Okay, I'll give you full disclosure. I've never had three people kiss me in one night, or professed their love to me even though I thought they hated me, so I have no idea if the last chapter was accurate or not.
Anyway, second to last chapter! Yay! Has anyone guessed what's really up with Dr. Pidd yet? I don't know, I'm typing this right after I finished the last chapter. I hid three clues in my story of who she is, and this chapter we're finally going to find out what the hell is up with her terrible advice and why she's so creepy! Oh, and I guess some other stuff not involving Dr. Pidd is also going to happen.
"We'll be running down the street, yelling 'Kiss my ass!' I'm like yeah, whatever, we're still living like that!"
Chapter Twenty-Five – You're Gonna Hear Me Roar!
Stan just barely managed to duck in time to dodge the second chair that was thrown at him, which disintegrated as well. Kenny couldn't help but stare in horror as Angela angrily started towards them in a menacing manner. He looked down at Stan, who was struggling to his feet, before looking back at Angela, who was picking up another chair.
"Stan," Kenny said slowly, staring with wide eyes. "Run!"
Angela let out a primal scream, and Kenny quickly grabbed Stan's arm, dragging him to his feet. They both let out a scream of fright when the third chair soared past their heads before the two of them broke into a run. Angela gave chase to them, picking up and throwing everything she could reach at them.
Students looked around, confused, as Kenny and Stan weaved around them, trying to get away from the angry ball of fire that was Angela. They made it to the double doors leading out of the gym and rushed out into the hallways, with Angela hot on their heels.
"What the fuck is she so angry about?" Kenny gasped as they ran down the hall. "I thought she was hoping this would happen!"
"Just keep running!" Stan panted.
"You two are going to pay!" they could hear Angela screaming after them. Kenny almost stumbled over his own feet at her words.
"What did I do?" he wondered, quickly catching back up with Stan. His friend couldn't help but roll his eyes. He was about to reply, but something else sped past their heads and cut off his words. They only barely just managed to not trip over the scattered remains of whatever Angela had thrown at them.
Stan looked over his shoulder and saw that he and Kenny were managing to gain some distance from the crazy bitch, and for a moment, he thought that they would actually manage to lose her. Despite her anger, she was running in high heels, and that made running much harder, even when fueled by a burning rage.
But then, while still chasing after them, she reached down and in one swift motion, managed to pull off one of her shoes and throw it, hitting Stan squarely in the back. He let out a cry of pain and fell to the ground. Kenny skidded to a halt and turned back towards his friend, looking terrified. He quickly lunged forward and tried to pull Stan to his feet, but Angela was already closing the gap and was dangerously close to them.
For a moment, Kenny thought that they were doomed, but then he saw a flash of movement, and then Kyle was there, tackling Angela out of the way before she could attack them. He slammed her into the lockers, taking her by surprise, but she was quick to recover. As Kyle tried to keep her pinned against the lockers, she jabbed him hard in the ribs with her elbow, and she tackled him to the ground when he released his grip on her.
Angela landed on top of him, but Kyle managed to work his foot under her stomach and kick her away from him. She slowly stood and turned towards Kenny and Stan, anger burning in her eyes, and she started towards them again before being tackled from behind by Kyle once more. She let out a scream of rage as the two of them struggled with each other.
Kenny and Stan both blinked in surprise at the sight, completely unable to move and help their friend, as if forgetting how their legs worked. Somehow, Angela managed to end up on top of Kyle during their struggle, forcing him on his back and pinning his arms to the ground. They were both breathing heavily as Kyle snarled angrily at her, while Angela had her face mere inches from his.
"Kyle!" Kenny cried in fear. But before he could even move to help him, Angela was suddenly thrown off of his friend by Cartman, who managed to easily pin her down and sit on top of her, a triumphant look on his face. She screamed and spat in rage, struggling to free herself, but Cartman didn't even sort of move.
Kyle, still breathing heavily, slowly sat up and glared slightly at Cartman.
"What took you so long?" he wondered. Cartman gave him an annoyed glance.
"You try running when you're out of shape," he growled. "It's not easy, I'll tell you that." He turned to look at Stan and Kenny, who were both still watching in amazement. "Are you guys ok?" he asked them.
"Yeah, we're fine," Stan managed to gasp. "Just a bit out of breath."
"Where did you guys come from?" Kenny asked. "And how did you know she was chasing us anyway?"
"You ran right past us," Kyle explained. "And this one was spitting so much fire, it wasn't that hard to follow you guys." He went over and kicked Angela in the side just for good measure. "It's a good thing too. She looked ready to tear you apart."
"What did you guys do to make her so pissed?" Cartman asked, ignoring Angela's angry insults that were being thrown at him as she struggled to escape. "I need to know so I can do it too."
"I broke up with her," Stan announced, to Kyle and Cartman's utter amazement. The two of them exchanged glances, looked down at the still furious Angela, then up at Stan.
"Really?" Cartman wondered. Stan nodded in reply. "Dude, it's about time!"
"Get off of me, you fucking fat tub of lard!" Angela hissed up at Cartman. Kyle rolled his eyes and casually kicked her in the side again.
"Shut up, you bitch," he growled at her. "This is all your fault in the first place." He narrowed his eyes slightly, glancing at Stan and adding, "Well, mostly your fault."
Stan felt his heart shatter at his words, but before he could say anything, Kenny suddenly spoke up.
"So, what do we do now?" he asked. "I mean, I don't think Cartman wants to sit on that piece of shit forever, but if we let her go, she's just going to kill us." Angela spat at him in response to his words.
Stan was about to suggest one of them getting a teacher, but he was interrupted by the sound of high heels clicking down the hallway, and then Dr. Pidd appeared a moment later. She still had the creepy, condescending smile on her face as she took in the scene, and she let out a sigh like she had to let her dog out right after she had just gotten comfortable.
"I was afraid this would happen," she sighed, shaking her head. "I'm sorry it had to come to this, but if you had all just followed my advice, this all wouldn't be happening right now, you know."
The four friends exchanged confused glances as Dr. Pidd pulled out a briefcase from seemingly nowhere and calmly unlocked and opened it. Angela continued to squirm underneath Cartman, and she let out a gasp when she saw the crazy therapist.
"Dr. Pidd, help!" she cried. "They're ruining everything!"
"Oh, don't worry, dear," Pidd replied calmly, rummaging for something in the briefcase. "I'll fix this. Everything can still go according to plan, I just have to make a few adjustments. But I'm always so disorganized, I can't find anything! I'm so scatter-brained sometimes." She giggled in the creepiest way as she continued looking through her case.
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Kenny asked cautiously.
"What's going on here?" Stan added, scratching his head in confusion. Dr. Pidd looked up and smiled her terrifying smile at them, causing the four of them to flinch.
"Oh, I'm sorry, I'm being terribly rude," she said in a voice that sounded like she was trying to make a baby laugh. "You see, being a therapist is only a cover for my real job." None of the boys looked surprised by that news. "In actuality, I'm Cupid. Or rather, a cupid. It's my job to go from place to place every Valentine's and spread love wherever I go."
The four of them exchanged surprised glances with each other before turning back to the woman. "You're joking, right?" Cartman wondered.
"Oh sure, I can see why you would be sceptic," Pidd replied, going back to her briefcase. "We don't go around shooting too many arrows at people anymore. There was a lawsuit about that, so we had to stop. Fortunately, we have… other means of influencing people's emotions. I started out using more indirect methods of suggestion to bring more love to this school. But, unfortunately, it looks like I'm going to have to use more direct methods now."
Then she let out an "aha!" and set her briefcase on the ground. She seemed to be working on something which required both hands, and when she stood, they were terrified to see that she was holding a big-ass needle that was filled with a strange, pink liquid. She took a step forward and, before any of them could move, she lashed out a hand and seized Kyle by the throat, easily lifting him off of his feet.
"Kyle!" his three friends cried out at the same time. Kyle felt his breathing immediately cut off as he attempted to struggle out of her grasp, but she didn't even seem to notice him.
"Let him go," Stan growled at her, taking a step forward. "What are you doing?"
"You see, I love reading romance novels," Pidd explained calmly, tightening her grip on Kyle's neck. "They're kind of my passion. So, when this poor young girl came to me, wanting to live out her own romance story, I jumped at the opportunity. But now you kids had to go and ruin everything. Thankfully, my love serum here should fix everything."
"Poor little girl?" Cartman snarled. "She's a psychotic bitch!"
"Say what you want," Angela sneered. "Didn't I tell I always get what I want?"
Cartman glared down at her and shifted his weight ever so slightly so that he was choking the air out of her lungs.
"Don't make another move," Pidd said cheerfully to Kenny, who was trying to make his way over to her. "Or your friend is going to get it." To their horror, Kyle's struggles were getting weaker as he began to run out of air, and her grip on his neck didn't seem to be loosening. "Stop struggling, my dear," Pidd said soothingly. "You'll just make it more painful and harder on yourself."
She held up the needle, but before she could jab it into him, there was a loud, hard crack, and she let go of Kyle before falling face first onto the floor. Standing behind her, holding her guitar over her shoulder and looking rather smug, was Reeah.
"Did you kids need a rescue?" she asked, a calm, knowing smile on her face.
"What are you doing here?" Kenny blurted out, his eyes wide.
"I had to pee, but I had no idea where the bathrooms are," Reeah explained. "I heard a commotion going on over here, so I thought I'd pitch in. Lucky for you guys, I always have my guitar handy." She nudged the unconscious Pidd with her foot. "This crazy bitch was in my town a few years ago. I thought I had recognized her."
Stan wasn't listening as he quickly made his way over to Kyle's side, and he was relieved to see his friend was still breathing. He had fallen unconscious as well, and his breaths came out as gasps, but at least he was still alive.
Cartman stared over at them with wide eyes, completely unaware of Angela shouting and spitting with rage. He was breathing hard, and his brain didn't seem to want to work out what had just happened. He looked down at Pidd, still in complete shock.
Reeah looked around at them, then slung her guitar over her other shoulder. "I'm going to go find you guys a teacher before anything else happens," she told them. "Just stay here and don't move." Then she turned on her heel and made her way back down the hall. They could hear her voice echo off the walls as she called out, "Man, I love this town!"
And there you go. The second to last chapter is completed. I'm sorry if Reeah coming out of nowhere to save the day seemed like a bit of a deus ex machina, but keep in mind, Stan and Kenny were chased out of the room with a huge crowd mingling about. Someone was bound to notice them and give chase. Plus, I didn't know how else to have Dr. Pidd reveal herself as Cupid and be defeated.
Anyways, in the last chapter we will be wrapping up all loose ends and finally ending this damn thing. And then we get to move on to the sequel! Yay! Anyways, how many of you went back to try and figure out Dr. Pidd's identity? I had actually planned on that plot twist from the very start, so yay me! It doesn't change the fact that she's terrible at her job. Both of her jobs.
Leave a review and remember, you will never have abs. Love, Pizza.