A/N: Sorry this has taken me so long. If you're still here, reading this, you are faithful and loyal and I'm so sorry!

Chapter Rating: T

Enjoy.

On My Way Down

On the way down I saw you, & you saved me from myself & I won't forget the way you loved me. On the way down almost fell right through but I held onto you.

Chapter Twenty Six – Make You Feel My Love

I know you haven't made your mind up yet; but I will never do you wrong. I've known it from the moment that we met, no doubt in my mind where you belong.

In the morning, things are calm. Kendall is awake on time, and even Carlos is getting ready a head of time. James has been up for an hour longer than anyone else. He slept well, but once six o'clock rolled around James's internal clock woke him up, and there was no going back to bed. So he showered, and put on clean clothes. But time was moving slowly, and so James took it upon himself to make breakfast for the rest of the guys. After all, now cooking was added to his long list of skills. Just barely of course, he couldn't do much, but thanks to Hailey a simple eggs and bacon for breakfast, and some hash browns depending on how he was feeling, was completely plausible. Before Hailey, James had never been in the kitchen unless it was to bother someone else who was cooking or hanging out with the guys sitting on counter tops with a few beers.

Logan is the first one to join James in the kitchen.

"What's all this? You're making us breakfast?" Logan sits at the island counter and yawned.

James shrugs. "It's a big day. I figured it'd save us time."

"Liar, you're just getting all sentimental." Logan grins and closes his eyes.

James rolls his eyes and just keeps cooking. By the time he is done, Kendall and Carlos are in the kitchen as well. Kendall can't stop grinning and Carlos won't stop fidgeting. Logan is fine; it isn't the first wedding he's been in. James doesn't know how he feels this morning. He's excited for Kendall of course. But there's this feeling in his chest he can't name. He just wants to see Hailey. He wants to hold her and see her smile. It's kind of sickening that it's only been twenty-four hours and he misses her so incredibly already. James still isn't use to whatever this is.

They eat the meal that James prepared. It's actually really good. The boys don't heckle him about it either. They're too busy shoveling the food down their esophagus. When it's finished, they all kind of sit there and look at the counter top. No one really knows what to say. Kendall's life is about to change forever. Something Kendall could not be happier about.

Soon after breakfast, they pile into the Escalade. It's time to get ready for a wedding.

James is sitting next to Logan in the front seat while Kendall and Carlos recline in the back. Music is playing softly, just as background noise, and James's mind is running wild. He wonders if everything will go according to plan. Big Time Rush has a reputation of making things well, complicated. But he's sure that today will be fine. Today is too important to complicate. Today is the day that Kendall has always been waiting for. Today is the day James is sure he will never see.

Everything is already in motion when they arrive. Chairs and tables are being set up, the building already decorated and the limo that drove the ladies is already parked across from them. It is the same limo that will bring Kendall and Jo to the airport so that they can catch a flight to Greece for their honey moon. James wants to tell the guys he'll be right back and go find Hailey. This yearning for her is loathsome. He just wants to shrink her down so that he can carry her around in his pocket and have her with him all the time. The hell with work, she can just live at the mansion with the boys. She can share James's private quarters and he will never have to be without her. Then he realizes that what he is wishing for is what Kendall is making a reality, minus the shrinking part, and James shakes himself.

The wedding starts at three. The boys don't really have much to do. It is too soon for them to change in to their suits and the wedding planner has everything in order. It's not like James can ever help order people around because the tiny brunette woman in a pantsuit scares him and he has no idea what is going on. So the boys just kind of relax and explore the venue. It's nice. Really nice actually. It is on a cliff overlooking the ocean.

As James stands at the altar in his jeans and plain white tee just admiring the view someone says his name. When he turns he is sort of frozen.

It has been a really long time since he saw his own mother. He actually forgot that she would be here today. She looks beautiful like she always does. In a navy blue dress that cuts across her chest and straps across her left shoulder, it is cut just above her knee. It is a fitting dress for her. There are no ruffles and no designs it is plain, and form fitting, but it makes his mother look well. She has always been the business type, and has never tried to dress like someone born in his generation. She is too formal and far too classy. Her heels are high but not enough to bring her to his height. He still towers over her. Her hair is done differently, short bangs pinned back instead of frayed and pushed across just above her eyes. Her makeup is perfect, and her skin is glowing, but for the first time, she looks older to him. Not in the way she carries herself, or even her skin, but in her eyes. She looks sad almost.

"Mom." He smiles and pulls her into his arms for a hug, and she holds on to him tightly, and when he goes to let go, she tightens her grip on him. So he lingers and wonders what is going on. Is there something wrong? Has something changed? She still looks exactly as his mother does, but something is off. She has never been the affectionate type, so clinging to him when he tries to let go is something different.

"How are you?" She asks when they finally pull apart.

James half smiles and looks from the ground, back out the window. He doesn't know what is going on, but his mother has got him all choked up just by hugging him and asking him how he is. Maybe it was in the way she said it, she finally sounded like she actually cared. But he composes himself and shrugs.

"I'm a best man."

"I'm so excited for Kendall."

"Same."

"How are things going for the band?"

"Really well. Yeah, we're working on a new album after Kendall comes back from the honeymoon."

"James, I want you to know that I am proud of you."

He pauses momentarily. He doesn't know what to say. His mother has never been like this. She has never been sentimental. She has never been loving or kind, or proud even, that she has shown at least. He always turned to Kendall's mom for those things. His mother was always hard and business like, there was no time for play or love in her eyes. Maybe she regretted it now.

"Thanks mom."

She opens her mouth to say something else, but Katie comes running in saying that she needs his help reaching something. It sounds ridiculous, but Katie is short, and he imagines that everyone else is preoccupied. So he looks at his mom, waiting for her to say something or tell him to stay. But she smiles and waves him off, telling him she'll see him later.

And then the wedding is starting and James can't really recall how everything happened, but it just did and there he is, standing next to Kendall, with Logan and Carlos on his left. They are at the altar and the Pastor is standing to Kendall's right. Everyone is in their seats. Kames can see his mom a few rows back. She looks happy, but at the same time she looks sad, and he doesn't know why. But his heart hurts when he looks at her. So he turns his attention to something else, because today is a special day. A happy day. It needs to be this way for Kendall, for Jo.

Then the music began. It wasn't the traditional here comes the bride piano music, but it was an acoustic guitar and one of Jo's friends that James had never heard of, but she began to sing and the only thing that James could register was that she had a pretty voice, because then the girls began to walk down the aisle.

Katie first, in her red dress and heels with a red hair band, holding her hair from her face, and a bouquet of red roses in her hands. She looks beautiful. It isn't hard for Katie to do so, and it isn't hard for James to admit because she is like his little sister, and he hopes to watch her walk down the aisle again one day, but the next time in her own white dress.

James smiles brightly at her when she looks to him. She smiles back, but in a different way, like she knows something he doesn't. Then he looks back towards the aisle and he understands the look on Katie's face, because behind her, is Hailey.

There is no word that can describe what James sees. There is no word that can describe what he feels. Hailey has never looked so stunning, and James has never felt like this. Her dress hugs her slender frame like it is part of her own skin, and then flows like water just above her knees. There is red Ribbon in her long hair, tied with a bow atop her head. Her makeup has been done by a professional, and she looks more perfect than any human he has seen before. She is heaven incarnate. She is the most wondrous thing that James has ever seen. He feels drawn to her. He wants to go to her, to take her in his arms. To touch her and to be reassured that she is real.

She meets his eyes, her blue, blue eyes have never seemed so bright, and she has never looked so happy. And it is in that moment that a thought crosses James mind.

I love her.

Then, Camille is coming down the aisle. She looks amazing, like always. She looks only at Logan.

But then, it is Jo. Her dress is so white that it seems to glow, and the veil is thick enough to obscure her face from everyone. James glances towards Kendall. And the expression on his face is something that James has never seen before. Not just on Kendall, but on any other human. Kendall smiles and takes Jo's hand when she reaches them.

It is silent when the Pastor begins.

James pays attention. He really does. He listens to every single word that the man says. But he can't repeat any of it, because he is thinking about today. How strange it is. How wonderful it is. How he never thought that he would be where he is right now. But somehow, he is there.

A lot of things have changed for James. He is still handsome. He is still famous. He is still wanted and lusted after by all women. But James does not want or lust after all women anymore. He still loves his reflection and he loves being famous, but not as much as he used to. He seems to realize now that there is a bigger picture. He thinks about Mama K and how her cancer is slowly killing her. The doctors haven't told her she is improving, which can only mean that she isn't. He thinks about Kenneth and how he stuck around even when he found out his brand new wife was ill. He thinks about how that is true love. He thinks about his mother, and how she seems so sad on the most joyous of days. He thinks about his father whom he has not thought about in years. He thinks about Carlos and how he might have found the woman of his dreams. He thinks about Logan and how much he and Camille have endured together. He thinks about his best friend Kendall and how today is the best day of his life.

Then he thinks about Hailey and how she has changed him, so completely. He thinks of her beauty and her smile, and her wondrous eyes, and the softness of her skin, and the shin of her hair, the tone of her voice, and how she closes her eyes when she laughs.

Then James hears the words, "In sickness and in health", and he starts to pay attention again, because while he has never been to a wedding, he knows that those words mean it is coming to a close. He glances out over the audience and finds half of them to be crying.

Then he looks at Hailey and sees the longing in her eyes as she stares at Jo.

Kendall kisses his bride, like he and Jo have never locked lips before. He removed her veil slowly, and put his hands to his mouth and paused to keep himself from crying. Even James feels a bit emotional watching this. When Kendall leaned in to kiss Jo, he put his hand on her cheek, looked for a long time into her eyes and closed his own and kissed her.

It was beautiful.

At the reception, people are still crying. But James can't concentrate on them, or anyone because he is searching desperately for Hailey.

Someone taps him on the back. When he turns around, she is there and she is beautiful. And he can't help but think it again. I love her.

A/N: Not nearly as long as I was hoping for but I figured if I didn't post something it was going to be a long time before I got around to writing it again. So once more, I apologize for being absent. You can hate me if you choose. It is okay. Sorry for typos and such, I didn't edit it.

I just hope you enjoyed it. :]