I don't own Twilight, but do own tickets to go see ZZ Top tonight! WOOH!

"I don't ever wanna feel like I did that day. Take me to the place I love, take me all the way." Under The Bridge, Red Hot Chili Peppers

"We need to talk," Alice said calmly.

"I haven't fucking done anything!" Edward yelled, glaring at his brother. Jasper's grip tightened around Emmett's arms when he tried to pull away from him again.

Coming out of the shock that had left me standing there staring at the four of them, I moved toward Edward. The blood on his shirt made me gag but I swallowed back the bile. Ignoring Emmett's stream of profanities, I tentatively held Edward's arm.

Once his brother's eyes focused on me, the anger started all over again. Emmett's voice roared above Alice's as he pulled away from Jasper.

"What about what you did to her, Edward? How the fuck do you think this makes Bella feel?"

I cringed away from his monstrous voice but stayed between the two of them, in front of Edward and holding on to his arm, as if it might keep him from fighting with his brother again. I hated the fact that my mind automatically assumed the worst and as Edward's other arm pulled me back against him, I tried to ignore the doubts that were making my body shake. Edward hadn't used in over three years. We lived together and if he was doing that shit again, certainly I would know about it. Wouldn't I?

"I don't even know what the fuck you're talking about, Emmett! You come in here throwing me up against the wall without explaining anything!" Edward yelled back. I tightened my grip on his arm.

"Both of you knock it the fuck off!" Jasper screamed over both of them. "If you'll stop acting like a bunch of assholes and let Alice explain then maybe we could get past the fucking testosterone driven fist fights!"

"Explain what?" Edward stared at Alice. "What the hell did I fuck up now?"

Alice held up a plain CD case and shook her head. "FedEx delivered this today."

Edward and I looked at the CD then back to her. "What is it?" I asked quietly. His arm tightened around my body as we waited for Alice to explain.

"The CD we made in LA." Alice sighed before continuing. "Someone got a copy of it and its all over TMZ and Perez Hilton. A few radio stations are playing clips of it."

Relief was the first thing I felt, mainly because I had honestly believed that it might have been the recording we had made a few weeks ago. And that was not something I wanted the rest of the world to hear. But then I remembered what all had been on the CD from LA. The songs weren't bad, even if it was embarrassing to once again have my voice thrown all over the internet, but there had been some pretty private moments recorded; Edward and I talking about my damn insecurities and Emmett and Rosalie telling us that they were having a baby.

"I didn't…" Edward said quietly. "I only made two copies of that CD and both of them are sitting on a shelf at our house in Austin!"

Emmett's anger boiled over again. "I don't give a shit how many copies you made! I don't care where the fuck they are! What I do care about is the fact that my wife is freaking the hell out because millions of people now know that we're having a baby!"

"Stop," Jasper warned, grabbing the back of Emmett's shirt.

"I told you, Edward. I fucking told you that you had to be careful! I admitted to tripping on acid on that fucking CD! Do you think my boss is going to be happy about that? Or Rosalie's family? Hell Edward, what the fuck do you think Mom and Dad are going to say?"

Edward shook his head. "Em, I didn't… I wouldn't ever do this on purpose!"

"I guess it shouldn't matter, right? What's another drug using son? At least I knew enough to stop myself before turning into a fucking addict!"

"No!" I screamed, grabbing Edward's arm as he pushed me aside.

Jasper wrapped both of his arms around Emmett's chest and started pulling him backwards. I scrambled around the broken coffee table and stood between them, pushing Edward backward.

"STOP!" Alice screamed. "THIS ISN'T HELPING ANYTHING!"

"I wouldn't hurt my family on purpose, Emmett! You know that! And fuck you for coming in here throwing that shit around! You know I don't use anymore!"

"Please stop," I pleaded.

Edward's chest heaved under my hands. I gently slid my hands up to his neck and pulled his head down to look at me. His eyes were full of furry and remorse, making my heart ache. Edward's jaw tightened before he took a deep breath and looked back at his brother.

"If something happens," Emmett warned. His voice shook from the effort it took to control his anger. "If anything happens to Rosalie or my kid, I will make you will regret it. We didn't sign up for this celebrity bullshit, Edward. And I will be damned if my family will be pulled into it just because you were too fucking stupid to not cover your ass!"

I flinched when he shoved Jasper off of him and stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him. Alice shook her head before turning to Edward.

"The label is having their attorneys look into forcing the recordings being pulled but I seriously doubt it will do any good. We can either release a statement or ignore it."

"Ignore it," Edward said. His voice was cold and detached. "Tell the hotel I'll pay for the damages."

We watched as he stepped over the broken furniture and disappeared into the bedroom, shutting the door behind him. Wrapping my arms around myself, I stared at the closed door.

"Should I try to rearrange your flight?" Alice asked softly.

I shook my head. "I'll take care of it."

Leaving Alice and Jasper standing there, I followed Edward into the bedroom, shutting the door behind me just like he had. I leaned against it, hating how familiar it was to see him sitting on the floor looking like the entire world sat on his shoulders. I closed my eyes and reminded myself that he wasn't the same Edward from years before.

After wetting a washcloth in the bathroom, I sat in front of him. He continued to stare at the floor, only flinching when I gently wiped away the dried blood on his face. We didn't speak for several minutes.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly.

Shaking my head, I carefully held the cold rag against a bruise forming on his jaw. "You didn't do anything wrong, Edward."

"My brother hates me," he muttered.

"He doesn't hate you. He's upset and being overprotective because of the baby and Rosalie. You know he didn't mean what he said, Edward. Emmett is hotheaded and gets out of control when he's mad about something. He loves you."

I watched as he pushed himself off of the floor, leaving me sitting there. He threw the suitcase onto the bed and started pulling clothes out of it.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

Edward pulled his shirt over his head before throwing it in the trashcan. "I'm going to take a shower before we have to leave for the airport."

"We can stay if you want."

He shook his head. "I want to leave."

I nodded as he walked into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Looking down at the blood covered rag in my hand, I felt ill. It wasn't because of the stains that covered the white cloth, but the sense of impending fear that had settled in my chest.

~TG~TG~TG~TG~

The flight back to Texas was horrible. Edward sat in his seat staring straight ahead, not talking to anyone. His sunglasses covered most of the bruise under his eye but the one on his jaw was only getting worse.

I wanted to comfort him, to make him realize that we would be fine, but anytime I tried to touch him he would just move away from me. After two hours of being pushed away, I left him alone.

By the time we walked through our front door, both of us were beyond irritated. Maybe it was a little selfish for me to be mad at him for basically shutting down, especially since that had my method of coping for years, but it wasn't like this didn't affect me either. I didn't expect him to hold me and promise me that everything would be fine, but I would have appreciated anything other than the one word answers he kept giving me.

I was setting my purse on the couch when the front door slammed behind Edward. I jumped from the noise but remained silent as he stormed through the house. Ignoring the stream of profanities that followed behind him, I took a deep breath and tried to calm down. But when there was a loud crashing sound coming from the office, I couldn't just stand there.

I watched from the doorway as Edward dumped row after row of CDs onto the floor. His feet stepped on them as he moved across the room, snapping most of them into pieces.

"What are you doing?" My voice was calm, even if I wasn't.

"Two copies of that CD were in this room when we fucking left! I know for a fact that I didn't leave a copy at the recording studio! So the only other explanation is that one of the ones from this house is the one that was leaked!" he screamed at me.

I stared at him, feeling like I'd been punched in the chest. "You really think that I would do that?" I asked him. "You think that I would do that to you? To your family?"

Edward shook his head. "Not you."

"Then who the hell else? Alice and Jasper?" I yelled at his back. "Jesus, Edward you can't stop trusting your closest friends!"

He threw down the stack of CDs that he'd been holding and glared at me. "I'm not worried about my friends, Bella."

I shook my head but he ignored me.

"What the fuck do you really know about him?" Edward continued yelling. "What do you know about any of them?"

"When the hell would Garrett have been over here to get the CD? He can't get in here unless one of us lets him in and when he has been here, he's never been alone!"

"Then where is your fucking copy of the CD?" Edward's voice thundered around the room. "God, you can be so fucking naive!"

I stepped over the mess of broken plastic and pulled my copy out of the row where I had put it. After throwing it at him I shook my head. "Before you start blaming me or my friends for things that we didn't do, you should make sure to know what the fuck you're talking about!"

Edward ignored me and pulled the CD out of its case before putting it into the CD player. I watched him as all of our voices spoke through the speaker. After listening for a second, he pulled my copy out and put his in. It was the same thing.

"Garrett didn't steal my copy, Edward. Neither did anyone else from the store. None of them even knew anything about it! So unless you want to stand there and tell me that he somehow managed to get in here and listen to every fucking CD that we have, just to find that one, then I suggest you find another scapegoat!"

He stared at me for a second before looking down at the CDs that he had in his hand. "I don't trust him, Bella," Edward said slowly.

"I didn't trust Jane!" I said bitterly. "I told you from the first day I fucking met her, Aro, and the rest of them that they were bad for you! I also said that about James and Katie! You chose to ignore my opinions and do what ever the fuck you wanted! So tell me Edward, which one of us has the best track record of accurate judgment?"

"Why the hell do all of you keep throwing that in my face?" Edward threw the CDs against the wall before taking a step towards me. "I fucked up, okay? I was a drug addict and an asshole! I took advantage of my fucking best friend and made her hate me! I spent two years in a damn relationship with someone who royally fucked my life up! Is that what you want to hear, Bella? Do you need to hear me say you were right? How many times do I have to apologize before you realize that I'm not fucking perfect?"

"I have forgiven you, Edward."

He shook his head, staring at the floor between us. I took a step closer to him and leaned my head down, trying to get him to look at me. He reluctantly raised his eyes to meet mine.

"We can't fight against each other. If we don't trust each other then how are we going to make a relationship work?" I quietly asked him.

Edward's hands reached out for mine. "I do trust you."

"No," I whispered. "You don't. If you did, then you would trust my judgment. I wouldn't ever let someone in here if I had an ounce of doubt that they weren't trustworthy. I wouldn't do that to you."

He didn't say anything, just watched my face before pulling me towards him. As his arms wrapped around my shoulders, I held on to his sides and pressed my face against his chest.

"I'm just…" Edward sighed. "I'm so tired and shouldn't have taken any of this out on you. I'm sorry."

"It's okay," I kissed the middle of his chest. "Maybe you should call your brother. You've both had a chance to calm down and you know he didn't mean what he said, Edward."

"I know," he agreed.

After I carefully kissed the bruise on his jaw, I handed Edward the phone. He grumbled something before dialing Emmett's number and walking back into the living room.

I only halfheartedly eavesdropped on their conversation while unpacking our stuff, but by the time they'd hung up it seemed like things were semi-resolved. I was in the middle of separating out laundry when Edward joined me in the bedroom. He was sprawled across the bed, watching as I threw clothes into different piles.

"Does your face hurt?" I asked him. He shook his head, but I knew he was lying. "Do you want some Tylenol?"

"No, I'm fine."

I threw the last pair of jeans into the stack before walking to the bed. My fingers wove through Edward's hair and my nails scratched against his scalp gently. I smiled when his eyes closed.

"There's nothing you want to make you feel better?"

"Just you," he answered. His hands pulled me down onto the bed next to him. I curled into his side, resting my head against his arm. It didn't take long for both of us to fall asleep on top of the covers.

~TG~TG~TG~TG~

My knees bounced up and down from pent up nervousness as I stared at the painting on the wall opposite me. I suppose it was meant to be calming, with its muted colors and countryside landscape, but the longer I looked at it the more anxious I became. It wasn't the painting, I knew that, but I kept asking myself if I was making the right decision.

I hadn't talk to Edward about this or even Jasper or Alice. In fact, my decision to see a therapist hadn't been discussed with anyone. It was a choice that I'd made before we had even left Seattle and had only been more solidified once we got back.

Edward had had a drug problem and he knew it. Regardless of the reasons that lead him to rehab, it had been his determination that helped him overcome his past. He had set aside his insecurities and fears and done what he had to do. Even if we weren't together at the time, I knew that I was part of the reason he had gone. He had bettered himself for me and I owed him the same dedication. There was something wrong with me, and I had to stop pretending I could fix it by myself.

A door to the right of me opened and I watched as a woman around my age made her way into the room. Her arms were full of spiral notebooks, her purse, and two cups of coffee. She smiled warmly when the door closed behind her.

"Bella?" she asked, dumping the books on her desk. I nodded and took her hand when she offered it to me. "I'm Doctor Afton. It's nice to meet you."

"You too," I said quietly.

She grabbed one of the notebooks, a pen, and a cup of coffee before settling into the chair across from mine. Flipping the book open, she clicked her pen and looked up at me.

"So, what can I help you with?"

I pulled at the fabric of my shirt and shrugged my shoulders. "I… think there is something wrong with me. Actually, I know there is. I just don't know how to fix it… or make it stop."

Dr. Afton nodded her head. "When you say something's wrong with you, what do you mean?"

"I..." My head shook as I tried to think of a way to explain things to her. "I don't like… people."

"As in you're violent? Or you just don't like people in general?"

I couldn't help but laugh. "No, I don't like being around people I don't know."

Her hand moved across the paper. "Have you always had these types of feelings?" I shook my head. "When did you start noticing that you felt that way?"

This was the moment I'd been dreading. I took a deep breath and looked at her. "My boyfriend is Edward Cullen," I said quietly.

Her eyes widened for a second before she nodded for me to continue.

I shifted in my seat. "We…were friends for a really long time, before he became a big musician, and a few years ago the two of us did something really, really stupid. To make a long story short, we didn't talk for nearly three years. And during that time I pretty much cut myself off from everyone and everything I'd known."

"Self isolation," Dr. Afton said.

Nodding my head, I continued. "Well, we ended up reconnecting and now were living together and I'm really happy with Edward."

"But?" she prompted.

"But, I wasn't really ready to deal with screaming fans and paparazzi. I didn't realize that because we are in a relationship together that I would become a celebrity, too."

"Is this something that you've discussed with Edward?"

I nodded. "He keeps telling me that I'll be okay, that he won't let anything happen to me. I believe him and it isn't that I'm worried about someone shanking me or anything…"

Dr. Afton laughed lightly.

Smiling, I shrugged my shoulders. "I just don't… I don't like the feeling of other people, strangers, having any insight into our relationship. It's something that we literally went to hell and back for… I don't want to share it with every single fan that he has."

"Bella, would you say that this 'dislike of people' that you have is fearful or more of a protective instinct?"

"It scares me," I admitted. "It scares me to be in a situation that I don't know anything about, especially when large crowds are involved. But then I also hate the feeling of not having any control over what people will say or do."

"Well," she sat up in chair and smiled. "I think you have every right to want to protect your relationship. That's a natural instinct. But, if it is bordering on a social disorder then you might need to find ways to channel that anxious energy."

Dr. Afton folded her hands in her lap and leaned her head to one side.

"I'm going to be honest with you, Bella. From what you've told me, the biggest issue I think you might have is the fact that you don't really know how to handle situations that you aren't comfortable with. On your admit form you said, 'I felt like the only choices I had were to panic or run away'. That isn't healthy."

"I know," I admitted. "Which is why I'm here."

"And that's the first step. As cliché as it sounds, it's the truth." She said kindly. "You can't fix anything if you don't admit there is a problem. If you're willing to work through your feelings and really get to root of your anxiety, then I believe that you can find a healthier way to deal with these issues. And in turn, live a happier life being better equipped to deal with social settings that you normally wouldn't be comfortable in."

When I nodded, she leaned back in her chair and picked up her notebook again. With her pen ready to start writing she looked up at me. "So, tell me about your history with Edward."

Where do I freaking start?

A/N Ok… what did you guys think was going to happen? I have to say a huge thanks to Maggie, Trin and Mollydamnit who have preread and beta'd three chapters in three days! Love you girls! Miss Ally, I hope you feel better soon!