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Princess Britny has a new story morning sun.. she came up with it i just helped with some ideas.. Shes the genius behind it really I just help : -) Check it out!!
ALSO !!! SOMETHING TO CHECK OUT!! MY NEW STORY RISING SUN… it's about Renesmee… check it out… I think you'll really like it.. Its just the first 2 chapters so far.. I wanted to finish this before starting a new story head on full concentration kinda thing.. But I have a really good plot to it.. So just bare with me while you read the first few chapters to figure it all out : - ) lol.. Lemme kno if I should continue..
Epilogue
The memories of everything which happened in Italy were etched in my mind forever. I could never forget the fear in Bella's eyes or the horrors which I put her through. I knew that she also hadn't forgotten because she kept talking about it in her sleep. I had not only done it to Bella, but my entire family. I had put them through hell.
But eventually things finally settled down.
For the most part. My family kept a watchful eye on me. All but Alice. She knew there was nothing to worry about. At least yet. They would ask me on a daily basis how I was. What I was doing, how I was feeling, how was Bella. Over and over again. I knew they did it because they cared, but it was almost over bearing. I had finally reached my boiling point one day and I blew up on them. Telling them I was fine. Well more like screaming that I was fine. I could still hear there thoughts they still questioned whether I would up and leave and pull a suicidal mission again. I didn't understand it, I had Bella. There was nothing else I wanted more.
The people at the hospital were more than happy to hear Carlisle had decided to rejoin them. They had told him how glad they were that sunny LA didn't work out for them.
I was still distraught over the state I had left Bella in. I didn't know I was leaving her like that. Alice had tried to warn me but I wouldn't listen. If I could only turn back time and change what happened. I had only wanted to make things better for Bella. Allow her to experience every possible human experience. With me that wouldn't be possible.
I sighed. I still wanted her to experience as many of those human moments as possible, before, I still didn't like the idea of her becoming a vampire, but she was as stubborn as ever.
She was stronger than I had ever imagined, she had been through everything, lived through Volterra, and still wanted to be with me. Forever.
I couldn't believe that Bella was behind in calculus. She was never behind in anything. Alice and myself were obviously ready for god knows how many times to graduate. I decided that I would help her, and make her understand why good grades were important. That was something else that Bella got angry and irritated about every time it was brought up. College. She had her mind set on becoming a vampire after graduation. I shuddered at the thought of my beautiful warm blushing Bella, cold, and hard. Soulless.
Carlisle had actually agreed to do it. He had actually went against my wishes. She later told me that she would rather I be the one to do it, but I didn't want to be the one to take her life, to stop her beating heart, to damn her to eternity. I don't agree with Carlisle that our souls remain intact after we become vampires. That we have a place after this. There was no logic to it? How could a monster be granted a place in heaven? Maybe I had softened, I had started to believe deep down, or at least hope that he was right. How else would I have believed that when Bella came for me in Italy, I was debating whether or not I was in hell or not. But that still doesn't make me completely sure that our souls are not destroyed. I don't want to take any risks with Bella, and I cannot damn her soul. And on the other hand, it pained me to see how eager she was to be like me. Cold, hard, and heartless. It hurt to think of how, after changing her, I would never see her blush red again, never hear her heart thump erratically when she saw me or when I touched her, never feel her warm touch.
My mind was set on making sure she was accepted into a good college so everday I saw her during our time we were allowed. I cheerfully brought her stacks of college applications, she was annoyed. But Charlie was thankful for me insisting on good colleges for her. She was not allowed out of the house and I was only allowed in during specified times during the day. Charlie almost always avoided me. He had no clue that as soon as he was asleep I came back in through the window in Bella's room, and held his daughter into the night.
There was still another problem to deal with. Bella was still trying to talk to Jacob Black. As much as I despised that mongrel. I really didn't have much of a choice in the matter but to let her try. She called him only after I had left at nine. Much to my anger and to Charlie's pleasure. He was happy and hopeful to have Jacob back, hoping that he could sway Bella from me. Bella was sad, and she felt guilty that she couldn't keep both me and Jacob happy. She felt bad for not thinking of him more than she did. She could tell my face expressions every time she mentioned his name how I felt about it. I hated him. I tried to hide it, but I knew it didn't always work. My insides felt like they were on fire, and I would again feel guilty that I had left her in such danger. That while I was gone, she had to be comforted by that dog.
On Saturday when I had picked her up from work, she had lost her temper about the mutt.
"It's just plain rude! Downright insulting!" She angrily ranted on.
"Billy said he didn't want to talk to me," she huffed with anger looking out at the rain. I suppressed a smile. I was happy the dog was at least smart enough to stay away from her now that I was back.
"That he was there, and wouldn't walk three steps to get to the phone! Usually Billy says he's out or busy or sleeping or something. I mean, it's not like I didn't know he was lying to me, but at least it was a polite way to handle it. I guess Billy hates me now, too. It's not fair!" How could she think like that? Who could hate such a warm, caring person like her? She was under the impression that Jacob and now Billy hated her.
"It's not you, Bella" I said quietly, stating the obvious. I couldn't imagine anyone hating her, except perhaps Victoria. But no, then again, Victoria hated me. I was the one who killed James, not Bella. "Nobody hates you."
"Feels that way," she mumbled and wrapped her arms around herself. It was an action which until recently puzzled me. A few nights ago, she told me that she used to hug herself when she was in pain. Not physical pain, emotional pain. She didn't want to tell me, but I eventually persuaded her to tell me. She said that now that I am here with her again, she doesn't feel that way anymore. But that didn't erase the habit, she had explained to me. A feeling of sadness shot through me like a knife stabbing me as I saw this. The habit had formed because of me. And now it continued because the sadness she felt toward him.
"Jacob knows we're back, and I'm sure that he's ascertained that I'm with you," I said. How I wished I could say something which made her feel good. "He won't come anywhere near me. The enmity is rooted too deeply."
"That's stupid. He knows you're not, like other vampires" She was so naïve. Didn't she know that however hard we tried to be 'vegetarians', it could slip sometimes? Did she forget what had happened at her birthday party? It showed me how much she really loved me. She trusted me so blindly.
"There's still good reason to keep a safe distance away." I said unwillingly. I knew now the pain of being separated from Bella. She was the love of my existence. If my heart was beating, her name would be etched in every heartbeat. I would love her till the end of eternity. Anyhow, I glanced at her from the corner of my eye to see if she reacted to my words.
"Bella, we are what we are," I told her calmly. "I can control myself, but I doubt he can. He's very young. It would most likely turn into a fight, and I don't know if I could stop it before I k—" oh no. Wrong choice of words, I thought. I stopped and held my breath for a second and then continued immediately and quickly in a very slightly strained voice. "Before I hurt him. You would be unhappy. I don't want that to happen."
I don't think she heard the tension in my voice. Now I looked at her, turning my head. She had a shocked expression on her face. I quickly looked ahead, in case she decided to look at me. I cursed myself inwardly for slipping like that. I knew she would be hurt by my words, because she was appalled by the idea that I would kill her werewolf friend. I could only anticipate her reaction. I risked another glance in her direction and saw that her face was pale white. It would be only seconds before she responded.
"Edward Cullen," her voice had diminished to a whisper, pronouncing each word distinctly as though she couldn't comprehend what I had said. "Were you about to say 'killed him'? Were you?"
I looked ahead as soon as I said those words. I knew that they would not go unobserved. The signal turned from red to green. I wouldn't have noticed it so clearly otherwise, but I was concentrating on driving for what seemed like the first time. Even then, I drove very, very slowly. Glancing down, I saw that I was going only at 40miles per hour. I knew my words would hurt her, but what more did she expect? She knows that vampires and werewolves have been enemies for much too long. Does she want me to praise him to the stars or something? I tried to form some response, something to justify myself, at least. But nothing came to me. I structured my next sentence extremely carefully.
"I would try, very hard, not to do that." I finally said after much consideration. From the corner of my eye, I saw Bella gaping at me with her mouth hanging open.
Bella seemed to be debating something and shook her head to clear her confusion.
"Well," she took a deep breath and continued "Nothing like that is ever going to happen, so there's no reason to worry about it. And you know Charlie's staring at the clock right now. You'd better get me home before I get in more trouble for being late." She turned her head and half smiled. But my face became hard like stone. I stiffened as I heard Charlie's thoughts. 'Where is Bella? Where is she? OH she is going to be in so much trouble when she comes home. Is she aiming for a life sentence? it's a good thing Jake was responsible. He is the sensible one. I'm glad he could be trusted enough to tell me the truth about the bikes. She could have been killed! What was she thinking. God I am going to kill her myself. How dare she do this, was she crazy? First she jumps off a cliff, how insane was that. Then she runs away for three days! I have no idea where she was. For three whole days she was gone without a word, and she comes back with, uh him. Edward. And now this. She is in so much trouble. She is going to be grounded for the rest of her life. Its going to be back to an amish existence for her! No phone, no T.V, no truck. She'll be lucky if I let her shower!' his ranting continued like that.
I froze, Bella's heart thumped louder than usual as she recognized the shocked expression I held on my face.
"You're already in more trouble, Bella." My voice couldn't handle more than a whisper as I tried to digest what Charlie was thinking. I stared at Bella's house in horror. What the hell did that dog want from us? Bella clutched my arm and followed my gaze. At first, she couldn't see it.
"What? What is it?"
I hesitated and said "Charlie..."
"My dad?" she asked confused. I looked down at her, controlling my emotions and finally smoothed my face into a calm mask. She looked a little eased by my calmness.
"Charlie. is probably not going to kill you, but he's thinking about it" I said as I drove past the Swan residence. I stopped a little past the house and parked near the dense forest cover. Instantly I heard another person's thoughts. Jacob Black.
Fury and rage consumed in an instant and for that moment I really felt like killing him. What did Bella do to deserve this, I asked myself? True, she may have left him, to save me, but she felt obliged to do it, I didn't ask her to.
'how long is the stupid leech going to take? Dumb bloodsucker.' even the dogs thoughts were crude. I shook with anger.
Bella looked incredibly upset. Poor girl. She's already been through so much. How could Jacob Black do this to her? Does he want to kill her? Or Charlie? He's probably hyperventilating right now.
"What did I do?" she gasped.
I had best get this over with before Charlie gets even angrier. I glanced back at the house.
Finally, the object in the driveway caught her attention. A shiny red motorcycle was parked next to Charlie's cruiser. It was impossible to miss. I watched her as she put two and two together and figured out what had happened. I saw many emotions flit across her face. Hurt, sadness, betrayal, outrage, but mostly anger and fury. Suddenly Bella's heartbeat became a loud fury buzz.
"No!" she gasped. "Why? Why would Jacob do this to me?" I was speechless. Honestly, I didn't know what to say and I didn't think words would be enough. It took me a minute to realize that she was shaking. Her whole body trembled with a rage that I had rarely seen. "Is he still here?" Bella hissed through her clenched teeth. I nodded my head and looked towards the path leading into the forest.
"Yes, he's waiting for us there." Before I could say anything else, Bella had leaped up with her fists clenched up into balls. I chuckled. My, my, wouldn't it be entertaining to watch Bella punch him? I got out at ignoring my speed and caught her around the waist before she got onto the path. Bella's face was livid and her eyes were furious.
She looked angrier than I had ever seen her. She shouted at me.
"Let me go! I'm going to murder him! Traitor!" I didn't like her attitude. Why was she shouting? I tuned into Charlie's thoughts. Thank god, he didn't hear anything. I looked at Bella and said "Charlie will her you. And once he gets you inside, he'll brick over the doorway." She suddenly realized that and took a look back towards the house.
"Just give me one round with Jacob, and then I'll deal with Charlie." She tried to persuade me. I looked her in the eye and corrected her misconception. She tried to break free from my grasp.
"Jacob Black wants to see me. That's why he's still here" That did it. Bella stopped struggling and her hands became limp.
"Talk?" She asked warily.
"More or less." I replied coolly. Probably Jacob felt the same way about meeting as me, and if Bella wasn't there, the only thing that would've stopped me was the treaty.
"How much more?" Her voice shook with anxiety. She was angry with him, but she didn't want him hurt or dead. Again I had to admire Bella. She can never keep a grudge against anyone. That was one of the things I loved so much about her. I lovingly smoothed her hair as I assured her.
"Don't worry, he's not here to fight me. He's acting as, spokesperson for the pack." I wanted to fight him, murder him, if Bella didn't care about them so much I probably would have.
Bella was confused the only thing she could say was "Oh."
I could hear Charlie muttering to himself impatiently. I tightened my hold on Bella as I heard Jacob's thought. He was also getting impatient. I pulled Bella towards the woods.
"We should hurry. Charlie's getting impatient." I took her hand and started up the path. Jacob Black was waiting there, not very deep into the forest, leaning against a tree, his face showing signs of anger and impatience. He looked at Bella before turning his eyes on me.
I tried to block his thoughts from my mind. There was nothing good in there. It didn't work, he was almost shouting. He thought that I was arrogant. He only came because Sam sent him, to remind me of the treaty. He was hoping we would bite someone, how little he really knew.
I had to raise my head to look at his face. Of course, he was now taller. That was one thing I wasn't very fond of about werewolves, the fact that they were taller. It's not like it gave them an unfair advantage or something, but I hated that I had to look up to them. But no, there was no feeling of inferiority. I halted abruptly leaving a wide gap between us. I had to be under control.
I looked at Bella, her anger faded into sadness. I saw it in her eyes.
"Bella" Jacob acknowledged her, not tearing his gaze from me, as though waiting for me to unexpectedly attack him.
I had to keep a hold of my anger, if I attacked him the treaty would be broken, and I would not be the one to break it, not after so long. If they had enough tolerance then so would I. also I knew Bella would not like it if I attacked any of them. It would cause her to much pain, and I would no cause her anymore pain than I already had.
"Why?" she sounded like she would break into tears at any moment. I inwardly cursed him again. "How could you do this to me, Jacob?" Jacob's face softened, but remained cold and hard.
"It's for the best." He said indifferently.
"What is that supposed to mean? Do you want Charlie to strangle me? Or did you want him to have a heart attack, like Harry? No matter how mad you are at me, how could you do this to him?" Bella choked on the last word. Thank god that he finally reacted. For a minute, I almost thought that he was cold hearted. How ironic. He winced at her words. He wasn't ready to respond to that so I did it for him. Maybe he didn't want to admit to Bella that he had done wrong.
"He didn't want to hurt anyone, he just wanted to get you grounded so that you wouldn't be allowed to spend time with me." I explained in a low voice. Jacob glared at me with hatred.
Bella had an exasperated look on her face.
"Aw, Jake!" She looked frustrated. "I'm already grounded! Why do you think I haven't been down to La Push to kick your butt for avoiding my phone calls?" That stumped him. He took a quick look at me and looked confused. Well, it's about time. Stupid mongrel.
He looked very sorry. Time for me to irritate him again, I thought impishly.
"He thought I wouldn't let you, not Charlie," I explained to Bella. It worked. He looked angry.
"Stop that," he snapped at me. I didn't reply to that. I have to control myself, for Bella, at least.
He shuddered and grinded his teeth together. I could literally hear the efforts which he was taking to control himself as his hands clenched into fists.
"Bella wasn't exaggerating about your, abilities. So you must already know why I'm here." Whatever our differences may be, I needed to say one thing before he opens hostilities.
"Yes," I said quietly. "But, before you begin, I need to say something." I saw him looking at me, puzzled, waiting for me to start. He was clenching and unclenching his fists and shivering with the rage that had consumed him just seconds before. I didn't want to do this, but it was necessary I would always be grateful to him in some small way, no matter how small.
"Thank you," I said, surprised at how gratitude-filled, my voice sounded. I could hear the sincerity as I continued. "I will never be able to tell you how grateful I am. I will owe you for the rest of my, existence." Hah, I stunned him. He looked at me, perhaps more confused than before. I saw him exchange a glance at Bella, who, to my surprise also looked baffled. I decided to make myself more clear. "For keeping Bella alive when I … didn't." I made a note to myself never to leave Bella again. Why I did it in the first place, I could not understand at this moment.
"Edward." Bella started to speak, but I held up my hand to silence her, still looking at Jacob. A sudden comprehension spread across Jacob's face and he became stiff again.
"I didn't do it for your benefit." He told me coldly.
"I know. But that doesn't erase the gratitude I feel. I thought you should know. If there's ever anything in my power to do for you." It amazed me how these words were coming from the depths of my heart. Love did that. I was wrong to leave Bella. I loved her. And she loved me. And all these months apart showed me that true love doesn't just disappear. It remains on earth like a legend, an example for those who love. I
'leave now then leech. I love Bella, I can give her so much more. Leave now. Can you do that?' he was testing my patience.
I shook my head.
"That's not in my power." I stated plainly. He looked angry now.
"Whose, then?" he snarled at me.
I looked down and was lost in Bella's soft brown eyes. "Hers. I'm a quick learner, Jacob Black, and I don't make the same mistake twice. I'm here till she orders me away." Bella stared into my eyes for an instant and she understood what she didn't hear. I saw the realization in her face.
"Never," she whispered not looking away from me. I heard Jacob make a gagging sound. I turned my head and glared at him. Before I could say anything, Bella spoke.
"Was there something else you needed, Jacob? You wanted me in trouble, mission accomplished. Charlie might just send me to military school. But that won't keep me away from Edward. There's nothing that can do that. What more do you want?" Bella said acidly. Jacob kept his eyes on me. I smiled at Bella's cool words.
"I needed to remind your bloodsucking friends of a few key points in the treaty they agreed to. The treaty that is the only thing stopping me from ripping his throat out right this minute." He said finally. I got a little annoyed when I saw that he was controlling himself with so much effort. But he was merely a young werewolf. It would take more time for him to perfect his self control.
"We haven't forgotten," I stated blandly. At the same time, Bella asked, "What key points?" Jacob frowned at me while answering Bella's question.
"The treaty is quite specific. If any of them bite a human, the truce is over. Bite, not kill," He looked at Bella harshly. Though I was the one who could read minds, with Bella being the one exception, it seemed like he knew that Bella had made up her mind about becoming a vampire, a decision which even now, I had difficulty agreeing to and accepting. Did she tell him?
He has emphasized on the word 'bite'. I had known that I would break the treaty. That's why we would have to leave. Bella's face turned paler, she must have put two and two together.
Then, to my surprise, she replied in a voice just as cold as his, "That's none of your business." She snapped at him.
Her words hit their target. Jacob hadn't known that he was right, even though he was just passing on a message.
"The hell it –" He spluttered, not able to finish his sentence.
'She's going to become one of them! My best friend and the only person who I've ever truly loved is going to become my worst enemy. Just thinking about it makes me want to rip out his throat. I know that he's the one who persuaded Bella to do this. No, NO! I can't let this happen. He will not do this not to my Bella. Never allow it' he was shouting in his head. His mind was buzzing with fury/
My stance immediately became alert, in case I had to grab Bella and run.
He hadn't known that Bella intended to become a vampire. That she had numbered her heartbeats. He was going to lose control.
Jacob's face turned a sickly green and he looked like he was using all his strength to control himself. Bella hesitated and took a half-step toward him.
"Jake? You okay?"
I caught Bella by her waist and pushed her behind me. There was no way she was getting near that werewolf when he looked like he was on the verge of phasing.
If I had it my way she wouldn't be near the wolf again.
"Careful, he's not under control." I warned Bella. I could never let anything hurt my Bella. She doesn't realize how dangerous werewolves are, especially the young ones. Jacob was starting to regain control and now only his arms were shivering. He gave me menacing look of pure hatred and growled at me,
"Ugh. I would never hurt her." His implications didn't go unnoticed, neither by myself, nor Bella. She glared at him. I hissed under my breath.
I heard him try to keep himself under control, thinking of Bella, and how close she was. He didn't worry about me, he would have liked to rip me apart the only thing keeping him from doing so was the same thing that kept me, the treaty and Bella.
"BELLA!" Charlie's furious voice echoed throughout the woods. I could just imagine how much trouble Bella would be in. "YOU GET IN THIS HOUSE THIS INSTANT!" All three of us stood completely still, in silence.
"Crap." Muttered Bella, her voice shook.
Jacob looked apologetic. He looked more calm. Stupid mongrel this was his fault. "I am sorry about that," he mumbled. "I had to do what I could, I had to try."
"Thanks." Bella's sarcasm was ruined by the shaking of her voice. She was still upset. Well, she had every right to be. She looked down the path, as though expecting something.
"Just one more thing," I added to Bella. I turned to Jacob, directing my next question at him. "We've found no trace of Victoria on our side of the line, have you?"
"The last time was while Bella was, away. We let her think she was slipping through, we were tightening the circle, getting ready to ambush her" Bella shivered. "But then she took off like a bat out of hell. Near as we can tell, she caught your little female's scent and bailed. She hasn't come near our lands since." I nodded my head in understanding.
"When she comes back, she's not your problem anymore. We'll " He rudely interrupted me. I narrowed my eyes.
"She killed on our turf. She's ours!" Jacob snarled at me through clenched teeth.
"No," Bella opposed both of us. I knew she was frightened. But Victoria would die.
"BELLA! I SEE HIS CAR AND I KNOW YOU'RE OUT THERE! IF YOU AREN'T INSIDE THIS HOUSE IN ONE MINUTE!" Charlie shouted again. He didn't finish his sentence, but I had a pretty good idea of what to expect when we got back to Bella's house.
"Let's go," I urged her. Why wasn't she coming? Bella looked back at Jacob, a pained expression on her face.
"Sorry. Bye, Bells." Jacob whispered. Bella looked like she could barely hear him. But I heard him perfectly.
"You promised," she pleaded. "Still friends, right?" Her eyes held a strange desperation. Jacob shook his head. Bella looked hurt.
"You know how hard I've tried to keep that promise, but, I can't see how to keep trying. Not now." His face was a mask of indecision.
Jacob's face became sad. "Miss you." He reached out his hand towards Bella, trying to close the space that separated them.
"Me, too," Bella struggled to speak. She stretched out her hand too, but it wasn't enough. They couldn't bridge the distance. Now it was time for me to intervene, as she tried to take a step forward, towards him.
I can't allow this. We have to go. Charlie is waiting. But I knew I was just using this excuse to cover up the real reason why I wanted to leave. I had to get Bella away from him.
"Jake." my arms became stiff, and I held her in an iron grasp.
"It's ok." She assured me, looking into my eyes. No, I couldn't let her see my weakness. And it wasn't ok; she couldn't just go to him like that, werewolf, or not. I wiped my face of all expression before my emotions betrayed me. I made my eyes indifferent and looked coldly at her.
"No. It's not." I disagreed harshly. There would be no compromises.
"Let her go," Jacob's anger flared again, just like mine. "She wants to!" He took two large steps forward. He started shaking again, much less than before, but nonetheless it was shaking. I yanked Bella behind me and spun to look at Jacob.
"No! Edward!" Bella protested.
"ISABELLA SWAN!"
Charlies angry thoughts were in an uproar. I had to get Bella out of there, for more than one reason.
"Come on! Charlie's mad!" Bella's voice had risen a couple of octaves and she looked anxious.
"Hurry!" She pulled me towards the path and I felt myself automatically relaxing. Anything to get away from Jacob. But I kept my eyes on him till we reached the end of the forest, still alert, still protecting Bella. Jacob was still scowling at us, until we left. His face suddenly fell and I saw the pain on every inch of his russet brown skin.
He argued with himself to come grab Bella from me. He decided against it.
My arm was securely around Bella's waist and I held her close. I was never going to let her go again. I looked at her. She had squeezed her eyes shut. She opened her eyes when we walked past the trees and saw Charlie's murderous expression. I felt her cringe and gently squeezed her in reassurance.
"I'm here." I promised. I would never leave her again. She took a deep breath, calming herself. I was comforted by that. I heard Charlie's thought shouting at me again. He was not going to be happy.
I held Bella's warm, soft hand in mine as we walked towards her house.
It was like walking into the lions den. none the less we were together, that was all that mattered.
Everything that had happen was in the past. I looked to the future. The past meant nothing, as long as Bella was by my side, safe and happy the rest was miniscule.
Ida Scott Taylor once wrote, do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone. And do not be troubled about the future for it has yet to come. Live in the present and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering.
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