A/N: Okay so before you start reading I want to say that I'm quite nervous about this chapter and I'm aware it may not be one of my best, I've really struggled with it so don't be too brutal *bites nails*

Only two more to goo!!

Gabriella distantly heard the sugar fall into the cup of coffee she had just made.

She stood motionless, as she leant against the kitchen counter. She had got in around a half hour ago and she had got changed into her pyjamas and then she hadn't felt like sleeping so she made herself a cup of coffee.

To say things were different were a little bit of an understatement. She had felt like there was a mist in her head that was clouding her vision from everything, from every aspect of life to how she treated herself, how she felt things, how she looked at life and to how she treated her friends. Part of her was surprised that they were still friends with her, she couldn't blame them if they wanted to abandon her completely, but they chose not to and that still confused her. But she wasn't about to question them. After a long journey she was finally seeing the light.

But if she was quite honest everyone babying her was driving her insane. She understood that people were worried about her and just wanted her to get better, and wanted her to find her way again and she knew that she hadn't particularly given people any reason to not suffocate her on how she had reacted and how she had behaved. If somebody would have come to Gabriella 18 months ago and told her she would have tried to... commit suicide, even the words stung to think let alone say. She would have told them that they were totally insane and they had to be checked in to a mental hospital. Her actions had shocked her. She never thought that behaviour like getting drunk and having sex with some random guy would have been her style.

Everything had been a blur.

From the second that Troy had broken up with her and she had gone downhill it had all been a blur, like she hadn't been in her own skin. It was like she was watching her life being lived and watching her life falling apart when she hadn't even been there. She hadn't been in control of her life and that's what she was trying to gain. It had been a great fight to get where she had gotten and she was finally starting to see things clearly and hopefully she was going to get back on track sometime soon. Get firm back on the tracks. Although, she knew that she had alot to do before she was fully healed, one was to maybe apologise to Bradley for how she had treated him. For how she had just used him because she wanted to feel loved and she had wanted to feel needed. And she had used him as a rebound. She had to apologise for that.

She had to apologise to her father, because she knew that she had disappointed him. From where he was she knew he was watching and she could almost feel his presence every day, just because she couldn't see him or talk to him anymore that didn't mean that he wasn't there. Looking out for her, just like he had once promised her. But she knew he would have disapproved with how she had dealt with things. And even Gabriella thought she was stronger, and better than all of this that had happened. But then again, people were always there to surprise you.

Gabriella carefully crept up the stairs, as one movement that caused a noise would make her mother spring up out of bed and cause a conversation that Gabriella didn't want to have. It wasn't that she didn't love her mother caring for her, she really did. But there was caring, and then there was wrapping in cotton wool. She wasn't expecting much but after almost a month after the 'event' she would have at least liked some breathing space.

But as she rounded closer to her bedroom door she could hear the flipping of pages.

Oh dear.

Great, her mother was up and waiting for her in her bedroom now while she made a cup of coffee? Who did that? What the hell was that? Gabriella cradled the cup close to her small body as she used her weight to push the door open. And as she stared at her bed, her eyes went wide and shock spread throughout her small body.

It wasn't who she was expecting.

And the cup of coffee fell on the floor. Gabriella winced as the porcelain fell onto the ground, and didn't make a noise. "Troy?"

There he was sat on her bed. In all his glory, his hair styled perfectly, a white tee shirt on his body sculpting and showing off his god like figure. His legs were crossed, and there was a book in front of him. But what shocked her was his eyes, the cyan colour that highlighted everything and seemed to be alot brighter than when she had seen him. But they shone something to her, what was that? Determination? She wasn't sure.

"What the hell are you doing here?" She whispered harshly.

She knew her mom hadn't woken up, because there had been no noise and she was sure if she listened very, very intently that she would hear a slight snore.

"You texted me?" Troy told her, more of a statement than a question, his whisper just as quiet but harsh and the way he looked at her was as if she was completely insane. Maybe she was, she didn't know.

"What? No I didn't!" Gabriella defended. "I only left 30 minutes ago did you smoke something in that time?"

"No! I have the text." Troy responded and pulled out his cell phone walking silently over to Gabriella and showing her a text that was 'supposedly' from her. And the text read 'I know this is out of the blue. But can you come over? We need to talk xx'

But Gabriella had her phone didn't she? It was in her bag that was on her dressing table. "I'm sorry, what? No I have my phone in....." She began rummaging through her black bag, finding her IPod, her keys, her purse. And no phone? What? "Oh my god..." She mumbled as she almost ran to her bed and emptied the bag, lip gloss falling out and a packet of Kleenex. She then lifted her glance and looked at a very, confused Troy.

"You want me to call it?" Troy asked, his voice more than a whisper now, and Gabriella nodded subtly. Great this was all she needed, somebody to have stolen her phone and to be sending stupid texts from it. "Hello?" He began his face then narrowing in confusion. "Sharpay?"

Oh that was just great. Trust Sharpay to steal her phone and start meddling in her business, business that didn't concern her. She loved her and everything but sometimes? For instance now she really could have slugged her.

"Yeah I'm at Gabriella's." Pause. "Yeah coincidence..." He trailed off rolling his eyes in annoyance.

But was it a blessing in disguise that he was here? If she was truthful she had actually been considering calling him and talking things through. But she hadn't had the guts to do it, she hadn't had the guts to deal with the confrontation. When it came to Troy it was always a sticky situation, always on that totally confused her. On one hand she really wanted to get back together but the other side the more winning side told her, no screamed at her to stay away from him. Until she was better. But would she really be better until she was with him again? That was the question that was on her mind and possessing every thought she had at the minute.

"Gabriella!" Came a harsh whisper snapping her from her thoughts.

He did look so desirable. "What?"

"You kinda zoned out." He half chuckled but the look on his face and his cyan eyes did scream at her that he was being sincere and he was concerned. "Well this was fun." He joked. "But I'm gonna go now, you look tired..." She knew the last part was probably an excuse to leave rather than stay in a room and actually talk with her. Troy stiffly but quietly moved his body from the bed and was almost about to put one leg over the balcony to climb down.

When one side of her head finally overpowered the other.

"TROY!" She shouted but in a whisper and then clamped her hand over her mouth to stop herself from shouting anymore. Her mom was going to wake up she just knew it. His stare met hers and it was almost like they were the only ones that mattered in the world. "Come back..."

And then the nerves kicked in. Part of her wondering why on earth she had actually called him back, what was she going to say to him? She didn't even have a clue, but as soon as she knew it Troy was standing right before her. "Yeah?" He whispered sensually, the dim lighting in the room making him so much more desirable than previously. He was always desirable though.

Her mouth opened, she took a deep breath, and no words came out? What. "Oh my god I don't even know..." She ran a stressed hand through her curled hair, and letting out a breath of distress. "God why is this so hard?" She asked herself and then realising that she had actually said that out loud.

"What's hard?" He asked his hand reaching for her and touching her bicep, sparks originating from the touch.

But as soon as the small gesture happened she pulled away and padded around the room in total frustration. With her, with Troy, with the situation. "This!" She exclaimed, her voice still quiet. "Me? You? Us!"

Troy seemed to find this amusing as he chuckled slightly. Oh how she loved his chuckle. God she had to stop this! What was going on? She was going completely crazy! "Gabriella it's us. When has it ever been straight forward?"

She had to be going insane. She didn't even know what was going on. Troy Bolton was here in her bedroom, and she was contemplating what she would say to him. Alot of girls would have killed to have this opportunity. "Okay can we talk..."

"That's what the text said." He joked and then sat down on the bed again, Gabriella following.

"Look I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the way I'm treating you. I'm sorry about everything that happened I'm sorry that we broke up and part of it was my fault. We never talked about this and things were too crazy. And in all honesty? I should never have broken up with you. I was being selfish and hoping that I could try and swim on my own but I drowned. Like literally..." She attempted to joke, rambling in the process.

"Gabriella.." Troy began, placing his large hand on her thigh.

"No I'm not done." She announced, her eyes not even looking at him, they were scanning the room, it was as if the room was a book that contained a script of everything she had ever wanted to say to him and it was just leaking out. "We were together a long time and I was so stupid to just throw it away over something as stupid as not wanting to hold you back. I know I wasn't holding you back, now. You know I wasn't holding you back. And everything with my dad and I thought that I needed to do it alone. But i needed you. I really needed you and I was too stupid to come to you and admit that I needed you're help. I needed you to kiss me and hold me and just tell me everything was okay. At the funeral I needed you, I needed you to hold my hand just so I could feel you're strength there. Even when you started going out with Demi I thought that things would be different, like you would stop being with her for me. For some stupid reason."

"Sto..." he began.

But she wasn't done. "I mean things got so bad I couldn't see and my mind was so delusional. I thought that you were going to break up with her because you'd realise that you loved me, and then I got that little bit of hope at the state championship and then she completely shot me down. I mean you guys had sex and that's a big deal. A big, big deal. Chad told me that. And then when I found out you loved her, the alternate reality that my mind had cooked up completely went into overload and I couldn't handle it. My fault obviously." She was rambling, she could hear that she wasn't breathing, her lungs were burning needed oxygen but she was finally getting it off her chest. "Part of me hated you. Part of me wanted to stab you but the other part of me just wanted to come and find you and say it was okay, and you and I were really over. But then I couldn't, and I did something stupid, totally stupid and it's totally fucked me over for life. I mean if you would have ever told me I was gonna be seeing a shrink and taking tablets to help with my 'mood' then I would have slapped you and told you that you were insane but you're not..."

"Whoa. Gabriella stop." She finally snapped out of her trance, her mocha eyes staring at his azures, and they were leaking concern but also amusement. "You gotta take a breath."

She then closed her eyes and inhaled deeply to compose herself before he began talking.

"Gabriella not all of this is your fault, okay. Yeah maybe we shouldn't have broken up or you shouldn't have broken up with me but I could see that you wanted to get back together but my pride was so fucking dented that I wouldn't admit that I knew you wanted me and you needed me. Demi was totally my fault. Yeah maybe we did have sex but it felt wrong when it wasn't with you. Like I was cheating on you or something. Yeah you've made some pretty bad decisions for example nearly killing yourself. But come on I'm not much better am I?" He stopped talking, his thumb making circular motions on her thigh as she stared at him.

"Oh god." She gasped. "everything's out in the open." Nervous again.

But Troy lightened her mood by chuckling. "Yeah everything's out in the open." His other hand then motioned itself on her forehead and swept any stray tendrils out of her face. "What's going on in your mind?"

"I love you and..."

"Stop." Troy stopped her, and the next thing she knew time immediately skidded to a halt. As his lips slammed up against hers and her eyes shut tightly, savouring every single moment of it. It was as if the whole world had shaken below them as he kissed her with almost everything he had. This had to be a dream didn't it? Stuff like this didn't happen in real life. You're best friend didn't text your ex boyfriend from you're phone and tell them that to come round to talk. The two people didn't end up kissing on her bed did they?

Troy's arms wrapped around her as he kissed her ferociously. Everything had stopped; she had lasted so long without his lips on hers. It was like she was really seeing, like the world wasn't black and white anymore. It had all turned to colour right before her, there was no blur, everything was as clear as day. She felt healed. She felt complete. But even as she savoured every minute and as her hands ran over his body and she remembered the way he felt beneath her touch. The way he was almost trembling. It was as if the whole wait, the whole journey and everything else had been worth it.

He moved his hand up into the tangle of her curls to almost pull her to him even more. It was hard to determine where she began and he ended. She arched her back to be closer to him and he lifted her body so she was on his lap. She could hear his uneven breaths along with her own. But she would have gladly suffocated if it meant that her last minutes could be with him. She was with him, this was everything she had ever wanted, she had needed this and she was partly cursing herself for ever telling him she needed time! Time what the fuck does time do anyway? Apart from complicate things.

"Tell me if you don't want this." Troy panted in between kisses. "If this is too much..."

There was the guy she had fallen in love with. The guy that she had just confessed that she loved to and yet he was willing to stop, just to make sure she was okay. "I'd be lying..." She confessed, passionately trying to pull him closer to her, but every fibre of their skin was touching. The only thing separating was clothes. Which she planned to work on. She ferociously grabbed his white t shirt, pushing it further and further up his torso, and as they broke away for all of two seconds she was finally able to look at his body. The way she remembered it.

His body lightly pushed upon hers as she landed on the soft bed and he hovered over her. She could feel his erection rubbing against the side of her thigh as she split her legs to let him hover over her more. She felt his struggle as he leaned around to pull her pyjama shirt over her head, momentarily breaking the lip lock and she suddenly felt self conscious. She didn't have a bra on as she didn't think she would be seeing anybody and she planned on drinking her coffee and then going straight to sleep.

But Troy immediately dove for her stomach pressing open mouth kisses on it, causing Gabriella to whimper. "I missed you so fucking much...."

She began to feel a raging fire in her core a pulse from deep within. She broke the kiss momentarily again to unbutton the button of his jeans and he laced hands with her to pull them down his legs. Soon enough her pyjama shots had been shed and all that was separating the two of them was her soaked panties and his white boxer shorts. "Troy..." She moaned. "I missed you.." She whispered as she felt something wet against her neck and realised he was placing kisses there probably causing a hickey in the morning, but it didn't matter as long as she was with him.

"You have no fucking idea." She ran her hands up his bare chest and sweat was beginning to coat his golden skin. And he slithered away from her body in order to pull her soaked panties away from her core. She could feel his rock hard erection still rubbing against her thigh, begging to be freed from his boxers. As she began to move to pull his boxers down she inhaled sharply as she felt his finger inside of her.

The ache in her core had suddenly stopped as his fingers pumped inside of her. "Troy..." She moaned, her head thrown back in pure bliss. It had been so long since she had felt this kind of bliss.

"God I want you." He almost chanted as he continued pumping. And Gabriella moans became louder. And she suddenly felt a pull from behind her navel and Troy seemed to know what was coming.

"Just let it go." He whispered before pressing a kiss to her swollen lips.

It wasn't long after that Troy had been stripped of his boxers and the latex condom covered his man hood and he pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Is this okay?"

"More than okay..." She whispered. Troy nodded silently and thrusted himself inside of her. Gabriella felt a sharp stretching pain seeing as in it had been such a long time since she had done this.

"Whoa, are you alright? I mean we can stop?" She knew how hard it would be for him to stop, but she knew he would do it. Despite everything he may have done he still wanted to make sure that she was okay. Troy was already panting and sweat was dripping from his forehead.

"No.. no..." She panted. But as he continued pumping in and out of her she began to arch her back and press her lips to his chest. "Troy..."

"So good..." He chanted. "Gabriella..."

Her eyes were squeezed shut as she partly wondered why she had broken up with him when the sex had been as good as this. "Oh my god..."

"Gabriella...." He began, his eyes tightly closed. "I'm not gonna..."

It was at that moment she leaned up in the darkness and kissed him senselessly, just before she felt the pull behind her navel for the second time that night. "Troy...."

"I know."

Gabriella had lost count of how many times that time had stood still. And then it did again she could hear and feel the blood rush to her ears, as happiness rippled through her at the speed of light.

"GABRIELLA!".

Troy sang her name like it was the last thing he was ever going to say in his life, and then his back gave out on him as he rolled to the side, and she lay there breathless. "I love you too." He finally responded.

"Why did we ever break up?" She half joked with her eyes closed, the sweat was slowly starting to dry on her skin making her feel cold. But then she was surrounded by warmth, one being Troy's arms wrapping securely around her small body. And the other the comforter that had been resting on her bed. And for the first time that night Gabriella finally felt like she could go to sleep.

"Oh I don't know something about holding me back" He responded, and she could tell that sleep was overcoming him too.

And for the first night, in a long string of nights. Gabriella finally found herself falling into a very content sleep.