A/N- Here's Chapter 26, love! I hope you really, really like it!
I know I did. (;
Oh, and this Chapter is quite long...
Chapter 26-
What Marlene said really got me down. I could still remember what it felt like when she said all that mean stuff to my face. I hadn't told anyone- not Lily, James, Remus, Sev, Alice or anybody! Not even Sirius. For some reason, I felt like I should tell him. But you know what? Forget it.
It's all okay.
And it will stay that way.
Today wasn't as bad as I had thought it would be. After all, the dance was tonight.
Lily was in my dorm, massaging her face with some moisturizing cream while sitting at my vanity. Jenna was in here to, currently in the shower.
I didn't mind it or really pay attention to it, but Jenna sings in the shower. I could hear her through the door. And, if you ask me, she's really not that bad.
I had just gotten out of the shower, my hair wrapped in a towel. I sat on my bed, looking through the latest issue of Quidditch Monthly.
I picked this magazine up every now and then. Sirius introduced it to me, actually. It's basically just full of posters and articles and stuff about the best Quidditch players, the hottest Quidditch players, and the worst Quidditch Players. A lot of time sit interviews them, and there's always a few pages dedicated to the new line of Quidditch accessories, including balls and brooms. Great read, it is.
The first page was only a picture of Sierra Anderson. She had short honey blonde hair and warm hazel eyes. She was very pretty. I looked under her interview column, and what a read made me feel a little bit better.
"I used to get teased a lot when I went to school.
All the other kids weren't so approving of a girl
who was five feet and six inches in her second
year. By seventh year, I was six feet. All my girl
friends encouraged me and told me I was pretty
and what not, which helped a little, but it wasn't
enough- you know, to make me feel beautiful. But
then I learned that it's really all about self-loving.
Not being arrogant or anything, just accepting you
for you. You will always see yourself as a little less
prettier than someone really else sees you. You have
to love and accept yourself if you really want to be
beautiful. And now look at me- I'm six feet and 2 extra
inches, beautiful as ever."
-Sierra
Bleh. That doesn't imply to all of us, does it? Well, maybe it does. With an exception of moi.
Lily glanced at me from the corner of her eye, which she kept doing. I pretended not to notice, but then she turned around and stared at me.
"Hm?" I asked, not looking up from my magazine.
"Emi, is there something wrong?" she asked seriously, not looking away from me or blinking or anything. I looked up at her and hesitated, but caught myself.
"No." I said. "Why?" I asked after a minute of silence.
"Well, you've seemed a little blue. Me and James were going to say something on the ride back from Hogsmede, but we didn't want to find out that nothing was wrong and make you think that you looked sad." Lily explained, crossing her legs. I watched her for a minute, tucking my hair behind my ear.
"No, there's nothing wrong. Thank you for worrying though. And asking." I smiled, putting on the warmest one I could. I don't think she bought it, but she turned her chair back around and continued doing whatever it was exactly. It was silent for a moment, until Lily broke it.
"So what shoes are you wearing?" she asked, changing the entire subject. Relief washed over me and I smiled for real.
"Just a pair of normal felt black pumps. You?" I asked.
"Gold heels." She said, her mouth in the shape of an O as she applied some moisturizer around her mouth and cheeks.
"Cute. That dress looks really good on you!" I said, turning the page of my magazine and glancing at her. She smiled.
"Thanks. I haven't seen yours on you, yet. Did anyone ask you to the dance?" she questioned, pinning her hair in a messy bun. She plugged in her own curling iron and waited for it to heat up. Here's Lily, getting herself all dolled up. And here's me, in my bathrobe, sitting on my butt and reading a magazine, hair still wet. Hm.
"Yeah, a guy in his fourth year. I can't remember his name though…" I said. He really had- it was a guy with really fluffy blonde hair and pretty blue eyes, a few inches taller than me. He wasn't built like James or Sirius- he was really thin. I don't think he told me his name, honestly.
"And you said no? Saving yourself for Sirius?" she winked. Lily knew about Marlene going with him, but she said that he probably didn't want to hurt her feelings and that they'd probably only dance once.
"Well, actually think that he just didn't tell me his name. But yeah, I said no. It would be kind of weird to just dance with somebody who's name I didn't even know. And…yeah. You guessed it." I said, giving a slight laugh. Lily nodded sincerely. I think she bought it.
"You guys are so cute…" Lily sighed dreamily. I furrowed my brows.
"What do you mean?" I asked, turning the page of my magazine again. I didn't even read the page I was on before, though.
"Well…you know, you guys are just cute. You act like you don't like him, even though most of us know you do, and Sirius is head over heels for you. He follows you around like a lost puppy, Emi." Lily smiled. Right. He's head over heels for me- which is why he's going to dance with Marlene and not me. I stared down at my red-painted nails for a minute.
Alright, that's wrong of me…I can't blame him for this mess. Is it my fault?
It has to be my fault! Did I say something rude to Marlene? Or did she imply that this ordeal was because of my decline to her offer of joining her group of friends? I can't even remember! Godric!
"Sirius- head over heels for me?" I said to myself. Lily must have thought I was talking to her.
"Pssh! Yes, of course! I guess you don't ever really notice…because you're not looking…but he's always looking at you. Not to make him sound like a creeper or anything- he's just always, well, watching you. Kind of like he's making sure you don't get into any trouble." Lily laughed. "And you know how our last hour class isn't with Sirius or James now? I heard Sirius begging James to go that you- so he could be around you! Their class is clear on the other side of Hogwarts." She explained. I felt my face go pink.
"W-why does he like me of all people?" I asked, slightly harsher than I intended it to be. Lily ignored it and only shook her head.
"Surely you know!" she smiled. At that exact moment, Jenna hurried out of the shower and started getting ready in a snap. I put my magazine on the bedside table and went into the bathroom to dry my hair.
When I came out, Lily's hair was curled and she was ready. Jenna was already gone.
"Mind if I check out your magazine? I'm not big on Quidditch, but I need something to pass the time." She smiled. I nodded and got my dress out of closet. I carefully slipped it on and flattened all the creases. I quickly stepped into my heels and then I took a seat at my vanity.
I pinned my hair in a neat bun, a few curls falling around my face. I put on some pretty red lipstick and then I spritzed some body spray on. This stuff only took about thirty minutes.
"Alright, Lily, are you ready?" I asked. She stood up, stretched, and nodded.
"Yup. You look fabulous." She said. We linked arms and left my dorm, made our way through the crowded common room, and headed to the Great Hall.
The Great Hall was the room where the big event was held, also where you could find the punch and snacks and the soundtrack list. The room beside it, which we commonly just called the Half Hall (It's seriously about half the size of the Great Hall), was where everyone just hung around and talked.
I didn't realize it, but we were kind of late. The Great Hall was crowded (and the Half Hall was mostly empty) and the music was blaring. In the far left corner of the Great Hall was Sirius- who, oddly enough, was wearing a gold sequined shirt under a blazer. He looked cute…but it wasn't meant for him. He's a nerdy kind of dresser, not a chic/profiling dresser. That was definitely Marlene's doing. Marlene herself was in a long gold sequined dress that had a slit on the side so you could see her leg when she took a step. Her hair was down, straight and sleek. The rest of the girls around her, who actually followed her every step, were close to the same.
Within minutes, Lily was whisked away with Alice and her other friends, leaving me to stand alone. That is, until Daniel motioned for me to come over to himself, Marcus, and Brandon.
"Hey, guys." I smiled. Don't you all look handsome?" Brandon's face got red, along with Marcus'.
"We do, we do…But it's obvious that I'm the one who look the hottest." Daniel said.
"I didn't say anyone was hot, Daniel!" I shook my head, lightly punching him in the arm. He laughed and took a sip out of his cup.
"You better save us each a dance, Lupin." Daniel winked. I rolled my eyes.
"Don't worry, I will." I said, nodding.
"I'm serious, push away all those other guys. Me first." He said, jabbing his thumb into his chest.
"Okay, okay!" I laughed. Brandon and Marcus looked around awkwardly, while Daniel kept striking different poses.
After a conversation about Quidditch, and how we were definitely going to win the House Cup, I dove into the crowd again. But the next thing I know, I'm dancing with Gideon Prewett, who just so happens to twirl me around until I bump into his brother, Fabian. Fabian dips backwards and I'm cast off to Daniel- actually taken by Daniel- as a slow songs tarts to play.
I look at Daniel with a close eye.
"Daniel, do you even know how to dance?" I asked, laughing as he nearly tripped. I moved my feet just in time before he could step on them, but I had to constantly look down. He laughed.
"Nope! Care to teach me? You seem like you know what you're doing." He chuckled.
"Alright, just follow my lead…" He nodded. "1...2...3...1…2…3…1…2…3…" I repeated this a series of times until he finally got it right without my help.
"I'm pretty good at this!" He said, complimenting himself. I giggled and we danced in a happy sort of silence until the song was over. Daniel patted my shoulder.
"Thanks, champ." Daniel said, waving a 'see-you-later'. I did the same and smiled. Then, I was back in the crowd, dancing with random people, drinking punch, until someone bumped into me from behind. I turned around only to find Marlene staring at me, her eyes burning a hole through me. I was speechless, and when I was about to say something, she cut me off.
"Hm, so you actually showed up." she sneered. She looked me up and down and frowned. I was quiet. "That looks like something you'd wear in the forties." She said, shaking her head. I didn't know what to say, so I just let her go on. "And you try and wear some make-up for once. Maybe then you won't look as dreadful as usual." Marlene's make-up was caked on. I mean…
Pan-cake.
I stood there, trying to keep my mouth closed. She took up the opportunity to end the conversation by saying one last thing.
"Wouldn't everything be easier if you had decided to be my friend, and not Lily's?" With that said, she turned on her heel and walked away from me. I took a deep breath in and almost crushed my punch cup. Lily glanced at me- she was a few crowds over. I think she'd seen the whole scene.
Honestly, I wanted to cry. And I almost did, but somehow I managed to keep myself…normal. I shuffled through the crowds of people and made my way through the Half Hall. I quickly paced through a few halls, down a few corridors, and up a few flights of stairs.
Finally, I came to a door I was quite familiar with. I slowly opened it and slipped inside, sighing in relief to see the Mirror of Erised.
When you looked into the Mirror of Erised, you could see what you wanted most in the world. Your greatest desires.
I came here whenever I really wanted to see my Mum. When is aw her, she was always with Dad and Remus. I was never there. I clenched my fists and stepped in front of the mirror after looking out the window, which was covered in a frosty glaze. When I looked into the Mirror I didn't see my Mum and Dad and Remus, though…
I saw Sirius.
At first, Sirius smiled and put his arm around me. We were smiling, and laughing, and then…We kissed. It was a quick kiss, but more than a peck on the lips. Then something changed and Sirius held my hand- but I really felt it. I looked down at my hand, and found that my fingers were intertwined with, as I discovered as I looked up, Sirius' fingers- the actual, real life Sirius.
He looked at me sincerely and then to the mirror. Finally, back at me.
"What're you doing in here?" he asked. I glanced at the mirror and then back at him.
"Nothing…" I said after a moment, letting go of his hand. He shook his head.
"What's wrong, Em? You can tell me anything. And don't say that nothing is wrong…" he said worriedly. I shook my head.
"Nothing's wrong." I said, not being able to look into his stormy grey eyes.
"Em, I know you. You think that if you tell someone what's wrong when your sad or hurt or something, you'll just cause them trouble. Trust me- it won't happen. Ever. Just tell me. Do you feel bad? Did someone say something?" he asked, putting his hands on my shoulders.
I finally cracked- a tear or two slipped…and then I couldn't stop and I just let a whole river flow. Sirius pulled me to his chest and stroked my hair.
"It's alright…Shh…" he whispered. He kissed the top of my head. "Just tell me…"
"Lily a-and Marlene got into a fight or something…A-and then Marlene wanted me to be her number one or something… and I-I said that we were-were friends, but you can't just make that stuff happen…" Sirius nodded gently. "And after that she acted like a normal friend…A-And now suddenly she hates me… "
"Did she say something?" he asked quietly. I sniffled and he used his thumb to wipe a tear form my cheek, even though more were coming out anyways. It took me a minute, but I wiped my eyes and slightly collected myself. I was able to talk without sniffling for a few minutes.
"She came up to me...and said some stuff like normal…and then suddenly she acted like she hated me…and she said some more stuff…and called me…ugly...and a backstabber…And she's still doing that…She just did…And I don't why!" I started crying again. My arms, which were at my side since I'd gotten into the room, were suddenly around Sirius. I hardly even noticed it. I just buried my face into his shoulder-the shoulder that I wanted to cry on whenever I needed it- and cried. I cried so hard that I had the hiccups for a second, but then I felt nauseous and then I just kept crying.
Sirius went kind of stiff when I held onto him and he didn't hold me as tight. I sniffed, wiped my eyes and looked up at him.
He looked down at me, his cheeks slightly pink.
"…Em… I'm not sure why anyone would want to do that kind of crap to you. You're the nicest person ever. It's really hard, but believe me- you can't let it get to you. I know how that is- my whole family hates me. I've learned to ignore it." He said. I thought about it for a minute and nodded, wiping my eyes, which Sirius later did for me. " You, especially, shouldn't listen to that stuff."
I glanced up at him curiously, but put my head on his chest again.
"What do you mean?" I sniffed, my voice muffled. Sirius shook his head and pulled away from me, holding my shoulders. We stared into each other's eyes for a minute, not talking, not moving. And for a minute, it was like everything was perfect. There was nothing wrong what-so-ever.
Before I could say something and break the silence, my eyes widened and my face was definitely red. A burning, tingling sensation went through me and my lips were, like, numb…
Sirius Orion Black just kissed me. On the lips.
He pulled away and put his hand on my cheek, wiping one last tear.
"I don't think she hates you. Nobody could hate you, I promise. Your never mean… if you were going to be mean to anyone, it would be to me, because I'm mean. That's one of my many flaws. You, Emileigha, have none. Zero! And she called you ugly? Even I'm shocked that somebody would say that, because you're the most beautiful girl in the world. I swear to God you are. I know I'm not the only one who thinks you are, either- which does happen to drive me bloody insane. Don't ever think you aren't pretty, love. You are. Your gorgeous! And a backstabber? You're my best friend. You've never done anything to me. Lily is your best friend. You've never done anything to her. You didn't do anything to Marlene. It's her problem, actually, that she's fighting with Lily…she really shouldn't bring it to you. That was a good thing to do- say that you guys were still friends, but being best-friends took time. It's not even worth it, to be her friend, if Marlene is going to do this to you. And I think you knew that. But you're a people-pleaser, Em, and you didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings. Hell, sometimes it's a crime to be so sweet." He explained gingerly, smiling. His hand fell to my hand and his fingers intertwined with mine.
I didn't know what to do, so a smile just came to my lips. I still had a few tears in my eyes.
"Have you ever worried about what you want?" he asked curiously. I shook my head. "Well…You've been in here before, haven't you? Looked in the Mirror of Erised?"
"Yeah." I said. Had Sirius been in here?
"What do you see?" he asked. I was quiet and my eyes darted all around the cold room. After a couple of minutes, I looked back at him.
"Sometimes I see Remus, my dad, and my mum. Sometimes I see Remus without his werewolf problem. And once I saw Lily and James with a little boy. They were all really happy." I kind of smiled at the last one. Maybe that'll come true, someday. Sirius even smiled.
"As nice as that must be, you only see people. You only see people who are happy- but you're not there... What did you see tonight? You looked, didn't you?" He asked, brushing my hair behind my shoulder for me. I froze for a second, staring into the mirror. I just saw me and Sirius, together. Was that our real reflection, though? Or was it what I'd seen in the mirror before?
"It's okay if you don't want to share, love." Sirius smiled, squeezing my hand. "Do you want to know what I see?" he asked, turning to the mirror. I nodded.
"I see a beautiful girl with far-set greenish grey eyes and copper hair, in a really cute red dress. And then beside her, holding her hand, I see a pretty nice-looking guy" –he winked at this- "with grey eyes and wavy black hair, in a really stupid shirt." He laughed at his own joke and kissed my cheek. "We're holding hands. And every now and then, you kiss my cheek. That's all I see." He gave one last big smile and squeezed my hand again before letting go. I was silent, looking at the floor.
"Well," He started after a good six or seven minutes of silence, "I'm gonna go up to the Common Room, love. You can come if you want. Take your time. If you decide to come, the password's 'Chocolate Froggy'. Marlene hasn't even talked to me since we've been here. And she actually went with her boyfriends. I'm not misisng anything." he joked, turning to leave. Before he could touch the doorknob, I grabbed his hand.
"I see us, too." I said, almost in a whisper.
"R-really?" He asked, his cheeks getting darker ocne again. I could feel mine burning pink, too. I nodded gently.
"Could you do me a favor, Sirius?" I asked. He nodded.
"Anythig for you, Em." he smiled assuringly. "What is it?"
"Well...you know how during the last dance, we were at the Balck Lake? And we didn't dance?"
"Yes..."
"And this dance...Well, we didnt get to go together..." I said. He nodded again, still blushing. "Will you dance with me?" I smiled up at him. He gave a very happy smile, and took a step back.
"Miss Lupin, may I have this dance?" he asked, bowing. I curtseyed.
"I'd be very much obliged, Mr. Black." He took a step forward and put his hands on my waist. I put my arms around his neck (my heels gave me an extra height boost) and layed my head on his chest.
And there we were, dancing together. I smiled, blushing even harder as Sirius kissed my forehead and laughed.
"You are an excellent dancer, Miss Lupin. And might I say that you look ever so lovely tonight, but as well as every other moment." he whispered.
I looked up at him, laughed, and kissed his cheek.
A/N- This was so much fun to write! I hope you liked it! Thank you for your Reviews! Godric Bless!
Rate, Review, Love! Thanks, dearest! (: