Entry 26

I'm eating my cereal in my bed.

You know why?

Because I can!

I love cereal. Its so crunchy, yet is soft and tastes so good and…

Yes I'm stalling.

Yes I went to Hogsmeade with him.

Yes I had a nice time. I had an amazing time.

Yes I really did have a late, hot chocolate, night rendezvous with him.

Yes, god damnit I did enjoy it!

….purely on a friend basis.

Of course. What else? Why did I even feel the need to write and clarify that?

Lets start at the beginning before I loose my mind.

*the day of Hogsmeade trip*

"Why does it take forever for girls to get ready?"

"James why are you asking me? Ask Sirius, he spends about an hour in the bathroom every morning."

"Yes, Remus, but he's not really doing anything, he's just staring at reflection and telling him self he's pretty." James said with a snicker.

"Damn right I'm pretty." Sirius remarked with pride.

"eh hem. We're ready."

James, Remus, and Sirius all turned around to face the stairs. Charlotte came out, she wore a jean skirt with an elbow length purple top and green sweater. Melanie came out in jeans and a yellow top with little flowers with a butterscotch coat. I was following them, sporting light jeans, a white knit top, and a dark blue beautiful scarf.

We looked pretty hot.

And they definitely didn't look too shabby themselves.

Not that I'd ever admit that.

We all walked to Hogsmeade in a happy group then when we got in the town, the couples went their separate ways.

Leaving James and I.

Because, as you know, we're not, nor never will be, a couple.

"So…" I began.

"You look very beautiful today."

"Friends, James."

"Friends can be beautiful."

"Well, then, James you look beautiful." I said as a joke.

He smirked. "Really?"

"Can we get quills first? My last good one broke the other day."

"Attempting to change the subject huh? You can run, but you cant escape!"

"Look what I've started. I was joking. Now, quills?"

"Right, right. Lets go get some beautiful quills."

I shot him a look.

"What?" He asked, shrugging, "Quills are my friends too."

"Oh boy."

"And girls." He winked.

We walked over and got some supplies; which consisted of James acting out the voices of said supplies to 'make it easier for me to pick.' Apparently if you get a grumpy quill it will affect your writing.

I offered that they have potions to help his mental stability.

We then walked to the shrieking shack, but there was couple completely making out. I told him I wasn't in a mood to watch any porno's.

He shot back if I was in the mood to participate in one.

Ass hole.

We were walking mindlessly, in a comfortable silence.

"I love that song."

"What?"

"The song you were humming."

"I wasn't humming."

"Yes you were."

"No I wasn't."

"It was crimson and clover."

Damnit, that had been stuck in my head for the last couple of days.

"Oh, then yeah, probably."

"That was our fist slow dance." He reminded.

"You say first like there's more to come."

"Of course there will be."

I raised my brow at him. He began to defend. "I know you don't see it Lily. And I don't even know if you'll ever understand it but—"

"Please don't get heavy on me today."

"Alright, I wont. But I do love that song."

I gave him a smile, "me too."

"Before or after out dance?"

I bit my lip…should I lie? Should I tell the truth? He might take the truth badly….

"After."

We were silent again. He began to hum now. "I don't hardly know her….but I think I could love her…"

"Crimson and clover…" I finished. His hand brushed against mine.

"Well, if she come walkin over. Now I been waitin to show her."

"Crimson and clover."

"Over and over." His middle and index finger grasped my lily pendant.

Apparently he believed that since he bought it, it was totally ok to kiss it and hold it in public.

"Well my mind such a sweet thing." I sang the next line, noticing all warm his hand was.

"I wanna do everything." He hand boldly slipped into mine. Intertwining his fingers.

"What a beautiful feeling."

He squeezed my hand. I smiled. My stomach was in a knot and I didn't know why. I looked ahead of me.

"Ice cream!"

he laughed, "mint chocolate chip with a cherry?"

I smirked, "no silly, you like chocolate with pepper sprinkles."

We stood in front of the ice cream stand, "you remembered?"

I just grinned and ordered my ice creamed.

The fat little man smiled at us, "chocolate covered waffle cone?"

"why not, he's buying." I winked at James.

"Pff, and here I thought friends bought separately." He placed his odder and we walked to a near by bench to sit, eat and talk.

"Well see I thought that if friends can call each other beautiful then you could pay."

"Hehe, you think I'm beautiful."

"Naw, I just had to say it back or it would have been impolite."

"Its alright. I know you secretly think I'm sexy."

"Yes and I'm also pining for your body." I said sarcastically.

"I knew it." I rolled my eyes at him. "Want some?" For one fleeting moment I thought he was offering me some of his body.

But no, his ice cream cone was tilted toward me.

"I don't think I'll like your pepper sprinkles."

"Oh come on Lils, take a chance."

I leaned in and took a long, deep, satisfying lick of his ice cream. The chocolate was delicious. I licked my lips to savor the taste.

BAM! My tongue was on fire! I couldn't hardly breathe!

"Water! Water!"

"I—I don't have any!"

"UG!" My tongue was out, and I was idiotically fanning it.

"eat your ice cream quick!" I shoved the damn thing on my tongue, the coldness was welcomed. I sighed as the burning sensation disappeared.

He snorted, "that was hilarious."

"ug! You bitch. That was so your fault. You didn't even warn me!"

"Just think about how you wont be cold anymore."

"I never said I was cold."

"Your hand was."

"you warmed it up."

He smiled. "I'm glad." We smiled at each other for a while. Until we had a rude interruption.

"So is this what you dumped me for?"

"Jenevieve!"

I looked up at her, she truly was beautiful. She could be like Marilyn Monroe, starring on cover magazines her first shot. But man she was a bitch.

"What the hell are you talking about, we never even went out."

"You have such a great ass."

It seems that Jenevieve was drunk.

"Jenevieve I really think you should get some coffee."

"I don't want some coffee, baby I want you." It was kinda sad that she could be that toasted and not even slur her words. I'd bet she drank a lot.

"Wow James, I didn't know I'd be competing for your attention…"

"There is no completion. Jenevieve take a walk."

"I remembered how you kissed me. I remember." She said in a grave voice to James.

I raised my eye brow at that. They had just flirted huh?? Should have seen that one coming.

"You will never kiss her with that much passion. I can still taste your lips on mine." She prattled on. I had a violent urge to smack her.

"We never kissed Jenevieve. We never kissed, we never shared passion, my lips never touched your skin."

Somewhere from deep inside my brain, on a purely 'I want to be more than this stupid drunk dumb ass fuck' went in an annoying high pitched singing voice;

"His lips has touched my skin and not yours! Ha ha!"

But anyways, back to the story she goes all close to my face, his nose scrunches up and then something seemed to dawn on her.

"You're not pretty enough to be Charlotte!"

I don't care even if she is a drunk, skanky, idiot, that still really hurt.

My jaw dropped and James crunched his expensive chocolate waffle cone in his hand.

"Get. Away. Now."

"Whatever. I'm outa here." She stumbled away, her arms flying in every direction.

My face was still in the 'did she really just say that' pose.

Two large, warm hands took both of my cheeks. "Lily?" His thumb stroked my cheeks apple. "Lily flower you need to listen to me, ok?" I nodded. I realized that my eyes had water in them. I'd always felt like no one ever noticed me if Charlotte was around. Charlotte is so damn beautiful. And Melanie has the blonde hair blue eyes 'American cheerleader' stereotype going for her. What am I? I'm the fire crotch.

"Are you listening? You are so indescribably beautiful. You are so beautiful that when I'm secretly staring at you, sometimes it hurts. It hurts because your so beautiful that I don't know if I'll ever get to receive your love. I don't know why you'd ever choose me." He chuckled, "I guess you never have, so I'm right."

I smiled and leaned into his palm. "I don't know about that." He really perked up at this. "Think about it. I'm at Hogsmeade with you. I'm crying because of an ex. You bought me ice cream."

"I'm comforting you."

"Calling me beautiful."

"Touching you."

"Making me smile."

"Sharing intimate feelings." He smiled as he spoke.

"And am going to go buy me a butterbeer."

"I am?"

"You are. We're supposed to go meet the group in 30 mins, remember?"

"Time flies when your havin fun…"

"I bet it would if we had a bit of what Jenevieve was drinking…"I joked.

"That could be arranged."

"You still are a marauder."

"Always will be."

"Good to know."

"Except for that little rule that was absolutely stupid."

"The never wear tighty whities rule?"

"Oh my merlin! How did you know about that one!?"

"You're not the only one that's sly around here."

"Oh come on! You have to tell me now!"

"No way!"

"Why not!?"

"A girl has got to have her secrets."

"I'm pretty sure I've stalked you long enough to know them all."

"Ha! What ever."

"I'm serious." He said in confidence.

"Hmmm…did you know I've made out with a girl before?"

His mouth hung to the floor.

He gulped.

Readjusted his pants.

"That was, by far, the hottest thing you have ever said."

"Really now?"

He nodded. We walked into the pub.

"Too bad it was a lie."

"What?! That is cruel and unusual."

"I told you I could be sly."

We were the first ones there so I sat at a large booth in the corner.

"What do you want a 'honorary marauder member' button or something?"

"That's a bit over the top, a butter beer will do."

"Yes ma'am."

Yes, yes I'm a horrible person. But I am tired, and grumpy and still have not yet packed. And I have to be leaving in less than 6 and a half hours. So I couldn't finish the Hogsmeade exposition. You'll just have to wait till next week. =)

And if I get more than 25 reviews for this chapter alone by the time I get home late Monday Eastern, I will update on…are you ready….TUESDAY! but only if I get more than 25 reviews for this chapter. If I don't, then I'm updating on SUNDAY.

You decide, you decide.

Thank you so much for reading!!

Love,

Jenna