A/N: It's been awhile, but here is the new chapter. Kind of a bit more drama in this one, I am not intending this story to go on forever, so it might end soon around the thirty chapter mark. I know you don't want it to, but this story can only keep going with the same problem for so long. Here you go and I hope you enjoy! :)
Closer. Almost in grasp and all I need to do is get closer. I guess I could be describing two things at the same time; we were in all sense getting in close reach of the cure. Bobby and Sam had found something liable to mulch off of after I finally caved and showed them the journal; all they needed was a few more details on where it might be and how to obtain the item. Mmm…Bobby and Sam…oh! Dean. Blood, fresh, human blood flowing through their veins, warm, deliciously tantalizing and---No.
Damn it, I should know better not to let my mind run with human activity when hunting for food. There really wasn't anything in the dead tall grass surrounding the hunter's house besides some birds and field mice. Where was a buck when desperate for one? However, now I was watching a stray cat lounging in an old car on the top stack far into the metal graveyard out back. This was my all time low, hunting a house pet with really no home when it could be given one by me or Bobby even? I love cats and I'm about to murder the cute furry feline.
My hand hovered at the edge of the seat I was holding on to while the rest of me latched on the side of the four poorly towered vehicles long abandoned. A little bit closer, almost got the tail…I growled loudly as a sound disturbed the hunt, telling the cat there was danger and to flee. Looking over my shoulder, not returning my appearance to normal as I glared at the intruder. Sam.
A noticeable flinch came from him at my expression, including when I dropped to the dirt ground into a silent predatory crouch. "Yes?" I asked, voice coming out angry, deprived, and in a hiss, assuming he was here before me for a reason.
"I just came out for some air. Break from the research, after all it is Dean's shift in helping Bobby," he answered.
Bah boom. Bah Boom. Bah Boom.
"Such pretty music to my ears."
"What, Dean actually working?"
No. I meant your heart, Sam, it is so healthy, functional, strong, perfect. Any doctor would be fanatic over it, just like I am. Shaking my head and giggling, I closed my eyes and reopened them, revealing the natural color as I straightened my frame.
"Yeah."
No! No! No! Lying will get me nowhere, I know this for sure, but I can't tell him what I really am thinking and what I really am thirsting. Blood. Tons of it and he has what I want, what I need and hunger for. Last time I fed was…last night. What the hell? My cravings shouldn't be this bad, I mean I have been doing good, eating when supposed to, waiting for the week to be up and last night I had dined on the finest rabbit juice that Bobby had to hunt down and shoot for me. I felt like some kind of child where I had to have others to provide my food.
Then again, so was he, Sam was lying to me. He was outside to look for me since he saw me come out here. What did he want that he had to find something more dangerous then practically anything? Dean was researching, which was strange considering he didn't seem the type and more along the lines of guns and no brains. One giant leap while his brother was one foot in front of the other, small steps for mankind. All I can think about is food, even though I am trying not to linger on it and act human it isn't too good to be having regular thoughts fly in when in my current state of being. Complicated.
"Wanna bite to eat?"
That caught me off guard, eyes missing his as they lowered to his neck, spotting the smooth skin that contained so many arteries. I need something! I'm sure it is all just a big mistake, he saw how I looked previously, he knew that I was hunting for my tastes, I probably just misread what he meant by the words.
"Um...burgers again?"
"We can always change it up to make it interesting. I think I'm all burger out thanks to Dean."
"Same here."
Blood. Hungry. So hungry, and I shouldn't be because I had already fed last night! Last fucking night and I am starved like I had been deprived of food for a month. I…I…I need help. Maybe just a small pierce into his skin, into the neck, those delicious arteries, I know the exact one to puncture as to not kill him and to keep him alive. But I've never had fresh human blood before; it's always been the bags from hospitals or animals roaming around, although there was that time with Dean when Gordon came. I need more…
"Sharae!"
I blinked fast and shook my head finding Sam before me, his hands on my shoulders and staring at me concerned and maybe even a little frightened.
"Huh?"
"Are you okay? I mean you just stopped talking and didn't answer me at all. Then I noticed your hands kind of quivering and saw blood come out."
Opening my hands I looked with interest at the half moons decorating the inside of my palm. Red and leaking with what all I had in my system.
"I'm, I'm fine Sam. Really, don't get so freaked out when someone just spaces off and ignores what you are blabbering."
What is wrong with me? My thirst is definitely getting to my head because since when did I get all bitchy? I wasn't this way, this isn't who I was and it happened so fast. Yesterday I was normal, being with Dean, shooting, kissing, and the jazz of all normalcies except for maybe the shooting bit, not every normal person does that. We really need to find that cure soon.
Moving around Sam, I headed back towards the house hearing the hunter behind me following. Once we both got to the door and inside through the kitchen we separated, him to the living room, me up the stairs and to my bedroom. I plopped down on the mattress, sighing while I stared at the ceiling, finding glow in the dark sticker stars placed on there. There were so many things that I didn't know about my mother and finding it all out now, was actually comforting. It made me wish she were here though to hold me in her arms and tell me everything was going to be all right, that we were going to find the cure that would save me from this Hell that I desperately want to escape, that seemed impossible to escape.
A knock came on the door and I groaned internally. I guess it was time to bring the soldier in to see what was wrong in the barracks. Turning on my side so then I had a good view of the entrance to my room, the person on the other end didn't wait for words to enter as he did so anyways. It was Dean of all people, should've known too. He came over and pulled up a chair, straddling it backwards and meeting my eyes.
"What's up Haley?" he smiled, obviously trying to lighten the mood I was in.
"How many times have I told you it isn't Haley and that it is Sharae?"
"About a thousand."
"Close enough."
I smiled and closed my eyes, not wanting to look at him for fear that I would start acting like I did with Sam outside. My predator within was raving for a meal and right now, Dean was the only option closest in the room and it wasn't helping. Again, what is happening?
"You're hungry…"
My lids snapped open and I stared at him afraid, shaking my head and pushing myself back, turning away from him and facing the wall.
"No."
"Yes you are, I can hear your thoughts you know. I heard it the whole time you were outside and up here after coming in. Why didn't you say anything this morning to us? We could've gone and got you something."
"That's the thing Dean, I don't want you three to worry about feeding me, because I can do it myself. I have for the past two years, and I just need a stable way of getting my food like I did with the hospital. My supplier is probably wondering where the hell I have been lately. He's human and so he is safe from Gordon back at home. Or at least he should be. Listen, Dean, I am not going to play the helpless girl who can't do anything for self, I almost had my meal before Sam interrupted. My body and mind have been a little off since my last feed and I am not sure why. Just leave, I'll figure something out tonight."
I knew he was still looking at me and that he wasn't intending on leaving. Stubborn bastard. I can do this, I am fine, I will just go and head out to a hospital, snatch some blood bags and I will be right as rain tomorrow and the rest of the week. Well, it appeared that easy, it didn't feel that easy, especially when Dean came up and kissed my neck making me bite my bottom lip and whimper.
'What if I offer you my blood to help you out?'
"No! Dean. You can't that is not how I function. I don't drink from living humans, I---."
'It'll be fine. I know you'll stop before anything bad happens. You are a good person Sharae, even if you don't think so.'
Water came to my eyes and I hated how he was doing this, but inside I could feel the predator shift in excitement and thriving hunger. Soon I felt the teeth protrude out of my gums, my nails elongate naturally and my vision change. Hearing the beating of his heart, strong and supple I growled turning around and grabbing his neck I saw the look of shock in his eyes, the look of the unprepared and the unexpected. It made me want to stop.
'Don't. Sharae you need this, just do it.'
This was so unlike Dean, this was…I sighed leaning in slowly and running my tongue along the part of vulnerable and open skin to find the vein. Finally, I dove my teeth in, feeling him jerk and I immediately pushed out soothing emotions, trying to make it not painful in any way. I was lost in ecstasy from rich flavor, so musky, pure life, and then I stopped, pulling away and retracted all my vampire qualities. I had enough. Dean was very much alive when I finished and not too weak, I didn't take a lot like I normally would have if I had allowed myself longer time at the neck. This act that I pulled sickened me.
I'm a freak and unnatural, I deserve to be killed. I vowed I wouldn't drink from a human and I did, no matter if they were willing or not, I still broke my one vow to myself and to Tori. I want to take it all back.
Dean's arms came around me and I cried, placing my hands on his chest and trying to push him away, which I could but at the same time I didn't want to. He was trying to comfort me when it was completely out of character for him, and I know that he felt kind of awkward doing so, but he knew I needed it. There was a slight prickle on my neck, stinging and burning. Gasping, I stood, running out the door and to the bathroom, stopping in front of the mirror and looking at myself as I moved the hair away. Before me, were two puncture marks on the exact same side where I had bitten Dean. With the sight and sound of Dean at the bathroom entrance, I knew he had seen and in that moment we both shared knowledge that this connection was worse and deeper than we thought. Not only can others hurt Dean and get to me, but also if I hurt Dean…I'm screwed.
Author End Note: Thanks for reading and please review.