The Bonehead and the Brain - Chapter Twenty Six - Friday the First
Author's Note: This chapter contains mildly sexual language and may not be suitable for younger readers.
Chicago, IL, 8am
Seth opened the hotel room door to an amused Roman Reigns.
Everyone was downstairs eating breakfast waiting for the Big Dog to return and finish his pancakes which had been made especially for him as it was a very special day today.
"Are you ready to eat?" Roman said as Seth rubbed the sleep out of his eyes.
"What time is it?" Seth asked.
"Its 8 o'clock, Sacha's your wife now and we're all very happy about it," Roman replied.
"I know Sacha's my wife, she's supposed to be going on a PR tour in California while we're in - oh my God! Why aren't you packed Roman, we're supposed to be going to Jerusalem today!" Seth said realising what day it was.
"Um Seth, what day do you think it is?" Roman asked Seth.
"Its the day after Smackdown, so that means its Wednesday.
We gotta get ready to fly out to Jerusalem tonight, where's Ambrose?" Seth said flying around his room getting his things together rapidly.
"Actually Seth its not Wednesday, its Friday the First," Roman said and Seth looked at him like he was speaking Chinese.
"Friday the First is not until next week Roman, its the 25th dummy," Seth said.
"Yeah last Friday, this Friday is the First," Roman replied.
"That doesn't make any sense our flight to Jerusalem was scheduled for the 24th, how can it be the Friday the First today?" Seth said.
"I don't know maybe because you spent a whole week in bed making love to your wife and when you broke for a few minutes you stayed up all night praying until you broke for a minutes and made love to your wife some more. Welcome back to the world Seth Rollins were people don't have sex every day for a week straight," Roman said and Seth laughed.
"Okay that did not happen, I would have remembered if Sacha and I hit it for that long, you are a liar Roman Reigns, it is Thursday which means our flight is in a few hours now get packed. We're going to Jerusalem to get you healed of cancer," Seth said and Roman showed him a Rusev Day calendar and pointed to today's date.
"See right there next to Rusev's head? Its Friday the First, we missed our flight to Jerusalem a week and a day ago," Roman said and Seth snatched the calendar out of Roman's hand.
"I couldn't have," Seth said in disbelief.
"But you did and you enjoyed every minute of it, well done brother you finally found the right woman to lose your viriginity to. Any woman that can keep up with you in the bedroom is a keeper as far as I'm concerned and Sacha held her own," Roman said.
"What are you talking about Roman, where is Sacha how could she let me miss our flight so we could make love all week long?!" Seth said and he grabbed his cell-phone and sent Banks an angry text. "I hope you're sore as Hell," he said in his text message and Roman grabbed the phone and deleted it before it could reach Sacha.
"You cannot say that to your wife, and I'm sure she's got more to give you so you better be nice to her; you have someone to come home to now, don't blow it because of me," Roman said and Seth pouted.
"But that was the only day I had free, now we're never going to get to Jerusalem and heal you of cancer," Seth said and Roman smiled at Seth's determination for him to be healed.
"Thanks brother that means a lot to me," he said and Seth got an idea his face lighting up like a light bulb. "What are you thinking?"
"I'm thinking instead of going to Jerusalem, let's just do it right here in the USA!" Seth said. "We'll go to Bethesda right here in America, Jesus still has to show up no matter where we go right? So he'll go to whatever Bethesda we can get to,"
"Is there a pool in Bethesda, Ohio?" Roman said thinking of the only Bethesda nearby. "I don't think there is Seth,"
"Look I'm out of options and I have to work with whatever I got. Sometimes you just gotta name it and claim it Roman and I decree that there will be a pool at Bethesda, Ohio where an angel will show up to heal you from cancer tonight!" Seth said.
"So do I still have to pack?" Roman said.
"No leave your stuff, Bethesda is just a few miles from here. We'll go after breakfast, I hope you guys left me some pancakes," Seth said taking Roman by the shoulders and heading to the breakfast lounge where everyone was waiting for them.
Meanwhile back in New York City...
Sacha Banks was eating breakfast too, only she was with Alexa Bliss and Ember Moon, her new two best friends. Alexa had given her a breakdown of what was going on with Bayley; since Seth and Sasha got married, Bayley had all but disappeared off the face of the planet.
"So you've forgiven her have you?" Alexa asked Sacha who nodded.
"Yeah I promised Seth I would and I don't want to make my husband upset with me. Especially since he's a Christian now and I have to respect his wishes," Sacha said and Ember Moon frowned.
"Is there an or else at the end of that sentence?" she asked Sacha as the Boss sipped her black coffee.
"Or else, Roman doesn't get healed of cancer and I go to Hell for being a hateful person who cared more about her own ego than about the wellbeing of one of the best guys in the whole world. At least that's how Seth puts it," Sacha explained.
"Is that how you feel for real though?" Alexa asked Sacha who nodded.
"I mean I'm still really mad but on the inside I know Seth's right, plus I believe in God too and He is very clear about forgiveness and how important it is to forgive others when they hurt you. Forgiveness means so much to God, He put it in the Lord's Prayer. Also when your husband stays up all night praying for his friend and makes love he deserves my agreement to forgive Bayley. I've never seen a man pray so hard in my life, if Roman's not healed by this weekend I won't know how Seth will react," Sacha said and Ember furrowed her brow.
"So what you're saying is Roman is more important to Seth than you are?" she asked Sacha bluntly and Sacha shook her head.
"No I'm not saying that, you see, Seth's got a gift now. He got it when Randy Orton and John Morrison prayed for him. If you pray for anything Seth can tell you if your prayer has been answered or not. He knew that if I didn't forgive Bayley Roman wasn't going to get healed of cancer," Sacha explained and Ember and Alexa gasped in shock.
"That is so cool!" Alexa said. "Speaking of Bayley, she's been spending a lot of time at NXT with Shayna Bazler and her crew. She's started wearing black, tight black skinny jeans and vest tops and heavy metal jewelery and big black boots, still with the side ponytail though. To be fair, she looks awesome but I'm not saying that what she did to you on your wedding night was okay because it wasn't. Do you know how long it takes men to get images of naked women out of their heads? Bayley wants Seth to remember her naked forever, she really hates you Sacha. To think all this time she wanted Seth and she didn't tell you,"
Sacha sighed, "Bayley always had a crush on Seth but she never did anything about it. I'm sure he would have dated her if she just made her feelings known, I wouldn't have stopped them, I want my friends to be happy I don't own who Seth falls in love wtih," she said. "I'll tell you something though he is not in love with Bayley and he probably never will be the same toward her now. Seth's used to girls ripping their clothes off in front of him or sending him naked photos, you should see the stuff on his phone. There are some desperate women out there guys,"
"Hey the photo I sent him was classy, I mean sure I was coming out of the shower but I had it filtered so it looked funny as opposed to sexy," Alexa said.
"Yeah and the one I sent him was in the dark with my eyes glowing, you couldn't even see my body," Ember said and Sacha rolled her eyes at them.
"Come on you guys be serious, Bayley is obviously going through some serious mental issues I need to get in touch with her. Will you come with me to NXT to talk to her?" Sacha asked Alexa and Ember.
"But she hates you Sacha, you married Seth Rollins and made me your maid of honor. She's not over that yet even if you have forgiven her," Alexa said. "If I were you I'd forget about Bayley and stay as far away from her as possible,"
"Why would I do that?" Sacha asked Alexa who lowered her eyes like she knew something that Sacha didn't know.
"I have sources in NXT and this source who shall not be named says that Bayley is plotting against you, to bring you down and destroy you so that you can no longer be in the business," Alexa said and Sacha couldn't believe it. "No this source also sent Seth a naked photo so you might wanna bear that in mind, she is however a very reliable source of NXT information and I doubt she made that stuff about Bayley trying to destroy you up,"
"Well there's only one way for me to find out and that's go to to NXT and see Bayley and ask her face-to-face. Please guys I need the support, I don't think I can go there by myself," Sacha pleaded.
"Take Seth with you," Ember said.
"Yeah that's a great idea, why don't you rip off his clothes, cover him in steak sauce and throw him in the lion's den?" Alexa said to Ember.
"Steak sauce?" Ember asked Alexa.
"You're right just Seth alone would be enough, nix the sauce and nix this idea," Alexa said to Sacha.
"I can't take Seth because he's going to Jerusalem with Roman and Dean. Please guys this is my only way to find out what's going on with Bayley. Maybe I can fix it, I just need to know what I did wrong," Sacha said.
"You didn't do anything wrong, Sacha come on she hates you can't you be satified with that?" Alexa said and Sacha clutched her heart.
"No, she's my best friend in the whole world besides you guys,
I need answers and I want them before Seth gets back from Jerusalem with Roman," Sacha said and Ember and Alexa nodded.
"Okay we'll go with you to NXT to see Bayley," Ember said and Alexa sighed.
"I'd rather be in Jerusalem," Alexa said.
"Why? All Seth's going to be doing in praying, I guarantee you he won't be naked at any point," Sacha said and Alexa thumped her fist on the table annoyed.
"Not even when he gets into the pool at Bethesda?" she said and Ember laughed while Sacha shook her head.
"If you saw Seth naked as often as I do these days you'd be in the pool permanently," Sacha said.
"Yeah keep bragging Banks, God boy would rather pray than make love to you anyway," Alexa teased Sacha.
"I would rather be with a man that loves to pray than a man that doesn't have any relationship with God whatsoever and you can take that to the bank," Sacha said and Ember and Alexa smiled as Sacha licked the foam off of her spoon.
"You were licking that spoon a little hard," Ember observed. "Anything on your mind?"
"I'll tell you on the flight to Orlando, come on ladies let's go see Bayley," Sacha said and Alexa and Ember left with her and headed to JFK airport only to be hit with news of major delays with all flights out of New York City.
"You guys are going to have to stay put I'm afraid," Trish Stratus said seeing them at the airport along with Amy. "Melina can't get back to Egypt because all the flights have been grounded,"
"What, why are we still dealing with this? I thought you said that you fixed that witch of the Hudson River who was causing all these problems with our transportation?" Alexa asked Trish.
"We did but she's upped the ante, looks like you guys are going to need a little Divine assistance in getting to Orlando to see Bayley," Trish said and she called Beth Hardy and asked her to Transcend Sacha, Alexa and Ember to Orlando, Florida which she did. Moments later Sacha, Alexa and Ember were in the hot Orlando sun while ATM were in the shivering New York cold.
"We have got to get to the bottom of this Truth, why is the witch of the Hudson River still here? We've been praying for days for her to get out of here," Amy asked Trish.
"I don't know what's keeping her here but as soon as God tells me what's going on we can get rid of her once and for all," Trish said.
"I sure hope God tells you soon, I need to get back to Egypt and stop the coup from going down in Cairo," Melina said. "If we can't fly outta New York, why don't we drive to Boston and spend time with the Brain?"
"You mean you don't want to go to the healing pool at Bethesda, Ohio?" Trish said and Melina frowned.
"The healing pool at Bethesda, Ohio?" Melina asked confused.
"Trust me you guys do not want to miss this," Trish said and she explained to Amy and Melina what she meant as they drove to Ohio leaving the witch of the Hudson River behind for the time being.
What God didn't tell Trish was that leaving New York City was the worst thing they could have done as there was not guarantee that once they left they would be able to return.