A/N: Update update update!
Ha!
I'm so cool, I know.
Anyway, just like I promised, there's Spashley. Actually, only Spashley, lol. Thank you VERY much for every single feedback. I love them, I swear.
Mhmm, so yeah, enjoy.
25.
I take another deep breath before shyly knocking on Davies' front door. I told Brian to take me here instead of home after our "date" because I wanted to tell Ashley as soon as possible.
So what if it's already 10 PM?
I hope they're not sleeping.
Maybe I should have rung the bell instead. What if they didn't hear it?
Fuck, is it raining?
"Spence? What are you doing here?"
"I broke up with him," I breathe out, feeling kind of sick.
"Oh wow, come in." She tugs me by the shirt, leading me into the huge living room and I immediately slump down on the couch with a heavy sigh. "So he didn't rape you or anything?" she asks as she sits down next to me.
I quickly shake my head. "No. He took it pretty well, actually."
"Really?" she asks, surprised.
"Yeah, really," I nod. "So…" I look around the room. "Is Ashley home?"
I spot the grin on Kyla's pretty face as I ask. "Yeah. She's in the garden."
"Garden? It's raining outside," I say, as if she didn't know.
I hear her sigh. "I know. Don't ask, my sister is crazy sometimes. Anyway," she stands up off the couch, taking her bag from the table. "I'm leaving, so have fun with her."
"What?" I stand up too. "Where are you going?"
"Angel's place. I'm staying the night." She's walking towards the door, but then she stops and turns around. "Oh, I almost forgot. They miss you," she tells me softly.
"Huh?"
"Angel and Chris. They miss you, you know. I think you should hang out with us sometime. And by sometime I mean soon. I miss the old times, Spencer," she says, the sadness in her voice evident, and before I know what I'm doing, I make my way toward her, pulling her into a tight hug.
"I miss you guys, too," I whisper into her shoulder. "So much."
We pull apart after a while and I notice a small smile on her face. "Have fun tonight," she smirks. "Love you," she says, kissing my cheek before turning around and leaving me alone standing in the hallway.
Show time.
I slowly make my way to the back door and step into the garden, immediately noticing a small silhouette sitting on the bench. It's raining outside, but she doesn't look like she minds. She's just sitting there, looking at the dark sky, the raindrops falling into her face.
God, she's so beautiful.
After a while just watching her, I finally gather my courage and walk toward her, shyly sitting next to her. She doesn't even looks like she noticed I'm there; she's still staring at the sky.
"I broke up with him," I say quietly into the dark.
No response.
"I know I screwed up again."
No response.
"And you're apparently mad at me. Again. I'm sorry. Again."
Still nothing.
I let out a heavy sigh. I hoped that I'd get at least some response from her.
"I hear that word a lot from you, you know," she finally says.
I turn my head toward her, staring at her with confusion written all over my face. She still isn't looking at me. "Sorry. The word you use a lot."
"I know and I'm sorry," I use the word again. "I just tend to fuck up stuff often, you know? I'm so bad at making the right decision," I confess, staring ahead.
Then she finally turns her head to me. The raindrops are still falling into her face and her hair is all wet, but I swear I've never seen her look more beautiful. "You're not bad at it. You just have to learn some things," she says honestly.
I give her a hopeful smile. "Will you be my teacher?"
She immediately returns the smile as she answers. "I'd love to." After a second, she suddenly stands up, holding out her hand. "Come with me," she orders softly as I'm staring at her and her hand, but then I finally stand up, taking her soft hand into mine.
"Where are we going?" I ask while she's leading me to the back of the garden.
It's a huge garden, by the way.
"You'll see."
Oookay?
After a while walking in the rain, I spot a huge tree house on top of an even bigger tree at the very end of the garden.
"You don't want me to go up there, do you?" I ask with an obvious fear in my voice.
Didn't I mention it? I'm afraid of heights.
Since I was a child, I've been terrified of them.
A lot.
"Don't be scared, you'll like it, I promise." She smiles at me and squeezes my hand.
"I…I don't like heights," I say as we're standing under the tree.
"Don't be scared. I'll be right behind you," she tells me and gently pushes me in front of her. I shakily grasp the rope ladder with my hands and slowly begin to climb. In the middle, I look down to see Ashley right behind me as she said, but nothing else beneath her.
Jesus Christ, we're high.
And we're not even at the top.
I'm gonna die.
I'm gonna die.
Oh God.
Oh God, oh God, oh God.
"Spencer, don't look down!"
"I can't move," I whisper in panic, not moving an inch. It feels like my body is frozen.
"Yes, you can. Step after step, don't hurry. I'm right behind you, I promise," her gentle voice encourages me keep climbing and I finally find the last pieces of my courage and slowly begin to climb again.
"You're great, Spencer. Just step after step. Slowly," she's saying over and over until I finally reach a wooden floor. I let out a happy and relieved sigh when we're both slumped on the floor.
"Did you want to kill me?" I hiss, glaring at her.
She gives me a wink before replying. "No, not really. I'm sorry, I just wanted to show you this place."
"It's okay," I tell her after I calm down a little and look around. "So what's so magical about this place?"
"My Dad built this for Kyla and I. Well, especially for me, since Kyla's always scared of heights, just like you," she grins. "Come on," she takes my hand, pulling me to my feet and leads me to the other side of the tree house.
"Wow," I breathe out as I spot the view in front of me. You can see a big part of Los Angeles right before you, and you are just in the garden on a tree house.
How great is it?
"Yeah, I know." She sits down on the wooden floor, telling me to do the same. We are sitting there, just looking at the view in front of us while the rain is continuing outside. "I used to come here when I felt miserable," she says after a period of silence. "It always cheered me up, you know. Just watching the world in front of me, it was nice." She shivers a little. "I don't do it so often anymore. I don't know why, maybe I just grew up."
This time it's me who shivers when the cold air runs through my body. "Are you cold?" she asks with concern.
"A little bit," I admit, hugging myself. She then stands up, ready to leave me there alone. "Where are you going?"
"I'll be right back," she replies and then she's gone.
After couple of minutes, she finally comes back with a bag on her back. She starts pulling out a couple of blankets and hands me one of them while she spreads the rest on the floor. But then she stops for a second, turning her head towards me. "Or do you want to go inside? I mean, we can, I know it's raining at all and I don't want you to get sick, so…"
"Ashley," I cut off her rambling as she looks at me, her head tilted. "It's okay, I want to stay here."
"Really?"
"Really."
"Cool." She gives me her best smile and I can't help but smile back. I open my arms to let her know she should come under the blanket with me and she does, with a big grin on her pretty face.
"Better?" she asks me after we both are under the blanket, very close to each other.
"Yeah, much better," I whisper honestly.
"Spencer?"
"Mhmm?"
"Why didn't you tell me the truth about your job?" she asks suddenly.
I let out a heavy sigh, knowing it's time to be honest.
"I was scared."
"Of what? Me?" She looks at me, the confusion written all over her face.
"No… Yes… Maybe… I don't know." I take a short pause before continuing. "You know, my high school times weren't really great. Actually, it was horrible. I used to be an outsider that everyone just ignored. No friends, no boyfriends…or girlfriends, nothing. When I returned, I thought it would be the same, but it wasn't. I had real friends. I had you." I glance at her, seeing her staring at me, listening to every word I say. "It was something I always wanted but never had. It was the life I always wanted to live, but never did. I think I just didn't want to lose it. It was the first time I was really happy with my life and the way I lived it."
"But if you would have told me, it would've been so much easier. For both of us," she whispers, not tearing her eyes from me.
"I know. Don't think I didn't want to tell you. But first, I was scared, because I was undercover and my boss would've killed me and then…I was scared of your reaction. And as you could see, I was right," I finish with a frown, remembering those times.
Not something I want to think about right now.
"I was pissed because you didn't tell me the truth. I just heard it accidentally. For real, that wasn't the way I imagined it," she snaps back.
I let out a tired sigh. "Ash, do we have to argue right now?"
"No. I'm sorry," she says softly, turning her head back before her and the silence spreads around us again.
Until I decide to break it again. "Tell me about your high school times."
"There's nothing much to talk about," she says, trying to hide the sadness in her voice.
But I'm not stupid.
"Are you sure?"
"I want to forget about high school," she finally speaks after a while.
"Why?"
"Because… it was the first time I had my heart broken."
"Oh. I'm sorry," I whisper, placing my hand on top of hers. She turns her head back to me, giving me a weak smile. "You want to talk about it?"
She directs her stare back at the view in front of us. "No, not now. Maybe later."
"Okay."
"Spencer?"
"Mhmm?"
"When did you realize you liked girls?"
Ooookay, this wasn't a question I expected.
But I think the answer is easy.
"When I met you," I reply honestly, making her snap her head in my direction with wide eyes.
"Really?"
"Really," I smile. "Well…okay, I wanted to marry my best friend Holly when I was eight, but that doesn't count," I admit, making her laugh. "What about you?"
"When I was 15 and fell in love with my best friend."
Again, the sadness in her voice is so evident.
"She broke your heart?"
She doesn't answer first, but after I gently squeeze her hands, she finally admits it. "Yeah."
I don't ask her more. I know she doesn't want to talk about it and I want to give her time. Maybe one day she will tell me. And until then, I can wait.
"Isn't this beautiful?" she breaks the silence. "Just you, me and the rain."
"Yeah," I answer truthfully. "Beautiful."
"Not as beautiful as you," she smiles at me, making me blush with her words. She extends her hand to softly touch my face. "Don't blush. It's true."
"It's not. I'm not beautiful."
She frowns, taking her hand back. "What? Of course you are. I swear, Spencer, you're the most beautiful girl I know. And believe me, I know a lot of them," she adds playfully, making me gasp.
"What?"
She let out an amused laugh. "I'm just kidding, Spence. Wait a minute…" she looks at me suspiciously. "Are you jealous?"
"No."
"You are."
"I'm not."
"You so ARE!" she starts laughing, while I'm glaring at her and frowning at the same time.
She's sooo full of herself.
"Well…it wasn't me who was giving a deadly glare when Brian kissed me," I proclaim with a smirk on my face after she finally stops laughing.
"Ugh, don't remind me about that douche bag, please."
"Hey! Be nice! He isn't a bad guy. Actually, he took it pretty well when I told him I lo…like you."
Oh shit!
Shit shit shit!
Did I almost say I loved her?
Shit!
I can see the big grin on her face when she realizes what I just almost said, but luckily, she decides to ignore it.
"Well…okay, then he can't be that bad." She snuggles even closer to me, intensely staring me in the eye. "Spencer?" she whispers into the dark.
"Yeah?" I can't even breathe as I feel her cold breath softly touching my face.
"Can I kiss you?"
"Y--yes," I stutter.
Why does she make me nervous?
It's not like it's our first kiss or something.
So why am I so damn nervous?
I can't think anymore as I feel her soft lips on mine and her hand on my cheek, gently caressing it. I immediately moan at the feeling of her hot tongue in my mouth and place one of my hands behind her neck and the other behind her waist, pulling her closer to me. Our mouths are dancing in the same rhythm, exploring each other and suddenly I'm not cold anymore. "I love kissing you," she mumbles into the kiss before taking my lips with hers again.
Me too, Ashley. Me too.
So? Do you love me now?
Well, maybe you'll love me even more, since in the next chapter there will be maybeee some NC-17 stuff. Lol, who knows...?