A/N: Okay, don't have a lot of time peoples! I'm literally watching the clock as I'm putting this update up otherwise I'll have to walk home in the rain!
Thanks to: Waterbomb22, Alexa Hiwatari, izzy1229anime, Zetsu's Rose, and FMJ26.
And people should already know the disclaimer by now, so fuck it.
Warning for singing! up ahead. Let's read.
"Don't forget your lunch!" Inside the home/boutique of Sasori and Deidara, the red-haired scorpion-demon was handing his son Saso a delicately designed lunch-box just as the blonde child was about to walk out the door.
"Thank you." Saso nodded, taking the box before looking at the mirror by the door. He gave a focused stare at his reflection before snapping his fingers, the tints on his hair turning from blue to green and his eyes shifting from aquamarine to blue. "Much better." He commented, now matching his and his doll's outfits of the day to a T.
"Have a good day!" Sasori called as Saso walked out of the door and met up with Mizuki and Hun, the three small demons walking to classes together. "Now then…" You see, even though he had work and a few orders to fill, the boutique would be much calmer this week since Deidara had gone to Stylist's-Retreat in the grand city of Bloomingdale. So, Sasori walked around, wondering what he could do to keep himself busy.
He walked into his workshop, fabric and outfits all over with patterns and design sketches hanging on the walls. He smiled as he passed a mannequin dressed in an outstanding, flowing golden ball-gown with delicate chains of gold curving down the bottom; a shining head-band completing the outfit. Sasori had decided to get started on his and Deidara's outfits for the Shooting Star Ball as soon as they had gotten tickets (thanks to Itachi of course), and he had finished his beautiful songbird's dress first.
Yet, now that he wasn't too busy, his copper eyes blinked as they landed on a design he had been working on for some time for an outfit of his own. When he took it down from the wall and examined it, there was a small clicking and a hissing from his work table. He looked down and saw a scorpion, its tiny body a shining pale shade. "Oh Opal," Sasori spoke, addressing his pet scorpion, "Can't you just imagine it? Me and Deidara stepping out in glorious new clothes at the Shooting Star Ball in Konoha!"
Opal wasn't interested that much. She walked onto a length of wine-shaded fabric before settling down for a nap. But Sasori pulled the material from under her, Opal hissing as she had to find a new place to sleep. "Oh yes, I did design it myself! Thanks so much for asking!" Sasori smiled at himself in the mirror, seeing how the fabric went with his skin.
Opal settled down on another pile of fabric, just to have it start moving as Sasori ran it through a sewing machine. She hissed and walked away, Sasori stating, "Of course you can help me, Opal! Thank you." He sat her on a nearby shelf before sitting pin-cushion on top of her. The scorpion hissed, Sasori speaking, "You want to help me more? Oh, you're such a dear!"
Before she knew it, Opal was stuck holding measuring tape, scissors, and thread as Sasori used his magic and chakra to shape his chosen fabric to the body of his mannequin. "Now, now, don't move!" He smiled as he worked, "This won't take long at all!" Opal could only let out a pitiful hiss in response.
Later on that day, the doors of the boutique were almost knocked off their hinges as Hidan knocked on it, shouting, "Sasori! Open the damn door!"
"You have hands don't you?" Kakuzu frowned as he opened the door into the house, Itachi and Hidan following him inside. "Where is Sasori anyway?" Itachi readjusted the bag on his arm before he shushed the other two demons, pointing over to where Sasori was busy working on his outfit,
"He's concentrating…" The redhead had even taken out his pair of magnification-glasses so he wouldn't make a mistake anywhere.
"What do you think he's making?" Hidan asked as they crowded behind him. Itachi answered,
"Looks like a suit."
"That would make sense," Kakuzu muttered, "Seeing that this is a boutique." They whispered and muttered until Sasori whipped his head around, his left eye twitching as he asked,
"May I help you?"
"Oh, yes. Sorry to bother you Sasori, but I need a quick favor." Itachi began, rummaging around his bag until he found a well-worn silk cloak with a few missing buttons. He sat it on the empty workspace near Sasori and asked, "Could you add a few buttons to this? It's part of my outfit for the Shooting Star Ball."
Sasori's eyes went wide as he shook his head, "No. No, no, no! You can't wear this…" He gave a pained glance to the cloak, "Thing to the Shooting Star Ball! You, my dear, need an excellent new outfit! A glamorous new gown that I will make for you. I insist!" Itachi smiled at the offer but refused,
"That's very nice of you to offer, but I couldn't. It would be far too much work to put on you. This cloak is fine." Sasori frowned at the weasel before taking the cloak and tossing it behind him, his tail ripping it apart before he deadpanned,
"Now it's not."
"Well…" Itachi hummed, "Alright then. Thank you so much Sasori, knowing your work I'm sure that it will be amazing." Sasori smiled at his victory over Itachi and his ugly old cloak before he turned to Kakuzu and Hidan.
"What?" Kakuzu rose an eyebrow, "If you have something to say, then say it already."
"Let me guess," Sasori frowned, "You two don't want new clothes for the Ball either?" Hidan gave a shrug of his shoulders,
"Why? We were just going to wear our regular clothes anyway."
"What?" Sasori gasped in horror, "No, damn it! You absolutely must wear formal attire!" Kakuzu tapped his chin for a moment before he huffed,
"Nah."
"Okay…" Sasori rolled his eyes, "How about I just tailor your… clothes a bit?"
"Kuzu, just let him." Hidan nudged his husband in the shoulder, "Otherwise he won't let us get out of here!" The stitch-demon sighed,
"Fine, just don't go over-board." Sasori smiled back,
"I promise." Just then, there was a yell of,
"LOOK OUT!", before Kisame, Ivan, and Alfred crashed with a splash of water through the door and into a pile of fabric and mannequins. The shark-demon, the Baba Yaga, and the Trickster Spirit all groaned before Kisame gave a nervous chuckle,
"Sorry. The new work-out… Didn't quite work out." Sasori wasn't angry though, he only looked at the three males before you could literally see the light of an idea pop into his head,
"Inspiration!" He laughed before looking around and announcing, "I'll make a new Ball outfit for you too Kisame!" Ivan brushed himself down before asking,
"Are you speaking of the Shooting Star Ball?"
"Yes, why?"
"Could you please to be making outfits for me and my wife here as well?" Ivan asked, completely ignoring Alfred's rants of 'I'm a man, damn it!'. Sasori blinked in disbelief before asking,
"You have tickets? Wait, how did you get tickets?"
"Sasori!" Kisame frowned, "How dare you challenge the power of the bromance!"
"Fine…" The redhead sighed before his smile came back up full-force, "I'll make outfits for all of you, oh and Zetsu, Tobi, Sasuke, Naruto too!" He thought for a moment before he smiled, "And then I can host a fashion show starring all of you!"
"That sounds like it could be fun! Whatever a fashion-show is…" Alfred smiled, Itachi asking,
"Do you think you'd be up to it?" But Sasori had already walked over to his fabric closet and was pulling out rolls after rolls of different colored and textured fabrics,
"Oh, it will be a bit of work, but it would be a huge boost for business. And, furthermore, I could have a bit of fun since Deidara won't be back until the end of the week!" After a round of agreements filled the room, Sasori decided to get straight to work. But Kakuzu walked over and asked with a raised eyebrow,
"So all you have to do is make a different, stunning, original, amazing outfit for one, two, three…" He counted off in his mind before continuing, "Counting yourself, twelve demons? In no time at all?" Sasori chuckled, cutting some shapes out of the white fabric,
"Oh Kakuzu… You make it seem like it's going to be hard!"
Those in Adamant Falls knew that when Sasori was 'in the zone', your best bet would be to leave him alone and get five miles away from his house. The windows of the house/boutique had been closed and inside, the redhead was hard at work…
Shiny black dress shoes tapped against the ground in a specific beat before a cane joined them. A black and copper top hat was lifted up, revealing Sasori's face; the redhead dressed in black and copper suit and waving the cane, two sewing machines turning on, before he sang, a flourish of trumpets, saxophones, and drums creating a jazzy atmosphere,
"Thread by thread,
Stitching it together…
Itachi's dress,
Cutting out the patterns snip by snip!" He snapped his fingers, a pair of scissors cutting out a dress pattern out of scarlet silk,
"Making sure the fabric fits just nicely!
Oh and such a color,
It's so hip!
Always have to keep in mind my pacing!" The fabric floated down to a mannequin, Sasori inspecting it as he added,
"Making sure the clothes correctly facing,
I'm stitching up…
Itachi's dress..!" He looked at his work before the instruments played him off to his next bit of work.
Opal had been resting on layers of ruby-shaded fabrics and gold and green material when it was snatched under here, rolling her about as Sasori sang,
"Yard by yard,
Fussing with the details…" Sasori quickly cut all the fabric into the patterns of two kimonos and set them up, looking at the ruby fabric,
"Jeweled hairpins,
And don't you know that stitches work just fine?" Opal had found a ruby hair-pin to play with but Sasori took it away and set it besides the ruby-embossed kimono, before adding a simple yet stunning stitch-pattern to the sleeves of the green and gold kimono,
"Make them something perfect to inspire
Even though they hate formal attire!
Must mind those all those tiny details,
Even though they're more concerned with sales!
These are Kakuzu and Hidan's new clothes..!"
The music surged up before Sasori jumped over to his drawing board and quickly sketched a poofy, Gothic Lolita-style dress with a matching hat,
"Dress-making's easy:
For dearest Tobi something in pumpkin!" He shaded the dress with an orange color pencil and made the hat cuter and pumpkin-shaped, adding a candy-shaped temporary tattoo to the image's cheek. Then he sketched a stylish hooded forest-green cloak: it had large sleeves and Sasori noted that the material had to be substantial yet light,
"Zetsu something breezy!
Blend color and form to —
You think this looks cheesy?" He asked Opal, biting his lip as he expected the scorpion to reply.
Sasori danced to the music filling his house, supervising all the work he was doing until he frowned. Now came the challenging group: Kisame, Ivan, Alfred, Sasuke, and Naruto. He looked into his cabinet before smiling and pulling out a roll of fabric that matched the shade of the ocean perfectly,
"Something strong!
Maybe a bit fetching?" He set another sewing machine to work before cutting out a cloak of the whitest, softest silk; the material almost looking like snow,
"Silk of the skies,
Oh couldn't you just die?" Next came an outfit made of light, sandy material; a matching cloak that was designed to look like the majestic wings of an eagle being clipped around a mannequin's neck,
"Making sure this fits his neck the best!
Don't forget the magic in the dress!" He rushed over and started a kimono, fiery fabric being formed with a shining image of Kyuubi No Kitsune coming from the waist down,
"Though this rides high on his thighs," Then there was a robe made of midnight-blue material that looked suited for royalty; flaming sapphire gems being sewn into the sleeves as the scorpion-demon sang,
"He'll look just dashing;
Lucky guy!
By all I am,
They will learn how to dress!"
Sasori smiled, singing as he passed all the outfits that were being made under his supervision,
"Piece by piece!
Snip by snip!" Itachi's dress was given some black lace sleeves before a pair of simple but sexy black lace-up sandals was added,
"Laces up!
Shoulders fit!
Thread by thread!" An iron ran over Kakuzu's kimono, the ruffles on Tobi's dress being fluffed up for extra measure,
"Primped and pressed!
Yard by yard!
Never stressed!"
Sasori, more than pleased with his work slid to the center of it all and belted out,
"And that's the art of the dress~!"
"Ow!"
"Hey, watch it!"
"Fuck, that was my foot!"
All these and more could be heard as Sasori made all his friends/clients walk into his workshop; the space being darkened for a more suspenseful effect. "That's it, keep your eyes closed until I say…"
"Why? We cannot see anyway." Ivan stated, Sasori frowning a bit before he smiled, brushing a hand through his messy hair,
"Is everyone ready to be amazed?" They nodded, Zetsu having to hold Tobi from bouncing up and down. "Okay! Behold!" The lights were switched on…
And everyone gasped, looks of shock on their faces. And not the good kind.
Rows and rows of beautiful, gorgeous clothing all rested on mannequins. Sasori beamed, "These are your new outfits!" He walked over between the noble-looking green and gold, stitched kimono and the ruby-themed kimono he had made before he asked, "What do you think of your clothes now Kakuzu? Hidan? Pretty amazing I bet!" Opal had clicked her way over to the slender, blood-scarlet gown with ebony sleeves, settling between the sexy sandals before Sasori smiled,
"I had this dress in mind the moment I met you Itachi! Simple yet sexy with elegance all around. Just so you all know, I designed each and every dress with every demon's talents and personality in mind!" Sasori walked over to a sleeveless, ocean-blue trench coat with matching boots and sapphire choker,
"Kisame, it took me quite a while to get the color just right! But you love it, right?"
Next was a snow-white silk cloak and ensemble that would seem fit on a dignitary from a frozen kingdom, "Ivan, you just scream winter to me, so I went with my heart and composed this number here!"
Then there was the pant-suit with the cloak that looked like a giant, graceful eagle had taken rest on the back of it. "Alfred, as a free spirit, I wanted your outfit to soar through the skies!"
Next up, a hooded cloak of viridians and forest greens; matching gloves held hints of leave-designs and feathers, "I just know you're going to love yours Zetsu! It just screams spring!"
Sasori moved over to the fiery-shaded kimono that he had decided to make single sleeved, one arm being stylishly bare. "Your fiery spirit will be well-shown off with this number, hm Naruto-kun?"
Opal crawled onto the royal, midnight blue robes with matching crown-band and simple boots, "Sasuke, you're going to have to beat the girls off with a stick when you walk in with this baby!"
Finally, the pumpkin-shaded, frilly, bright, happy Gothic Lolita-style dress with matching pumpkin hat and shiny buckled-shoes, "And Tobi, look! Pumpkins, your favorite!"
The redhead had to take a breather, his presentation and his obvious tiredness showing for a bit before he straightened himself out and asked, "Aren't they all terrific?"
The other demons were silent, eyes wide as they looked at the outfits.
Sasori widened his smile, left eye twitching.
The others were still quiet before Itachi gulped and began, "Wow… They're…"
"Yeah, they're really…" Kisame trailed off, clearing his throat.
"They sure are…" Hidan gave a nervous smile, "Something."
"Yes!" Itachi snapped his fingers, "Something!"
"Tobi loves something!" Tobi cheered, "Its Tobi's favorite!" Ivan coughed,
"Great work." But then Zetsu sighed,
"They're… nice." Sasori was astonished, asking,
"Well, what's the matter? Don't you like them?" Naruto played with his fingers a bit, offering,
"They're very nice…" Sasuke looking away before he spoke,
"And we're grateful that you worked so hard on them.", almost automatically. But Alfred immediately piped up,
"Mine's just not as cool as I was imagining!"
"Dorogoy!" Ivan hit the blonde on the shoulder, Alfred whining,
"I was raised to tell the truth, damn it!"
"What we're all saying," Kakuzu spoke up, still-frowning at his outfit, "Is that they're not what we had in mind." They all agreed. For a moment, Sasori had a look on his face that would make a dragon think twice. But all of a sudden, he combed his hair straight and flashed a smile, saying,
"More than alright! I can re-do them!" His left eye was twitching like crazy as he took all the clothes and put them in a closet; locking them up.
"Sasori, no…" Zetsu gently spoke, "You don't have to, they're fine." Sasori had found some chains and was coiling them about the closet, gritting out,
"But I want them to be better than fine! I want you to say that they're perfect!"
"You sure?" Hidan raised an eyebrow, "We don't want to impose." Sasori shook his head, pushing the closet away,
"It's no imposition… I insist!"
"Well," Itachi stated, "Thanks again Sasori." And with that, everyone left to go about their daily business. When they were walking out the door, Sasori was chuckling, waving them off. But when he was gone, he fell to the floor and asked himself,
"Akasuna Sasori, what have you gotten yourself into?"
The next morning found a frazzled, sweaty, pale Sasori working away sewing more fabric when the bell on the boutique door rang, signaling that someone had come in. It turned out to be Zetsu, the plant-demon asking, "You wanted to see me Sasori?"
"Zetsu, darling!" Sasori rushed up and took the green-haired demon's hand and pulling him into the changing room, "Your new new outfit is ready! I completely revised it and I know you're going to love it!"
Zetsu looked at his reflection in the mirror as he now wore a green suit with a golden leaf pin and a breezy jade jacket. He frowned at the sight but he stated, "I… love it." Sasori wasn't amused,
"You're just saying that."
"Oh no, I do." Zetsu insisted, "It's… nice."
"Nice?" Sasori asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Nice."
"If you don't like it, you should just tell me!" Sasori huffed, Zetsu waving his hands in defense,
"But I do like it."
"Wait a minute," Sasori narrowed his tired, copper eyes; bags beginning to form underneath them, "'Like' it or 'love' it?" Zetsu started to back up as the redhead stalked towards him, replying,
"Both?"
"Which is it?" Sasori gritted out as he kept walking towards his friend, the other demon gulping in anxiety,
"Please stop coming towards me like that…"
"Then just tell me what you really think!"
"No, that's okay…" Before long, Zetsu was trapped between Sasori and the wall, the scorpion-demon badgering him on,
"Tell me…"
"I like it…" Zetsu actually began to shiver, Sasori hissing,
"Tell me, tell me, tell me!"
"Alright!" Zetsu stood up, "Since you really want to know…" Sasori watched as Zetsu took a notepad and pencil from his pocket. He wrote down a few things before taking a deep breath and beginning, "The arm-size is too loose, the under-shirt color doesn't go with the coat, the lapels are clearly machine-stitched, the pant legs are uneven, this fabric looks like wool when cotton would have done just fine, you used a back-stich on the suit when it clearly called for a front-stitch or even a blanket-stitch, the overall design seems better suited for a department store rather than the chicest couture."
Sasori just stood there, his face in a slack-jawed expression and his eyes wide even when Zetsu sighed, "But, you know… Whatever you want to do is fine."
The trumpets, drums, and saxophones had been started up again as Sasori sewed some badly decorated fabric with chakra-designs. Itachi was pacing in front of the scorpion-demon's workspace as he explained, "Now the lines of chakra and magic on my cloak must be technically accurate: fire chakra is more rigid than fire magic, not the other way around…"
"Stitch by stitch!
Stitching it together!
Deadlines loom!" He put the new fabric on a mannequin and winced as he saw the non-fitting shape, and from also the burning in his chest. He sighed and sang to himself,
"Don't you know the client's always right?
Even though my fabric choice was perfect!" He rushed to where Tobi was playing around with a roll of glow-in-the-dark fabric,
"Have to get them all done by tonight!
Tobi that color's too damn obtrusive,
Wait until you see it in the light!" The redhead opened the window, allowing some light to shine and change the fabric's color; Tobi simply rolling it around himself and Sasori groaning,
"I guess that I…
Have to sew them together..!"
Tobi looked to Sasori and smiled, "Don't you think that Tobi's outfit would look neat with some rainbows?"
"Well, I—"
"Lollipops?"
"You see—"
"Balloons?"
"Well –"
"Do it!" Tobi beamed.
"Hour by hour!
One more change!" Sasori sang as he tried to figure out how to blend orange and glow-in-the-dark green together,
"I'm sewing them together!
Bearing the great pains!" He hissed as his chest began hurting again.
He was measuring Zetsu's legs, his arms getting tangled in the measuring-tape, "Zetsu you're putting me in a bind!"
The redhead rushed into the lobby where Kisame was sitting; the shark yawning as he rushed by and asked, "Kisame, what is on your mind?
Dear gods, there's simply not much time!"
"Don't forget Kakuzu's boots must shine..!" He sighed as he shined the stitch-demons work-shoes. Afterwards, he showed the brunette the clothing plans he had,
"Tailoring is easy!
Every customer's call," When Kakuzu frowned and shook his head, Sasori sighed, ripping the designs apart,
"Brings a whole new revision
Have to pick up the pace,
But stay to my vision!"
"Eagle wings have only so many feathers," Alfred explained as he dropped off a basket full of feathers so Sasori could make him a type of headdress, "But I'm sure you'll figure it out!"
Zetsu smiled as he unrolled an aged design of an ancient, long-since-forgotten-in-the-fashion-industry, Victorian-style suit and hat, "French Haute-Couture. Do you think you can handle this?" Sasori groaned but got some more fabric out anyway.
Sasori stood in front of Kakuzu and Hidan sitting on the couch, the cat-demon asking, "What if it rains?" Kakuzu hummed in thought before he snapped his fingers, announcing,
"Galoshes!"
"Galoshes…" Sasori's left eye spasmed.
"Your work is fine…" Sasuke spoke to the scorpion-demon, "But I was thinking more of a…" The dragon pulled out a music magazine, the front page having his favorite band, all dressed in "Leather and spikes kind of feel."
'Little bastard…' Sasori hissed mentally, 'Doesn't he know how hard leather is to work with?'
Naruto looked through Sasori's design books before he gasped in delight as he found what looked like an orange cloak with long fox-ears and nine tails, "How about this?"
"But that's from my Halloween costume guide!" Sasori cried out in shock.
"Could you perhaps go in a more simple direction, my friend?" Ivan asked as Sasori removed pieces, one by one from a mannequin. "More." Another piece went. "More." Sasori gritted his teeth as he removed something else. "More." Just as Sasori followed the directions, Ivan shouted, "Too much!"
'Are you shitting me with this?' Sasori whined to himself.
"More balloons!" Tobi cheered, Sasori frowning as he tied some balloons to the mannequin's outfit in front of Tobi. The joy-demon shook his head, "Less balloons." Sasori took them away before Tobi called out, "More candy!" The scorpion-demon was about to sprinkle some candies onto the outfit before Tobi sighed, "Less candy. Oh, Tobi knows: streamers!"
"Streamers?" Sasori asked, an incredulous look on his face. But Tobi pouted,
"Whose dress is this?"
"Streamers it is!" Sasori gave a tortured smile as the pain in his chest grew.
Then came the biggest hurdle of all. Kisame was sitting on the work-desk, looking bored as Sasori fussed with a potential outfit. The red-haired demon sewed and snipped, constantly looking back to Kisame for input. But after thirty minutes, he finally huffed, "Aren't you going to say to change something too?"
"No," Kisame replied, "I just want my outfit to look manlier." Sasori was a bit confused,
"Do you not like the color?"
"The color's fine, just make it look manlier." Kisame sighed, Sasori asking,
"Do you like the shape?"
"The shape's fine!" Kisame insisted, "Just make the whole thing manlier!" He thought for a second, looking at the outfit, before he stated, "The whole thing needs to be about 20% manlier." Sasori groaned, hitting his head against the mannequin's chest.
"All we ever want is indecision!" Tobi sang, Kisame belting out,
"All we really like is what we know!"
"You must balance style with adherence!" Itachi smiled as Sasori crawled his way over to his sewing machine, Zetsu singing,
"Making sure we have a good appearance!"
"Even if you simply have to fudge it!" Hidan laughed, all of the demons crowding around Sasori as they chimed,
"Make sure they stay within our budgets!" Sasori sighed, starting the sewing machine up again,
"I must over-come intimidation;
Remember it's all in the presentation~!"
As Sasori raced around putting the final touches on everything, the trumpets were blasting out their finale,
"Piece by piece!
Snip by snip!" He changed Itachi's dress-shoes,
"Laces up!
Shoulders fit!
Thread by thread!" As he ironed Naruto's outfit down, he was sweating and panting,
"Primped and pressed!
Yard by yard!
Ever stressed!
And that's the art of the dress~!" The music ended just as Sasori collapsed in a pile of buttons, clips, and fabrics.
A/N: Who could count the number of memes in this chapter alone, huh?