A/N: Mature content warning!! Delving deeper into Shepard's back story and what happened on Mindior. You can skip this chapter if it makes you uncomfortable. As always, thanks so much for reading/faving/following/reviewing! I love you guys and everything you share! Bioware owns the ME universe.
Her sheets were a damp mess around them. She arched into him, pressing their bodies closer. He rolled his hips faster, lips seeking hers. Her nails carved lines down his back as she moaned his name.
They lay in a breathless heap, him still on top of her. She traced lazy circles on his shoulders and he buried his face in her still-wet hair. Shepard kissed his cheek and he kissed her neck in response.
She sighed happily, "I'm exhausted."
"As you should be, Siha."
"Of course, you're not, are you?"
"I am relaxed. I have not done as much as you have." He propped himself up on an elbow and lightly touched the small device affixed to her chest, "You are not yourself."
She harrumphed and kissed his lips softly. He returned the gesture, smiling against her. His Siha was stubborn. She refused to believe that anything was wrong, despite the facts. He sighed against her, temporarily giving in. She laughed into his neck before he pushed himself off and laid next to her. She immediately curled against him, resting her head on his chest. He wrapped his arm around her and drew light patterns across her bare back until she drifted off to sleep.
"Mom, where's Vesta?" I bite back the urge to gag as I wipe the gore from my face.
"She was still upstairs. I don't know if she's still there."
I nod once and take off up the narrow staircase. I slowly open the door to her room and call, "V? It's me. You still here?"
My sister shimmies out from under her bed, "When I heard the shot…God I'm glad you're here!" She throws herself at me and I cling to her tightly.
"Mom's downstairs. Come on."
"Wait, what about Dad?"
"I saw him on my way here. I told him to run to the forest. They're only attacking from one side of the colony. He…was covered in blood. I don't know if it was his or not."
I watch the color drain from her face as she nods slowly. "Who else?"
I silently curse the fact that she knows me so well. "V-"
"C, please. They're my friend too."
I sigh heavily and look at the floor. I know she's right. "Eric." My voice breaks, "Right in front of me, V. I watched him…"
She pulls me into another tight hug. She doesn't have to say anything, I already know. I pull away, my face hard. She takes a deep breath and we rush back downstairs.
"Girls, come here." My mom motions us to Dad's gun safe. She starts handing us various weapons and we divide them up between us. The last thing she pulls out is two weapon holsters. We strap them on and set the guns in their places.
"Mom, the forest is safe. Go that way. Dad's waiting for you there. Take Vesta with you."
"Ceres, what are you saying?"
I check the pistol in my hand before answering, "I'm saying I promised him that you two would get there safe. I'm going to see if anyone else is stuck here. I can't leave them."
"Absolutely not, Ceres Dia. You are coming with us and that's final."
I look up sharply at my mother, "No. I know the back alleys better than anyone. If those people have any hope, it's me. I'd rather die saving them than survive being a coward. I don't break my promises. Now, go." I take her arm and turn her toward the door.
She tries to protest again, but Vesta stops her, "She's right, Mom. Dad might be hurt. We need to find him. She'll come back to us, right?" She looks at me. Her eyes are deep russet, glowing with determination. I give her a grim smile and nod once. Our mother sighs and pulls me into a tight hug. She plants a kiss on my head before taking Vesta's hand and heading out the back door. I watch them disappear and run out the front, into the heart of the colony.
It's a mess. Debris and bodies are strewn through the streets and the smell of smoke and death is heavy in the air. I push through, trying desperately to find anyone still alive. I find my favorite corner store burning bright. I hope no one is trapped in there as I shake my head and continue on. In a half charred back yard, I find a shed packed full of people. I usher them out and point them to the safest route I know. I hand one of the men my rifle. He nods to me before following the group. I cock my shotgun and cover their escape. Four shots, five slavers fall. I sigh heavily, pushing the feelings to the back of my mind. I quickly leave, hoping to draw any other batarians in the area after me. It works, but I'm soon cornered. They overpower me and drag me, kicking and screaming, to a clearing they have fenced in. They throw me with some other women, none much older than I am.
"Fire any of your guns and they all die," one spits at me. I growl in response.
They take us one by one and cut our clothes off. Each alien claims the 'animals' that strike his fancy. When one comes to me, I bite his hand. He rears back and slaps me hard enough to split my lip. I spit the blood and stare back at him. He smiles at me and laughs darkly. I wish I had my pistol so I could blow his head off. He picks me up by my hair and drags me in front of everyone. I'm standing naked in front of the group. He gives me a change to cover myself as best I can with my hands, but I don't. I stand straighter, denying him the control he wants.
"This little one will make a fine example. Even the most determined will submit." He thrusts his knee into my gut so hard I double over, gasping for breath. Two others come up behind me and pin me to the ground. I manage to kick three others hard enough to stagger them before they subdue me again. The one that dragged my around by my hair appeared above me, pulling at the clasps on his pants. I try to fight, to pull away, but the pressure on my shoulders becomes heavier, more solid. I feel my biotics flare as I fight harder. Scaled hands are shaking me gently.
...
Thane continued to shake her, despite her biotics dancing across her skin. Her eyes snapped open and the blue fire died. She pushed him away and rolled out of bed. She folded into the corner, hugging her knees to her chest. He looked at her with obvious concern. Shepard started straight ahead, forcing her breathing to slow. It was just a nightmare. It was over. She dug her nails so hard into the skin of her arms that she drew blood. The pain was a welcome distraction from the nausea that dream always brought. She gripped her arms tighter, sending pricks of pain shooting down them. She would not give in to them again. She would not. Shepard bit back the tears that wanted to fall hard enough to make her cheek bleed. She squeezed her eyes closed, willing the memories back into the box she locked them in. A soft touch on her arm caused her to push herself farther into the corner. Her eyes popped open to see Thane kneeling in front of her. She forced herself to relax into his touch. She was suddenly very self-conscious as she realized she was naked.
"Can you get me a blanket?"
Thane sat back and tugged the white one from her bed and handed it to her. Shepard tucked it around herself and mumbled her thanks.
"What was this one?" He asked softly, referring to the nightmare.
Careful to not look him in the eye, she answered, "Mindior again."
He nodded slowly. Nightmares were a regular occurrence with the commander and he was not surprised, given the life she had. But some seemed to rile her up more than others and it was these that she staunchly refused to talk about it. He still asked, in case she needed the invitation to finally talk some of it out. This time was no different, however; as she shook her head. She usually would try to brush it off with humor by now, or pretend it never happened. Tonight, she was having trouble calming herself. He wanted desperately to comfort her, but the way she had reacted to his touch not long ago, he was at a loss. She finally reached for his hand.
"I'm sorry."
"You have no need to be," he replied.
Shepard shrugged. Thane brushed her hair back from her face and she gave him a small smile. He kissed her forehead gently and she allowed him to return her to the bed. He sat next to her and she scooted herself hesitantly into his lap. It took her several minutes to relax against him. Neither was able to fall back asleep.