Chapter 24

Buffy was slowly awakened by the sound of something- or perhaps more accurately, someone- knocking on her bedroom door. At first she ignored it, assuming that it was part of her dream, but it sounded again soon after this time accompanied by the sound of her mother's voice calling to her.

"Buffy? Buffy, are you awake in there?"

Buffy groaned; she was still halfway between being fully awake and fully asleep, and she resisted having to have that state of being decided for her. She was becoming vaguely aware of something warm and solid burrowed against her, though in her fuzzy state of consciousness she had not yet sorted out who or what it was. She snuggled up even closer to it, sighing in a soft exhale as she kept her eyes closed.

But Joyce Summers wasn't going to be put off that easily. She knocked again, louder this time.

"Buffy, if you don't answer me, I'm going to have to come in there myself and wake you up… you're going to be late, and Mr. Giles will be here in five minutes."

Those were the words that shook off a bigger portion of the fogginess covering Buffy's half-awake mind. Her mom was going to come in- and Buffy knew from experience her idea of a good wakeup method, which usually involved tickling and noisy kissing all over her face that was a great way to start the morning off in a very touchy, pissed off mood. Buffy bet her mother would never try to wake Faith up that way. With Faith, she'd probably come and stroke her hair and whisper in her ear to wake up- like that would make an impact on the younger Slayer, who literally slept like the dead. No, with Faith she'd probably always just let her sleep in as late as she wanted…

Faith. That was the last little push Buffy's brain needed to fully wake up. For she was beginning to remember now that the warm solid thing smushed against her was Faith… and her mother was about to walk in on them…

Buffy's eyes shot open, and though they were still blurred from sleep, she could feel them sharpening quickly as her alertness sharpened. She must have forgotten to set her alarm…



"I'm up, Mom, I'm coming. I'm awake…" she called back, loud enough that her mother could hear her, but not loud enough that it would be shouting in Faith's ear. It didn't seem to matter; Faith's eyes screwed up even more tightly, as if in protest at her inevitable awakening, and she burrowed herself even harder against Buffy subconsciously, moving her face against her chest. A sharp thrill of bittersweet arousal shot through Buffy's core, startling her with its intensity, and she was jolted even more fully awake. It was then that she realized exactly how she and the brunette were positioned…

Faith was curled up almost fetally against her, her shins pressed into Buffy's stomach and thighs, her face in Buffy's chest, almost directly between her breasts. Her arms were around Buffy's back, hands knotted into loose fists against her shoulder blades. And Buffy's hands… one was wrapped tightly around a handful of Faith's hair. But the other was up her shirt, directly cupping Faith's utterly braless breast…

Buffy's eyes widened, both with shock and horror as she realized just how close it had been to her mother walking in on her practically molesting Faith in her sleep. Not that Faith would have cared, ordinarily… she probably would have enjoyed it before her coma, gave her the teasing of her life. But nothing was ordinary anymore- there was no telling how Faith would react now.

How was she supposed to extract her hand from under Faith's shirt without waking her up? She was at a very odd angle to do so slowly… and if she just yanked it out, Faith would surely notice and figure out what was up.

Maybe she didn't' have to… after all, Faith's breast felt all smooth and soft and warm, and it didn't seem to mind. Buffy could feel her heartbeat, calm, slow, and steady under her hand, and her own heart sped up in response. Yeah, maybe she could just lay there, she thought, her muscles clinching with sudden instinctive excitement… maybe…

No! Bad Buffy, bad thoughts- and bad Buffy hands…

"Buffy!" her mother called again, making her heart seize briefly in panic. "Buffy, if I don't see you walk out that door-"

"I'm coming, Mom, hang on!" Buffy called back hurriedly. The last thing she needed was her mom waling in right now. Not that her mom would be shocked or embarrassed- she'd probably get a kick out of it, in fact- but Buffy certainly would be.



Slowly, almost painstakingly, Buffy let go of Faith's hair. That easier step done, she began to slide her hand off her breast and out from under her shirt, shivering slightly with barely suppressed and self-disgusted pleasure as her fingertips slowly stroked across her breast, ribs, and stomach lightly. Faith didn't stir, didn't appear to feel anything… in fact, she seemed almost suspiciously still.

It wasn't until Buffy had fully removed her hand, breathing an audible sigh of relief, and was reaching to gently pry Faith's arms from around her that Faith began to awaken, making an odd sighing noise and shifting slightly. As she opened her eyes groggily, Buffy smiled at her a little too quickly, trying to cover up her foreknowledge of her hand's little grope job.

"Morning, sweetie," she said softly, and then immediately worried that the 'sweetie' might have been overkill. She never called Faith that, did she? Or did she? Was she going to know that something had been up, that Buffy was hiding something from her? Not that she was- nothing big, not really. Was Faith suspicious, did she know? Did Buffy look guilty? She had never been a good liar-

Well no shit, Buffy, you panic. You're not even lying, you didn't say anything, and why are you making such a big deal of this? It's no big deal- none. A little tour around the bases without asking permission is all, no harm done. You didn't ask yourself permission either, you were asleep, so it's all good. It's not like you had a hand down her pants.

Oh god, did I? Did my wandering hands wander down- down there? And then decide to stake out new territories? Are my hands Alexander the Great?

"Mmm," Faith mumbled, scowling slightly, and Buffy had to smile at that, at least momentarily distracted by her rambling thoughts.

"Hey, I never said it was good, I just said it was morning," she commented. "I've gotta get up, Giles will be here soon and I've got… got to go to class," she muttered, remembering with a sudden sinking feeling. She wasn't ready, she didn't want to…she would much, much rather just snuggle back up to Faith and go to sleep again, preferably all day. With no more grope incidents.

Well, unless Faith wanted them… or if Faith did the groping. Yes, Buffy could definitely live with that…

No! Bad Buffy thoughts again…

"You don't have to get up, if you don't want to ," she told Faith softly, reaching to tuck a lock of hair back from her face. "I'll see you later today, all right?"

Buffy rolled over, away from Faith, and stood up, already dreading the day, the leaving her, the not knowing what she was doing and what was going on with her. She knew it was illogical, but she couldn't help it. Though she knew Giles would take care of Faith, help her should she need it, and even protect her if it came to that, she couldn't help but remember that he was an older British guy who wasn't exactly comfortable with teenagers, Faith, or touching- all which his next several days would revolve around. What's more, he also got knocked unconscious a lot.

She was going to her dresser to get dressed when she heard Faith roll herself over to Buffy's side of the bed, sitting up. Buffy glanced over in surprise.

"You're getting up? Do you need help?"

"No… just, hand me the walker," Faith muttered, meeting her eyes. "I'll get up too…"

As Buffy went to do so, she thought to herself with part respect, part worry how single-mindedly determined Faith seemed lately. It had been only three days… but then, wouldn't Buffy, in Faith's situation, have been fighting to get back to full strength as quickly as possible too? She knew she would have been… but then, the thought of Faith getting hurt or overtired already concerned her much more than she probably would have been about herself in Faith's place.

By the time Buffy had dressed and watched Faith pull on some more borrowed clothes- she was going to have to take her shopping eventually, she knew- Buffy knew she wouldn't have much more than enough time to brush her teeth before she'd have to run out the door, if she wanted to be on time for class. Today Faith had insisted, with extremely awkward balancing between the walker and Buffy's bed, on putting on her own pants and underwear, and Buffy had watched her anxiously, just knowing she would fall. Faith hadn't, however, but by the time she had finished, Buffy really needed to get going.

She was about to open the door for Faith to make her way through in her walker, having just heard the doorbell and knowing Giles had arrived, when Faith, maneuvering herself with her walker a little more confidently than the day before, called to her hesitantly.



"B?"

Buffy stopped, glancing behind at her with a questioning frown. "Yeah? Do you want something, Faith?"

Faith paused a beat before she answered her… at first she looked very serious, so intense that Buffy started to walk back to her, growing worried. But then Faith began to smile, in such a way that it seemed at first she was trying to control it, but just gave into it, until she was quite obviously smirking at her.

"Yeah, B… I wanna know if you were havin' some wicked pervy dream last night or if that was just your excuse for tryin' to cop a feel on me while I was all sleepin' and defenseless."

Buffy was completely unprepared for that sly little statement. She had been waiting somewhat tensely since Faith first woke up for her to mention that… but when she hadn't, Buffy had figured the brunette hadn't noticed after all. Now she reddened, her mouth dropping. Of course she had noticed- this was Faith. She'd probably been aware of Buffy cupping her boob before Buffy was!

But even as instantly mortified as Buffy was, she was also pleased… for Faith didn't seem embarrassed, didn't seem disturbed or uncomfortable, or even as if it were a big deal. In fact, based on her widening smile and sparkling eyes, she rather seemed to have gotten a kick out of it… or at least out of tricking Buffy. Either way, a good sign.

"W-what?" Buffy sputtered, trying to put as much dignity in her tone as possible. "I was not copping a feel. I was, I was checking your heart rate. And, and you probably put my hand there anyway!"

Knowing exactly how lame she sounded, especially when Faith chuckled in amused incredulity, she turned around, not looking directly at her as she followed her to the stairs, then without asking permission, carried her and her walker down them again. By the time Buffy had resettled Faith with her walker, ran into and called out hurried greetings and cautions to Giles and her mother, and ran out the door to drive to college, she was cutting it very, very close to being late for her first class.

Still, tardiness was not the most prevalent concern in her mind. As she hurried down the halls of Sunnydale University, Buffy's mind was already turning back to Faith. Would she really be okay 

with just Giles in the house? What if a, a vampire or something broke in and knocked Giles out like usual, and Faith was all alone and Helpless Girl?

Okay, so vampires couldn't come in without an invitation, but what if they were cleverly disguised as a salesperson or something, and they had, like, a selection of tweed or some other item Giles was interested in? Or in Faith's case, chocolate or something?

Okay, so vampires can't come out during the day either. But there are lots of other demons and monster-type things that can…

By the time Buffy had reached her first class, she was almost in full fledged panic mode. All the different evil intities she had fought off before were running through her mind, and she was fighting the urge to go straight back out the door and drive back home. How was she going to be able to stand an entire day of this?

Both Willow and Oz were in Buffy's first class for that day, and they both smiled when they saw her slink into her seat about ten seconds after the professor had already started talking. Oz's smile was one of greeting, as nonflashy and laidback as Oz himself, while Willow's was more of a beam, her eyes lighting up with delighted surprise.

"Buffy! You're back!" she stage-whispered, and Buffy could tell how excited she was. For Willow to talk in class was a very rare, noteworthy thing. "You didn't tell me you were coming back today!"

"Yeah, well I didn't know I was either," Buffy muttered back as she opened her binder, trying to look like she was listening attentively even as her thoughts overflowed with Faith, demons, and demons attacking Faith. "I kinda got marching orders."

"What? Really? By who, your mom? I mean, by whom, by whom. He he, I just said the wrong grammar in English class… the literature gods are probably going to smite me now. How come, Buffy? Didn't you want to come?" Willow whispered, and several people were looking at her now, apparently annoyed by the hissing noise of her rapid speech.

Buffy couldn't concentrate on anything- not on the lesson, not on her notes or lack of them, not even on Willow. She whispered back to her tersely, "Look, Will, we'll talk later, okay? I, I really need to listen and catch up on everything here, okay?"



She felt a little twinge of guilt for that outright lie, but then again, it wasn't really a lie. She did need to catch up, even if she knew that wasn't an option today. She also needed to stop trying to avoid Willow's questions, though.

Willow looked a little hurt at her request, but she nodded, her face slightly stiff at first before smoothing itself out.

"Okay… yeah, okay, I understand, Buffy. You, you should focus here… we'll talk later, okay?"

As she sat back in her seat, next to Oz, beginning to take notes diligently, Buffy fidgeted restlessly. She had so far not written down so much as her name, and she didn't think she'd be getting much further than that today. God, she did not want to be there… it was taking everything she had to make herself remain in the room.

The moment class was dismissed, Buffy made a beeline for the door. She had fifteen minutes between now and her next class, and she intended to call home- with every single one of them if she had to. She had four classes back to back today- how else was she going to know what was going on, if everything was okay?

She could hear Willow hurrying behind her, trying to catch up with her, but Buffy pretended she didn't hear. She knew Willow wanted to talk to her- that they probably needed to talk- but she also knew she wanted to talk to Giles or Faith. And in the moment, that was much more urgent in her own mind.

"Buffy!" Willow called out to her. "Buffy, wait, I want to talk to you-"

"I'll talk to you later, Willow. I'll call you at home when your classes are over!" Buffy called back, barely glancing over her shoulder at her. "I'll be in class- don't worry, I just gotta do something…"

She stopped at the first pay phone she saw in one of the hallways, digging in her purse for change before hastily punching in her home phone number. It was a long time before anyone picked up on the other line, a period during which Buffy grew more and more anxious. What could be taking so long?

Finally she heard Giles's voice on the other line, slightly breathless, and she almost melted with relief.

"Summers residence. To whom am I speaking?"

Ordinarily Buffy would have poked fun at Giles's formal phone answer, or at least mentally noted with amusement that both he and Willow were overly concerned- meaning, thinking at all about- when to use whom versus who- but right now she was just glad to hear him at all.

"Giles, it's Buffy. Is everything all right? Are you all right is Faith all right, is anything happening?" she asked in practically one rushing breath.

She could almost see Giles blinking in confusion before his reply, frowning.

"Yes, yes, Buffy, we're fine. Why? Is there a reason you'd think we couldn't be? Has something happened?" he asked, his voice sharpening, alert, and Buffy knew he was probably looking about, searching for intruders. Good, he should be…

"No, I mean, I don't think so, I just, I was wondering.. Giles, are you sure? Where's Faith, what's she doing?"

"That's your true concern here, I wager," Giles said dryly. "She's fine, Buffy, we were doing some exercises to help with her muscle coordination. Do you realize that it's only been an hour since your classes began?"

" Oh yeah I do," Buffy muttered. "Longest freaking hour of my life."

"Buffy, everything is quite under control, there is no need for you to worry," Giles chided her quietly but with a firmness Buffy knew was a reprimand.

"Yeah, I just, I wanted to make sure," Buffy muttered again, and she realized she was starting to flush, twisting a lock of hair between her fingers like a child. "I just thought I'd check, you know… see if any vampires had broken in or something…"

"Buffy, vampires cannot come out in sunlight. And they have to be invited in," Giles reminded her, echoing Buffy's earlier stream of thought. "Surely after three years as the Slayer you realize that?"

"Oh… yeah…"

"This is what I was referring to last night, Buffy," Giles continued, and his voice was a little softer now. "Your feelings towards Faith are all well and good, you are free to have them, and she can no doubt benefit from them. But you cannot let them block you from accomplishing things of equal or greater importance. I understand and appreciate your concern for her, but right now it isn't helping either one of you, but rather holding you both back. You have to let her branch off, Buffy- you can't send her the message, or allow yourself to think, that she is in any way less capable than you are. Not only for her physical recovery, but also, I suspect, her mental one. There are a lot of issues for her to thrash out, I suspect- with herself, with you, with her past. You cannot help her by doing too much for her."

Buffy was quiet for a few moments, struggling with what he had just said. She knew it was probably true… hadn't Faith said basically the same thing to her last night? Hadn't she even got a little upset with her for her actions meant to protect her? But still, Buffy couldn't help it…

It seemed only logical that as Faith grew more stable mentally, emotionally, and physically, that Buffy would worry about her less…but the opposite was true. The more sure of herself Faith seemed in all ways, the more fearful Buffy grew that something would happen to take her away from her. If nothing else did, Faith might decide to leave her. It was irrational, and Buffy knew it, but she couldn't help her own thoughts.

"I know, Giles," Buffy said quietly, and the conflict in her tone was obvious. "I'm just… I don't know…"

"I do understand your worry, Buffy, but for the time being I believe that it is entirely unnecessary," he told her. "Now, Buffy, I really don't want you calling here again today- we will be quite all right while you're at school. If something were to happen, you would be certainly alerted one way or another."

His voice sharpened suddenly. "Speaking of class, aren't you supposed to be in class right now? I must say, to be paying for your education, young people certainly don't seem concerned to be getting their money's worth these days…"