Hi guys! Apologies for the long delay, uni assessments have kept my time unfortunately but now that I have one major assessment out of the way I thought I could catch up on some writing for you guys! We now have only 2 more chapters till the end of the story which is why I want to thank so many people who have reviewed, followed, favourite and taken the time out of their busy day to read my little story. I hope you enjoy this chapter and please review
All rights belong to Suzanne Collins
Rated M for mature nature.
9 months, 9 looong months and in a couple of weeks' time I will be greeting my baby. Though I have had 9 months to prepare myself for the big day, I still feel so nervous, so scared for when the time comes. The pain, the screaming, the blood, I've heard horror stories from other women not to mention when I was younger and my mother would help the women of the Seam bring their children into the world, I'm just so scared. I sometimes envy Peeta and how prepared he is, how calm and stress less he is, I wouldn't blame the baby if it preferred him over me, in these past months I have changed so much and learnt new things about my body and what it can do. Before I saw my body as a scarred shell, broken and destroyed, scarred with rough patches, an mark of the war and rebellion against the Capital for those to see, now it's a vessel , a vessel nurturing and carrying a life, it's a concept that seem so strange and foreign to me. I have never seen myself as the maternal type, but in these months of being pregnant I have seen my body morph into a vessel to carry my child, or should I say our child. My breasts have grown and my stomach is swollen but I don't mind it, whenever I grow scared of the unknown I just close my eyes and pat my stomach, a reminder of the life I am bringing into this world, I breath in and out and sometimes I feel my bubby in their kick, as if she can read my thoughts and feelings and reminding me that it's ok. Peeta has been there for me every second and every step of the way, he even went the extra mile when I reached my 3rd trimester, working down to 3 days a week instead of the usual 6, and even on the days he works, he starts extra early so he can come home around noon. I feel guilty sometimes on how easy my life is now, sometimes I have periods where I can't stop smiling, though I do this in private, happy at the thought that despite the best efforts of the Capital to bring me and Peeta down they couldn't but then I feel the black cloud swallow me and the twinge of guilt and regret comes back, the images of Rue, Finnick, Prim and the others flood my mind, how they died, I then feel guilty for the happiness that has come into my life, that's when Peeta finds me and reminds me that to live the rest of my life in misery and suffering would be a disrespect to the memory and lives of Rue, Finnick and Prim and all the others that died with them, that they wouldn't want me to live my like this, instead they would want me to live and be happy at the thought of new life coming into this world. It's those days where I feel safe in his arms when he holds me tight and doesn't let go, where I fall asleep in his arms.
I owe him so much, these past months of my pregnancy have been difficult and yet he has been patient, he has put up with my hormones of being incredibly horny and wanting him as soon as he gets in the door, to uncontrollably crying and accusing him of not finding me attractive anymore cause I'm fat. I do admit when I couldn't even fit into my father's hunting jacket because I became so large I cried for hours, but Peeta would just hold me and get me to rest my hand on our child and tell me that if my father was alive, he would understand and be happy in the knowledge that the reason I couldn't fit into his jacket was because I was with child. I was no longer light on my footsteps anymore, Peeta could even hear me walking down our stairs or into the kitchen I sounded like an elephant and ate like a wilder beast. My consumption of food increased by the day and now I was consuming cheese buns and olive bread by the dozen, but Peeta wouldn't care; he would just sit there smiling rubbing my tummy as I engorged myself. I do admit I miss the woods terribly, Rory, Peeta and Haymitch all agreed that as I was later in my pregnancy now and close to due date I shouldn't be going in there now, Rory now just walks with me to the rim of the meadow and back always with me, but I can't even walk into the meadow otherwise I will want to go further and further. I miss the wind on my face, the smell of pine, the green forest floor and the sounds of the animals. I miss sitting in the meadow feeling the long grass under my skin, picking the dandelions and bringing them home with me, the smell of lavender and prim roses, and it makes me homesick.
The happiest day during this was my baby shower, I wasn't used to it to say the least, it kind of reminded me of the Capital in the sense of attention and cameras and so on, Effie had organised it for me but was told by Haymitch and Peeta to pull it back, much to her dismay, the look on her face when I said on the menu I wanted something called pigs in a blanket was mortifying to say the least, she visioned crepes and things you would find in the Capital, but I reminded her that this was District 12, and I wanted a District 12 shower, she negotiated that if she couldn't have waiters and a red carpet then she wanted the finest red velvet cupcakes delivered and a District 12 themed shower with cut outs of deer's and trees, I was happy with that. Little Flynn and Annie came all the way over with Jo, Flynn drew me pictures and rubbed my belly talking to the baby while Annie supported me, telling me of what was to be expected after having a baby, she brought a beautiful blanket from District 4 of sea turtles and fish and a mobile that had sea horses to soothe the baby at night. Jo came and to see her made me feel like I was looking at my old self, before my mind was consumed with baby brain and I was thinking of nipple cream and bottles, suffice it to say Jo did look so out of place and sat in the corner sipping her champagne not wanting to be at the scrapbook table or the onesy decorating table, when the discussion came to lactating and cracked nipples and messy diapers, Jo quickly made it to the corner of Haymitch and started taking swigs from his flask.
I wake up one day to the sounds of birds chirping through the open bedroom window, my back aches today, more so than it has been but I put it down to weight of the baby, being of small frame this baby weight has taken its toll on me so I put it down to that. I get up and get dressed, I put on my green maternity dress that is made of soft cotton and walk down the stairs, the mangy cat Buttercup runs down past me, its bell jangling away, I slowly walk down the stairs keeping a hold on the railing as I go. I inhale the warm scent of waffles, my favourite, I walk into the kitchen where Peeta is to find him serving waffles on a plate with caramel sauce and freshly whipped cream. I sit down to my de-caffeinated coffee and orange juice as I scoff my food down, I savour the rich caramel sauce and drink my coffee as Peeta finishes and cleans up, he leans down and kisses me on the lips and I can taste the waffles from him too
"I'll see both my girls later on, I won't be too long just need to do some paperwork and be home by noon" he smiles at me and puts his jacket on leaving. I eat my meal in silence with Buttercup sitting idly beside me, I sit there and wonder what to do with the rest of my day, my back continues to ache with the muscles feeling like they are tight and coiled. I place my dishes in the sink feeling like I can wash them later, I look outside and see the perfect weather and walk on the porch, I close my eyes and inhale the scent of the woods lingering in the air, oh how I wish I was free again and running in the woods jumping over rocks and climbing trees. I ring up Rory and see if he can walk with me today to the edge of the meadow and the woods, on the third ring he answers and I plead with him.
"I'm sorry Kat I really am, but I've been called down to the Justice building I'm sorry, but look I have tomorrow off so I will go with you then ok? Don't go by yourself you hear me?" his tone is of a worried brother warning his sister against going out to that party on the weekend but I so badly want to go. I tell him find and after my phone call I ponder who else I can call. Haymitch is passed out by this time, Greasy Sae is down at the Hob and she's too old for the walk, Delly? well I no longer count her as a help or friend. It's just on the outskirts I want to go is it really that bad? I start to become fidgety and annoyed, my back aching is not helping at all with it, in the end I decide to go myself, I mean how bad can it be? It's only on the edge and I won't be too long, I get changed into my stretchy tights and light t-shirt with jacket and start my walk. I feel the light cool air hit my face as I pass Haymitch's house and start my walk, I look over my view and immediately start to feel better in mood. The beautiful long grass, smell of lavender in the air mixed with pine, I spot a deer and a couple of rabbits, oh how I missed being able to hunt in my condition. I walk up to the edge of the meadow and lean against a tree, soaking in my sights and relaxing, I try in vain to get comfortable as I lean up against the tall, strong oak tree but nothing. When I finally feel some comfort I feel it, I feel it run and I don't know what to do. I look down and see the wetness I have made, I touch my legs and I'm sopping wet, I start to feel it then. Oh God, Oh God, Oh God. My water has broken, I'm alone and I'm out in the fucking woods by myself and my water has broken you idiot Katniss! I try to have slow movements and slowly walk but I keep wincing as my back is fucking killing me, shit, shit. I try to quicken my steps but I find I'm just too scared, I put my hands out resting myself on whatever I can find, tree trunks, branches all the while trying to stay calm, I breathe in and out, in and out but it's so hard when I can feel my heart racing Oh God. I'm such an idiot Katniss! I've put my baby and myself in danger when all I had to do was wait for 1 fucking day for Rory, 1 day! But no I couldn't do what made actual sense; I had to go what I think is best which is basically the opposite of logical, shit!
I try to quicken my steps without making too quick movements that might endanger myself or the baby, I hold my baby as I try to reach home but it seems it just takes forever and ever, I rest upon a tree to catch my breath, I'm sweaty and clammy and hot and my bloody back aches. God, I look up and feel the heat of the sun blaring on me, I get back up to try and get home quickest before I hear my name called.
"Katniss" I look around and can't see anyone. I continue my attempts at walking before I hear my name again.
"Katniss!"
I look up and see the last person I would expect or want to help me, Delly
Delly runs to me from across the path leading from the meadow, I turn and continue my feeble walking. I take small steps before I hear her rushed steps and the look of concern on her face.
"Katniss, what's wrong? Are you injured or hurt? What are you doing out here?" her shrill voice does nothing but aggravate me and my condition as well as my ears even more. I ignore her as I try to walk calmly back home before her shrieks get louder
"Katniss, Oh my GOD has your water broken? Katniss we have to get help or get you home quickly, Katniss let me HELP!" I hear the strain in her voice as she walks beside me, her hair a mess and her cardigan baggy around her.
"Delly, what are you doing here?" I ask, clearly annoyed
"I was trying to find strawberries for my jam but that's not the point here Katniss, why are you out here so close to your due date?" I wince in pain from my back, aching even more and the trail of the walk
"Go home, Delly I can handle this fine thank you very much"
"Katniss you can't expect me to leave you out here like this are you mad?"
"No Delly you idiot I am tired, I am aching and more importantly I am leaking, so just get out of my way now or…." I prepare to go on before I see a side of Delly I haven't seen before.
"KATNISS, NOW YOU LISTEN TO ME AND YOU LISTEN NOW! I have done things in my life that I am proud of and that I am not proud of and hurting you is top on my list of things I am not proud of, now you listen to me and listen good, I am not leaving you out here as you are about to give birth to yours and Peeta's child, now hate me all you want but I am helping you out of here and you can go on and hate me later all you want ok?" I see the fire in her eyes and the determination, though she tries in vain to be assertive and angry I think it's cute as Delly could never be fearful in her life. I look at my surroundings and see the situation I have placed myself and my baby in. I nod my head and place my arm around her as she helps carry me, I do admit, having her here and leaning on her for support has helped me. I find that with this added support I am getting home quicker as I start to see glimpses of Victors Village, as we get closer with Delly giving me reassuring words of how not to panic and how the baby will not be making an appearance for some time, I see Haymitch tending to his geese in the yard.
"Haymitch" Delly shouts as we walk past his house on the way to mine. Haymitch's bleary eyes widen at the sight of Delly carrying me and he drops his feed bucket.
"Stupid girl, what HAPPENED?" He rushes over and picks me up in his arms carrying me inside
"Her water broke, she was walking out near the meadow alone" Delly chases after us with Haymitch taking long strides, he kicks our front door open and takes me in walking up the stairs to Peeta and I's bedroom, he rests me on the bed
"Walking by yourself in the woods really Katniss?" Haymitch gruffly says before shouting "Delly call Peeta NOW"
"I wanted my walk in the woods but Rory was busy I didn't think…." My sentence is cut short as Haymitch interrupts
"Of course you never think that's the problem! Delly, what's happening, where is Peeta?" as he bellows, he grabs my fan from the wardrobe and puts it on the chair, putting it on me as I sweat to try and cool me down
"The phone is engaged, they're probably making an order" I hear Delly say
"Well run to town and tell Peeta that his bun is about to come out of the oven, and I tell you girl, you better run like your ass is on fire" as I hear Delly run downstairs
"Haymitch, I don't know how much you're able to help me"
"Don't worry kid, I'm gonna call the doctor for you now, I mentored you and Peeta through the games and all, I think I can mentor you through this" he helps me get comfortable before I look outside the window again to hear the birds chirping like they were this morning, I Katniss Everdeen, have survived the Hunger Games, Quarter Quell, a Rebellion, lost a sister, brought back my lost, hijacked husband, yet this journey, this adventure I was about to begin on, was the scariest of all.
There you go guys, another chapter. Like I said now that my assessments have finished I will be able to dedicate a bit more TLC to my story, it only has 2 more chapters left as I have started on a new story to. It's very exciting the next chapter as we have been waiting for the arrival! I want to thank so many people for their support and loyalty and who have taken the time for the kind reviews, following and placing it under favourites, thank you and this week will have the next chapter. I hope you enjoyed