Me: Well, it's late, I'm tired, and I want to sleep...so what do I do?
Iggy: She chooses to write Iggy Ramblings. WTF?
Me: OMI!
Iggy: ????
Me: All will be explained in the chapter!!!
Iggy: -sighs- Right. Good...can we sleep now?
Me: Remember what I wrote at the bottom?
Iggy: Damn....
Me: here's the chapter....
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Me: Wow, I haven't updated this story in ages, so I thought that I'd better do it...
Iggy: Good. The thing is, you've been neglecting some of your other stories and then you go and make a new one without updating them! And then you update it once a day!? What's wrong with you?
Me: -shrugs- Taking a break from my usual stuff
Iggy: And the other thing is that Bell should be doing her math project right now...but she isn't
Me: Okay. I think that I am officially freaked out. Kara and I were talking on AIM this morning and Iggy was being.....sensible!!! And then Kara said: "You know something's wrong when Iggy is more sensible than you
Iggy: And then Bell started laughing and saying 'sensibubble.'
Me: I must be more sensibubble and less sensible!
Iggy: -facepalm-
Me: What? Am I not more sensibubble than you?
Iggy:...........no comment...
Me: Okay, one of the main reasons for writing this is I need your help. You, my loyal readers of fanfiction!
Iggy: Good grief....
Me: The other day, Damon Iggy and I were having a conversation about random stuff. I can't remember what....
Iggy: Because her memory is like a black hole where something goes in, but nothing ever comes out again....it's sad really
Me: -whacks with herring- Anyway, guess what Damon said?
Iggy: Here we go....
Me: 'People on fanfiction are stupid.'
.................................................................................................DUN DUN DUN!!!!!
Iggy: -sighs- Then Bell said that she'd put it on fanfiction and ask for hate mail
Me: But he didn't believe me.....so, everybody out there reading this. Please, in your review, leave some hate mail for Damon! Make it as detailed as you can, so I can send it to him in a big email and he'll take back what he said
Iggy: Poor Damon, he's so gonna get it
Me: Think about it, though! He's been freaking bagging us and I just want to make a point!
Iggy: Good. Now leave the poor guy alone.
Me: Why? Are you just afraid that he's going to get a whole horde of fanfiction people on his doorstep and then get killed and then he won't be able to describe the girls to you anymore and you'll be all upset....funny word. Upset. How does that even work? I'm up and set? What the heck? Anyway, continuing on with more important issues-
Iggy: Okay, Bell. I think that you've had enough chocolate for a very long time....
Me: How long? Can I have chocolate now? Please? NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW!!!!!!!!!!
Iggy: -sighs- Didn't you have a story that Heather helped you write that you wanted to put up?
Me: Oh yeah.....Here it is. Heather and I wrote it together ages ago and I never got around to putting it up. I hope you like it :D
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IgGy'S iN cHaRgE!!!!!!!
Gazzy: Max why are you dressed up like that.......in a DRESS????
Iggy: A DRESS!!!!! I May be blind but that is so funny!!!!
-Max glares-
Iggy: She's glaring at me isn't she?
Nudge: How do you know????
Gazzy: Oh my god Iggy can see!!!!!!!!
-Iggy smacks forehead-
Iggy: If I could see I'd be laughing at Max's dress. Is it pink and frilly?????
-Max smacks Iggy's head-
Iggy: Oh does someone need a hug???
Max: Uh.........
Nudge: I wanna hug the blind guy!!!
Gazzy: No me!!!!! Hug me Iggy!!!!
Angel: He likes me the most!!!
Fang: None of you want to hug Iggy......especially not Gazzy......
Iggy: Are you still paranoid about me being gay?????? Cause I'm not!!!!
Gazzy: IGGY'S GAY!!!!?????????
Iggy: No!!!
Nudge: ....why didn't you tell us????
-Max and Fang burst with laughter-
Gazzy: I only like you as a brother!!!!!
Iggy: ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
Nudge: Do gay guys always have these tantrums?????
Fang: No Ig's a one of a kind gay guy
Angel: ..........
Max: Ok that's enough...Ig's not gay!
Fang: He just looks gay!
Iggy: And you look emo!
Fang: ???????
Iggy: Okay... you sound emo!!!!!!!
Gazzy: Max likes EMOS!!!!
Nudge:......
Angel: She doesn't.....
Gazzy: Phew......but I thought you liked Fang??????
Max: I do!!!! He isn't emo though.
Gazzy: Is Angel an alien?????
Angel: Is Nudge from another dimension????
Nudge: Is Gazzy part dog???
-All buzz with random questions-
Max: SHUT UP!!!!!! OKAY LISTEN HERE!!!!
1. Iggy is not gay!
2. Fang is not an emo
3. Angel is not an alien
4. Gazzy is a human/ bird
5. I don't like Emos
6. Iggy is a blind mutant bird freak who likes Ella!!!!!
-Iggy's mouth drops open and blushes-
Gazzy: I knew it!
Max: ARE ALL YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED!!!!!!
Iggy: Not quite........
-Smiles deviously-
Max: What???????
Iggy: When was the last time you and Fang did-?
Max: Come on Fang time to go!!!!!!
Fang: .............................
Gazzy: What was your question Iggy?????
Nudge: I wanna hear the question?????
Angel: No you don't.....-gags-
Gazzy: What????
Angel: I'll tell you later...
Max: Iggy, I hate to say this but you're in charge
Fang: God help us!
Iggy: Don't worry.......
Max: NO BOMB MAKING!!! MUM WILL KILL ME!!!!!
Gazzy: Aw
Max: Love you. Bye
Iggy: I bet you love Fang more!!!!
-Max throws high heel at Iggy's head and walks out the door-
Iggy: Yeah.......YOU'RE NOT AFRAID TO SAY YOU LOVE MAX ARE YOU FANG!!!!
-Throws shoe at Iggy's head and runs out the door-
Gazzy: What do we do now????
Iggy: Simple. We go through Fang's stuff
Nudge: WHAT???
Angel: Fang won't like that
Iggy: Fang doesn't like a lot of things
Gazzy: He likes me!!!!
Iggy: Yeah, he likes you Gazzy
Nudge: And me?????
Iggy: YES!!!!
Angel: And I know he likes me too!!!
Iggy: FANG LIKES YOU ALL!!!! OKAY!?!?!?!?!?
Nudge: YAY!!!!
Iggy: I have a better idea. We'll hide all his photos of Max!!!!!!!!!
Gazzy: YAY!!!....uh what????
Iggy: He'll go bonkers!!!
Angel: This is your lamest prank yet!
Iggy: I'm blind. Give me a break!
-Angel glares-
Gazzy: Angel's glaring at you Ig
Iggy: I can't see it or worry about it! Many advantages to being blind
Nudge: Huh? I thought there weren't any advantages to being blind
Gazzy: Me neither...
Iggy: Maybe a gay path is good for me???? I won't have kids to tease me...
Nudge: Fang was right! You are gay!!!!! You just admitted it!
Iggy: It was a joke!!!!
Gazzy: How come it wasn't funny???
Iggy: Can a blind guy say a joke without being told whether it's funny or not, or being accused of being gay!!!
Angel: I say comedian is out of your career path
Nudge: He won't be able to dodge the tomatoes anyway!
-Everyone laughs-
Iggy: I don't want to be a comedian.......let's just get on with my plan
Nudge: Great
Iggy: We hack onto Fang's laptop and we go onto his blog
Angel: ....are you sure
Iggy: It's perfect
Nudge: What then
Iggy: We tell everyone that Fang loves....walruses!!!!!!
Gazzy: Uh..........
Nudge: I don't get it?????
Iggy: It will show Fang loves walruses and everyone will send him one and then his bedroom will be filled with walruses and he'll be crushed!!!!!!!!!!
Angel: Or we could just send you to him and he'll believe you are the walrus
-Iggy's eye twitches-
Gazzy: Are you okay????
Iggy: You.......you.....think I'm crazy........I can see it... I can see it.....
Nudge: Uh......Iggy you can't see. You're blind
Iggy: That's what you want me to think..........I really can see!!!! I see you and you and ....and...
Gazzy: I'm scared!!!!!
Angel: He's delusional!!!!!
Iggy: Look....look.....I see Erasers!!!!!!
Nudge: -squeaks-
Gazzy: Iggy do you know who I am??????
Iggy: You're..........dinner!!!!!
Gazzy: ARGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH
Iggy: COME HERE!!!!!
Nudge: FLY GAZZY!!!!!!!
-Gazzy flies around the house screaming-
Angel: I'll call someone!!!!!
Gazzy: Ow he's biting my leg!!!!!
Woman: Hello.........Mental hospital how may I help you
Angel: My friend is trying to eat my brother!!!!!
Woman: Hmmmmmmm.........did you try telling your friend that eating someone else is wrong and that-
Angel: Yeah, but he went even crazier!
Woman: What's he doing now???
Angel: He's trying to shove Total in the microwave
Woman: We'll be right over
Angel: Good
Nudge: Everything will be okay Ig!!
Iggy: Yeah it will!!!! That's what the magic pixies said!
(HOURS LATER)
-Iggy in stray jacket-
Max: What happened Doc???
Doctor: Someone seemed to have thrown a shoe at his head!
Fang: Um............
Max: Iggy!!!! I keep telling him to not hit himself with my high heels, Doc
Doctor: You're lucky this time....
Max: How are you feeling Iggy???
Iggy: I feel blind.....cheated....hungry......trampled upon....devastated
Fang: SHUT UP IT ISN'T ALWASY ABOUT YOU!!!!!
THE END?
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Me: -is in hysterics-
Iggy: O_o
Me: I.....can't.....stop.....laughing
Iggy: Bell, stop laughing at something that you helped to write...
Me: I put this away ages ago and I just dug it up. I sent it to Lola over MSN and she loved it. I've read it three times now and every time I do I end up laughing....BECAUSE IGGY'S GAY!!!!
Iggy: -sighs- -facepalm- Not this again. Everyone please don't go sending questions asking if I'm gay.....'CAUSE I'M NOT FNICKING GAY!!!!
Me: OMI!!!
Iggy: Omi? What the heck does that mean?
Me: Madeline Cullen wanted me to say it on Iggy ramblings. It's like OMC (Oh my Carlisle), but it's OMI! OH MY IGGY!!!!
Iggy: That's like Fnicking
Me: Yeah....Kara, it's such a Bloody wicked mcawesomene word!
Iggy: -facepalm- There's another one....
Me: One day, I'm gonna write a dictionary...in fact, I have one in the back of my writing book
Iggy: Don't put it up now
Me: Yeah....I need to discuss something else now :D
Iggy: Like?
Me: -shrugs-
Iggy: -facepalm- I think that you're just overtired
Me: Me too.....Maybe I need to sleep?
Iggy: That's a good idea
Me: Yeah....OH WAIT! I remember now! Someone asked you if I'd caught you putting up that chapter....
Iggy: Oh...crap
Me: He was caught five minutes after writing it...
Iggy: Unfortunately...
Me: But I couldn't be bothered deleting it....and I told Rain off...I think...
Iggy: I don't think that you did
Me: RAIN!!!! HOW COULD YOU TURN ON ME!??!?! Okay, I forgive you
Iggy: WHAT!?!?! Just like that you forgive her?
Me: Uh-huh, but only because of that awesome wedding....that I almost missed because Heather dragged me along to go shopping
Iggy: -sighs- Great...
Me: Okay. I think that I talked about everything that I needed to....
Iggy: Good
Me: KRILL YUM YUM YUM!!!
Iggy: Don't bring that up....
Me: Saint sent me a very awesomene message that I must share with you. I hope that you don't mind, Saint.
Iggy: Bell!!!! DON'T!
Me: Too late:
Subject: Random Message
Me: So, I'm sitting here watching t.v. and this commercial comes on saying,
"It's better than fish oil! Buy krill oil tablets!
I haven't stopped laughing yet.
Fang: Weirdo...
Me: -whacks Fang- Why don't you go take some krill oil tablets? -laughs
hysterically-
Fang: -rolls eyes-
-Saint and Fang
Me: Seriously, when I read this, I went on a high at my friends house for an hour saying that quote over and over again...
Iggy: It wasn't a pretty sight...or from my point of view I wanted to become deaf
Me: Okay. That's it for now. I hope that you enjoyed the chapter :D Now I have a very important math project that I have to finish...
Iggy: SUCK!
Me: you're helping!
Iggy: Damn...so close...
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Me: There you go guys. End of the chapter
R&R!?!?!!?!?
Oh, and don't forget that Damon said that all people on fanfiction are stupid! Send the hatemail in the review, and the challenge is to make it as detailed as possible ;)
Bell and Ig