A/N: so this chapter is mostly fluffy and bromance-y :3 I figured it was needed after the shitload of angst I've been dumping on all of you as of recent chapters haha. Yeah, the cliffhanger in the last chapter wasn't really... planned. It kind of just happened and Kendall has a lot of issues he needs to work out, and James and Carlos need to help him (and he needs to let them). So after making Kendall break down, I figured I should bring him back up, just a little haha. I'm cruel, I know. But don't let this angst break fool you; there will be more angst coming soon in this story! But until that happens, enjoy this chapter! I don't own anything.

Chapter Twenty-Five
I can hear your prayers, your burdens I will bear. But first I need your hand, then forever can begin. Everyday I sit and ask myself, how did love slip away? Something whispers in my ear and says that you are alone, I am here with you. Though you're far away, I am here to say. - Michael Jackson, 'You Are Not Alone"

James couldn't tell you what he was doing when he got Kendall's frantic phone call; all he could say was that the second Kendall told him he needed him, he was out of the Knight house faster than ever. Since the Knights only had two cars - both of which were in use right now, not that it mattered to James, he couldn't drive anyway - he took it upon himself to run to Kendall's store, knowing exactly where it was. And run he did, as fast as he could; moving faster than all the years he had spent on the ice. Whatever the problem was, James didn't know, but he wasn't about to be too late when Kendall needed him.
In decent time, James made it to the supermarket, a little out of breath, but immediately scanning the parking lot for Kendall's car. When he spotted it, he made a break for it, rushing up to the driver's side, tapping on the window. "Kendall? Dude, open up!"

He startled the blonde a little, but Kendall started to wipe his face and with shaky hands, he opened the door, throwing himself into James' arms. "Hurts," was all the brunette could make out through his rough sobs.

"Shh, shh, it's okay," James soothed him, a comforting hand rubbing circles in his back. "It's okay, just breathe it's okay."

"Hurts," the blonde whimpered again, gripping tighter onto James' shirt, trying to force the air in and out of his lungs in a way that was positively painful.

"I know," James whispered, even through he didn't. But at the same time… he kind of did. "Shh, shh, look at me Kendall," reluctantly, James broke their tight embrace and held Kendall at arm's length, "Just breathe, it's okay." he told him. "Like me, in and out." James talked Kendall through his panic attack, calming him down until he was breathing normally again and the blonde simply collapsed forward into James' arms, tears still sliding down his cheeks. "There you go, you're okay," James whispered to him, cradling him in his arms. "You're okay," he whispered that to him over and over again.

"Don't go," Kendall whimpered, his own voice pathetic to his ears. But at the moment, he couldn't find himself to care; he just wanted James, and Carlos, and Logan - he wanted his friends.

"I'm not going anywhere," James promised him, tightening his grip around Kendall. "Talk to me, tell me what's wrong Kendall,"

Kendall sniffled, burying his face in the crook of James' neck. "Everything hurts." he said hoarsely. "Please… take care of me."

"Of course," James whispered to him. He couldn't deny that this whole thing was taking him a bit by surprise; Kendall never needed anyone to take care of him, nor did he want anyone to. It was always the other way around, Kendall the rock, Kendall the controller, Kendall the one who always took care of anyone who would let him. Kendall never admitted he needed someone else… until now. But James promised he would take care of him, and that he did. He gently broke their hug so he could take Kendall's laptop and move it to the backseat of the car, before he climbed into the seat with him and pulled him back into their tight embrace. Kendall was shaking and sniffling, but James didn't let go for a second.

Almost twenty minutes had passed since James first arrived to Kendall's car, amidst the other boy's panic attack. After calming him down, James held Kendall until he cried himself dry and the two sat together in silence, Kendall occasionally sniffling but not offering James any explanation. The blonde boy clung to his friend, fingers desperately entangled in the fabric of James' shirt with no intentions of letting go. He was practically in James' lap, but the other boy didn't seem to mind their close encounter; whatever made Kendall feel better.

"Does it still hurt?" James asked him softly, his hand rubbing comforting circles in Kendall's back, hoping to ease away the tension.

"Kind of." he whispered hoarsely, his head resting on James' shoulder, still holding on to his friend tightly as if he expected James to just leave him.

"Can you tell me why it hurts?" James asked him, biting down on his bottom lip. He wanted to, needed to, help Kendall, make him feel better. He wanted to make it stop hurting… he needed to. But above all, he needed to know why it hurt. Kendall sighed, pressing his face deeper into James's shoulder, still not saying anything. "Please?" James pleaded with him softly. "Talk to me Kendall."

Kendall sighed again, and finally uttered, "Can we call Carlos first? I, um, I want to talk to you both… together."

"Okay," James said slowly. "Um, did you want to just drive up to the hospital?"

Kendall shook his head, licking his lips. "I'll lose my nerve by then." he replied. "Just… can we call him?" he asked again.

"Of course," reluctantly, James opened the car door, climbing out of Kendall's seat and walked around to the other side of the car while Kendall grabbed his laptop from the back seat and turned it on.

Luckily, Skype was showing Carlos as one of Kendall's online friends and the blonde immediately called him. The annoying Skype tone echoed throughout the otherwise silent car as Kendall frantically wiped at his face, trying to rid himself of any and all tears. James reached out for him, rubbing a comforting hand across his shoulders. "Hey, guys!" Carlos' voice was happy and welcoming, but his tone changed immediately when he saw that Kendall was… crying? "What's wrong? Is everything okay?"

James didn't say anything, just side glanced to Kendall, and the blonde sighed heavily, I kind of really need you both," Kendall felt a fresh wave of tears filling up in his eyes and he pleaded with himself not to start crying again.

"Okay," Carlos said slowly, not understanding where all of this was coming from or where he was going with this.

Kendall must've sensed his confusion because after that he blurted out, "I watched my video today." James and Carlos went silent, waiting for Kendall to continue. The blonde exhaled shakily, looking down at his hands twitching nervously in his lap. "I watched my video," he repeated quietly. "And… Logan told me that I need to let other people take care of me. And I guess he's right because… well, he's Logan; he's always right. But I really need you guys to…" Kendall sighed again, rubbing the back of his neck. "I don't even know where I'm going with this, I just really need you guys."

"Talk to us, Kendall." James encouraged him.

"Please?" Carlos added. "We can't help you if we don't know what's wrong."

Kendall bit his lip, fighting back a groan. "That's just the thing; I don't know what's wrong with me!" he exclaimed, his fingers running through his hair so angrily that the boys thought he was going to actually rip his hair out. "I'm just… I'm losing my mind or something! I'm just stressed and I'm not sleeping, and I can't…" Kendall's chest fight tight, like another panic attack was coming. "I can't fix everything," he whispered pathetically.

"Kendall, you don't have to fix everything," Carlos insisted.

"But I need to!" the blonde replied immediately. "I need to fix everything and make everything better - that's what I do!"

"Kendall, you weren't put on this earth to solve everyone's problems," James told him gently, rubbing his shoulders again. "You have to just let some things be."

"But… but when - if I don't fix everything, bad things happen," Kendall stuttered.

"Yeah, but it's not your fault!" Carlos told him. "None of it is-"

"Logan's dead, and that's my fault." Kendall interrupted quietly. "You're in the hospital, and that's my fault too; because I couldn't fix everything like I'm supposed to,"

"Kendall, don't you get it?" James asked. "It's not your job to fix everything. And sometimes, things happen that you can't fix; you just need to accept that." Kendall didn't say anything, and James sighed. "Look, I don't know what Logan told you in your video… but if I had to guess it was something along the lines of, it's not totally your fault."

"You watched yours?" Carlos asked James.

The brunette nodded. "Kendall told me you were going to watch yours and I kind of got curious about mine. So I just… did it. Like ripping-"

"Ripping off a band aid." Carlos finished for him with a small chuckle. "Figures we all watch ours in the same day," Kendall finally managed a weak smile, and Carlos took that as a victory on their part. "But James is right; yeah it was out fault Logan got depressed, but the most important thing is that we remember he still loves us. I don't know why or how, but he loves us."

"And he's in a better place now." James added. "I bet he's happier wherever he is." Kendall bit down on his lip, hesitating a bit but nodded in agreement. "So don't blame yourself," James told him. "Look, I know it's hard for you to just let everything happen and not do anything, but sometimes you need to just relax,"

Kendall let out a humorless chuckle. "When do I ever relax, James?" he asked, semi-sarcastically. "I'm just a psycho control freak and I'll never change."

"Your hair's gonna fall out if you don't," Carlos pointed out.

Kendall chuckled again, but ran his fingers through his hair subconsciously. Just to make sure. "I know… like I said, I just don't know how to calm down or whatever. Especially now that everything's just… nothing seems to be getting better guys," Kendall sighed heavily. "Everything's a mess, and I don't know what to do."

James sighed, pulling Kendall into a one armed hug, and the blonde rested his head on James' shoulder. "I'm sorry Kendall," he told him softly. "I feel like… it's my fault that you're so messed up. I mean, I doubt it helped anything when you and I kept on fighting."

"And me dumping all my problems on you didn't help either," Carlos added dejectedly.

"Guys - no!" Kendall sat up immediately upon hearing that. "You can't blame yourselves that I'm so weak,"

"Kendall don't say that." Carlos said. "You can't think that way."

"But it's t-"

"Don't say that it's true because it's not," the Latino cut in immediately. "I mean… you know what happened to Logan when he started getting down on himself."

James bit his lip at Carlos' words. "He's right though," he agreed. "I'm sure me and Logan are prime examples of what happens when you do that," he added, subconsciously running his fingers over his wrist.

Kendall sighed for what felt like the millionth time. "You guys are right… I'm sorry," he mumbled. "I just… I really need you guys more than ever. You are the only ones who understand what I'm going through and how I'm feeling - even when I don't understand how I'm feeling. And you're the only ones that can make me feel a little bit better, and I…I don't want to lose you guys again," the blonde whispered.

"Hey," Carlos caught his attention and Kendall raised his head to meet his eyes through the computer screen. "We aren't going anywhere Knight. We might have screwed up once, but not again."

James slung his arm around Kendall's shoulders again. "Not again," he repeated.

And with their words, the tension started to melt away from Kendall's chest once again. This time, he was almost positive it was gone for good.