Chapter Twenty Six:

He grabbed her hand and held it firmly.

"I love you…I don't want to hurt you but if I let you leave here without finishing this then that's what I will be doing. Sara, you have to let this go…talk with me," he said forcing her to look at him. "You have to do this for yourself…for us…for the baby. You can talk with William alone …."

"No!"

"Then I'll be there with you…or you can talk with me now…just you and me," he said caressing the middle of her palm.

"I uhm…can't," she said.

"Remove yourself. It's a case. Tell me the details…no names…just what happened," he said.

She glanced at him.

"We should start dinner," she said.

He let her go.

He stood there in the kitchen beside her as they threw together something light for dinner. Her appetite was good. She even went for seconds and then retreated to the couch.

"Going to miss the solitude," she said. "Sitting here by the fire…hearing the waves outside…slipping out at any time for a walk on the beach," she said.

"Hank will be glad you're home. He's missed being turned loose in the park," he said.

"You should turn him loose," she said. "He would come back."

"I'll wait and test that theory when you're home," he said.

She half smiled as she stared into the fire. "Feels so warm…nice…not cold," she said.

"I could get you a blanket," he offered.

"No…thanks," she said.

"Sara?"

"Hmmm?"

"Did it happen in San Francisco or Las Vegas?"

She looked confused for a moment but then knew what he was trying to do.

"San Francisco."

"On the job or…."

"both."

He sucked in air as he sat down trying hard not to let his emotions creep into his voice.

"Explain."

"We were working on a case…suspect could not be located…we had been tracking him for weeks…getting closer and closer and then we were finally able to identify him. A warrant was issued. We were waiting for him to be spotted and picked up. He spotted us instead."

"He'd been watching the lab?"

"He'd been watching us go back and forth to the crime scene."

"Why…"

"The first time we were rushed out because of the fire…we were forced to leave but then we were given the okay in a couple of days to return and see if we could find anything…found mostly charred office equipment….not much except I located a couple of prints…it belonged to…the suspect. We ran it and got a name…definitely fit the M.O…arrest warrant was issued. We thought it was the end," she said.

"What happened?" he said quietly.

"He followed us….guess he figured it would be a matter of time before he was picked up. We used to stop off at this place for dinner every evening. We kind of were celebrating that we had broken the case," she said.

"Your partner?"

"Just another CSI…we were assigned from time to time. We were both a bit gun ho about the job," she said.

"You were young…probably just out of the academy," he said.

"I'd been a CSI for two years" she said. "Tim was new…just got married."

"He followed you…what happened?"

"We'd work a double….tired…hadn't slept much that week because of the case. I had driven that day. Tim's wife had to use the car because hers was having problems. I dropped him off and then drove home. I didn't know that he…he was waiting for Tim. He had already gotten there several hours before…Tim's wife had been dead about an hour when Tim walked in and found her. He uhm killed Tim…slowly." She glanced at Grissom for a moment. "Greg reminds me of Tim…always joking. They wouldn't let me see his body but I knew it had been brutal…the rumors in the office along with the looks and stares." She gulped and returned her gaze toward the fire. "I had been home for a couple of hours. I had eaten something and then gone to bed. I uhm turned on the stereo…I used to listen to music…it helped me to fall asleep. It's what woke me. It was louder than I remembered. I got up and went to it. I reached to turn it off when I noticed the sticky substance on the knob. It was blood."

She stopped as she continued to stare into the fire.

"Sara…"

"It's strange when your work seeps into your personal life. For the life of me, I stood there and wondered how the blood got there and before I could react, I felt…hands grabbing me. I instantly smelled copper. I tried to bite him. I wanted to vomit when I realized the odor was coming from his hand that covered my mouth. I tried to kick him and felt myself being thrown to the floor. The air was knocked out of me and then I felt a sharp kick in the ribs. It was a great shot…three broken ribs. I struggled to get to my revolver that was sitting on the counter and felt myself being kicked once more. I must have passed out because I don't remember…I mean I don't think I would have gone willingly to the bedroom…it's where I woke. My wrists hurt. He held me down waiting for me to wake. I was told it was better if I struggled. I did. Griss, I know I should have stopped struggling but I couldn't. He liked it…he told me I was better than Tim's wife. She just screamed and screamed until he broke her neck. It was then I learned that Tim and his wife were dead. I was next."

She stopped again and he was glad. He wanted her to stop. He wanted to make her stop talking and tell her to never talk about it again. He wanted nothing more than to erase it from her memory as he watched her slowly sink back into the past and was now acting as an observer to a horrific scene. He was quiet for a long time not sure if they should continue or leave the rest of it until tomorrow but then the thought of having to go through it was too much to bear.

"Sara…"

"They missed us at work and then there were the neighbors who spotted blood on the sidewalk that led them to call the police. They were found…Tim and his wife. There was the matter of me. I was always on time so they sent a patrol car to check. I remember hearing the banging on the door and then he was back in the room and I was ready to die but then there was gunfire and then he was falling on the bed and I was telling myself, I would soon find out how difficult it was going to be to remove blood stains from walls. I made it to the bathroom before vomiting at least. I uhm pulled out some dirty clothes from the hamper and dressed while the officer banged on the door until I thought my head would explode. He watched as I grabbed my field kit and began setting up evidence markers throughout the house. He left me alone to work. I sat down when my supervisor arrived and I told him it was almost done. I had stacked up the evidence bags along the wall. There wouldn't be much work. The man was dead….lying in my bed…never could sleep much in a bed after that…couch was better. The case was closed. My boss wanted to protect me from the news media. There was nothing to be gained from having it plastered all over the news how an ex cop had managed to elude the police for months killing six women and then a CSI and his wife…and…he left it up to me. I didn't want anyone to know. I just wanted it to go away. Nothing would change what had happened. They told me there was no need for a report…he was dead…but then William got the report…it wasn't supposed to exist."

"Sara…."

"Is that enough? Can I go home?" she asked without looking.

He couldn't breathe. He quickly knelt on the floor in front of her. He did not mean to frighten her but he did. She pushed him away as soon as his hands came near her. It was the pain in her eyes and the plea of apology that made him gather her into his arms.

"That's enough," he whispered. "That's enough."

His embrace was short lived as she pushed him away running to the bathroom. It was the retching that made him curse. He tried the door but it was locked. He could hear her struggling to breathe between bouts of nausea followed by the retching and then gasps once more. The sobs came and he began to knock. His knocking turned to pounding when she did not unlock the door. He stopped suddenly and listened. The sobs were gone.

"Sara?"

He heard the water turn on and he could hear movement. He stood there and eventually the door clicked and he stepped inside quickly.

"You okay?"

She sat there now on the edge of the tub.

"Sara?"

"I uhm don't feel well," she managed to get out. "No more please."

He had her back in bed in his arms within minutes. He rocked her telling her it was over and then he soothingly hushed her to sleep. She couldn't. She lay there feeling herself nod off only to jerk herself awake. He would rub her back and attempting to coax her to sleep only to have the same thing happen again and again until she finally got up and went to the kitchen to make some tea. Her hands trembled and she grasped the cup firmly to hide it but he knew. He knew she suffered. She crawled into a ball on the couch and attempted to sleep but it did not come. By morning, she was completely exhausted and she wanted nothing more than to sleep but it remained elusive.

William arrived.

Sara was now in the bathroom soaking in the tub. Grissom hoped it would help her to relax so that she could fall asleep. Grissom sat there in the living room and told him about their conversation.

"This is good," William said.

"It's enough," said Grissom. "I'm not putting her through anything more. She can't sleep. She's completely exhausted but she can't seem to shut down."

"I could give her something."

"She doesn't want to take anything because of the baby."

"She may need to just for a night or two….once her body sleeps again it will be easier the next night."

William stared at her when she walked into the room. She said nothing as she returned to the couch.

"Heard you couldn't sleep," he said softly.

"I'm not up to talking," she said.

"I could give you something," he offered.

She shook her head quickly.

"Sara, you need to sleep," said Grissom.

"I don't want to risk…." she said.

"It won't harm the baby," William said quickly. "I promise."

William disappeared for a moment but returned. He retrieved a glass of water from the kitchen and then handed it to Sara along with a pill. She took it. He patted her arm.

"You did good Kid," he said with a smile. He bent over and kissed her lightly on the forehead.

"If you need me, you call," he said getting up to leave.

"William?" she called suddenly.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you," she said.

"Come see me before you leave," he said.

She nodded.

She lay there now watching the flames dance about. Grissom took his seat by the fire opening his book and began to read out loud. He glanced every now and then and was happy when her eyelids began to flutter. Soon she was asleep. He continued to read for awhile forcing his mind to concentrate on the words rather than the events that had taken place. He knew he should sleep as well but at the moment, he just wanted to sit there by her side, knowing that she was getting the rest she needed.

He made coffee.

He pulled out his phone and called Brass.

He needed to talk with someone.

He listened like he always did.

Once Grissom was done, the silence remained on the phone.

"Jim?"

"Bring her home, Gil."

"I am. We'll be home in a few days….don't tell the others. I think she's going to need some time alone before they start coming…"

"No sharing of problems. Sara doesn't need them dumping that crap as soon as she gets back."

"I agree," said Grissom.

"Stay in touch," said Brass.

Note from author:

Thanks for the reviews. I've really enjoyed them between bouts of yelling at my p.c. LOL.

Take care,

Penny