget to set your clocks for Volcano Day!"

~#~

Bang! The Doctor knocked his head on the grating as he woke abruptly from the dream. He was used to dreaming about Bella but Jack? He never dreamed about Jack. He rubbed his head to clear it and went back to work.

Repair completed, the Time Lord started putting the latest set of coordinates into the Tardis console that he had uncovered during his search for Bella. The pair were using fake identities so they were getting harder and harder to track. Fortunately for the Doctor their latest stunt had involved the theft of a fully-functional Chula warship from the Seivad heiress. The woman had placed a bounty on the man who had taken his wife that was being broadcast far and wide. If the Doctor didn't find Bella soon he would probably end up having to break her out of prison at the rate they were going.

Chula warship. Hmmm. That was probably why he had dreamed about Jack.

~~~###~~~

"Happy birthday Billie Bella, happy birthday to you!" Jack's voice reverberated against the walls of their new ship as Bella sat cross-legged in one of the bunks wiping sleep from her eyes. She had expected Jack to be off sexing for the whole night but he had surprised her.

She blinked in the glow of the flaming birthday cake he held aloft. "Oh my god did you actually manage to stick all 50 candles on that thing? I'm surprised it's not activating the fire suppression system in here!"

"I had to turn it off, for your information," Jack responded primly as he sat the cake in front of her. "Now, make a wish so I can turn it back on."

Bella closed her eyes and thought. She couldn't believe that it had been almost two years since her and Jack had met in that dingy bar. Since then they had traveled all over the Universe. Due to her lack of communication skills (even with Jack's best efforts to teach her she sucked at languages) Bella was generally stuck playing eye candy but occasionally she had a more active role. She was still proud of how she had recently helped Jack cheat his way through a two-day long card game to win the freedom of a shipload of slaves. For that scam Jack had dressed her up in an embarrassingly skimpy outfit and instructed her to wander about the room pretending to be bored while he played. At certain intervals she would give him a hug or accept some affection from him and use the physical contact to send Jack the images of the cards that the other players held in their hands.

Jack had taken the money won from that game (the slaves were just part of the pot) and used it to buy them their very own spaceship. Bella still couldn't believe that he had bought it so cheap but he had shown her the receipt to prove it.

"Oh, wish for it already. You know you want to." Jack's voice broke through her reverie.

Bella's mouth flew open, insulted. "How do you know what I want to wish for?"

"Because you haven't stopped talking about him for two years."

"Oh, shut up." Bella grumped and made her wish.

Once she blew out the candles Jack scooted the cake to the side and plopped down on the bunk beside her. "Close your eyes and hold out your hands for a really big surprise" he instructed with a grin.

"Oh, please tell me you're not going to stick your penis in my hand again!" Bella groaned as she obeyed.

"Fat chance! I learned my lesson after the last time."

"Thank God for small favors."

"Hey! I am NOT small!"

Bella fell back against the wall of her bunk roaring with laughter until Jack slapped her in the face with a large envelope. "Here's your first present, Hillbilly. Hurry up and open it."

Bella sat back up and took the envelope from Jack's hands. He seemed excited but she sensed a bit of nervousness in him as well. Whatever he had gotten her, Bella could tell he was unsure of her reaction. Knowing him it's a coupon for a brothel she thought with a sigh as she opened it.

Bella puzzled over the papers she found inside the envelope Jack had given her. It looked like some sort of medical form but Bella couldn't understand a word of it.

Jack pulled a sheet from the bottom of the small stack in her hands. "Here. I translated the summary for you already" he explained as he placed that piece on top for her to read.

"What is this? It looks like a DNA report. Who's it for?" Bella asked.

"It's for you." At Bella's blank look he continued. "Billie Bella, you're not developing like a normal human. You're fifty years old, for Goddess' sake but you look half your age! Less than half, to be honest. It's not normal, honey. I know what your grandfather said but I still wanted to check because I was worried. I mean, what if he had been wrong? What if you did have some nonhuman blood in you? You could be susceptible to all sorts of illnesses and not even know it. I didn't want to take that chance."

"Besides," the conman continued "it is not normal for a fifty year old human to still be a virgin, regardless of the century she was born in unless you're completely asexual, which you're obviously not. You talk about your Doctor waay too much for that to be the case."

Bella let loose with a resounding slap. "I do NOT talk about him! I haven't mentioned him in ages-you're the one who keeps bringing him up!"

"Yes you do." Jack countered.

"Oh yeah? When do I talk about him then, since you're such the expert?" Bella snapped.

"In your sleep. You call out his name almost every single night."

Bella didn't have a response for that.

"Annd," Jack continued with a long-suffering sigh, "I haven't managed to arouse you even the tiniest bit for two years. I was worried that I was losing my touch!"

Bella rolled her eyes. Of course he would want to soothe his wounded libido. She examined the paper quizzically. "Okay. I see it says human right here; I'm obviously human so are you happy now?"

Jack snatched the paper from her hands. "For such a smart woman you can be incredibly dumb at times." He started explaining the results to her. "Here's where it says you've got human in you. If you'll notice these numbers the geneticist discovered that only 25% of your DNA structure is human."

"What? There's no fu-"

"Just shut up a minute! The rest of your DNA was really hard to trace according to the agency. Apparently you're a member of an extinct species and it took them ages to figure out which one. That's why we had to leave Llentrah so fast. They were climbing all over themselves trying to persuade me to introduce you to them and I was afraid they would try to kidnap you or something. You're worth a fortune on the exotic species' market."

Jack pulled the sheaf of papers out of her lap and replaced them with a wrapped package. "Which leads us to your second present."

Bella hesitated before pulling on the ribbon wrapped around the gaily-covered package, afraid of what she might find within after Jack's last gift.

"They're books." Bella exclaimed in confusion as she examined the volumes. They were exquisitely bound hardcovers in two completely different languages. To her delight, one of them was actually in English. "The Legend of the Time Lords, written and translated by Professor River Song" she read out loud. "I don't understand. This is the Doctor's species. Jack?"

"Seventy-five percent of your DNA matched up with the extinct species called Time Lords. I talked Professor River Song into translating her book into English for you. She's the foremost expert on the legends surrounding them. Oddly enough, she also knows how to speak 21st Century English so she was able to translate it as well. Traded her a supply of her favorite lipstick in exchange for the translation. Man, that stuff was expensive!"

Jack pointed to the book written in Basic. "This is one of the original copies of her book. I got you a copy of both translations in hopes that it might help you figure out how to read. Not going to hold my breath at this point, but a guy can still hope."

"Hey!" Bella protested. "It's not like I don't try, it just doesn't make any sense to me!"

Jack chuckled. "I know but...two years and you're not even up to the level of a toddler. We need to work just a little bit harder, okay? That way if something happens to me you'll be better able to manage on your own."

"Nothing's going to happen to you Jack!" Bella protested. "I won't let it."

Jack grabbed Bella by the face, pulled her in for a resounding kiss on the cheek, then wrapped her up in a giant bear hug.

~~~###~~~

REVIEW RESPONSES

Scarlet: I honestly think the age problem is more in the Doctor's head than in reality. Due to her human background she ages faster than a full Gallifreyan but slower than a full human. She's 48 (50 now) but looks like she's in her late teens/early twenties and her mental maturity falls along the same lines. She acts younger than a human but older than a Gallifreyan at her age. So basically it's more of the Doctor getting over his hangup than it is a matter of physical maturity. As a result I'm not sure exactly when or if they will ever become physical.

Shewolf: As for the Doctor being over-possessive should he track Bella down, I think you've nailed it but I'm not exactly how much more over-possessive he can get at this point. I am wondering about his reaction should he see Jack with Bella. I mean, the Doctor considers Bella to be his wife and we all know Jack's favorite pastime….

Falling Right Side-Up: Sorry about the shortness of the chapters. I actually write nonfiction for a living (you can search for my username to find them) so I tend to think in scenes and chunks. I have to wait until every scene is fully formed before I put it in writing. The only exception to that was the scene where Ten panicked and bonded with Bella. I saw her throwing her pity party and gradually recovering, went to write it, then Ten decided to go rogue (which was why I was so annoyed).

This is actually the longest piece of fiction I have ever managed to write. One of my personal goals is to write novels; I've got tons of stories in my head but they end up either being really short short-stories or not written at all. I figured that playing in the Doctor's sandbox (since it is the only show I watch regularly) might make the learning curve easier. I expected to spit out a few chapters and have it fizzle like all of my other attempts but this one has surprised me, along with all of the attention it has gotten.

Basically, Please forgive my mistakes and short chapters. I'm just learning and this story has kinda taken a life of it's own.

Time-Twilight: Thank you for all of your reviews and encouragement. It means more to me than you will ever know.