A/N: I don't own Harry Potter or Phineas and Ferb. Read and review!

Phineas opened his eyes in the Hospital Ward. The white sheets, walls, and floor made his eyes hurt a lot.

When he got them to focus, he was able to see Ferb reading Paradise Lost in his bed. Ferb noticed he was awake and gave him a thumbs-up.

"Hey, bro," Phineas said, sitting up. Just then, he noticed that they weren't alone.

"Professor Dumbledore? What're you doing here?" he asked, blinking.

Dumbledore laughed. "Well, just having a private talk with Harry. But now, I suppose, we need to talk a little about you, Phineas Flynn."

Harry turned over in bed and looked over what seemed like half the candy store, which was piled on his bedside table. "Hey, guys," he said weakly.

Dumbledore crossed to Phineas's bed. He shook his head. "Phineas, Phineas, Phineas..."

Phineas looked at the ground. "I know. I shouldn't be at Hogwarts."

"Let's not jump to that topic quite yet," Dumbledore said. "Firstly, I would like to congratulate you, Phineas. You are the first Muggle to break into the school and earn an education here since...well...the school was founded."

Phineas couldn't help but smile. "Well, there's always a first time for everything."

Ferb nodded wisely from his bed.

"You managed to keep up the deception for almost the entire year, long enough to earn your exam scores. You were Sorted into a Hogwarts House, hoodwinked the staff and students, and devised a way to fake magic in less than a half hour. That is no small feat." Dumbledore smiled. "You fit well into the House of Ravenclaw, Flynn."

"Thanks, sir. It was fun, at least for a year."

"I'm not finished yet, Phineas," Dumbledore said patiently. "I have been thinking it over for quite a while, and still face a tough decision: do you stay at Hogwarts, or are forced to return?"

Dumbledore lowered his voice and peered at Phineas over the rim of his half-moon spectacles. "Phineas, personally, I would like you to stay, but it is not the question of my wanting, but one of your safety. Bad things are on the horizon, Phineas," Dumbledore said, quietly and darkly. "You've already witnessed Lord Voldemort nearly return, and I doubt that he will give up after this small setback. There is only one thing that Lord Voldemort hates more than Muggle-borns and Mudbloods – true Muggles. And the thought of a Muggle attending Hogwarts, the school where he himself learned magic, is sure to infuriate him beyond anything else, if it hasn't already."

Dumbledore sighed and shook his head. "But I cannot decide the worse evil: if you stay or if you are forced to leave. I leave it up to you."

Phineas practically shot straight out of his bed. "You mean, I can choose? I could stay if I wanted?"

"If you stay, you would be endangering your life beyond any other student, perhaps even that of Harry," Dumbledore warned, trying to make Phineas see sense, but he knew it was pretty much all in vain.

"Oh, it's okay, sir," Phineas said, beaming. "There isn't any problem that can't be solved with a roll of duct tape and a jar of peanut butter. I'll stay here at Hogwarts with Ferb. If Moldywart comes after me, I'll be ready."

"That's Voldemort," Harry enunciated.

But Dumbledore was smiling. "Very clever, Phineas, though I suggest you avoid that particular name in public."

"DUMBLEDORE!" Severus Snape shouted, storming into the hospital room. "Did I just hear you correctly? Are you letting this...this...Muggle stay?"

"Severus, my decision was thought out for a very long time, and very – "

"JUST STOP!" Snape spat, looking at him, and then Phineas with unconcealed hatred. "Dumbledore, this is beyond insanity! This is a school of magic! Have you lost your mind?"

"Allow me to speak with Professor Snape in private," Dumbledore told the children. "I will be back shortly."

When Snape and Dumbledore were outside of the hospital wing, Snape slammed the doors shut. He held his hands behind his back and began pacing back and forth in front of Dumbledore.

"Well?" Dumbledore asked politely.

"He can't!" Snape exploded. "He can't stay! What Flynn needs is a Ministry reprimanding and a one-way train ticket! This is an outrage, Dumbledore!"

"Please listen to my reasons, Severus," Dumbledore pleaded. "Before you decide whether they are right or wrong."

Snape made a grunting sound under his breath, perhaps, Proceed.

Dumbledore gestured at the closed hospital wing doors. "You are concerned for Hogwarts's reputation, correct? Do you think that we will be looked down upon?"

"Of course!" Snape shouted, stopping in his tracks. "This is a school of magic, Dumbledore!"

"But what if Phineas was able to prove himself competent on his exams? What if he scored quite well? Why would that be disgraceful to Hogwarts, if he were able to meet the curriculum?"

"Did he?" Snape asked sharply.

"As a matter of fact, yes."

Snape made the grunting noise again. He shook his head and resumed pacing. "And what of Flynn's own safety? Does he care about the danger his life would be in? Those of his friends and family? The Dark Lord almost returned last night. When the Dark Lord does return, he'll get more than the train ticket I proposed earlier."

"And what if, Severus," Dumbledore countered gently, "we forbid him?"

"Good riddance, I'd say!" Snape spat.

"Do you really think a little thing like an official expulsion is going to keep Phineas away? No, Severus, both of us know that. He'd come back, probably trying something even more risky than the charade he pulled this year."

At this, Dumbledore waved his wand, and the hospital wing doors opened a bit, just enough to let Snape see Phineas, Ferb, and Harry bending over a large blueprint.

"Well, I see what you're saying, Ferb," Phineas told his friends, "but we have to take into account the hot, molten core at the center of the Earth. And Harry, I understand your theory, but the near-absolute zero temperatures of space also make that an impossibility."

Then all three of them looked over and saw their meeting was being spied upon. Phineas quickly stuffed the blueprint behind his back sheepishly.

Dumbledore smiled at them and closed the doors again. "Do you see what I mean, Severus? Phineas will come back, no matter what."

"Then have the Ministry keep tabs on the brat!"

"I doubt that even the Ministry's finest Aurors could keep Phineas Flynn away from his brother, and away from Hogwarts."

Snape seemed incapable of speech. He made a few sputtering noises, his face becoming an unhealthy shade of green.

"Do you understand, Severus?"

Snape bared his teeth for a few seconds, but finally gave a quick, angry nod.

"Good," Dumbledore said.