Jackson

The touch of Rosalie's lips on mine sent shivers through my body. The blood my burning throat demanded faded away just long enough for me to regain control.

I began to react to the kiss, returning it instinctively before my brain screamed at me.

We jerked away from each other at the same moment and the air was crowded with our apologies. In the future I hoped we could look back and laugh but for the moment I was horrified. I had done this; my thoughts of my mate had led to an emotional influence over Rosalie which was unforgivable.

Yet she grabbed my hand and dragged me forward, not stopping our southern momentum until we stood at the edge of the water.

"Swim," Rosalie ordered, "I'll follow. Go."

I wished I could drown. I reached the shore of Hagemeister Island and remained in the water, facedown and miserable.

Rosalie grabbed my hair and pulled me up just enough so my ears were free of the water.

"Quit this crap before I rip your arm off and hide it at the bottom of the ocean," she growled. Strangely there was no real aggression in her tone, just frustration.

I crawled out of the water and lay on my back on the shore. Rosalie glared down at me.

"It was one kiss; and not even a good one," she pointed out bluntly, "I don't care if your emotions were influencing me; I chose to kiss you to distract you from the idiot out in the forest bleeding."

She was gorgeous and so refreshingly direct that I felt myself begin to relax. Her strength reminded me of Maria yet they had little else in common.

"If you get all sulky and try to take all the blame it is the same as declaring that my decisions are meaningless next to yours. Now get up and go hunting before I get really annoyed."

I smiled a little at her tirade and did as she ordered. Before I disappeared into the forest I glanced back at her. She held up a hand before I could offer an apology.

"Not a word. Go kill something."

The guilt didn't remanifest. While I hunted the largest buck I could find I began to smile at the ridiculous situation. I would have to let Emmett throw me through a tree as an apology for kissing his mate, or letting her kiss me.

Rosalie had also finished off a large deer, scattered the remains and taken a seat at the edge of the forest by the time I returned. She looked so peaceful that I could almost ignore the smell of fresh blood in the air.

Her beauty was obvious but I admired her confidence more with each passing day. She was brave enough to be herself without apology.

"You seem calmer," Rosalie observed, "Hunger makes anyone cranky. Now go back in there and throw around as much of that pent-up emotion as you can; make the rats horny, piss off the birds and leave the reindeer rolling on the grass with laughter."

"Can reindeer laugh?" I asked.

Rosalie just rolled her eyes at me, "Hurry up before I call Emmett and tell him that I kissed you."

I shrugged, "He's going to find out eventually."

She grinned evilly, "Fine, I'll tear down your hammock and desecrate your tree-house with Emmett if you're not in that forest in three seconds."

I made it in less than one.

The herd of reindeer were seriously confused but I was feeling much more relaxed. I nearly admitted that Rosalie was right until I saw the smug expression on her face. Clearly she already knew that she was right.

"I bow to your wisdom!" I joked, "Never should anyone doubt your word Goddess Rosalie."

She rolled her eyes at me, "I would have accepted a short 'you were right, next time I should shut up and cooperate'," she pointed out.

I stood to attention and offered her a stiff salute. The lopsided grin took the edge off the pose, "Yes ma'am."

Rosalie stretched her arms over her head, which was clearly unnecessary. She watched my hand fall away from my forehead as I tried not to admire her body.

"Well while you're in the mood to take orders; I have decided what we're going to tell the family about that kiss."

I gulped, "And what would that be?"

"The truth; you were doing a very good job of resisting fresh, flowing human blood until whoever it was moved toward us. I could see how much you were struggling so I distracted you."

"Okay, but what should I say if anyone asks how you distracted me?"

Rosalie shrugged, "Tell them the truth; Edward is going to find out anyway."

We headed toward the water without haste. I thoroughly enjoyed standing next to a Vampire and feeling no fear or trepidation that she would turn on me at any moment.

"What are you thinking about?" Rosalie asked curiously, "You have a weird look on your face."

How could I explain my train of thought without insulting her? Surely she would not appreciate being compared to Maria.

"Out with it," Rosalie said with a smile, "I'm not afraid of whatever is going on in that mind of yours."

Instead of entering the water we sat down so our bare feet were being lapped by the gentle movements of the water.

I remained silent even though I wanted to speak, I just couldn't.

"I get it," Rosalie assured me, with a platonic pat on my knee, "You're used to seeing and processing emotions; not describing them."

"Living with Jasper has taught you quite a lot," I replied softly.

"And living with Edward and Alice has taught me an incredibly amount of patience," she added, "There is a universal expression of worry which all males have and I recognised it on you pretty easily."

"Like a pathetic Bat signal?" I guessed.

She slipped an arm around my shoulders and leaned her head against me, "Something is on your mind and I am honestly curious."

I sighed, "Maria was a manipulative bitch but she could be kind when she wanted to. I survived on the crumbs of affection she gave to me and the hope that after the allotted time I would be free."

I relaxed into the concerned emotional cloud wafting around Rosalie.

"She was strong and determined; it was not hard to follow her instructions even if she stood back and made me lead the charge into battle," I continued, "You are as strong as Maria ever was, yet there is no cruelty within you. I find it strange that I admire you but I don't fear you."

Rosalie lifted her head to regard me with a smile and a hefty dose of pride, "You are a good man Jackson and I am glad you decided to stay with us."

The conversation from weeks earlier was easy to recall. I wondered why Rosalie didn't break away from Carlisle and head her own coven. She had the control to kill rapists without feeding from them yet she didn't.

Hesitantly, I broached the subject.

"I consider Carlisle to be my father," Rosalie began quietly, "And his approval means a lot to me. I am proud that I have been able to exist as a Vampire for over eight decades without tasting human blood. I worry that if I spilled blood, even by accident, I would slip."

There was more to it, I could tell. I waited patiently while she considered her words.

"Emmett has terrible control as a Newborn; I would not want to tempt him when he has worked so hard to refrain. Even when I killed the men who attacked me, I did not feel guilt except over the two security guards in my way. They did not deserve to die just because I wanted revenge."

"I still find it odd that you all look to Carlisle as your leader," I admitted, "I can see the sense in the first decades of the diet but after so long I don't see the point."

Rosalie patted me on the back reassuringly, "We need each other because we are so isolated from the rest of the world."

"I don't see why two covens couldn't live in close proximity," I said, "There are no fights for territory and it would be easier to explain when interacting with humans."

"I was eighteen when I died," Rosalie pointed out, "You would have to be perceived as the responsible adult no matter who led the coven."

"Even if I was playing the father like Carlisle does, I would follow you," I said, "And that is not a loyalty I would offer many in this world."

"I appreciate the sentiment," Rosalie acknowledged with a smile, "And I am sure the issue of our increased numbers will lead to a split eventually. I just hope that no-one has to suffer when it happens."

"I could pose as Carlisle's older brother," I mused.

"And Jasper and I could be younger siblings who you gained custody of when our parents died," Rosalie added, "Then we would have to explain the others."

"Emmett, Edward and Alice could be Esme's younger siblings," I continued, "Maybe we could say she and Carlisle met at a support group for young adults who had gained custody of their siblings."

"Well it sounds better than the current one," Rosalie admitted, "We just have to figure out where Bella fits in. If only she was blonde."

"A cousin on the Whitlock side?" I suggested.

Rosalie nudged me playfully, "Maybe she can play the relative of your mate."

Always I was drawn back to the mate I desperately wanted to find. I spent hours dreaming of what she would act like; look like and how she would react to my scars.

"Assuming I ever find her," I sighed, "Tanya has been waiting a thousand years; I would be insane by now."

"You underestimate yourself," Rosalie argued, "Tanya has lived in hope, and on her own terms. She learned long ago to make no apologies for herself and to ignore the judgement of others. It is a lesson which would help you to cope."

I suspected it was a lesson Rosalie had learned from Tanya too.

"Tanya pinned her hopes on Edward but now that she has accepted that he was destined for Bella she is regaining her former perspective," Rosalie said softly.

The idea of Tanya, or anyone really, wanting Edward as their mate baffled me. I could forgive the mind-reading as he could not help it but the pompous attitude grated.

"She would have strangled him within a year," I predicted, "He's offer his arrogant opinion one time too many and she would rip his head off."

Rosalie laughed loudly; it was a beautiful sound, "As much as I love Edward as a brother he plays the annoying younger sibling far too well."
"He sounds so confident but I can see how insecure he always is," I told her, "He was only a year younger than you when he was turned so why is he such a brat?"

Rosalie shrugged, "Girls mature faster than boys; I suspect Edward will never really grow up because he was too young when he was turned. He was an only child as a human and spent fifteen years as such as a Vampire. I also think our reliance on his ability to remain undetected has gone to his head."

"I want to like him as a person, but it's so damn hard," I admitted.

"Jasper hinted that Edward was never as confident as he sounded but I never realized how much he bluffs," Rosalie said thoughtfully.

"He is the classic teenage boy," I complained, "Acting so loud and full of himself to cover his fear of rejection. Carlisle must have the patience of a saint not to have ripped his head off at least once."

"Luckily Edward found his perfect match in Bella; the classic insecure teenage girl who doesn't realize that her life could be complete without a boyfriend."

"Please tell me that their daughter has reached a level of maturity that neither of her parents managed?"

Rosalie beamed, "Renesmee matured physically and mentally. Sometimes the way she looks or speaks to her parents makes it clear that she recognises their immaturity but she would never call them on it."

"And in a few weeks she'll be returning?" I tried to keep the trepidation out of my voice.

"Yes, along with the smelly in-laws. Thankfully they are as entertaining as they are odorous."