Authors Note:
Alright, I saw it. The Battle of the Five Armies. And now my soul is quite heavy…but I knew that would happen. My Kiliel heart is badly broken, and dissatisfied. But it was good that I did see it, because it made me come back home and start writing furiously, through tears. OK, I really just have to rant a bit. I will post my mini-review at the end of the chapter here, so you don't have to wade through it before the chapter.
RIP BoFA Kili, Fili, Thorin… I will be using all of the lines from the movie appropriate for my fic (because there are so %$# few of them); just maybe not in the scenes they were shown…
I walked out muttering under my breath….I LOVE my story so much BETTER! So I rushed home and to numb the pain, read LMTF, intro to the Epilogue (yes I had it written already, and chap 25 is not it…).
Mr. Jackson, you started this heartbreaking story arc… You will forgive me if I finish it…
To my reviewers: Thank you so much for your words of encouragement! Cynn3Rose, noir Ecrivain, pass the porn tea, Vi-violence, moonlightkiss1515, Margaritasc, wizardxp, amber85, Tuounra, Soonerwxgirl, Jampaqued, Jinxwriter, Gaaralove4-ever, Haku'slover18, underneaththisskin, sparkle85, Eclaire stones, LadyBardock, mfaerie32, k215y, Syblime…Luv you guys!
Enjoy.
AW
Thorin walked heavily along the stone walkway, in the halls of Erebor. His footsteps echoed as he gazed at the golden light shimmering througout the cavern, the golden light shining off the gold treasure now lit by many sconces on the walls. His long, royal vestment, deep blue in hue and rimmed by sparkling detail hung from his shoulders, and wafted around his feet. He decided to forgo the crown this day. His silken, glistening dark flowing hair spread around is shoulders, the silvery strands woven in between glistening in the low light. He was walking away from his throne, the one he now often sat on heavily. He had been around the heaps of gold for too long, looking on menacingly as the rest of the dwarves halfheartedly looked for the Arkenstone around him. Their growing indifference angered him…
Our gold. MY GOLD… I will not part with nary a piece of it for anyone or anything…
A voice, his own, yet not his own, wandered through his mind, as an uninvited shadow.
They have taken the heart of the mountain as their own…I know it; one of them… they betray me… the voice continued, tormenting him. As he walked further away from the caverns, he again became aware of the little object he had in his grasp. He raised it slowly and his pale blue eyes, bloodshot from lack of sleep, stared at it.
It was a little rag doll, the kind with curly yarn for hair, and a face carefully, intricately stitched with red lips, large eyes and long eyelashes. The ivory fabric skin was yellowed, streaked with charcoal and age, and the small, splendid vestments carefully placed on the doll were now stained by grime. Thorin shook, all over, and a lightness of mind came over him. He gently, sweetly stroked the little doll's hair and straightened her dress.
"Oh, Dis…" he whispered, as a mist drifted over his eyes, and a sad smile found its way on his face. He veiled his eyes in memory, leaning back on the cold stone that made up the columns.
Thorin saw himself striding proudly through the doors of Erebor in a happier era, greeted heartily by those surrounding but looking for someone special…. She was the reason he would rush home whenever he went away from Erebor.
"Thorin! Thorin!" her sweet little voice echoed in the darkness of the halls of their kingdom, their home, his vision darkened because his eyes were not yet used to it, after traveling in the light of day. Then he would see her…sunshine itself…head full of curly, yellow blonde locks, the round face with the big, hazel eyes and a wide mouth that would only laugh and utter the sweetest of greetings. "Brother mine, I missed you so! You were gone too long this time!" she said as she ran into his arms. Thorin lifted her up, holding her sturdy young frame against him as her little arms wound around his neck and her butterfly lips showered his cheeks. Thorin smiled at his little sister, who was then a mere 10 years on middle earth.
"Dis, my dear. How have you been?" He said, a happy, true smile on his face. She looked at him with wide eyes and excited expectation. He gave her a sly look."Ahh…have you been good?"
"Oh yes! I even beat Ferin yesterday in shooting targets." She said, smiling self-assuredly. Thorin gave a feigned look of shock.
"Really, you did!" he said. "You are getting quite good at that."
"I will be the best archer in Erebor! You will see!" She exclaimed. "Well Thorin…do you have something for me?" She said craftily. "Come on, don't make me beg…" Thorin laughed gently and put down his little sister lightly on her toes. She clasped her hands eagerly. Thorin made a conjuror's display while handing her a small wooden box.
Wherever Thorin travelled while the emissary of his father and grandfather, no matter how short or long the trip, he would be sure to bring home a little trinket for Dis. As was their custom, she was not allowed out much beyond the walls of the kingdom, so she would collect his treasures and sit on his lap as he told her fanciful tales of his journeys.
The Thorin of today, standing alone in a deserted kingdom, gasped sadly as the memory played on.
That time, so long ago the trinket in the box he gave Dis that day was a beautiful little golden dragon, with eyes of emerald, and scales of citrine, wings of clear quartz. The teeth and claws were black, and he was wound around a glimmering golden moonstone. Dis's eyes widened as she examined her gift.
"Oh…It is beautiful, Thorin…But frightening too…" Dis said, touching the delicate wings. She looked up at him, adoration and reverence in her gaze. He practically felt the kiss…
Had he known what was to pass he would have never given her that…Thorin shuddered as another vision entered his head; one darker and sadder.
It was black night and bitter cold as the survivors all gathered at the top of the heavily damaged fortress of Ravenhill. It was a good enough view to see the desolation spread before them. Dale was in flames. He was holding a shocked, shaking little Dis in his arms, as they stared at the fires erupting from the mouth of Erebor. He tried in vain to cover her eyes and ears, to shut out the screams of their people as Smaug ravaged Erebor that night, but her innocent eyes saw it, and her sweet young ears heard it. She stared, unblinking, the visage of shock etched on her face, which was coated in dark ash streaked in tears that revealed her white skin.
"Thorin…Thorin…they are gone…they are all gone." Little Dis lamented. Then she looked up at him with that expression that broke his heart. "Are we going to die too, Thorin?" she asked.
"No, Dis." He said, holding her against him, his voice hoarse and cracking with grief. He looked towards his father, grandfather and brother, who too were wracked with despair, and unable to take care of the little girl in their midst. Thorin held her close, smoothed her coal streaked golden tresses and kissed her as she clung to him desperately. "No…you will not die, not while I still draw breath, love. I will take you away from here, and protect you, Dis, always." he promised solemnly.
Then her face changed in his mind, to the Dis he knew just a year ago…a serious, stalwart, strong female dwarf, face etched with the strain of a life lived hard, with too much sadness. Gone was that sweet, innocent child, the sister he once knew. She was then a grown dwarf, one who defied all her male kin, and ran off on her own when they lived in the world of men, to prove that she would make her own way. She returned, grief stricken, with two little boys in tow. Those two boys, whose father he never knew, he became like a father to.
They were speaking serious words in the kitchen of the hovel they called home that night, in the quiet, stark mining hills of Erid Luin. Her eyes, the hazel orbs reddened, glared at him.
"Must you take them both from me, Thorin?" She lamented, her eyes grief stricken. "Fili, my firstborn love, I know, he must go. It is his birthright you hope to recapture. But my Kili too?" she said, hand over her heart. "You will break me…"
"I hope to recapture Erebor for us all, Dis…" Thorin said, the brooding darkness upon him. The feeling of injustice ever present in his craw since the time he saw his grandfather beheaded on the field of battle, and his father wander off broken with madness, welled up. Did she not see? He stood up and poured himself a glass of something strong. "Besides…I cannot take but one on this quest. The elder will not be without the younger. They are two parts of a whole. That is how you raised them, Dis." He sat down before her. She bent her head forward.
"Aye. That I did." She whispered bitterly. "Much good it has done me…"
"You taught them well, sister. They are now warriors befitting of the Durin line." He said, pride in his words, his hand in a fist. She looked up at him.
"The blood of their forefathers flows strong in their veins." She said. "As is their headstrong nature…and recklessness…" She said, a sob in her throat.
"And their unending skill and courage, Dis." Thorin urged. "They are fierce, accomplished fighters. The best fighters of my company, save Dwalin. They will stand faithfully by each other, defend each other to the end, and each will be safer that way, I know it."
"I can't allow it." She said, folding her arms. Thorin sat back, unable to become angry with his baby sister; not about this. A few minutes of silence passed between them.
"Dis…they want to go, desperately." Thorin said quietly. "They are old enough that you cannot stop them." Dis looked up at him, and in her eyes he could tell…she was defeated.
"Try as you may to convince me, brother, I still feel this is a fool's errand." She said. "A troop of dwarves against a dragon…Is this treasure worth your life?" She glared at him. "Is it really worth the lives of my sons? You three are all I have left."
"Yes, it is worth it…we need to reclaim our fatherland, Dis. I think you know this, in your heart." Thorin insisted. "Think of what we stand to gain…I long to see you at the hearth of our home once again, my sister…"
"I love you and trust you with all that remains of my heart, Thorin." She said, through frustrated tears. "But these boys are my life…You best bring them back to me safe and sound, Thorin. Or don't come back yourself." Dis said, standing up, storming off.
Thorin drank down the fiery liquid in one draught, the burning spreading past his chest to his belly. Maybe it was too much to ask of her. She had been through so much. He looked up towards the door to the living room, where Fili and Kili had come to, beckoned by their mother's harsh tones. Thorin knew they wanted their mother's blessing on this quest. They stood silently in wait, faces serious. Both sets of eyes clung to his. Thorin looked back at the two sturdy young men, in full regalia, axes slung all over the lighter haired one, bow and sword on the dark. His beloved sister-sons…
Thorin let Dis cool off a little in the frigid night air before he walked up to her slowly. Her golden locks tumbled from her head, over her dark purple frock. She looked forlorn in the pale moonlight, her face turned towards the large orb in the sky. The vision of her that night, the one he remembered most vividly, made him draw breath. She looked over to him, sadness and resolve on her face.
"Go on, Sons of Durin, on with your quest. I hope you find what you seek, Thorin. But I hope you eventually realize what true treasure is." Dis sighed.
His sister's words rung in his ears, as he blinked his eyes and came to the present, his gaze set back on the little doll in his hands.
"Uncle? Uncle!" The voice of Fili echoed in the blustery caverns.
"Here!" Thorin said, turning around, wiping his eyes to face his eldest nephew. Fili was on one of the higher walkways, and ambled down the stone steps quickly to join him. Thorin sighed; Fili looked so out of place without his brother behind him…
"You sent for me?" he said, nearing Thorin slowly. Fili approached him with a look of caution, a wrinkle between his brows. Fili had grown used to his uncle's harsh, wide eyed stares, and his screaming for them to keep searching, keep searching, for that godforsaken stone…But he seemed so different now. Back to the dwarf he knew and loved; Thorin's eyes were soft…
"Fili…" Thorin said, his eyes blinking. "Come…I want to show you something." Fili came in close. Thorin handed him the little doll.
"What? What is this?" He said, looking at the doll, and then looking back up at his uncle, his face confused.
"That…was your mother's…" Thorin said, a small smile on his regal face. Fili looked down at the little, old toy as his face changed over to surprise. He shook his head.
"My mother…Dis…played with dolls?" Fili said, incredulously, a small smile on his face, nearly breaking into laughter. A doll in the hands of his stern, steadfast mother just seemed so…strange. Thorin chuckled.
"Come." Thorin said, walking ahead of Fili, down the stone corridors. Fili followed, questions burning his chest, but eager, happy to indulge his uncle in any way, to maintain this feeling of lightness. Anything to get Thorin away from the hoard room.
"Where are we going?" he asked.
"We are in the royal living quarters," Thorin said waving his hand around, as they entered a grand hall, Fili spun around, looking up at the long, ornate table, the grand, elaborate wrought iron chandelier. He gasped and smiled, then hurried to follow his uncle. They entered a room, small and cozy, a small fireplace on one wall, with a small bed in the corner, rich tapestries hung on the rails. A large chair with a footstool before it was tucked near the fireplace and shelves lined the walls. A small dresser with a mirror stood against the wall; child-sized, petite.
"Oh my gods…" Fili whispered. He walked slowly up to the shelves where there were lines upon lines of little statues…of fairies and sprites, animals and birds… this was a girl's room.
"This is your mother's old room." Thorin said, turning around, looking all about with softness in his gaze. Fili gasped. "Many a night I spent here telling your mother stories to make her sleep." Thorin smirked, stroking the chair. "Your mother was not always the woman you know her as. She was once just a sweet innocent." Thorin lamented. "Life and hardship made her what she is today."
"I remember when you would tell us stories, uncle. On a chair much like this, back in the blue mountains." Fili said, walking past Thorin to the bed his mother once lay in. "Stories of this place, and the dwarves that came before us." Fili had his arms crossed as he stood up against the wall. Thorin had his arm on the mantle of the fireplace, leaning heavily upon it.
"You see now, Fili, why we had to return. At all costs." Thorin said. "This place was our home." He walked over in front of Fili, who stood tall before him. "We belong here." Thorin spoke, voice low and insistant. He grabbed the back of Fili's head and neck firmly. "Don't you see? Everything I have done…I've done for you all…"
Fili pursed his lips and for that moment he stared into the eyes of the dwarf he admired above anyone else. He took a deep breath and nodded.
"Thorin…Thorin…" a far away voice echoed, one filled with urgency. Thorin turned around, alert, concerned.
"Its Bilbo…" Fili said. Thorin turned around and walked out of the living quarters quickly.
Thorin had grown more and more fond of the quiet, cerebral hobbit. Bilbo Baggins had surprised him on too many occasions, being often the voice of reason, wise and clever beyond the years upon his face. He had proved his worth many times over and humbled Thorin with his courage. And now, with the confusion and suspicion Thorin was begrudgingly admitting he felt was taking hold of his mind, he found himself seeking out Bilbo as a rather unlikely confidant. He trusted the little hobbit, surprisingly much more than he expected…The tone in Bilbo's voice alarmed him.
"Bilbo!" Thorin shouted as he continued along, looking up towards the upper reaches of Erebor, climbing up the stairs. Fili followed close behind.
"Thorin!" Bilbo's voice echoed, yet he still could not be seen. Then, as they rounded a large wide pillar, they ran headlong into Bilbo. In his characteristic manner, Bilbo eyes widened and he stepped back, startled, near the edge of the landing they collided on. Both Thorin and Fili reached out to grab him before he fell back into the depths of Erebor.
"Be careful Bilbo!" Thorin exclaimed, crossly.
"Are you alright?" Fili asked, setting the flustered burglar upright. Bilbo panted heavily.
"What's wrong? Why were you searching for me?" Thorin asked urgently. Bilbo took a few more breaths, holding his finger up and bending over. Thorin's shoulders dropped and his face twisted into a smirk. "What is it, Master Baggins..."he said, in a low, gravely tone. Bilbo finally caught his breath.
"Thorin…they are coming…." He said. Thorin's brows knit. "The men of Laketown…I saw them coming over the hills…"
"What? They are coming here?" Thorin gasped….
They come for our gold…our gold….the shadow in Thorin's mind had returned. Bilbo pursed his lips and shook his head.
"Well…no, not here…the bird said… oh…what's his name again…the king-bird?" Bilbo stammered, brows knit.
"Roac..his name is Roac. Never mind that. What did he say?" Thorin said, growing impatient. Bilbo looked up at Thorin, and his eyes became steeled.
"He said they come to take shelter in Dale; but surely they would come here after." Bilbo said. "There are scores of them, traveling over the hills." Thorin gasped and raised his hand to his beard.
"So they will…" he said. "Let them just try…" he said, the darkness taking Thorin over again. Fili saw it, and glanced over to Bilbo, whose expression showed that he saw it as well. Bilbo pursed his lips.
"That's not all, Thorin." He said. "Roac said a dark haired dwarf was traveling with them. Alive and well…"
"Kili? He's alive!" Fili said, his eyes widening with joy, for the first time in days… "Oh thank Mahal…" he shouted.
"Yes…well…he is alive and well…but a prisoner of the elves…" Bilbo continued. Thorin's eyes widened and he approached Bilbo swiftly, grasping his arms.
"Elves? What elves?" Thorin urged, practically shaking Bilbo.
"I did not think the red-haired elf would take him prisoner…" Fili said, despondently. Bilbo looked between the two of them.
"Elves, quite a few of them, I saw, at least a legion…and no, she did not…Thranduil took him prisoner." he said rapidly, to one dwarf then the other. They both stared at him hard. Thorin released him.
"So…the elves ride in with the Lakemen. How kindhearted of the Woodland Realm scumlord…" He looked down at the lakes of gold beneath them. "We must secure the gold…we have to sure the entrance. They must not enter." He said. He looked over to Fili. "Call everyone to the gates!" He shouted loudly. Fili grabbed his arm. Thorin looked around him slowly, turning to face his nephew, eyes hot with anger.
"We have to rescue Kili." Fili urged, desperation in his voice. Thorin stood up tall and defiant.
"They will do him no harm, for now…" Thorin said, nonchalantly. Fili was incensed.
"What was it you were just telling me, but a few short minutes ago, uncle… we belong here, in Erebor. Well, so does Kili." Fili urged. Thorin shook his head.
"We cannot spare the manpower. We must barricade the door, and build up the wall to the first terrace…"
"I will go by myself if I must…but I will save my brother." Fili said, a sturdy resolve in his young face. Thorin pursed his lips. Bilbo swallowed hard, looking between them both. This was the second time Fili defied his uncle for his brother. Thorin turned around, angered, heading towards the front entrance of Erebor.
"Do what you think you must. You will have to scale the gate upon your return." Thorin muttered.
Bilbo looked on at the retreating dwarf with sadness. He had always thought that family was paramount to dwarves. He looked up at Fili, who was standing before him, fists clenched.
"I…I will come with you…" Bilbo said, decisively. Fili looked over at him, his eyes softening with surprise.
"Thank you, Master Burglar." He said, striding over to place a hand on his shoulder. "But no…I think it best you stay with my uncle…try to speak some sense to him…maybe he will listen to you." Fili said, worry tainting his face.
Bilbo sighed and nodded. Bilbo felt it would actually be easier to rescue Kili…Then Fili knit his brows.
"Now…how will I find out where Kili is being held."
"Squawk…." The flapping of wings made them both gasp and look upward. "I believe I can be of assistance…" the raven said.
Angelwrath's BoFA Review:
{{{{Spoiler alert! Do not read tbelow if you have not seen the movie! }}
Smaug scene…really cool. Loved it. The scene in Dol Guldor…awesome!
AH….My favorite scene : You know it…all what…131 seconds where Kili tries to convince Tauriel to go with him, she refuses, he whispers sweet nothings in Khuzdul, Legolas is a major buttinski, and then Kili gives her the token? They give each other that look we've been melting for…Then they're off…awwww how sweet…She is choked up….
What THAT'S IT?! No more Kiliel until they are screaming for each other on Raven hill? NO WAY! Unfortunately, that lakeside scene was the only scene they had together both alive, without impending death.
Ok Erebor scenes and Thorin's madness was impeccable. Loved Bilbo. Bard in Dale was wonderful. Thranduil was a great cold leader, great fighting machine, elegant and deadly. Battle scenes and Dain were stupendous. Then my man Kili yelling at Thorin…sniff. I didn't think it was a great scene when Tauriel went up against Thranduil in dale. Oh Legolas…don't you see?
Ok Ravenhill. The death of Fili- that one made me weep… with anger. It was so unlike strong, courageous Fili to be assassinated like a rag doll, dropped dead in front of his brother just for Thorin's pain. No, he deserved a more heroic, suitable demise. I guess that was the point. Didn't like it at all…
No…Tauriel cant die yet…My heart skipped a beat when Kili jumped on Bolg, but he got bested so fast I nearly missed it by blinking. And of course, canon rules; Kili had to die. It still hurt my soul to see it, even if expected. Kili's death scene was moving but…and the death kiss a half an hour later, oh, it made me weep but…seriously?! Why in hell did they not get a kiss in before he got offed?
Thorin's death, on the other hand, was epic. The battle between him and Azog preceding it was great. I never thought there was a good reason behind Bagginshield until this movie. They had me whimpering.
And her final speech…UGH! Of course it f**** hurts! And my Tauriel would have NEVER, EVER asked for her love for Kili to be taken away…it is WAY too precious to her. I am ticked! Really PJ?! Ugh! .
The dispatching of Legolas to the north and the tie in to LOTR was contrived at best. You could not really feel bad for Legolas, even though he just got jilted for a dead dwarf. The rest of the movie for me, after that, was a slow let down. All in all, could have done with less of stupid Alfrid (AND MORE KILIEL HELLLLOOOOO!)
BoFA was a really good movie, but…a bit of a disappointment for Kiliel shippers, I feel. I can only pray for Kiliel in the extended scenes (whimper…). Ok, ranting over.
AW