Thinking about it sometimes makes me want to cry. My past is bleak and cold, unlike now where I'm at home with my body, or as at home as I can be now. So the thought of saying this on TV in front of close friends is horrifying. It has kept me up all week and that's why I'm here, confiding in you. I know that I don't have much going for me, but I feel as if I've really grown as a person throughout this process, and it's only the beginning. I can't leave, not yet. By the way, no progress on the Cameron front, I'm still practically invisible. But hey, that's life, right? So, here's me Marissa Von Bleiken signing off for anotehr sleepless night. Hopefully I won't have that dream about Ryan Murphy again. We can live in hope.
Marissa xxx