Chapter 26 – By the Spring

Scribing the last few words at the bottom of the page, Akkarin lowered the pen in his hand and he sighed. Lost in the turmoil of his thoughts, he leaned back in his chair and stared at the worn leather-bound book lying atop of the desk. This was one of the few belongings he had forsaken, when he left the Guild years ago. They were meant to be left behind, those old records of his life, while new ones are made, detailing the challenges and excitements he sought while travelling around the world. Never did he expect this abandoned diary would become one of his few treasured possessions today. As among those worn pages, was evidence of the blessed life he had cared little for back then, which he would often find himself reminiscing, with a heart filled of regrets. And since returning from that appalling journey, he had began making entries, of those fears and loneliness he brought back with him, to this old diary once again.

Closing it, he dragged his gaze away from the diary and sought for the tranquillity outside his windows, clearing the sobering thoughts that still lingered at some corners of his mind. Faint voices drifted from the Seven Arches to his ears, reminding him of the Fourday gathering that is taking place tonight. When had he last visited the Night Room? He searched his mind, but could hardly remember his last visit no matter how hard he tried. Far too long it must have been, he told himself ruefully.

Still looking out of his windows, a stab of dismay jolted through him as it crossed his mind that the gathering could well be the last before the war. Willing those thoughts aside with a deep breath, he decided to seek his friend there, before he retires for the night.

His black silken robes flared around him as he walked through the Night Room. Heads nodded in respect, as groups of magicians parted to make way for his crossing. Some were seemingly surprised by his appearance, while others regarded him with a hint of wariness in their eyes. Without slowing his strides, he inclined his head politely to all in reply.

He glanced around the luxurious room. Despite the brightly decorated interior that brings warmth to the heart, the gloom that hovered in the air was overly oppressing to the mind. And unlike the usual delightful gatherings that reverberated with keen and laughter, it was a solemn affair tonight, faces he saw were lined with worry and expressions were as grim as the dark of night. Heeding no attention to the low mutterings as he strode past the magicians, he made his way to his preferred table and found the person he was seeking for, surrounded by a few Higher Magicians, including the three Heads of Disciplines and the Second Guild Ambassador for Elyne.

"Good evening, High Lord." They greeted him as he approached the table, with looks mingled with relief and surprise. Lorlen straightened his face and smiled at him. "What an unexpected visit."

Akkarin returned his friend the familiar half-smile of his, "Unexpected, indeed." He turned to glance around the room again, just in time to catch several magicians staring at him, before they turned away hastily and whispered to their companions in low voices. Watching the look held in those prying eyes, the smile faded from his face. Was it respect or distrust he saw? He considered briefly, before returning his attention to the table and moved towards the chair, which was unofficially his.

Interrupted by his arrival, discussions about the recent changes in the Guild resumed as soon as he settled into his seat. Of late, the Guild was overcast with dread by the approaching war and, the heart of its beliefs shaken by the acceptance of the once prohibited black magic. Many began questioning the principles which had governed them for centuries, since the founding of the new Magician's Guild, while others were apprehensive about the consequences of such a transformation. Furthermore, the execution of Lord Fergun has stirred the anxiety amongst the magicians, for the Guild had not executed its own a long time in history. Concerns were raised and protests were heard, especially from those against the judgement, and even some from the Houses.

"Would House Maron happen to be one of those who expressed such concerns?" It was Ambassador Dannyl who broke in with a snort of disdain, his tone evidently sarcastic.

"That goes without saying!" Lady Vinara returned him a meaningful look.

He observed the exchange in silence. It was true the execution of the disgraced Warrior had stirred an outrage in House Maron as well as some of its supporters. Criticisms were raised, from blaming the Guild for causing the war to cries of disapproval for executing a Guild magician, who was as much a victim under the menace of a cruel Ichani as everyone else was. Annoyed by the frivolous politics of the Houses, he snapped those thoughts away and returned his attention to Lady Vinara who had just drawn the interest of the table.

She spoke about the increasing sense of uncertainty towards the dominance of their young king, found among the magicians lately. Not only it was deemed unseemly of their ruler to demand those vows from their Guild leader, his ruthless methods had the magicians fearing for what lies ahead of them. Shortly, Lord Balkan related that the same matter has led to similar concerns among the Houses.

"Some expressed their hesitance of sending their children to us," The red-robed Warrior said. "For fears that the same vow will be extracted from them, should we ever decide all magicians to learn black magic." He sighed. "I can only imagine how trying our next in-take would be. But of course, that is something to worry about after the war."

Akkarin sighed inwardly. The Warrior was right. No doubt these issues have to be addressed, but not now, not until the war is over. If the Guild still exist by then.

It was close to midnight when the last of the magicians finally retreated to their quarters. The Night Room fell to an empty silence as the voices and the weary footsteps of its last visitors faded into the corridors, leaving him and his friend the remaining ones in the room.

"So...," Lorlen stifled a yawn and blinked away the moisture pooling in his eyes. "What brought you here tonight, my friend? Surely you did not come for idle chatter."

Akkarin regarded the questioning face of his friend with an intent smile. "Would you believe if I told you I missed our little family?"

Lorlen returned a disbelieving snort.

Akkarin shook his head, amused by the reaction of his friend. He regarded him for a few thoughtful moments. "It has been a while, Lorlen." He smiled at the puzzled expression before him.

"Since the last you came?"

His smile widened. "That too," Akkarin said and tilted his glass towards Lorlen. "But it was you I was referring to, my friend. You hardly visit your old friend these days so I've decided to seek you here instead."

Lorlen returned him a fond smile. "Our family has been a handful of late."

Akkarin murmured agreeably.

"But it seems you are having an easier time than of me, High Lord." His voice was lowered at the last words.

Mildly surprised by change of tone in his friend's voice, Akkarin watched the disapproving frown appearing on his face as he stared at him. He smothered a smile. He could always tell when his friend was mocking him. Despite that, Lorlen have never missed an opportunity to tease him whenever he could find. That was before he discovered his secrets, of course. Still, it gladdens him to see that familiar side of his friend yet again. Keeping his expression even, he returned the pretence which he so often did.

"Do I?" Akkarin affected a thoughtful frown.

"Of course!" Lorlen retorted. "May I ask where you were, High Lord, while I'm dealing with those troubled magicians? Ah, let me guess, no doubt you were relaxing and sipping wine in your residence. Isn't it?"

Akkarin raised his brows. "Relax? Sip wine?" He leaned back in his chair and whistled. "I do seem like I'm having an easy time."

"That was what I said, my friend."

"Well," Akkarin added swiftly, "We can switch positions if you like. I will gladly deal with those magicians, while you attend court, sip some wine and perhaps fight the Ichani every now and then?"

Lorlen blinked several times, before his expression was quickly schooled to a neutral one. "Such a generous offer, Akkarin, but one I would sadly decline."

"Sadly?" Akkarin raised his brows. "I'm sure you will grow to like these duties, my friend. Especially court duties. You can attend to them on my behalf, if you like."

Akkarin smothered the overly pleased smile on his lips when he saw Lorlen grimacing with distaste at the mentioned of court duties, followed by an exasperated sigh. "The court is certainly the last place I see myself in." Lorlen rubbed his temples. "Although the antics are entertaining, I am more than happy to just learn them from you. You are the perfect person for this role, my friend."

Shifting his gaze away, the smile slowly faded from Akkarin's lips. A shadow lay over his features that the brightness of the room could not lift. "I will not always remain as the High Lord, Lorlen," he said ever so quietly. He lowered his gaze to the near empty glass in his hand and his dark eyes seemed even darker as he watched the light reflecting off its smooth polished surface.

Lorlen blinked at the sudden change in mood. "Why have you said such a thing?"

"After the war, if we do survive," Akkarin said soberly as he continued to stare at the glass in his hand. "Protest will soon be heard, against the Guild having a black magician as its leader."

"I do not agree, Akkarin," Lorlen's tone grew serious. "A victory will prove your actions necessary."

Akkarin lifted his eyes slowly to meet the firm but reassuring ones of his friend's. "Thank you...Lorlen," he said softly. "There are more reasons..." He stopped without finishing his sentence and closed his mouth, reminding himself not to reveal anything more than he should. Instead, he took a short determined breath and smiled.

"I wouldn't want to spoil your evening with all my troubles, my friend." He leaned forward to set his glass on the serving table and stood up. "I was just reminiscing our novices' days. Those times we spent at our secret hideout."

"The spring?" Lorlen looked up at him.

Akkarin nodded. "If you are not too tired, I was thinking to make a trip there myself."

"At this hour?" His friend stared wide-eyed at him, obviously shocked by his suggestion. A few moments later, he finally shook his head with disbelief, and his look of surprise was slowly replaced with a fond smile. "You certainly are full of surprises tonight, Akkarin," then he hoisted himself from his chair.

They started along the path that led uphill into the forest. The air was moist and chilly. Cold air seeped through his robes, awakening his senses as he walked through the dark forest with only his dim globe light scouting ahead of him. The woods were still and silent, not even the slightest stir of leaves could be heard, except the sound of his boots crunching loudly against the rocky path. It took him a while to realise that the set of footsteps behind him was gone. He turned around to check and found his trail empty. Puzzled by the discovery, he set out to retrace his steps, but stopped after a few paces.

An amused smile slowly curled around his lips.

Leaning against a tree, his friend was breathing heavily, creating puffs of steam against the chilly air.

"You have grown soft, my friend." Akkarin said as he climbed down the path and walked towards the worn out magician.

Lorlen lifted a hand. He swallowed a few gulps of air before he found his voice. "The only physical activity in my life...," pausing again to catch his breath, "is limited to the short journey between my rooms to the University." He sucked in another deep one and heaved himself away from his resting place, "Unless, you consider dealing with the squabbles of our family a form of exercise; mental exercise to be precise."

A low chuckle escaped from Akkarin's lips. "I seem to recall the wisdom of our respected Lord Margen. Physical activity, my friend, is as necessary as mental exercise-"

"Neglect your body and you neglect your mind." Lorlen finished the sentence with a smile, and sighed. "Only idle magicians like him can afford time for physical activities. I hardly get enough sleep."

"Well, if you change your mind, my offer is still open for acceptance, Administrator." Akkarin's eyes shone with amusement again. "You will find that being a High Lord is not just about sipping wine and attending court. Fighting spies and Ichani is the best form of exercises you can get."

Lorlen snorted. "Don't make reject the offer twice, Akkarin." He replied firmly. "Come. We should carry on before my legs fail me." He climbed up the path, staggering slightly.

"Heal yourself Lorlen, you look ridiculous." Akkarin looked at him sideways as he overtook him easily as they climbed. He was returned with an insulted glare from his friend. "I am Healing as we speak, Akkarin." And he chuckled when Lorlen attempted to overtake him as they continued their ascent.

Uphill they went, along the rocky path that wove through the dense forest. Not long after, they reached an outcrop of grey rocks that glowed softly under the silvery light of the moon, which was obscured by the tall trees while they were trekking through the woods. Akkarin climbed over them with Lorlen following behind, and they found themselves standing before a cluster of rocks with water pouring from a crack amongst them, gathering in a pool beneath.

"I forgot how beautiful this place can be," Lorlen breathed as he looked around the night-shrouded spring. The sound of water trickling down the rocks was a pleasant harmony in the quietness of the night. For a while, the two of them stood in silence, beholding the peaceful sight before them.

His robes rustled softly as Lorlen moved towards a boulder and dropped to a crouch, closely inspecting it.

"It's still there," Akkarin murmured, he walked towards his friend, lowered himself at the other side of the boulder.

Together, they pushed the large rock aside, revealing a dark, irregular shaped hole which felt all so familiar. Lorlen's face brightened up as he drew the old battered wooden box out of its hiding place, his eyes shone with affection and joy. "I can't believe no one has found this." Akkarin smiled at the incredulous look on his face. "We kept it well hidden," He told his friend. Lorlen stood up with the game set in his hand and looked around him, as if he was searching for something. Setting his eyes on slab of stone a few steps away, he sat atop of it and placed the box on his lap, taking great care as he opened it. "After all these years, you are still particular about getting your robes dirtied," Akkarin snorted softly as he sat on the ground, leaning against the large boulder they have just shifted.

Still examining the game set, Lorlen plucked out a piece of it and said, "Old habits are hard to change, my friend," he set the peg into the lid of the wooden box checking if it still fits. "This feels just like old times," He lifted his eyes and smiled at Akkarin. "All those times we spent here, just to escape Lord Margen's lesson."

"He was such a monster." Akkarin said.

Lorlen stopped toying with the game set on his lap and reminisced with a faraway look on his face. "I admired your courage then," He spoke after a while and glanced at Akkarin with a smile appearing on his lips. "That little stunt you pulled on him-"

"That I stole his diary and read it to the entire class?" Akkarin added in, smiling at that memory.

Lorlen laughed. "Yes, that. It awed every one of us."

Akkarin lifted his shoulders indifferently, though he could hardly conceal the overly pleased smile on his lips. "Well, he should never have confiscated mine. Not only it gave me the satisfaction of trading his back for my own, he stopped harassing me ever since."

"Discreet, my friend, was what you should have been." Lorlen shook his head with mock disapproval. "Instead, you picked his class to show me that horrendous drawing of him in your diary. And quite proudly I have to say."

"Discreet?" Akkarin gave him a dry look. "Could you explain the part about laughing yourself to tears?

Lorlen chuckled. "I am not to be blamed, Akkarin. After all, your artistic inclination was quite...astounding."

Akkarin snorted. "Your flattery leaves a lot to be desired, my friend," He said dryly and then narrowed his eyes with mild annoyance, "Nevertheless, I am most certain that making my life difficult was his greatest pleasure in life."

"Oh, yes, I'm afraid so." Lorlen agreed. "He showed every sign of dislike for your House." He paused, appearing as if he was searching his memory. "Although, I seem to recall the preferential treatment you did gained for pitting yourself against him."

Akkarin raised a brow, "Preferential treatment?"

"From the girls, my friend," Lorlen was barely suppressing his smile. "The lengths they went to offer you their notes whenever we skipped classes." He shook his head with amusement. "Not forgetting the letters they came with. Weren't they quite flattering?"

Akkarin winced. "Don't remind me of that."

A splutter of laughter escaped from Lorlen's lips. "You should be flattered, my friend. Next to you, I'm almost invisible to the ladies." He smiled ruefully.

"You shouldn't be," Akkarin said. "At least I know of a certain lady who has her eyes on you." He regarded his friend closely, whose eyes flashed with surprise, then looked away guiltily. Keeping his gaze on Lorlen, Akkarin ventured. "Why have you grown quiet, my friend?"

After keeping silent for what seemed like a long time, Lorlen spoke finally. "How is she?" He asked, not meeting Akkarin's eyes. "Have you seen her?"

"Yes," Akkarin sighed. "I've seen my sister, but not the chance to speak to her."

Lorlen nodded, as if to himself. He lifted his head and gazed at the moon which stood against the dark sky. "I hope she is happy. Bellarin." He breathed the name with a small sigh.

"Why did you stop visiting her, Lorlen?" Akkarin asked.

While they were novices, his friend would stay at the Delvon's mansion for a few weeks or so, during each winter break. They would go hunting with his family during the day, sit by the fire hearth at night, playing games of wits and listening to the stories his father would tell about his adventures when he was still a young man. And of the years he spent away from the Guild, Lorlen remained a close friend to the family. Somehow, he had grown close to his sister, much to his surprise. As far as he recalled, they hardly dared speak to one another, for both were equally shy. Although his friend had never said so, for many years, he had hesitated pursing their friendship further than it was. Just like what he felt about Sonea, Bellarin is a lot younger. Two years ago, however, Lorlen stopped visiting his family. When he found out that his friend had learnt his secrets, he wondered if that was the reason for his changed behaviour, especially towards his sister.

"Answer me, Lorlen." Akkarin drew his attention to his friend again.

Lorlen took a deep breath and met his eyes reluctantly. "I couldn't face her, not after what I saw in Sonea's mind, without feeling guilty about what I may do to her brother."

He spoke softly and Akkarin could sense the trace of regret in his voice. He felt a stab of pain. If only he could have done something when he first learnt of his changed behaviour but how could he, when he had made Lorlen his hostage to protect his dark secrets. Not only had he betrayed their friendship, the likely relationship between him and his sister were ruined at the same time and, there was no one but himself to blame for all that happened.

He regarded his friend with a pained look in his eyes. "You could have sought her after you learnt the truth."

Lorlen shook his head, his eyes lowered with sadness. "It was too late. I heard she had received several marriage proposals by then. I have no right."

"She rejected all of them, Lorlen. Against my father's wishes."

His friend remained silent, continued staring at the ground with a resigned look on his face.

"You should explain to her..." Akkarin said but stopped when Lorlen shook his head again. "She will not see me, I know..."

"If I can arrange for you to meet her, would you tell her the truth?" Akkarin asked.

Lorlen stared at him, and nodded slowly. "If she is willing to see me, then I will."

"I will see what I can do." Akkarin said.

Then the both of them sat by the spring, each lost in their own thoughts, sighing quietly to themselves every now and then, not meeting each other's eyes. Akkarin was stricken by guilt as his friend was buried with sadness. Each of them had their own reasons for betraying the trust of an important person in their life. A sad thing it is, that the unknowing mistake made by the foolish man he was, had triggered a ripple of unwanted consequences which changed the lives of those around him. How can he ever make amends to them? He had no answers for himself.

"Akkarin." He was drawn out of his thoughts when he heard his friend spoke. "What about Sonea?"

He froze at the sudden question. "What about her?" He asked, after a short silence.

"Does she know about what you feel, about her?" Lorlen regarded him closely, observing his reaction.

He took a deep breath. "No."

"You are lying," Lorlen's voice hardened. "I can tell from your looks," His eyes filled with disappointment. "I said before I wasn't going to stop you. Not after what I saw in your mind, Akkarin. Your memories showed me that you loved and lost another."

Akkarin looked away. "That was history, Lorlen."

"Sonea is not." Lorlen argued. He took a step towards Akkarin and forced him to meet his gaze. "We have only found our friendship again. All I ask is honesty from you. Do you not trust me?" He demanded of him.

"Lorlen, this is not about trust." Akkarin looked at him in the eyes and saw his gaze wavered for a fleeting second before it hardened again.

"Then what is it about?"

Akkarin looked away from him, his gaze rested somewhere beyond the spring. "Some truths are best remained untold, Lorlen."

For a brief moment, his friend regarded him in silence. Then he sighed. "I still wish you would tell me, Akkarin. Even so, your reaction has told me as much as I need to know."

Akkarin turned around held his gaze again. "When you first asked me why I practiced black magic, I told you that of all people, you are the one I wish I could tell. It is the same now, my friend."

"And you promised me back then you would tell me the truth one day. Would you make the same promise again?" His friend returned his gaze levelly.

Akkarin nodded. "You will learn the truth soon, Lorlen. This I assure you."

...

...

Author's notes:

I hope you have enjoyed this chapter! I have always wanted to write about Akkarin/Lorlen but haven't had the chance to do that till now. Thanks Laura for your great ideas! And of course Ralobat for beta-ing again!

Tell me, did you like the humour between them, the part about their novices' days, and the part about Akkarin's sister? Or anything else you like or you dislike.

Let me know please! ^_^