Wow…I can't explain why but this chapter took a lot out of me. It's a melting pot of so many emotions it literally blew my mind writing it and you'll probably hate me for the way it ends, but I love the way it ends. There will be more, let me just say that now, maybe like 5 more chapters (I'm guessing) of the actual story. Like I've said before though there will be short stories of circie goodness posted after the 'end.'
Lack of updating lately I know, I'm working on it. Like I said, this chapter was draining and took a lot out of me, and with so much school work to make up there's not a lot of time I have to sit down and drain. I think the wait was worth it though. I'm happy with this chapter. The last day of school though is this coming Tuesday so after that I'll hopefully have a less busy schedule and I'll be able to write more. It depends on my dance schedule. There's a jazz teacher I've been subbing for a lot lately and it doesn't look like he's coming back and the studio offered me the position. Need a summer job and start saving for college so that might take up a good portion of my week.
Enough of my issues! Read this and I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoy reading it.
SIDENOTE!!! The song in this chapter is entitled 'Façade' and it's from the musical Jekyll & Hyde. It's a pretty good show but has some of the most amazing vocals you'll ever hear and if you haven't seen it then I at least recommend listening to this song. The version in this chapter has been shortened and there's a slight lyrical alteration but it's still an awesome song.
Chapter 25
Behind the Façade
Sora dazedly opened his eyes, not really entirely awake with his senses but he could faintly smell peppermint and it made him feel better. He smiled and sat up, supporting himself on his elbows and looking around. The room was still dark but he recognized the sleeping lump under the covers beside him, "Wake up. I can't sleep," he said, reaching over and shaking him a bit. He didn't move though so Sora flopped over onto his back, "Wake up!" Suddenly though he sat up and grabbed Sora, flipping him over and pushing him down into the bed. Sora started to laugh but when he looked up and didn't see Riku he panicked and shrieked at the sight of Seifer.
Sora sat up quickly, frantically looking around the room while pulling the blankets tight around him. Feeling the pull on the blanket off of him, Riku grabbed the edge and pulled it back around him, rolling over away from him. Without thinking Sora let out another shriek and fell off the bed.
Awake now Riku sighed in annoyance and shot a glance at the alarm clock, the lit numbers reading little after 3 and he rolled over and hung his head off the side of the bed, looking down at Sora who was short of breath and appearing rather rattled. Sora didn't seem to notice him right away, too bothered by his sore body to take notice of anything. He just sat there, hugging the sides of his arms and trying to calm down.
It didn't take a therapist to realize what had happened and Riku waited for him to catch his breath before putting his hand under his chin and tilting his face up to his. Sora took a few seconds to realize everything was okay, and he took Riku's hand and held it to his cheek, exhaling shakily. Riku didn't know what to do to help him, and he got out of bed and sat down on the floor beside him, pulling the blanket off the bed and wrapping it around Sora.
Apparently Riku wouldn't have to figure out what to do, because Sora knew what he needed, and he lunged out and grabbed the front of his shirt, pulling Riku's lips to his. After getting over the initial shock Riku returned the kiss and Sora immediately deepened it. It wasn't until Sora started to unbutton his shirt that Riku realized this wasn't right and he took hold of his wrists and drew back to stop him. Sora was still short of breath but he didn't care and he looked at Riku desperately, practically begging for what he needed, "Riku please…"
Riku shook his head though and stood up, letting go of his wrists, "No," he insisted. Sora had been raped, this wasn't right and he knew it. Sora knew this as well but he didn't care, he needed this and he immediately wrapped his arms around his legs and buried his face in Riku's abdomen. "Please!" He couldn't believe this. How in hell could Sora ask this of him after what happened? "Get off," he ordered and Sora sniffled a little before letting go and sitting back down obediently. He looked like a kicked puppy and just stared at the floor as Riku left the room, shutting the door behind him and going outside to get away from the situation. It definitely didn't fix things, but it was the only solution he could come up with and he wished he'd grabbed a cigarette before leaving.
He just sat in the doorway leading off the train for several minutes, trying to figure out what to do. "How do they make it look so easy?" Riku asked out loud, referring to Axel and Roxas. They were right, commitment wasn't something he was good at and for a while he'd thought he could do it but now things just seemed irreconcilable. This wasn't something he'd counted on happening, and he didn't know how to fix something like this.
He didn't want to lose Sora though, and he'd do whatever it took to keep him. Unfortunately, by the time he'd realized this and went back inside his door was locked. So he took a detour instead, going down one room and opening Demyx's door. There were two people in bed, and Riku recognized both of them, wondering just how much Demyx had drunk tonight and how Xigbar would react to waking up in here tomorrow. They were both asleep though so Riku had no obstacles in opening the window and climbing out onto the sill. The train windows were just a bit too high to reach from the ground and so this was the only way, so he followed the sills down to his first open window and climbed through.
What he saw though was something he hadn't expected. There was Sora, sitting right where he'd left him, still looking distressed but his shorts were down around his ankles and one hand clenching the blanket on the floor while the other was wrapped around his cock, running up and down to build friction. His eyes were shut tight and he didn't notice Riku come in, "Uuuhh Riku," he moaned, breath quickening. He suddenly felt someone grab the sides of his face and pull him forward, immediately though he recognized the kiss and threw his arms around Riku's shoulders. "I'm sorry," Riku mumbled against his lips and Sora shook his head, not caring. He couldn't blame him for his uncertainty, especially when he himself felt guilty for his need. Riku pushed him back against the side of the bed, drawing back from the kiss and examining his lover's face. Sora was out of breath but he looked up at Riku longingly, his face flushed and there were tear stains on his cheeks.
It was obvious Riku still didn't think this was right. Sora had been raped less than 24 hours ago and to do now just didn't feel right, almost as if it was taking advantage of him. Sora smiled at him though, understanding his uncertainty and assuring him with a kiss, "I want you to help me to forget… After all, you did say once that you'd help me be me," and with that said everything was right again.
"I hate this," Larxene huffed later that morning, "There must be something in the air."
"What? Allergies?" Luxord asked, finding her complaining this morning different from other times.
Larxene shook her head, "No! Look at them!" she said, gesturing out the window. Luxord picked up his drink and came over to see what she was in such a tizzy over. There were Axel and Roxas, heading for the Bit Top hand in hand and talking happily, "And there!" Larxene said and Luxord looked to where she pointed next, spotting Riku sitting on the couch across the room, supposedly thinking up the song for closing night's performance but that didn't seem to be happening since Sora was sitting in his lap, looking through the notebook of songs none of the circies had ever been allowed to see while sweet words were whispered in his ear discreetly, making Sora laugh and smile.
"Why the hell is everyone on this train in love?!" Larxene shouted, her tone alarming enough to make all three boys in the room jump and Luxord dropped his drink.
Riku and Sora exchanged a look then laughed and Riku told her, "We're not in love."
Larxene glared daggers at Riku and pointed toward the door, "You have 10 seconds to get off that couch and start working on that song before I destroy all chances of you having sex again." That was enough for him, because he knew she'd find a way to follow through with that threat, and Riku quickly kissed Sora's cheek and hurried out of the common car, "Send Demyx over to the Big Top!" he called back and Larxene hissed. She stomped out of the room and up the hall, and when sure she was out of earshot Luxord informed Sora, "PMS." Those three letters explained her mood and Sora quickly hurried after Riku to avoid her wrath.
Cursing and snarling under her breath, Larxene reached Demyx's door and opened it, looking over to the bed and opening her mouth to shout a wake up call. However, when she saw both Demyx and Xigbar in bed, she could do nothing but scream. Her scream woke Demyx and Xigbar up and they both sat up, screaming when they saw her, and shortly there after they realized who they were in bed with and they both screamed again, then all three of them screamed at the realization of what happened last night.
While all the happiness, love, and screaming was going on the circies found themselves completely oblivious to the trouble waiting for them at that night's show.
"Axel! Stop!" Roxas giggled as he and Axel rolled across the floor half dress in a tickle war. The redhead was feeling almost fully recovered from the shot he'd taken and ofcourse the numerous painkillers he'd taken were taking off the edge left over. This had been going on since Roxas had shown up in their room 10 minutes ago to get his hat for tonight and found Axel in a very playful mood. "W-we're going to be-hehe late!" Roxas tried to wriggle his way out of the tumble, but it was useless.
"Late shmate! House doesn't open for another half hour," Axel said as they rolled again, but this time they hit the dresser and the impact sent a mess of pictures and candy wrappers falling down upon them. Roxas hugged Axel, whom had ceased his tickle attack when they hit, "Now look what you've done," Roxas taunted, picking up one of the pictures on the floor and looking at it over Axel's shoulder.
"One of these days I'll find a place for all of them," Axel said. There was no doubt that the collection of memories was enormous and he'd been hanging onto them all even though he hadn't taken any of them. They were just taken by luck when one of the circies had a camera and a roll of film, always seeming to be at the perfect time, and somehow the ones that weren't on the ceiling in the common war always ended up in Axel's room.
"And one of these days your hair will turn gray," Roxas said, convinced the red color would never fade though, "Come on, let's head over to the Big Top. We've only got a few days left so I'm guessing we'll have a packed house again."
"Right right," Axel said, sitting back and pulling Roxas up with him, "Got the choreography for the opening down?"
Roxas nodded proudly, "Yup! Riku and I practiced again this morning!" This new number was intense and easily a new favorite among the circies. Riku had written the lyrics as always, and Demyx figured the melody and wrote out all the sheet music, while they worked together on the choreography and later taught it to the others, whom could then add their own personal flare to the movements and vocals. All this usually happened over the course of 2 days only and they were ready to perform that night. Roxas and Sora had a little trouble learning so quickly but the circies made time to practice extra with them to make sure they were comfortable with it all.
"Good!" Axel was glad to hear he was catching onto the swing of circus life and hugged him tightly, "I don't know about you, but I have a good feeling about tonight!"
Roxas laughed and rolled his eyes, "About the show or what happens after the show?"
"Both!" Axel boasted.
Visitors to the circus had come to accept the fact that when the lights went down and came back up to reveal the opening number, nothing was too grand. In those few short moments the circies could turn a blank floor into a magical vision unlike anything they'd seen before. Tonight when the house and floor lights faded to signal the start of the show the crowd fell silent immediately, waiting on the edge of their seats for the music to start and pull them away from their ordinary lives, if only for a few hours. The lights came up with the music, a bowed instrument playing rapidly and low staccato. Only two people were on the floor at the moment, and while the returning circus visitors recognized the circies by their costumes their faces were semi-hidden by very different but elaborate masks that covered their eyes and they were frozen in what appeared to be the middle of a fight, rapiers crossed between them in duel stance.
The bow continued to play staccato, but when a sharp organ joined in with an edge, they unfroze and the fight began, choreographed and practiced to well that it seemed real. Suddenly they stopped though and turned on the audience, the first of the two singing:
"There's a face that we wear in the cold light of day!" Returning circus fans recognized the Ringmaster's voice, and the other boy sang right after him:
"It's societies mask it's societies way."
Then they turned back and returned the attack on eachother both harmonizing with:
"And the truth is:
That it's all a façade."
Then they took the audience by alarm when they lunged and stabbed the other, but to their surprise the swords vanished as they pierced into the chests, a clever illusion from Marluxia high above the circus floor.
"There's a face that we hide till the nighttime appears," The visitors recognized the second singer, it was the blonde who was from their world, the ambassadors son.
Riku picked up right after him with, "And what's hiding inside, behind all of our fears," Roxas joined in on the final part, as they dropped the duel stance and turned back on the audience again, "Is our true self, locked inside the façade."
Then came something the audience hadn't been expecting: around the Big Top, a few people began to stand up and they threw off their coverings, revealing circies whom had been sitting among them, all wearing different elaborate masks that covered their eyes only. They all drew in the audience members sitting close to them, singing sharply:
"Look around you I have found
You can not tell by looking at the surface
What is lurking there beneath it!"
The circies hurried down the isles to the floor, while one of the females sang, fans recognizing her as the beast master of the group,
"See that face
Now I'm prepared to bet you
what you sees not what you get
Cause mans a master of deceit!
So what is this sinister secret?
A lie he will tell you is true," she extended a hand to Riku who took it and helped her over the barrier between the floor and the audience, singing the answer, "It's that each man you meet on the street isn't one man but two."
The other circies swarmed over the floor, movements sharp and emphasizing every word they sang,
"Clearly everyone you see
Like him and her and you and me
Pretends to be a pillar of society.
A model of propriety
Sobriety and piety
Who shudders at the thought of notoriety."
The circies tumbled and flipped, showing off jagged movements as Riku addressed the audience, heading for the center of the floor,
"Ladies and gents here before you
It's not about glamour and glitz.
We don't have saintly looks
But we're no sinners or crooks!
Hypocrites
Hypocrites!"
Kairi posed a question, heading for the center of the floor to join him while the other circies performed around them
"If we're not one but two
Are we evil or good?"
Roxas joined in the questioning, hurrying in to join the other two,
"Do we walk the fine line
That we'd cross if we could?"
Riku answered with them both,
"No sense in waiting
To break through the façade!"
Another circie hurried in to join the group, Demyx declaring: "It's a nightmare!"
Axel and Luxord followed in with, "We can never discard!"
Larxene's voice rang sharply as she followed them in, sharp contrast as Xigbar sang with her, "So we stay on our guard!"
Everyone turned out to the audience as the song came to a close, joining in singing,
"Though we love the façade
What's behind the façade?"
The music silenced as well as the other circies and they all took off their masks as Riku finished the song by simply saying, "Look behind the façade."
Roxas loved the feeling that followed performances. For the entirety of them nobody paid mind to the audience, knowing only that they were there to entertain, and after it was over they finally got to feel how much delight they'd brought to the watchers. It was amazing and he glanced over at his brother, whom was enjoying this experience for the first time. They took their bows but suddenly there was a shrill whistle ringing over the audience's cheers and applause, and this wasn't part of the opening.
The circies looked to see what the interruption was and were alarmed to see several police officers pouring through the entrance to the Big Top. The cheers and applause turned to murmurs of confusion as they saw the police, which turned to shouts of protest when they saw them circle around the circies and an officer over a megaphone informed the audience, "Tonight's performance is over, we ask that you orderly leave through the main exit," his instructions could barely be heard over the shouts of the audience. They were furious by what was going on, what reason did they have to do this?
That was just the question the circies wished they knew the answer to. An officer, clearly higher ranking than the others informed them, "By order of the Twilight Town court of law, you are all hereby under arrest."
"What the hell for?" Larxene demanded, voicing what they all were thinking.
"For destroying the world's church and damaging surrounding property," as soon as he said that Sora spoke up, "According to article 6 of the 18th amendment any federal conviction made pertaining to the church must first be made known publicly for a period of 3 days minimum! And without proper justification-" he didn't get to finish though, the officer silencing him when he drew out his gun and pointed it at him. To the all the officers' surprise though Riku pushed him back and stood in front of him, glaring the officer down as if daring him to shoot. Then only a second later Axel pushed him back and did the same, then Roxas, then Luxord, then Xigbar, then Demyx, then Larxene, then Kairi until the circies had made a line.
Sora stood at the back of the line watching it all and at a loss for words. He hadn't expected any protection in a situation like this, not even from Riku, yet all the circies were more than ready to take a bullet for any one of them, even Sora. He was new to their circus but right then he understood why they called themselves a family, and he felt like he belonged to this family. And somehow, despite the grim situation at hand, he couldn't help but smile a little.
So…what happened? It will be explained in the next chapter, and honestly I'm still tweaking the full story. But I really liked the ending of this chapter. Seriously a moment I take pride in writing. Tell me what you thought though please. This chapter felt slightly different when I was writing it and I'm hoping it goes over well with you guys. Please review and tell me what you thought. I promise to update again as soon as I get the story fully written in my head and on paper. Thank you guys for reading and continuing to read! 25 chapters and the circus is still going strong! I wish you all the best in all the world!
Your loving bohemian, Mad-TopHat-Ter