Maru woke up with a start as his alarm went off. "Bluh," he announced as he sat up in bed and eyed the alarm clock contemplatively. Urge to sleep in... rising. He sighed and rubbed his eyes for a moment before swinging his leg and stump over the side of the bed. "Fuuuuuuuuuuuck." He reached around for his leg and strapped it on lethargically as he looked out the window into the morning darkness.

There's something nice about waking up before dawn. A sort of stark solitude, sublime solace sans sun. He snorted. On the other hand, a little too much solitude is bad for the spirit. He looked down at his hand and stump for a moment. Before, I at least had my parents, even if I kept to myself around them. In the hospital, the doctors and nurses were there, even if all I think I did was annoy them. Here, though, what do I have? A neighbor who I'm pretty sure finds me annoying, the other neighbor's a misogynist, a girl who I think is already becoming annoyed by me... There's also Hanako and Lilly; they seem nice enough, but doubtless they'll become annoyed in time too, and frankly Hanako seems like she'd probably prefer to just be left alone anyway...

He reached over into the pocket of his school shirt and pulled out his folding knife. With practiced ease, he flicked it open with his thumb and looked at the blade. It had been serrated once, before he had worked it over with his rotary, some sandpaper, and a whetstone. The edge still had a slight bluish tint from where he had normalized it with his blowtorch.

He pinched the hilt between his thumb and middle finger, and let the weight of the knife pull it down into a stabbing grip. He pinched it again and flicked his wrist, bringing the knife back into a standard grip. He did this a few more times, trying to clear his head, before he thumbed the blade release and pushed it against his chest to close it. Dammit.

He put the knife back in his shirt pocket, rested his elbow on his knee and let his head sink onto his palm. Shit. It's way too fuckin' early in the day to be having these sorts of thoughts. I'd better start doing something distracting. He stood up and stretched. Exercises are already on the plate anyway, let's get started.

He went through his morning routine and walked down to the gym. As he walked, he started to think again. You know, I don't even know why I'm bothered, really. You'd think I'd be used to this, considering. Still, can't help but feel a little shunned... Oh well. Put on a happy face, fuck the world.

The better part of an hour later, he stepped out of the gym, tired, sore, but in a better state of mind than he had started the morning out in. As he walked down the hall to his dorm, Hisao's door opened. Maru greeted him and suggested his idea from the night before, and watched for a moment as Hisao walked past him.

I guess I'll take that as a "no," he thought with a shrug. That's a pity, I could really use an exercise buddy. He turned to go to the bathroom when he heard the clicking of locks. He raised an eyebrow as Kenji's door opened, and the bespectacled lad himself walked out and tapped on Hisao's door.

"He's not in," Maru said.

"Oh?" Kenji turned and frowned at Maru. "How would you know? Oh wait, maybe it's because you're really a psychic spy?"

"...Or I saw him leave?" Maru rolled his eyes. "And I thought we went over the whole psychic spy stuff already."

"Yeah, about that, I got to thinking about it, and realized that if the feminists really wanted to throw a wrench into the works, they might find a way to get around tin foil for the sake of spying," Kenji said. "Tin's not very dense after all, so maybe if they just upped the wattage it would go straight through."

Speaking of dense things, Maru thought. "So-"

"And then I thought—Wait." Kenji paused. "Why am I telling this to you? You're the spy!"

Do I really have time for this bullshit? ...On the other hand, fucking with his head might be amusing. Of course, that's how we ended up here, so maybe not. Maru shook his head. "Whatever, man. I'm going to go take a shower." He paused. "Oh, you want me to leave a message for Hisao when he gets back?"

"Oh yeah, as if I'm going to discuss my super-sensitive plans with a psychic spy," Kenji said. "You're not too clever are you?"

Taste logic, not that I suspect it'll do any good! Maru shook his head. "If I were a psychic spy, wouldn't I already know your plans?"

Kenji started rubbing the end of his scarf furiously. "Damn, you're right. What was I thinking?" He shrugged. "Well since you know my plan, can you give me the 4000 yen I need?"

"Uh." Maru raised an eyebrow. "That's a lot of money."

"Well how about 400 yen then?" Kenji nodded. "That should be enough."

...By a factor of ten? Is this some sort of weird haggling attempt? Maru blinked. "...Yeah, sure."

"Thanks," said Kenji. "Maybe you really aren't a spy."

"No Kenji, no I'm not," Maru sighed out. "Can I ask what you're going to do with the money?"

Kenji frowned. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

"...Yes, yes I would." Maru sighed again. "That's why I asked."

"Oh." Kenji shrugged. "I want to order a pizza, and I already have most of the cost of the pizza. I need your help for the rest."

"Ah." Maru nodded. "Well, can I have a slice of it?"

"No," Kenji replied bluntly.

Maru's eye twitched. "...That's cold, man."

"I would give you some, but you have class, you don't have time to eat a pizza," Kenji noted.

Maru considered this for a moment. "Well, you do have me there I guess."

"So will you give me some money?" Kenji smiled.

"I already said I would." Maru paused. "Wait, why did you say 4000 yen at first?"

"Because you're a feminist spy and I was trying to get as much as I could from the feminist war chest," Kenji replied.

Said completely without guile, Maru thought. I'm sort of impressed. "Kenji, you're something else, you realize that right?"

"I'm the last sane man in an insane world," Kenji remarked. "Of course I realize that. I-"

"Kenji!" Maru smacked the wall.

Kenji jumped at the sound and looked around, terrified expression on his face. "...We're under attack! The feminists finally started it!"

"That was me smacking the wall actually," Maru observed. "You want some money, right?"

"Huh?" Kenji frowned, then smiled. "Yeah. I'll pay you back, I swear."

"If you'll do me a favor and never bring up feminists with me, you can just have the money," Maru said.

Kenji paused, opened his mouth, then shut it again. "Deal. But-"

"No buts," Maru said. "Let me just get the money."

"You know, you're alright," Kenji said. "Even if you're in denial."

Maru sighed as he went into his room. He came back with 4 100 yen coins. "Here."

Kenji took them from him and smiled. "I'll put this money to good use."

"Kenji..." Maru put his prosthetic on his shoulder. "Have you considered getting professional help?"

Kenji paused, then shook his head. "No, we can't rely on that. Too many of the... them have infiltrated to the highest level. It would just tip my hand too early."

"...That's not the kind of help I was thinking," Maru replied as he pinched the bridge of his nose. "I was more thinking like a therapist."

"A therapist?!" Kenji snarled. "Do you know how many feminists are therapists?! That field is a cover of the feminist movement! It was created by feminists to brainwash poor men into being slaves!"

"I think I want my money back," Maru said with a raised eyebrow.

"I went to a therapist once, and for a while I started to think that maybe I was blowing things out of proportion," Kenji continued, unfazed. "That's how I knew they were trying to brainwash me. So I acted like they had convinced me, and eventually my dad told me I didn't have to go anymore."

"That's..." Maru realized he really didn't have anything to say to that.

"Now I'm like the theme song for that one foreign cop show," Kenji said with a smirk.

Maru rubbed his temples. "Yeah..."

"I'll blow the cover off the whole conspiracy, and then everyone will see how we've been taken for fools," Kenji said. "Now then. The time has come."

"...Yeah." Maru paused. "I still think I want my money back."

"I thought you said I could have it!" Kenji frowned.

"On the condition that you didn't mention feminists again," Maru observed.

"Oh." Kenji shrugged. "I'll pay you back later."

"...Whatever," Maru said. I think it may be worth it just to end this conversation. "I should go now."

Kenji nodded. "I can pay you back in stuff, right?"

Maru shrugged. "Whatever suits you." He walked into his room for a change of clothes. He heard the clicking of locks behind him as he did so, and sighed. Well, that happened. He shrugged and went to take a shower.

IT KEEPS HAPPENING

I mean, surprise! Two updates! Of course, this is one of those good news, bad news situations; good news, two updates! Bad news (or maybe better news, depending), I won't be updating next week. Busy week next week. Decided to do two updates rather than leave you with a mostly canon chapter to end things on. So hey!

WarbirdHD, I'm glad you liked the chapter! I try my best to get some lulz. As to thinking levels, well... Maru can be introspective sometimes. It's just that his introspection usually tends to be as cheesy as his extrospection. Mmm, neologism. leeroc101, I think a lot of this story can be summed up with "it's Maru,' really. XD Anyway, I still think you're right about the relaxation scene; but I'm also lazy and busy, and haven't gotten around to it. Lazy author is lazy. Jakker-san, I'm glad you're liking things so far, and I will say that it's all in the works. ;)