Your throat's on fire and your head is sore; You can blame who you want but the fault is yours. Wake up now and face what's in store; It's the morning after the night before.

Dawn

Morgana groaned and buried her face in the pillow; the dull ache in her head becoming a sharp blinding pain at her movement.

"Gwen?" she whispered, coarsely, her throat dry from lack of water.

"Gwen!" she said more loudly.

There was no response and Morgana remembered that of course she would be tending on Lady Vivian this morning.

"Water!" she yelled, hopefully to her empty chambers.

She rolled over and pulled the pillow over her head.

"That's just great," she muttered; wondering why she had gotten so carried away the night before.

The night before

"Merlin?" she asked, her hand taking his in a soft grip, "tell me about your magic?"

"My magic? What do you want to know?"

"Sophia. I want to know what happened with Sophia. That never made any sense to me. And the Questing Beast. And Gwen's father. In fact, I want to know everything."

He refilled their glasses from the second carafe and settled in against the wall.

"Alright," he said, "I'll do my best to tell you everything. Let's just hope we have enough wine."

One hour past dawn

"Morning!" yelled Merlin, as he bounded through her door.

"Oooh," he said, "you look even worse than I thought you would."

"Merlin, how is it you look so... so... Merlin, how are you not hungover? If this is magic, then I want some."

"Sorry," he said ruefully, "it's just how I am. Besides, I think you drank a little more than me last night. Like a carafe more."

He set a tray down on her bed.

"Water, bread, sausage, more water and one of Gaius' awful potions. He swears it will help; just try not to gag on the taste. My advice, stay in bed. Vivian's been up riding since dawn. When I walked through the courtyard, she was busy berating a groom for not being groomy enough. And we don't want her murdered now, do we?

"Got to go. Got to tend to Arthur."

And he bounded out of the room, leaving her wondering if she had imagined him. The delightful smell of warm bread and sausages wafted to her nostrils and her stomach rolled over in anticipation.

She sat up and pulled the tray over, feeling a small warm glow from his care and his consideration. As she would from any friend's, of course. She had no inappropriate feelings for Arthur's manservant at all.

Not at all.

Control, Morgana, control.

Two hours after dawn

"Lady Morgana, are you awake?"

"Yes, Merlin, I did get a little bit of sleep but not much it appears. What are you doing?"

"I just came to take away the tray and bring you some fresh flowers. What happened to your vase?"

"Oh," she sat up and faced him, "um, it broke. Accidentally broke. For no reason. It just broke."

"Oh well, I'll just leave the bunch here and send a chambermaid with a new one."

"Thank you, Merlin," she smiled. "They look like bought flowers."

"Oh yes, Arthur gave me some money for... um... nothing. Nothing at all. Get some sleep. I'll ask the chambermaid to bring you some more water as well. Oh, and I'll take away the two goblets. Don't want gossip."

She nodded to him as he left and then her gaze fell on the beautiful bunch of flowers. Oh Merlin, you are not making this easy.

Midday

"Morgana," said a surprised and slightly shocked voice.

Morgana roused herself from her pillows and looked up blearily into the eyes of her maid.

"Gwen?"

"Are you alright? Why on Earth are you still abed? I thought you got enough rest at Gaius'. I thought you were no longer ill?"

"I was," she responded faintly. "Let's just say I was so happy about the fact that I... celebrated..."

"Don't tell me you drank all three goblets of wine I left in your chambers... by yourself."

"If I say yes, will you not look shocked and horrified at my wanton behaviour?"

"Oh Morgana," laughed Gwen, "usually, I would, but I'm in such a good mood that I can't bring myself to disapprove."

"Gwen? Why are you in such a good mood?"

"No particular reason," said her maid happily. I'm just... in a good mood. Now, do you need anything?"

"No, thank you Gwen. Merlin has been tending to me this morning."

"Has he? Must be between his search for giant rats underneath my kitchen table."

"What?"

"Oh yes," said Gwen, laughing as she did so often at Merlin's antics, "he burst into my home, flew under the table and said he was looking for big hairy rats with sharp teeth."

"Hahaha!" laughed Morgana, "oh dear, what do you think he was doing?"

"I have no idea," replied Gwen, "although..."

She paused and drew her lip in under her teeth.

"What, Gwen?"

"Well, it's just the moth thing. You don't think he was coming to... you don't think he was going to take one of my dresses, do you?"

Oh damn the crossdressing rumour. Why did I encourage it?

"No, Gwen, Merlin knows how few nice things you have. He would never steal from you."

She smiled, reassured. "You're right, of course, My Lady. Still, I wonder what he was up to." She shook her head. "Who knows when it comes to Merlin? It could be anything."

"Yes, you're right," said Morgana, thoughtfully. And here I was thinking we had no secrets anymore. Well, apart from... but that's different, that's my secret. Merlin, what are you up to?

The night before

"So you confessed to curing Gwen's father because you really did cure Gwen's father?"

"Yes," he admitted, unhappily, "Gaius was right, of course. I should have spent the time trying to find what was really causing the sickness but I just wanted everything... fixed... straight away."

"I never thought of you as being so rash."

"Well, it wasn't the first and only time. Forging Lancelot's papers of nobility was pretty stupid as well."

"I don't know," she said, "I kind of admire that. You want the people you care about to do well; to not be bound by stupid conventions. I can understand that. Of course, if you want to talk about rash, drinking the poison to save Arthur was pretty stupid. Couldn't you have... magiced... your way out of the situation?"

"Magic does not solve all our problems, Morgana," he said reprovingly. "Drinking the poison was the only way to save Arthur. Besides, it was Nimueh's plan for me to drink it as punishment for thwarting her attack on Camelot with the afanc.

"What? Merlin, who on Earth is Nimueh?"

"Oh, um, she's the sorcerer who summoned the afanc, who poisoned Arthur's goblet, the one who sent the wraith after Uther."

"One person has attacked so many times and I had no idea she even existed. What happened to her?"

Merlin looked at her hand still holding his and tightened his grip on it slightly.

"I killed her," he admitted, "to save Arthur's life when he was bitten by the Questing Beast. She controlled the power of life and death and I asked her to take my life in exchange for this. She double-crossed me and I killed her."

She put her head on his shoulder at that.

"I don't know how you do that," she sighed, using her spare hand to refill her goblet.

"Do what?"

"Make these sacrifices. Drink the poison. I don't think I could do that. Not for Camelot, not for anyone, even if I cared about them. I'm too much of a coward. I want too much to live."

"You stand up to Uther," he whispered, "that counts for something."

"I didn't stand up to him when Gaius was being dragged away by Aeridian. I didn't stand up to him then. You did. I thought it then."

"Thought what?"

"I want to be brave like you. I want to be brave enough to drink the poison."

"Come now, Milady," he said and he took her goblet from her hand. "Enough wine. You're getting maudlin and amort."

"No peasant should have your vocabulary," she mumbled into his shoulder, "there are nobles with only half your education."

"Well, for that you can thank the women in my family. They were rather... determined."

"I love your mother," she said, somewhat randomly.

"I love her too."

One hour after midday

Gods, she was hungry. Why did alcohol make you want to eat like this? It had been hours since Merlin had brought her breakfast. She was going to have to get up and ring for a chambermaid to...

"Lunch!" said a tripping female voice. It was the chambermaid who had brought her the water.

"Master Merlin asked me to bring you something to eat since you're feeling so poorly, My Lady. He seems to be very busy today."

She put the tray down and moved around opening the curtains and windows.

"Got to let in some light and air, My Lady, it's the best thing for a sore head. Can't have you wallowing in a dark room all day. Poor Master Merlin, that Arthur works his fingers to the bone. I swear, I don't know how he does it. But that's our Merlin, isn't it? Always doing something for somebody. Why, just the other day..."

Morgana sat up and starting eating her food, concentrating her attention on the prattling woman. She was young, about Merlin's age, with frizzy blonde hair, a good-natured smile, an atrocious upbeat mood and a certain attractive plumpness. And the way she had just talked about "our Merlin"...

"There we are," she said with a satisfied smile, having completely re-arranged Morgana's room, "I'll be back in a little while for the tray... and maybe I'll bring you some more water. My name is Muriel, by the way. If you need anything, just ask for Muriel. I'll come at once. Can't have Merlin disappointed with me."

She sighed, prettily. "Such a lovely boy. And that skin and hair!" She sighed again in a decidedly lovesick way.

Morgana wondered if Uther would really call it murder given the provocation.

One hour after sundown

"So, I met Muriel," Morgana greeted Merlin as he came into her room with a tray of chicken and beans.

She was dressed and bathed by this time; sitting by her fireplace with a book. She had a sudden urge to be better-educated and slightly more erudite than a certain chambermaid.

He put the tray down on the table and gave her a confused look.

"Oh yes. She's nice, isn't she?"

"Definitely. Very nice. Very sweet girl. Completely brainless of course, but then she is just a chambermaid."

"Morgana," he said reprovingly, "she's very sweet. She's constantly doing little things for me."

"Oh, Merlin, that's because she likes you."

"Wait... you don't mean...?"

"Yes Merlin, I mean. I think she's hoping you'll court her."

She pulled the tray over and began to eat; trying not to think about the sheer volume of food she had consumed that day.

"Will you?"

"Will I what?"

"Court her?" she asked, trying to sound casual and worried she was failing miserably.

"No, probably not," he said, "it's too soon after... um... and it's not as though she and I have anything in common and... besides, I doubt she thinks of me like that. She's just nice. I have to go."

"So soon? You just got here."

"I have to tend to Arthur. He's... well, that doesn't matter. Got to go. Enjoy your chicken."

"The meat is very nice," she noted, "but the beans are a little cold."

He left and she wondered if he had genuinely not noticed how this Muriel felt about him when it was so blatant to any observer. It seemed unlikely then that he had any idea about her feelings. Her decision to take control of her emotions seemed even wiser now. And she was even more glad about what she didn't do the night before.

The night before

"I love her too," he said. "Come on, My Lady, you have had far too much to drink. Let's get you to bed."

He'd picked her up then, just as if she was a child, and she was truly astonished at how strong he was. Her head was still on his shoulder as he slipped his arms around her back and underneath her knees to lift her.

He stood up, her body comfortable in his arms, and she had a sudden overwhelming urge to kiss him.

But she didn't.

One hour after sundown

"Control, Morgana, control. Remember, it's just what us nobles do."

And she skewered her chicken violently.

"Take that, Muriel."