Crazy trouble with love part 3
Princess Iron Fan and Jackie
Series: Jackie Chan Adventures
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-Netherworld-
The eight demons were floating on the rocks aimlessly, as usual, with Shendu not being that attacked by his siblings since they already did that before and it quickly got old.
"Shendu." Bai Tza growled. "You are a fucking idiot! You with your stupid plans!"
"I agree." Tchang Zu growled. "He was done nothing but sent us back into this prison!"
"I know that!" he snapped. "You've said that ever since the portal closed! If we're trapped here for eternity, at least come up with something else!"
"Here's an idea." Po Kong said. "Let me eat you!"
"Or better yet." Dai Gui frowned. "We use him as target practice."
Just then a massive wind hit the area as massive flames licked the sky until it looked like a burning hellscape.
"W-What the? What's happening?!" cried Hsi Wu flying away from the flames.
"I don't know!" Tso Lan yelled.
"CHILDREN!" Yelled a feminine voice full of rage and hate that boomed like a hurricane over a volcano. "YOU ARE DEAD!"
"It's-" started Dai Gui.
"MOTHER!" cried Shendu as all of them looked down the void.
From the void came a large dragon like creature with six legs, massive phoenix wings, several red eyes, tentacles around its dragon head, large curved horns, spines down its back with a large double sided tail with a iron fan like blades. The symbols of fire, sky, water, mountain, earth, wind, thunder and moon surrounded it's body as massive claws of pure fire grabbed the rocks around it. It was much bigger than Shendu's physical form but more slim then Po Kong's body.
It growled before flapping its wings and tails as another gust of wind and fire coated the area with extremely hot winds of death.
"Ah! Hot hot hot!" cried Hsi Wu as all of them felt like flame was being blown right all over them.
"YOU!" It growled as more flames lit the area. "You fucking idiots!"
"G-Greetings mother." spoke Bai Tza nervously. "Had we known you were coming, we would have….prepared something for you."
"Shut up!" She growled. "I have been here for ten centuries after that accursed Monkey King sealed me away."
"And that's a misfortune." Tso Lan gulped. "But why grace us with your presence?"
She glared. "To punish you for breaking your father's oath!" She looked at them with hate. "For not only messing with human affairs BUT GETTING SEALED IN THIS WORLD!"
"B-B-B-But mother! It's not like that." spoke Xiao Feng with a gulp.
"Yes it was! You ruled the world yes but," she sent a blast of hot flames at them. "You try to challenge the mortals! And after that whole Xuanzang incident and WHEN that accursed Monkey King killed your father and oldest brother Red Boy, you still TRIED TO CONQUER THEM!"
"But mother, we have so much more power than them! And when we tasted even the smallest bit of freedom, we saw how much the humans had progressed. They barely made us flinch, except for…" spoke Tchang Zu.
"Except for who?" She demanded.
"That chi wizard." spoke Hsi Wu with a frown. "If it wasn't for him, we would have been free to reclaim our kingdoms."
She darkly laughed at that. "A chi wizard! HAH! I faced against a demigod turned immortal that faced demons, gods, the rulers of hell, AND men. A chi wizard is nothing compared to him, and Shendu." She turned to the spirit. "What happened to your body, the last time I heard from the world, YOU stole the sacred powers of the zodiac!"
He gulped remembering that incident and how much his mother hated missing with the natural order. "Well, I had my powers, but….they were…..taken."
She moved her head closer to the spirit as flames came from her mouth. "By who?!"
He gulped. "Jackie Chan."
"...and what sort of monk or warrior is this Jackie Chan?" She growled while looking at her children. "Tell me WHO this Jackie Chan is!"
"He is that tasty morsel who's stopped all of us from being free." spoke Po Kong. "And I was this close to devouring him too."
"But he's skilled in martial arts." Tchang Zu said.
She looked intrigued. "So this human defeated you with martial arts….HAHAHA!" She laughed as more wind and flames licked the sky and burned the stones to liquid rock. "That's ridiculous! One man? Hahahahaha! You children know how to make me laugh!"
"We aren't joking mother." Bai Tza gulped.
She stopped laughing an grew a dark look on her face. "You're telling me that you, the most dangerous demons second to Red Boy, were defeated by a simple human." She growled as the heat increased to boiling temperatures. "You all are FAILURES IN MY EYES!"
All of them panicked with the demons jumping on the rocks they were on with His Wu and Shendy more lucky.
"I WILL SHOW YOU THE POWER OF YOUR MOTHER!" She roared in rage. "AND I HEREBY DISOWN YOU ALL!"
"But mother!" they all cried out with wide eyes.
"I AM NOT YOUR MOTHER ANYMORE!" She yelled before sending large gusts of fire at them as they were sent flying deeper into the void. "AND IF I SEE YOU EVER AGAIN I WILL CONSUME YOU ALL!"
All of them cried out before it slowly died out due to the distance.
She growled in anger before looking into the void. 'They don't deserve to be my children. They disobey my late husband's wishes and get defeated by humans! They are nothing to me!' she flew off while narrowing her eyes. "I'll use my reserves of magic and exit this accursed world!"
She raised her arms before sending a black flame at the void as a large green gate with the Chinese symbol for death appeared. She dove into it before it closed behind her.
-San Francisco, near Uncle's shop-
"Uncle? Where do you need this collection of chinese cups?" asked Jackie holding a box in his arms.
"Right near the table." Uncle said while making a potion. "Now don't interrupt Uncle!"
"AAHH!" Jade screamed while running into the room. "JACKIE!"
"BYA!" he jumped and nearly dropped the box before Jade tripped and hit the table.
"Jackie! There's a strange lady in my room!" Jade said in fear.
"Huh?"
"It was a lady, but not a lady! She just appeared out of a green gate and changed!"
"Green gate?" Jackie put the box down and rubbed his chin. "The only gates that link up with that would be….the demon ones! But, that can't be. All eight portals were closed for good."
As he said this a woman with black, red, and yellow robes that reached her legs and hands, a dark pink ribbon around her arms and circled her back, long black hair tied on the top with a green ribbon with gold hair pieces between her bun, with a gold jade necklace, red eyes and holding a large green fan with two circles in the center, walked in.
"So this is what the humans have been doing, it makes me laugh how they progress this far." She grinned.
Uncle blinked and adjusted his glasses before going wide eyed. "Aiyahhh! Jackie! Take Jade into the back at once!"
"Why Uncle?"
"Do not question Uncle!" he spoke while ushering them to the back while smiling at the woman. "Excuse my nephew, he does not know how to show proper respect. Can I get you some nice fresh tea?"
"No thanks." She said. "I'm here to find Jackie Chan. Do you know where he is?"
"No, Uncle has never heard of him. I believe you can find him in next town over."
She looked at him. "Sorry human but I'm not falling for something like that. Especially after being sealed by that Monkey King."
His eyes widened and broke into a nervous sweat. "I see, can you excuse Uncle for one second."
"Yes but do hurry, I have much to do after ten centuries." She said while looking around. 'Chi ingredients, such a waste of energy.'
Uncle walked into the backroom and panicked. "Jackie, you must get far away from shop. Go anywhere, but whatever you do, you must keep going."
"But why? She's just a demon."
Wack!
"This is no normal demon! That's Princess Iron Fan! The demon that fought the Monkey King and had NINE demon children! The first was Red Boy, then you know the other eight!" Uncle yelled while slapping Jackie's head. "And don't question Uncle!"
"Ow!" he rubbed his head. "Sorry, but can't we cast a chi spell? Isn't there a symbol to help banish her to where the others are?"
"No there's isn't! She was sealed by the Monkey King! And she has a fan that can create humongous gales and fire storms! Only an insane idiot would try fighting her!"
"So in short, we're screwed?" asked Jade.
"Yes." Uncle said before hearing footsteps.
"Ok human, you're one second is long overdue. Tell me where Jackie Chan is or I will burn this place to the ground!" Yelled Princess Iron Fan while walking towards Uncle's location.
"Think Jackie can make it far through the window?" gulped Jade pointing to said window.
"I don't know Jade." Jackie gulped. "But it's worth a shot."
"Human!" Princess Iron Fan yelled. "Come out or burn to death!"
"On second thought." Jackie stepped back and ran at the door before kicking it down, causing it to go flying and hit the demon in the face before he jumped off it and used her as a springboard and ran to the door and out to the street.
"You….." She growled while the dirt burned. "You will PAY!" She then ran out of the shop and ran after Jackie as flames and wind covered her body.
"Anything we should do?" Jade asked.
"No but." Uncle said while running to the kitchen. "Help Uncle with the burning door!"
Jackie panted and saw the demon flying after him with lightning in her hands.
"You will pay!" She yelled before shooting the lightning at Jackie. "WITH YOUR LIFE!" She then used her fan and swung it as a gust of flaming wind mixed with debris flew towards him.
"Ah! Bad day bad day!" he cried before spotting a car and ducked behind it before the attack missed. "Why are you attacking me!"
"For attacking my head with a door!" She growled. "And for making me disown my bastard children you little fuck!"
His eyes widened and ducked from a fireball. "But they were trying to take over the world! I had to!"
"Yet they were SUPPOSED to not meddle with human affairs!"she growled. "They disobeyed my late husband's dying wish and got defeated by you! You, a simple human what has no powers! I may have been defeated by the Monkey King but you," she raised her fan in the air. "Are a simple LOWLY HUMAN!" She sent a tornado of fire at Jackie.
He ran while the car was hit and exploded from the flames. "REALLY bad day!"
Princess Iron Fan groaned while causing the earth to break apart. "I will kill you and make sure YOU will never enter the afterlife! For I will burn your soul!"
'She's serious!' he thought while trying to keep from falling over.
She used her fan to send the car flying at Jackie. "You are nothing. Even that accursed monkey and his master had more spark then you Jackie Chan!"
"Can't we talk this over!" he called by before running down an alleyway.
"How about I kill you." She growled while moving closer to Jackie. "Then I will talk to your charred corpse!"
Jackie gulped and saw he was backed up and took a fighting stance.
"So you wish to fight me?" She frowned. "How stupid. I can kill you before you can even punc-"
CRACK!
She stumbled back as Jackie punched her in the face causing her nose to bleed. "...you."
"I normally don't like fighting women, but right now I know this is a serious fight, so I won't hold back."
Princess Iron Fan growled in rage before punching Jackie in the ribs and sending him flying into a wall. "You will pay for hurting me human!"
He grunted from the impact and saw her coming closer before he ran and started running between the walls to get up and made it to the roof.
She looked up before punching the building with her hand as the building shook and started crashing down.
"Waaah!" Jackie cried jumping on the rubble and saw her glaring at him. "Heh, hello."
She growled before grabbing his neck. "You have made a great enemy today Jackie Chan. And I will end you right here RIGHT NOW!"
"GAH!" he choked out while trying to pull her arm off his neck.
"What are your last words human?" She asked with hate.
"D-Don't kill me! I have to take care of Jade!"
She looked at him confused. "You want to protect a stone?"
"No. My...niece."
Princess Iron Fan looked at his eyes and saw the same eyes she had when her first son Red Boy died. The need to protect. "...you seem noble." She said while letting him go. "And that's enough to tell me that you are something more then these weak humans."
Jackie coughed and rubbed his neck. "Thanks, but...even still, why are you letting me go? Aren't you going to end me?"
"I would have if you didn't have the same eyes as me when I faced the Monkey King in battle." She said. "I lost Red Boy to him so I engaged him in battle and lost. That is why I spared your life human."
"To be honest, the Monkey King doesn't look that intimidating when we faced him." he remarked standing up.
She raised an eyebrow. "Then you saw his false form. His real form is a monkey with a gold bo staff and he was strong enough to battle demons, humans, gods, and the rulers of hell. That was the one that killed my husband Bull King and my son."
"Oh, I am so sorry." he bowed. "I didn't mean to offend you."
"At least some humans have manners." She said. "But you didn't kill them, but you did do me a favor."
Jackie looked confused as she continued.
"You allowed me to disown my own children. They were supposed to stay away from humans but they didn't listen. Especially Shendu when he stole the zodiac powers from the immortals."
"So….what will you do now then?"
Princess Iron Fan sighed. "I'm going to stay in this realm for a while. Take in the progression of humans and see if I can punch that monkey in the face." She grinned at the last part. "Maybe find a new husband and raise more children, well behaved ones."
"Well, as long as no one gets hurt, I wish you the best of luck." he smiled extending his hand.
"...what are you doing?"
"Oh! This is for two people to shake hands. It's a sign of understanding and respect."
"I see." She said while taking his hand. "Then let's start over, I'm Princess Iron Fan. Evil demon queen of flames and wind."
"I am Jackie Chan, archeologist and you could say ex-demon fighter." he smiled while shaking her hand.
"Archeologist….is that like a scholar?"
"No, it's a job involving researching lost civilizations."
"Oh, that's a good occupation." She said before looking at him. "You know, looking at you more closely, you are handsome."
"Heh, why thank you." he smiled with a blush.
"You're welcome." Princess Iron Fan smiled. "But with all do respect, I'm taking a shine to you Jackie Chan."
"And I to you Princess."
She smiled. "Maybe you can court me. I mean you did survive my rage so that's proof that you're worthy of courting me."
He blushed and sputtered hearing that.
"So." She said while extending her hand. "Care to court me Jackie Chan?"
"C-Court? But we just met."
"Yes, but that's how courting works. Always on the first try." She smiled. "Plus I do mean it when I took a shine for you."
"Um, I'm flattered really, but maybe that's rushing it, a bit."
She frowned. "If it meant by having intercourse you're sadly mistaken. What I meant was to 'date' I think that was the right term."
"Oh! Well I thought you meant….marriage."
"Courting is like flirting." Princess Iron Fan frowned. "I'm not one for being a whore and just marrying the first person I see."
"I didn't mean to sound rude."
"I know, which is why I ask again." She said extending her hand. "Care to court me Jackie Chan?"
"Um, well…."
"Yes he would!" called Jade popping up behind Jackie.
"Oh." She said while Jackie jumped. "It's the human that screamed like a bat out of hell."
"No, I'm his niece." she raised an eyebrow. "And he'd love nothing better to then take you out on a date."
She chuckled. "Well then I will just say this to Jackie." She leaned in and whispered. "When we get to better know each other, you will have to make love in my human form and demon form."
He blushed while she kissed his cheek before she was covered in flames and became her demon form.
"Isn't my demon form powerful?" She said in a booming voice. "And alluring?"
"Yes." he responded with a bigger blush.
Jade looked at him in shock. "Huh? Jackie, she's bigger than Shendu! How is that attractive?!"
"You'll understand when you're older." he replied while she flew off. "And just how did you catch up to us?"
"I kind of….chased after you with a skateboard with the Rabbit talisman."
"Jade." He frowned. "Why did you take that talisman from Sector 13?"
"Because it was to make sure their security was up to date?" she smiled.
"Go return it."
"Aw. But it's a coo-"
"Now Jade."
"Oh fine." she conceded. 'Not.'
Jackie sighed while surprised that he just started dating a demon, the mother, well ex-mother of the demon sorcerers. 'This is either a bad day, or just a crazy day.'
"Jackie." Jade said. "Is she going to be my new aunt? And will you get married soon?"
"Jade, that's jumping ahead too soon. We haven't even gone on a date yet."
"Oh, so you aren't going to….fuck?" She said while Jackie looked at her in a frown. "Heh heh….oops."
"Jade! Where did you hear that word?!"
"You." She gulped. "You're kind of a loud sleeper."
'Bad day.' he thought while facepalming.
"So…..can I be the aunt to your kids?"
"Jade!"
