Title: Smile: Know Me
Author: Arithion
Disclaimer: If they were mine, the series wouldn't just be implied shonen-ai in certain bits… trust me... not mine
Rating: PG13
Genre: Angstish, bit of drama… um… yeah
Pairing: TezxFuji …
Chapter: 26/45
Summary: What's behind a smile…?
Warning: Yes well… A bit of Angsting is back, insight, um oh yeah kisses in a flashback… hmmm that's about it …follows eps 51 and 52 fairly closely.
Note: Please note, this fic has been finished for a long time, I just keep forgetting to upload it here as well as well as my LJ =x
But I'd like to thank everyone who's enjoying for taking the time to read
Smile: Know Me
Fuji woke with a start as a feather light touch danced along his side. He could have sworn he heard Tezuka chuckle, but all he saw when he could finally focus was serious brown eyes looking back at him. He felt a little resentful seen as how he decided he'd gotten to like the feel of the other's skin against his own, but at the same time that thought almost made Fuji want to blush.
The older boy moved first, and Fuji tried to fight off the feeling of loss he felt at the removal of that warmth. Somehow in the daylight, he no longer felt so bold, and he didn't know why. It was sort of strange, being hesitant after being so forward the night before, but he really couldn't seem to do otherwise.
Swinging his legs over the side of the bed, Fuji concentrated on his toes, trying to pull his thoughts together. The previous night was etched in his memory and he found himself still fighting off that blush, that uncertainty. Although, he didn't think he should be uncertain with those memories floating in his head.
They almost tumbled onto the bed, falling next to each other. Somehow that seemed more natural, although neither of them was thinking all that much at the time. Soft lips met pliant, and Fuji couldn't really keep track of whose were whose, all he knew was that it felt good, it felt… right.
Fuji's hands worked on releasing Tezuka from his shirt, the same way the other's did that for Fuji's. Kisses grew more fevered, more demanding, until Fuji felt like he was going to melt, going to lose himself. And he'd never wanted to be lost so much in his life.
Shirts divested, a small gasp escaped the prodigy's throat as Tezuka's hands ran over bared skin. His own hands gripped at Tezuka's waist, working up the other boy's back, until they could tangle in the mess of brown hair, pulling their bodies flush.
He could feel Tezuka's excitement, and knew that it matched his own. It was exhilarating to know that he could make the older boy feel that way, and at the same time there was an element of fear in there. A fear of the unknown, of how to react to certain things and of what other people would say.
But Fuji rarely cared what other people thought.
Fuji wasn't too sure how long they kissed, touched and explored each other. They didn't go further than they'd been, just searched for little things that they hadn't noticed before, and it felt good. But with the ranking tournaments underway, they were both a little tireder than usual.
As they drifted off into sleep, comfortably twined with each other, Fuji was glad that they hadn't even needed to speak a word.
"Fuji…"
Blinking, Fuji looked up at Tezuka, and could feel himself blush. So much for fighting it. The older boy stood in front of him, already dressed for school, and Fuji suddenly felt a little self-conscious. He made to stand, and was stopped by a hand on his shoulder and a kiss to his forehead. Suddenly he felt the need to speak, to let Tezuka know what was on his mind. "…two way street, Tezuka. Remember?"
Tezuka smiled that half smile Fuji had only ever seen him use in private, and nodded. "Yes. But lets traverse it under our own steam, and not push."
Fuji cocked his head to one side and laughed, giving into Tezuka's point. Pushing himself up off the bed, with a glance back at Tezuka, he made his way to the bathroom. All of a sudden he was thankful for his block in the ranking matches, because he wasn't too sure he'd be able to concentrate that day given stiffer competition.
~*~
On the fourth day, Fuji had already secured his regular spot. Not that it was a hard thing to do, but it generally left time for him to watch the other matches. Although this match; he hadn't expected it to go out that way. Not. At. All.
In fact, he found himself resenting the data tennis player just that little bit for his victory. Because it hadnt just been a victory. And the normal first years being so loud on this side of the courts, was just adding insult to injury.
Before he could stop himself, Fuji found himself almost snapping. "It just ended." It wasn't generally in Fuji's character makeup to feel sorry for someone, but right then, he genuinely felt sorry for Momo.
But then his concern turned to the way that Tezuka was going to be feeling, and he was no longer paying overly much attention to those around him. He almost didn't even notice himself correct the observations of the first years when they thought that Momo may not have recovered from his previous injury. "Nope, Momo was in good shape against Inui."
"But, how…"
Not showing in the least how annoying Fuji found the loud mouthed first year, he answered with the only true answer he could give. "Maybe Momo was defeated by Inui's awesome play." Because despite Fuji's own disdain for the way that Inui had garnered the relevant information, the fact of the matter remained, that Inui had played the better tennis. More precise didn't necessarily equate to less effective; in fact, there were few people that Inui's data wouldn't work against. Fuji took a moment to revel in the fact that he hadn't let Inui gather data on himself yet, and didn't think it likely he ever would.
Continuing his observations, Fuji left no uncertainty as to just how it was that Inui knew Momo's tennis so well. "That means, in the weeks leading up to the regionals, helping us gather data on our opponents wasn't the only thing he was doing."
"How does it feel to be observed from behind for two months?" Ryuzaki-sensai's statement didn't exactly make Fuji jump for joy, but he realised that data tennis was just that. And without the data Inui gathered, his ability was sorely hindered.
It surprised Fuji that the clearest tone of betrayal seemed to be in Kaidoh's voice when the younger boy spoke, and it made Fuji wonder, just idly, why that was. "He was collecting our data, too." If Fuji really thought about it, that voice sounded positively incredulous, and a little hurt. Despite himself, Fuji smiled. That seemed very interesting.
The next match, however, was the one that interested Fuji the most. Probably because Tezuka was playing, but also because it was Tezuka playing Inui, and Fuji wanted to see just how far the data tennis player thought he could push their captain. On the other hand, he was curious as to how far Tezuka would let himself be pushed.
There was a fluid grace to Tezuka when he played tennis. The way he moved, the concentration that creased his brow, even the way the sunlight managed to glint off his glasses. At the same time there was this predatory edge, a gleam in his eyes, a heat to the way he held himself. It all spoke of just how much Tezuka loved the game, loved the victory. And it reminded Fuji of the way Tezuka was in certain other things. Standing there and watching the game, Fuji couldn't help think that Tezuka played hard at every game he played, tennis or otherwise. The question was, whether or not winning was everything?
So while Fuji watched, he thought about everything that he'd come to know about Tezuka. He watched Inui judge Tezuka's drop shot, and retaliate. He watched the way Tezuka's eyes narrowed slightly, the way his stance seemed to solidify, the way he held the racket, the way he lost himself to the concentration that was the match. Winning wasn't everything to Tezuka, it was that he played, and that he gave it everything he had all of the time.
It was something Fuji never thought he'd understand, it was something Fuji didn't know if he wanted to understand. The prodigy's eyes never left the game. Inui was stronger, much, much stronger. He'd improved his overall strength and stamina and refined his style. It was impressive, very impressive.
Still, Fuji had to stop himself from frowning at what the others were saying around him.
There was pure glee in Eiji's voice when he spoke. "It's about time, to see Tezuka lose."
It made Fuji want to glare at the redhead, but he refrained only because he was distracted by Kawamura's words.
"That guy, he hasn't lost once since he entered the school. I was jealous, of that regular's jersey Tezuka wore since freshman year."
Those words hit Fuji, and he wondered just how many of his friends were truly his friends, or did they just act like it. Did his friends think that way about him as well? And suddenly he wondered just how lonely Tezuka actually felt, because his talent built a wall around him. Fuji's chest tightened a little, and he wanted to make Tezuka realise that he wasn't really alone, not anymore.
It almost made Fuji sad, and yet, Fuji refused to ever admit being sad, it just wasn't the way he was. The game was close, and Fuji frowned a little. Not a good score 4:3 in Inui's favour, and the current game wasn't looking promising. When the umpire called Deuce, Fuji couldn't keep the shock from his face. Inui – break Tezuka's serve?
Fuji's eyes never left Tezuka. There was something about that shot, something about the way that Tezuka was standing that told Fuji the older boy wasn't done yet. He was hiding something, warming up to something, had been saving something. Fuji found himself almost leaning forward to get a better look. It made Fuji smile with pride, knowing that Tezuka didn't give up on something he truly wanted. In a way, that made Fuji feel just so much better, and not just about the match.
With every stroke of his racket, with every push of the ball, Tezuka drove past his own limits, creating a new barrier. It made Fuji shiver just to watch it, made him want to call out and cheer the older boy on, but at the same time, it made him want to hug the taller tennis player so he would know that he wasn't alone.
Every time Tezuka improved, every time he dug past the limits he'd reached and made new ones for himself, a portion of who he was got locked away. It wasn't locked away out of stubbornness or pride, but out of necessity. By reaching past restrictions, Tezuka reached past understanding, and in the place of friendship he seemed to garner only an awed respect.
Fuji was saddened that his friend had to take steps to protect himself like that, that Tezuka was almost forced to grow up by too many circumstances in his life. It made Fuji want to reach out and speak clearly for once, to let Tezuka know in no uncertain terms where they stood. But that just wasn't their way, so Fuji would simply settle for being there, the way he always had.
His eyes narrowed a little and he smiled. Tezuka's stance had changed that little bit, the way he held himself, that ever-present pride in his eyes… and Fuji just knew. "It'd be good if you watch carefully. This is Tezuka's trump card at its full strength." He felt an overwhelming sense of pride for the older boy. "You won't see it so easily."
Then it was over; completely and utterly over. Not that the game was at an end, but that Inui would no longer even be able to think that he had the upper hand in the match. Fuji found himself speaking yet again, his tone serious and soft. "This is Seigaku's Captain, Tezuka Kunimitsu."
And when the match was truly over, Fuji watched Tezuka closely. The way his shoulders sagged ever so slightly, the way he moved, and the sheen to his eyes; it all spoke of so much pain; pain that had nothing to do with his left arm.
With a sigh, Fuji decided to wait for the older boy outside the locker room, because Tezuka wouldn't meet his eyes, while they were changing. No matter how much the taller boy tried to hide it, Fuji knew what was wrong, and there was no way he was letting Tezuka let it get him down.
Falling into step beside the other boy when Tezuka left the locker room, locking it behind him. Fuji nudged him lightly with his shoulder. "Stop it."
Tezuka glanced at Fuji before concentrating his gaze back on the pavement. "If I stop walking we won't get home."
"If you don't stop, we'll never reach Rome." Fuji didn't even miss a beat, cerulean eyes gazing intently at Tezuka from behind tawny hair. It was only chance that it rhymed… really.
Stopping abruptly Tezuka frowned a little. "That rhymed." He began to move again, Fuji beside him.
"You don't say." Fuji winked at him. "You know, Tezuka, you did what you had to."
It was barely audible, but Fuji heard it nevertheless. "But did I have to do it so well…" Tezuka's voice was soft, distant and in pain, and almost drowned out by their footfalls.
With a glance at the taller boy, Fuji spoke, his voice on the same tone level as Tezuka's, yet filled with a type of care he gave no other. "Yes, you did."
Fuji felt Tezuka's eyes rest on him, the question obvious, and looked to the side to lock gazes with the taller boy, smiling softly. "If you didn't, you wouldn't be being yourself."
For a second Tezuka's face froze before the frown melted away to be replaced by the barest hint of a smile, and Fuji felt oddly relieved. Walking the rest of the way in silence, Fuji decided that he liked the road to Rome. He liked it a lot.
~~**~~
Well there we go… yep
Hope you enjoyed it! Feedback appreciated!