Decided to update today! I hope you like it. Thanks for the reviews. You guys make me so happy! 3
By the time those words escaped his mouth, Lord Sesshomaru had already trapped her against the doors and his compressing frame. He yanked the silk material she clutched against her making her jump at the fierceness of his actions. His heated gaze dropped to her breasts and he growled at the beautiful sight of them. Unlike her, he could see perfectly well in the dark. He filled his hands with them, the taut points of her nipples rubbing against his thumbs. Rin caved at his touch, her arms loose beside her unable to do anything to stop him. Her heart belonged to him after all. She shook from the cold of the room and from the determination of his actions like a trapped animal that would soon be devoured, but Lord Sesshomaru didn't care. All he focused on was the intolerable need to taste her, to devour her with is mouth, his fingers, his cock. His little human.
He bent to take a nipple into his mouth, groaning against her skin as the wet swirl of his tongue caused a needy breath to escape her lips. Rin felt her knees buckle at the tugs on her flesh. She steadied herself by wrapping her arms tightly around his neck holding him against her. Her fingers curled and grasped his long hair when he made his way to other puckered bud, sucking long and hard, his fangs rasping the skin. His hands roamed her body with rough possessive strokes, each touch searing her skin. Her breath hitched when he neared where she craved to be touched the most. Her attraction and arousal towards him were undeniable, yet her logical side remained and presented itself. He had deceived her and he had not apologized for it. Her eyelids fluttered open towards the dark ceiling maybe it wasn't too late to stop him...
"Leave, my lord," she begged. Even as she uttered this, she pushed against his hand when he cupped her sex, rubbing her clit with the heel of his palm. She trembled as the pangs of pleasure clouded her thoughts. Her thighs opened wider for him urging him to touch her deeper. "Leave," she said faintly with a shaking breath.
Lord Sesshomaru didn't respond, he stopped only to roll the beaded scent-hiding bracelet off her wrist. Her scent charged into him, making his head swim. He wanted to lose himself completely in Rin. Forget everything and take her just as a woman and man. Bury himself deep inside her. He rose to claim her lips with a rough hunger that she hit the back of her head against the door. He was selfish, he knew. He hated himself for it. But when Rin responded eagerly to his kiss, he forgot everything and thought only of the fire growing between them, scorching them, that even in the nude, they weren't naked enough.
She sank into him, pulling his face to her when he tried to pull away to change position. Lord Sesshomaru closed his arms around her waist lifting her against him, her breasts molded against his hard chest as he lowered to taste her neck. Her favorite spot. His tongue made tiny circles on her delicate flesh and her pleasured-filled purrs were music to his ears. He turned on the hearth with a flick of his fingers and quickly that same hand molded against her body, returning to its onslaught. He caressed and squeezed down her body, pushing and pinching the cold round mounds of her ass, pressing her against the hard velvet of his erection that burned against her skin.
Rin tingled in his embrace and each time she felt herself being dragged by that powerful tide. His touch, his fierce but tender kiss, making her forget that just as he was the source of her pain, he was the source of her comfort too…
How would she ever escape this man?
With tears in her eyes, she melted in his touch. Her body accepted him fully, her fingers stroked over the tight planes of his shoulders, her hips bucked against that large member that she craved. She wondered how it would feel to have the entire length inside her, stretching her wall to wall. She reached between their bodies and took him into her hand as best as she could. She smiled against his lips as she slid her hand over the rounded head. It pulsed at her touch. He growled into her mouth, his tongue sliding inside her, caressing her from the inside urgently. He was rock-hard, velvety smoothness. This part of him so large and powerful like everything else about him.
How she wished he was all hers...
Just as her pleasure was about to subside at just that thought, he picked her up in his arms and took her to bed. He positioned her over the crepe silks of her leveled futon and Rin laid there obediently, her braid curved over the pillows. She watched him with silent, but eager anticipation. She was no longer cold.
A tiny smirk of victory pulled his lips as he spread her thighs apart so he could see her sex parted and glistening in her arousal. He hovered over her, enormous and dominating. He lowered to kiss her tearing eyes tenderly and brushed his lips over the curve of her button nose, to the slight part of her lips. He planted open-mouthed kisses down her body. He left no part untouched, her body contracted and spasmed at every little touch
"Mine," he whispered greedily against her skin, reaching up to pinch the tannish peaks of her breasts. "You're mine, Rin."
He found the fury that he felt at Rin being accompanied by his general subside completely as he took her nipple in his mouth and slid his fingers between her wet nether lips. She writhed under him already wanting release of his torture. The wet sweep of his tongue and the feel of his expert touch making her thrash her head around in delight. When his thumb found her clit, her fingers plunged into his white locks, watching with glossy eyes completely dazed with need. She smoothed the silken hair away from his face so she could watch him, the golden glow of the hearth jumping over his magenta marked back, shadowing the bend of his muscles that flexed with his movements. He was a God and how she loved him…how it hurt to love him.
She placed a soft kiss on the crescent moon on his forehead as he took the other bud into his mouth. She arched her back with a hiss at the combination of his mouth and fingers. She pushed herself deeper into his mouth. Only he could cause this gnawing hunger, only he could make her lose complete control with a single touch. She wanted everything from him, his love, his body, his attention…
What did Lord Sesshomaru want from her besides her body?
He continued stroking her soaking mound as he tortured her breasts with his tongue and teeth. He felt her reaching that point of release, could sense her orgasm coiling in her belly. Her thighs closed on him and dropped open as her moans got louder when he deepened the pressure, her hips bucked against him, and the grip on his hair tightened as she exploded against his hand. He didn't stop his ministrations until she was descending her orgasm and all Rin could do was mumble. What warmth he felt at hearing his name on her lips.
Placing a light kiss on her lips he pulled away and sat back on his knees between her spread legs. He flattened his flat hand above her sex pulling the skin back gently so he could see her silky folds stretch. Her core dripping in the aftermath of her orgasm. Rin clenched her eyes as his fingers seared the skin there, his wet thumb circled that nub that was far too sensitive after her release. She was used to Lord Sesshomaru's stare by now. He loved to take in every delicate fold of her body. He drew her legs over his thighs and froze when she felt the large head of his cock probing her virginal entrance….
Her heart stopped as she clasped the wrist closest to her, "What are you doing?!"
He thrust her hand away from him and pinned her wrists above her head in one swift movement. He spread over her taking care not to crush her under his weight. He rocked his hips gently against her and locked his eyes deeply with hers, "Rin. I am going to take what I should've taken a long time ago."
"No, you can't," she cried. "It's not fair."
"Perhaps," he answered her, placing a light kiss on her jaw. "That is why you are going to invite me inside you."
She felt that pulsing thickness sliding easily between her slick folds and she closed her eyes ignoring the pleasure it brought.
"Say it, Rin," he breathed, caressing a kiss across her mouth and dropping to nibble her neck. "Will you give me what had always been intended for me? Will you let me make love to you till morning? Will you let me stake my claim on your body?"
Her eyes flung open at the word love. She remembered how simple it had been for Tsukuyomaru to say those words earnestly to her. She suddenly felt guilt and shame flood her as she returned to reality. Would Lord Sesshomaru say those words as easily as he had?
"Let go of my wrists," she uttered gently and to her surprise, he complied.
Immediately, Rin cupped his face, her thumbs grazing over the markings on his cheeks, her fingers grazing the lobes of his pointed ears. It took all her courage to ask him without flinching, "Do you love me?"
Her sudden question caused his eyes to flare and his mouth to twist in surprise. He sat up then and so did she. She forced herself to keep her eyes on him even if his silence was like a shot to the heart. There was an immediate change in his features as if the word love was the worst thing she could have said to him. The tears rolled down her cheeks and blinded her vision, but she didn't turn away from him. It was him who averted her hurting stare.
He couldn't say it...
"Don't you think I deserve an explanation? A reason as to why I lower myself this way with you even though you'll end up mating with another woman? But you can't say it, can you?" Her voice shook, but she was glaring. "Yet, you dare to try to claim me as I am a piece of property."
He clenched his hands into a tight fist and looked at her. He wanted to open his mouth to speak, to express what he truly felt for her, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. What use would those words be if he couldn't have Rin as his mate? Having her this way was easier…but easier for who? Easier for him and his pride? He did not want to admit that the Great Lord of the West had fallen for a human. That he was following the same steps of his sire…. damn it.
"Say something!" she screamed frustratingly.
He could see how selfish he had been. Her disappointment sliced inside him and through him.
"Rin..." Lord Sesshomaru started, but he was too stunned for words. Whatever he attempted to say lodged in his throat and he buried it.
Rin saw the vulnerability that was exposed for an instant, vanish. She knew then, he wasn't planning on telling her anything. She wiped her tears resentfully.
"You can't say a word because your damned pride won't let you. At least, I am strong enough to admit that I love you and that I hate you too. That I wish I had never made the choice to go to you that night so I wouldn't have to see this side of you."
He reached for her and she moved back in the bed pulling the silk over her body. What in hell was happening? When did the dynamics of control shift? Who was this woman before him? Her brown eyes were bright in her fury.
"Don't you dare touch me. You can't get past the fact that I am a human and it repulses you. You're ashamed. Do you imagine me as a demon when you take me?"
"No," he defended quickly, but still maintaining that icy tone that Rin was already tired off.
He was upset that she would even consider he would stoop so low and pretend she was something she wasn't. She loved her as he was, a human, but how many times had he shown his repugnance to her kind? This was his doing. The fact that she thought so low of him was his fault.
He watched her heaving chest in her anger. He wanted to comfort her, to treasure and protect her, but all he was doing was hurting her with his quietude. He wasn't good with words and it was a specific set of words Rin wanted to hear from him and he couldn't bring himself to say them.
She slipped out of bed and her eyes darted around for her undergarments.
"This will be the last time you'll ever see me cry over you."
At least not in front of him.
She walked to her hadajuban and his enigmatic gaze was glued to her every movement. He couldn't bring himself to say anything or push her away either. The thought of the general taking his place in her heart and her body, made his blood boil. He had never been so indecisive in his life and he had never lost control of a situation like this. He had hidden his emotions so well for decades that all of them flooding at him at once was making his chest constrict to the point of suffocation. He does love Rin, but if he tells her what she wants to hear then it will surely hurt them both. Those words come with hopes and with promises he can't fulfill. Admitting his love won't keep him from his duties…
Keeping her in this way is better for both, yet he is not satisfied with that and neither is Rin. He wants to claim her. To taint her with his mark. For her to only look at him. But asking for that was arrogance on his part because his touch was no longer enough for Rin. She had changed her mind…and she could change it whenever she wanted. She no longer was giving herself as easily as she had that night. He had made a mistake in allowing her to do as she wished as a child. This strong-willed Rin was driving him mad. He needed to be honest and allow her to choose on her own. But if she says no? If she says she will leave his side? There was only one spot Rin could take and it wasn't as his mate….
He gulped thickly at the thought.
Would he tie her down and force her to stay?
He walked to her as she finished dressing, but didn't get near her. The hurt look that had been on Rin's face was completely composed now. If she was still hurting, she was hiding it bloody well.
She twirled his direction and stared him dead in the eyes causing him to bewilder once more, "Until you can tell me what you truly feel for me, do not seek me and do not place demands upon me. I am not asking you to mate with me and I am not promising you that I am going to be your concubine. All I want is for you tell me for once in your life what lies in in your heart. I am tired of guessing what goes on behind your mask. None of our time together has any worth if you cannot tell me what you truly feel."
Truly feel? Where had he heard those words before? And who in the pits of hell was this woman? What happened to the girl that had declared her undying loyalty to him and that would follow him to the end of the world?
That girl no longer existed.
The woman in front of him knew her worth. He realized with a pang of anguish that he was losing Rin. He was losing any control he had over her if, indeed, he had any to begin with. He couldn't control her like he did his kingdom or his subjects. Ultimately, it would be Rin's choice if she chose to be by his side with what little he offered her and maybe her refusal at his meager offering was one of the reasons he did not want to admit his love for her. He couldn't live in a world without Rin.
"I am accepting Lady Chiyoko's proposal for schooling and don't attempt to stop me," she said casually as she begun to undo her braid.
Rin was trembling, but she wouldn't let him see. He needed to come face to face with his feelings just as she had. She was gambling she knew. Lord Sesshomaru could mate his princess and forget all about her easily. Compared to his princess what did Rin really have to give him? She did not come attached to great lands or power. She was a simple girl. All she had was because of him. And if it was her body he wanted, he could overpower her easily too. He could take her if he wished and she wouldn't be able to stop him.
His silence hurt worse than she thought it would. It had taken all her courage to ask him that question and he had shut her down. She was the humans he despised, what made her think she was any special? Sure, he took care of her. He was kind to her, but what place did Rin hold in his heart? Rin wasn't even sure if Lord Sesshomaru would be able to put aside their differences and see her for who she truly was.
Lord Sesshomaru finally spoke and sought her eyes, "I won't touch you intimately as you request that is my promise to you." He stepped forward, composing himself back to the fearless prideful lord she knew well. "Part from me only these two years, Rin, so you can gather your thoughts and I will do the same. I'll try to seek an answer for you because as I have stated before, I value you above all others. Is that fair to you?"
His piercing gaze glimmered in its heat and masculine confusion. It burned her, it pained her, but she fought it. She braved him unflinchingly and focused on the glow from the hearth against his features.
"Yes, my lord, that is fair. But if you can't be truthful to me when I return, we will never embrace again."
Sesshomaru's heart jumped in what he recognized as pure fear. The fear of losing Rin forever.