And now it's time for…
Nut Reviews
With Wade Wilson aka; Deadpool
Tonight's Review:
Neo Organization XIII by Ranger24
"HOLY CRAP, THIS IS THE GREATEST FIC EVER!" Deadpool said, bolting in front of the camera.
"Behold…Kingdom SPOILERS!"
Deadpool held in a laugh. "This fic is SO FUNNY! It's like the funniest fic I've ever READ."
"So, there's this guy named Xemnas, who was the leader of Organization XIII but got KILLED by Sora and Riku. And yet Ranger brought him back with NO explanation! HILARIOUS!"
"So, instead of seeking revenge on his murderers, Xemnas…" Deadpool stifled a laugh, "He decides to REBUILD the destroyed Organization! HAHAHAHA! To think a guy who'd just got beaten wants to rebuild rather than seek vengeance!"
"And get this…THIS is a Kingdom Hearts fic, but there's almost NO Kingdom Hearts characters OR Disney elements! AHAHAHAHA!"
"And so, Xemnas, goes off and recruits guys from Star Wars, Battlestar Galactica, Red vs. Blue, Devil May Cry, Hellsing, Death Note, and South Park!"
"SOUTH PARK! As if Kingdom Hearts would ever have a world based off THAT!"
"And so, Xemnas, he-(snicker) He-(snicker) He turns the whole thing into a SCI-FI BATTLE! (bursts out laughing). And those Sasuke and Nero guys are SO FUNNY because they won't stop complaining about everything!"
"Ranger complains about everything, but everyone wants to SHOOT him for it!"
"I shot Ranger ONCE!"
"He cut my balls off…"
"And all these characters are so funny because they act and talk NOTHING like their original selves, bend to Xemnas' will like a cheap spoon, and-(snigger) FLY SPACESHIPS!"
After a nice, hard laugh, Deadpool stopped. "THIS IS THE FUNNIEST FIC EVER! SIXTY STARS! IT'S…"
The cameraman whispered, sharply, to the merc. "Deadpool!"
"Huh-wha?" Deadpool asked in surprise.
(inaudible whispering)
"The camera guy is telling me that Neo Organization XIII is NOT a comedy. It is in fact, a multi-chapter epic…I am most confoosled."
"Really? This was supposed to be taken seriously?" Deadpool said, scratching his head, "O-kay, this is the greatest EPIC ever!"
"I can understand why people call this such an original fic. It has members of Org. XIII surviving and NO ONE'S ever done that before!"
"Except for Dezblade, Darthkingdom, and just about every yaoi fangirl."
"And it has ANIME elements in it and NO fic has that!"
"Except 'Trials of the Keyblade', 'Eighth Princess', and anything by Mrfipp."
"And it has lots of over-the-top action…which just about every good KH fic has had."
"And it's a sequel to Kingdom Hearts II and…LORD KNOWS how many times we've seen THAT!"
"How come people call this fic 'original'? Everything's borrowed from something else! This is most confoosling…"
"Oh, wait! I KNOW! They call it original because there's ABSOLUTELY NOTHING original about it! THAT'S INSPIRED!"
"I SHOULD WRITE A FANFICTION! I HAVE AN IDEA THAT'S EVEN MORE ORIGINAL!"
"It's called 'Sonic the Hedgehog and Indiana Jones fight Godzilla at Helm's Deep'. I'll be called a fanfiction MAVERICK! And you guys just thought I was just some jerk mercenary with NO originality. All I need now is a huge tub of pretentiousness."
"This is Wade Wilson saying…TIPS! GIVE ME TIPS! Come on! I need money for the SEQUEL! 'Sonic the Hedgehog and Indiana Jones fight King Kong and stop the Grinch from stealing Christmas'!"
With apologies to Ranger24…
Seriously, though, Neo Organization XIII LOOKED good, but LORD was it STUPID!