"Hey stranger," Carter calls to me as I hustle into the production office. It's insanely early, and I'm surprised to see him here. I was expecting a quiet office for at least an hour.
"What the hell are you doing here? It's not even seven," I ask, quickly setting up my laptop and sorting through the stack of signature pages waiting for me, trying to ignore the wave of anxious nausea flooding over me.
"You emailed me your schedule, remember?" He sounds annoyed. Ugh.
"Oh shit, sorry Carter. I didn't mean that you had to be here this early," I sigh and a malicious look spreads across his face. "I'm sorry!"
"Where were you yesterday?" he asks suspiciously.
"Taylor's in town, so I took the day to spend with her, and Sid's parents get in this afternoon, and of course, the big game tomorrow..." I rattle off.
"And of course, a little thing called a show to run," he adds cheekily.
"Don't start, I'm trying to make it work. What did I miss?" I ask, trying to get our conversation focused back to work.
"Nothing major, but you have a draft due tomorrow, remember?"
"Yes," I hiss, but the truth is, it completely slipped my mind. Geez, I have to get back on track here. "I'm going to finish this," I tap the stack of papers, "and then I need a few hours to write."
"No can do Kate, there's a read through at one," Carter says sternly.
"Fuck," I huff. "Can it be pushed?"
"We already pushed it, remember?" he frowns. Another thing I forgot.
"Dammit. Okay, well you know where to find me," I say dismissing him. I need to buckle down and knock some stuff off my to-do list. Somehow I'm able to get through the signature pages before the office opens, and by the grateful looks on the PA's face, I know this was holding them up yesterday. I'm able to get just over an hour of writing in before I'm called to set to put out a fire. Apparently the costumer didn't have a chance to vanity-size the tags on the lead's wardrobe and she's refusing to try on the "fat" clothes. When I arrive, the whole costume department is in a scramble, sewing in new tags and working to convince her it's a European sizing difference.
"Do you have any idea how embarrassing this is?" she's practically in tears when I arrive. Well, it would be less embarrassing if you didn't make such a big production of the whole thing. "What if the crew thought I actually wore a size 6?"
"They would be very envious," I smile at her.
"It's not funny Kate, anything over a 2 is practically plus-size!" she shrieks. I refrain from rolling my eyes, and give her a sympathetic smile instead.
"You know most of these pieces are period clothes, right?" I tell her and she nods. "Sizing has changed. You're wearing a 6 dress from the forties, which is much smaller than an off-the-rack 6 today. Marilyn Monroe wore size 12. Did you know that?" I think I read that somewhere. I'm pretty sure she's not going to fact-check anything that makes her feel better.
"No she didn't," she pouts.
"She did," the costumer jumps in, and finally the actress cracks a smile.
"Really?" she's obviously satisfied and my work here is done. I head back to the office, desperate to get some more words on the page when Carter arrives with lunch.
"You're kidding, it's lunchtime already?" I say horrified.
"It is," he frowns. "The day getting away on you?"
"Well maybe if I didn't need to spend half my morning talking the star out of an eating disorder I could get some work done!" I mutter.
"Here, I brought you some soup and a sandwich," he places the tray on the edge of my desk and the smell of strong spices turns my stomach. I grab my wastebasket and proceed to toss-my-cookies in a most unladylike fashion. "Jesus Kate, are you okay?"
Cater hands me a tissue and I push the food away. "It's just nerves," I tell him.
"You sure?" he asks, his face pained with concern. "You look a little green."
"Yeah, I'm just stretched a little thin these days," I answer quickly. I rummage through my desk and pull out my toiletries bag. I grab my toothbrush and toothpaste and head for the nearest washroom. Wow, I feel so nauseated and it came out of nowhere. I do this to myself. I work myself up into a fit and then I'm surprised when my body reacts badly. As I'm brushing my teeth another wave of nausea hits and I race into the closest stall and somehow lose more of my breakfast. I can't be sick. I have no time to get sick! I splash some cold water on my face and brush my teeth again. I feel remarkably better in a short period of time, which is fortunate as the read through is set to begin in half an hour.
I head back to my desk and Carter is there, hovering over me like a concerned mother. "Kate, if you're sick..."
"I'm not sick," I interrupt quickly.
"All I'm saying is we don't want the whole office going down with the flu," he adds timidly.
"It's just nerves Carter, honest. I feel better already, I promise."
"Well just in case, here's some crackers and ginger ale," he hands me a sleeve of saltines and can of soda. "Sid phoned."
"Yeah?" I ask brightly.
"I told him you were yacking in the bathroom," Carter adds.
"You didn't!"
"He asked where you were," he says defensively.
"Oh Carter, he's under so much stress, he doesn't need to worry about me too," I huff, quickly dialing his cell. Carter shrugs and leaves the office, giving me some privacy. Sid picks up on the first ring.
"Hey, what's going on?" he sounds worried.
"Nothing, just a little bit of anxiety," I tell him sincerely.
"You sure?" he presses.
"Yeah, I feel better already. Honest. What's going on with you?" I'm quick to change the subject.
"I'm done for the day," he announces proudly.
"Jealous," I pout.
"I just need to rest up for tomorrow, so Taylor and I were going to grab some lunch. Can you join us?" he sounds so hopeful and I hate to disappoint him, but there's just no way I can swing it.
"Sorry babe, I have a meeting in twenty minutes," I say regretfully.
"I thought as much, but you can't blame me for trying."
"Are you going out tonight with your parents?" Not that I have time to join them, but a quiet house would sure help me get some work done.
"I don't think so, tomorrow's a big day, I need some quiet time, you know?" he tells me.
"Do you want me to order some food in for you guys?" I offer, looks like I have a late night at the office a head of me.
"We can handle that love, you have enough going on right now," he says sweetly.
"Fuck!" I snap.
"What?" he says worriedly.
"I forgot to get your truck detailed," I confess.
"No problem," he laughs. "It's low on the list of priorities."
"I feel bad," I sigh.
"Kate, you can't do it all. Trust me. I've tried. On a lighter note, I think you're a hit with Taylor," he says and my heart soars.
"Really?" I press for details.
"I overheard her on the phone bragging about my wicked cool girlfriend," he laughs.
"Wicked cool?" I giggle.
"If she only knew the real you," he teases.
"I can be cool sometimes," I laugh, and it feels so good to hear his voice and joke around. Things have been a little tense lately and I need a little break from work to calm my nerves. "I miss you, I feel like we never see each other anymore."
"I know babe," he says softly. "It's only going to get worse though," he admits.
"Yeah, I kind of figured."
"You okay?" he asks gently.
"Yeah, I'm good. Just don't forget, the day after you win that cup, you're all mine," this makes Sid giggle and it's such a welcome sound.
"You got it," he promises.
The afternoon read through drags, and as hungry as I am, I'm also nervous to eat anything more than a few crackers at a time. My stomach still doesn't feel completely settled, but I'm feeling better than I was a few hours ago. I type furiously, simultaneously taking notes and trying to finish a scene I have open in another window. It's a terrible compromise and both my writing and note-taking suffer because of it. Sidney's words rattle around in my brain. You can't do it all. I don't want to do it all, not forever anyway, but this week, well, I don't have much choice.
The meeting breaks for half an hour when the refreshment cart arrives, and again the strong smell of coffee and sugary donuts sends me straight to the washroom to hurl. Okay, maybe I'm sick. When I step out of the washroom, Carter is waiting outside the door with my toiletries in hand. "Thank you," I pant.
"Go home Kate," he says sternly.
"After the meeting," I promise. "Could you run to the pharmacy for me?"
"On it," Carter tells me and is gone before I can even thank him. I pull out my cell phone and send Sid a text.
"I'll be home early, not feeling great."
"Aww sweetie, what do you need?" He's off today, so I don't feel so guilty about asking for a favor.
"Ginger ale and crackers."
"You got it. Want me to pick you up?" He so sweet!
"I would love that. I'm in a meeting for another hour or so."
"Okay, if you're not ready I'll just hang out in your office."
"I love you."
"Smooches!"
An hour and a half later I find Sid waiting patiently in my office, flipping through the latest Hollywood Reporter. "There she is," he says with concern.
"Hey, thanks for coming to get me," I whimper. I'm so ready to get home.
"How are you feeling hun?"
"I don't know, I feel okay right now, but the smell of food or even coffee makes me pukey."
"Let's get you home," he says gently. I start packing up my laptop and some work files, and Sid dutifully carries everything to the truck, opening the door for me and guiding me inside.
"Sid?" I start nervously. "Should I be staying at my place?"
"What? Kate, my parents know we're living together, it's fine babe, stop worrying about..."
"No, not that," I interrupt. "I don't want to make you sick."
"Oh," he considers what I've said. "Uh...what if I stay in one of the guest rooms?"
"Babe, we only have beds for Taylor and your parents," I remind him.
"I'll stay on the couch," he says easily, and I can't help but laugh at the idea.
"No, if anyone is sleeping on the couch, it's me."
"Katie..."
"Don't even try. I'll sleep on the couch in my office. It's decided. If I get any worse though, I'm heading back to my old place. You can't afford to catch this right now." Sid seems to agree to this, and runs his hand along my knee, soothing me to sleep. The sun pours in through the window, warming my face, and the short drive home proves to be very relaxing.
When we arrive home, Sid dotes on me until I'm settled into my makeshift bed. I'm actually feeling fine at the moment, but he won't hear of me getting up and moving around. It was a struggle just to get him to agree to me having my laptop. Taylor has gone to visit an old classmate who lives in town, and Sidney has taken it upon himself to cook supper for his family. "Call if you need anything," I offer, but he's convinced he'll manage.
"I'm just running out to grab a few things, if you need anything phone me," he says seriously. I glance around and he has me well-stocked with gatorade, crackers, bottled water and some strange ginger chews from the Asian market he swears by. He kisses me softly on my cheek and heads out the door. I use this quiet time to get some writing done, determined not to blow my deadline tomorrow. Sid's first game is tomorrow evening and there is absolutely no way I can miss it.
I dig through the paper bag full of remedies Carter picked up at the pharmacy, looking for something that will help with nausea without knocking me out. He's picked up a half-dozen different over-the-counter medications and one solitary pink box. I pull it out and examine it closely. A pregnancy test. Very funny.
Unless...
The thought alone has me running to the bathroom to be sick. It's too soon, isn't it? I think back and it's been almost four weeks since Sid and I stopped using protection, but the chances are so slim. Too slim really to even take this seriously. Still. I read the instructions carefully, and it says the test is most accurate when using the first urine of the day. Well that ship has sailed, so I guess I have to wait until tomorrow.
I hear Sid burst through the front door, and I scramble to hide the test in the bathroom vanity. He has way, way, way too much on his brain to even be thinking about this right now. Besides, I'm sure it's nothing. I just have to wait until tomorrow to know for sure.