Gespav: Thank you, but it's not that amazing.

Scarletbanner: I thought you would like the flame-thrower. Get ready for some of those delightful internal monologues. (PS. I am going to review 'Which to Bury Us or the Hatchet?' tomorrow – just so you know.)

IcausLSU: Thank you and it's okay, things will get better. Eventually.

Renaissancebooklover108: It's okay, Merlin's not left out in this chapter.

Grayember13: Thank you. Eeeeepp, to you too :)

LupineLover: Thank you!

X

It feels strange to wake up where she actually lives and with Merlin again. For the past two nights she had slept in an empty bed - Aithusa had disappeared again - and then on practically a stranger's sofa. She'd even woken up in a hospital not so long ago. She decides, in her mind, that this is the best way to wake up – with someone she actually likes and in a comfortable position. She turns in Merlin's arms to face him, expecting him to still be wearing that small, endearing frown he wore when he was deep in sleep. To her surprise, he is already awake and staring past her at the wall.

He doesn't seem to notice her movements until she prods him in the stomach with her finger. He blinks a few times and meets her eyes but doesn't say anything. His own eyes, that were usually bright blue and full of mischief, are slightly bloodshot and somewhat dull. She wonders if he has actually been to sleep at all.

"Merlin," Morgana says his name tentatively, in fear that she might startle him. He focuses on her face and flashes a brief, half-hearted smile. "How long have you been awake?"

"Since five," he says quietly, placing a heated palm on her shoulder and stroking down to her elbow and then back up again.

"What time is it now?" She asks another question, trying to keep the conversation going.

"Half eight."

"Oh. Couldn't sleep?"

"No. Been thinking," he stops the hand movements, instead letting his fingers rest on her side, the pad of his thumb rubbing small circles onto her pyjama covered ribs. He frowns when his thumb traces along one of the curved bones. "Are you getting thinner?"

She blatantly ignores his question, taking it offensively. "What were you thinking about?"

"You and Alvarr. I keep picturing these little scenarios in my head about what could've happened. There are all of these possibilities about what he might have have done to you and all of them disgust me. But in every single scenario, whatever horrible thing he's trying to do to you, I'm never there to help. If I hadn't been away on that stupid course then I could've helped," he finishes in a distressed tone, blinking back tears.

Morgana looks across at him in surprise; she hadn't known that this was affecting him in such a way. If she'd just told him earlier without any hesitation or fear of his response, it wouldn't be like this now. When she was younger, she had been more than happy to share her opinions on matters that had the smallest of importance to her, especially if it annoyed Uther. Most of the time, Uther couldn't scold her because all she had to do was mention her father's name and he'd be off her back in no time at all.

The remainder of her childhood had been spent thinking up new and innovative ways of irritating Uther while getting into as little trouble as possible. In some cases, Arthur had been of great help to her, such as the perfume in the post plan, not that she liked him reminding her of that nowadays. He tended to gloat about it when the subject was brought up.

Now, it was almost as if things were completely the opposite. She didn't tell anyone what she thought and was terrified of what the people close to her thought of her. When had she turned into such a coward?

" If it puts your mind at ease, then I'll tell you," she says confidently, willing back the 'New Morgana' she had designed only a few days ago and stepping into her expertly.

"But I don't want you to feel under pressure to tell me. I don't want it to be like that. You can tell me if you want to. I'm not going to force you into it, I'm not going to force you into anything you don't want to do, but I would like- I'm rambling, aren't I?"

Yes and it's adorable, Morgana thinks to herself, deeming the comment inappropriate right now.

"You are, but it's understandable. I would be the same if it was the other way around," Morgana answers, reassuring him without even meaning to.

Merlin looks a bit taken aback by her words. "Really? I just didn't think you cared about me... that much." he finishes quickly and swallowing nervously. He didn't want to offend her twice. The suggestion about her weight hadn't gone down that well.

"Well, obviously I do," she retorts, trying not to scowl at his comment. "Anyway, once you've finished insulting me, I'll tell you what happened."

"Hang on, wait-"

He stops talking when he sees her roll her eyes. Did he want to know or not?

"I kind of came to a conclusion about what Alvarr tried to do. Can I say it to you? Or is that too weird? I just thought, it might make it easier for you, that's all. It might be less uncomfortable if I say it," he continues calmly. He looks more at peace now. Maybe it was just the lack of sleep showing through.

"It's not weird. You can say what you think," Morgana agrees and he whispers some words into her ear. She nods slowly and watches his expression change to one of horror, his eyes now wide in fear. She feels a pang of guilt twinge in her chest at his state as he pulls her closer, so that there is no space between them. Everything she did or said seemed to hurt people. People she actually cared about.

"Was it really awful?" He asks in a worried voice that made her feel even worse. New Morgana, she tells herself, don't fail me now.

"No, it wasn't. He didn't hurt me or anything like that. It didn't feel like he was trying to... you know... but it was a bit unexpected," Morgana explains to him. It was the truth, wasn't it? Nothing horrible had happened.

"You told him to stop, right?" Merlin asks nervously. What if she hadn't? What if she wanted to be with Alvarr? What if she'd enjoyed it? It sounded ridiculous, maybe he was even a little paranoid about the whole thing, but the thoughts had crossed his mind.

"I did and-"

"How many times?"

"Oh. Twice, I think, and-"

"And he continued?" He cuts in with another question.

"Yes, Merlin, he did. But it-"

"Did you try and fight him?"

She was about to yell at him for interrupting her again, something both the New and Old Morgana hated, but his question catches her off-guard. Because the truth was she hadn't tried to fight Alvarr. Why? She hated the man, yet she had allowed him to kiss and touch her without putting up much of a struggle.

If Alvarr was drug-dealing, abusive, alcoholic and she'd let him kiss her, then what was she? Was she worse than him? Or just less intelligent to not try and defend herself? She hadn't really had much time to react, anyway. Okay, that was it. That was her excuse. She hadn't fought Alvarr because Hunith and Morgause had gotten there so quickly she didn't need to. There. That sounded pretty decent.

"Morgana? You went off with the fairies. I wanted them to bring you back," he half smiles and she returns the small gesture.

"I didn't fight him. I didn't need to. Your Mum and Morgause got there pretty quickly." It wasn't really an excuse. Just bending the truth a little.

"Do you want me to punch him?"

"Why do you keep asking me that?" It had to be the third time already.

"I don't know. I thought that was what boyfriends were supposed to do. You know, beat up the guys who tried to hurt the girlfriend."

She stifles a laugh, not wanting to hurt his feelings. "Merlin, please don't take this the wrong way, but I don't think you'd be able to hurt anyone. It's just not in your nature."

"Is it in yours?"

"Yes. I think so." New Morgana could hurt people if she wanted.

"Oh, right. That's... good, then."

"But, please, don't think of me any differently after all of this. Nothing happened, Merlin. I love you."

"I love you, as well."

She smiles at his reply. It was only the second time they said that. It didn't sound cheesy and like they'd said it dozens of times already. She didn't want it to be like that. She didn't want to be one of those couples that said it so many times it became meaningless phrase, an automatic response every time they ended a conversation or needed to fill a silent gap between the two of them.

"Anyway," Merlin clears his throat and begins a new topic. "What do you want to do today? I should be getting a call back from the guys at the factory on Wednesday or Thursday to say whether I got the job or not. So we have approximately three whole days to do whatever you want."

She sits up at the proposition, the opportunity getting her attention, and Merlin does the same. "I think... I'm going to have shower and then you're going to help me find a job by going through the newspapers and looking online. We should also update my CV."

"Sounds good to me," he takes her hand in his and squeezes it gently. "I shall await your return," he tells her with a broad smile as she disappears out of the room to go into the bathroom, collecting a towel from the airing cupboard on the way there. She doesn't want the I-couldn't-find-a-towel-and-now-I'm-in-your-kitche n-practically-naked incident repeated and especially not for Hunith.

She steps into the shower cubicle and sets the water to the hardest and hottest setting she can stand without it burning or hurting her skin. It hammers down on her back and shoulders, relieving tension she hadn't known was there.

She stands there for a while, not doing anything apart from just letting the hot water pour down onto her, the liquid heat spreading around her body. It was technically summer now, but still not very sunny at all. Most of the time it rained. Perhaps she should migrate to a hotter country.

Morgana shrugs off the thought and turns to reach for the soap. A sudden rush of cold air creeps up the backs of her legs and she whips round to see Merlin entering the shower, too. She lets out a gasp of surprise before she can stop herself and attempts to cover her body, still with the bar of soap in her hand.

"Merlin!" She hisses at him, but he just smiles. "What on Earth do you think you're doing?"

"Having a shower," he explains casually. "I missed you."

"I haven't even been gone that long!" Morgana insists, but he doesn't seem to care.

Are you using this or not?" He takes the soap from her hand and starts rubbing it into his left arm and over his chest.

"Yes, but- What if your Mum comes in?"

"I don't know. What if my Mum comes in?"

"Well, we're both naked," she points out, just in case he hadn't noticed yet. She tries to stop her gaze lingering on certain parts of his body and he appears to be doing the same.

"Of course we are. You don't have a shower with clothes on, do you?" Merlin starts rubbing soap bubbles onto her shoulder instead of his own. "Anyway, I'm also doing an experiment.

She narrows her eyes at him. "What experiment?"

"To see if two people can fit in the shower. And they can. Which is a good thing."

Her expression softens and she arches an eyebrow at him, a smirk forming on her lips. "And why is it a good thing?"

"Just, you know, for later... activities." He struggles on which is the correct term to use.

"What kind of activities?"

"Um, nice ones," he says, flashing a cheeky grin and massages soapy hands into her skin.

X

Eventually, they go downstairs together. Nothing had actually happened in the shower, apart from some very passionate kissing and rubbing soap onto each other in places they probably shouldn't have, but it had still made them grow more and more frustrated about their two month wait.

Hunith is busy frying some bacon in the kitchen, the strong smell wafting out to greet them as they walk hand in hand into the room.

"Is that the same frying pan you used to smash Alvarr around the head with?" Morgana questions as her and Merlin sit down at the kitchen table.

"No. The one I hit Alvarr with is the special one Merlin keeps behind the door. Just in case," she says in her usual sing-song voice and Merlin groans from embarrassment.

Morgana sends him an amused look and whispers, "You keep a frying pan behind the door for protection?"

"It came in handy, didn't it?" He quips and she laughs at his annoyed expression.

"Right, Morgana how do you like your bacon? Normal or cremated?" Hunith turns around to ask her.

"I don't want any, I'm not hungry."

"You're still eating it. So, how do you want me to cook it?"

"However you would normally cook it, thank you," Morgana says, a bit surprised by Hunith's forwardness. "Do you want me to help with anything?"

"No, no. Morgana, you're a lovely girl, but I'm not letting you anywhere near my cooking, going by past experiences."

"I can do the washing up, then?" She suggests but Merlin steps in.

"No, it's all right. I'll do that," he volunteers and she frowns at him.

"But I want to help," Morgana says quietly, tracing the shapes on the place-mats. Merlin doesn't hear her.

"Morgause rang about 15 minutes ago." Hunith says.

"I didn't hear the phone."

"We would have been in the shower," Merlin reminds her and she nods.

Hunith brings over a plate with a bacon sandwich on it and puts it down in front of Morgana. "We?" She asks, trying to look as innocent as possible.

Morgana turns to look at Merlin, who looks at her and then at Hunith. "Cutting down on water usage," he provides and Morgana sniggers at his useless answer.

"Of course you were." Hunith brings over two more pates, one for Merlin and one for herself. "Anyway, Morgause rang and told me that Alvarr's been arrested and being held at the station until he has to appear in Court in a few months. You've got to go and give evidence against him."

"I have to go? To Court? To give evidence?"

"You're the victim," Merlin answers her series of questions as he bites into his own sandwich.

"But what will I say? Will I have to say it in front of everyone? I know hardly anything about this, apart from what I've seen on TV and I'm sure most of that is made up," Morgana starts to go into a panic but Hunith calms her down again.

"That's why Morgause rang. She said she needed to meet up with you sometime soon so that you could go through what you're going to say."

"But she's not even a lawyer," Morgana protests. The New Morgana didn't need help. "Solicitor, or whatever. She just works for the police. I don't even know what she does."

"Perhaps she's just using her own free time to help you, then. But she knows all about these kind of things, so if I were you, I'd accept the offer," Hunith advises her and Morgana gets the impression that her word on this matter was final.

"So," Merlin starts. He looks a lot happier than he did earlier this morning. "Me and Morgana are going to look for a job today. I'm hearing back from the factory on Wednesday or Thursday, so we've got about three days to find one."

"When were you planning on doing that?" Hunith asks.

"This morning, probably. But we could always go this afternoon," he turns to Morgana who gives him a nod of approval.

"Oh. Well, I was hoping to speak to you this morning because my I'm going back to Australia tomorrow night and I was going to pack this afternoon so I didn't have to do it tomorrow," Hunith explains, finishing off the first half of her sandwich. Morgana had barely even started to eat hers.

"You mean it's been nearly a week already?" Merlin asks in disbelief. Morgana is amazed by this, too.

"Unfortunately, yes. And I was wondering, if it's not too much to ask, if I could come back and stay again sometime? Not right away of course, maybe in a month or two? I just feel like I haven't had the time I need to catch up and to get to know you properly," she directs the last comment at Morgana. "I think that this was probably one of the worst weeks I could have chosen to come and visit you."

"Of course you can!" Merlin exclaims. "Don't be silly, you can come over whenever you like."

"But I want to give you two time to settle down again. I know everything has been more than hectic lately, especially for you, Morgana, so I really want you to have more time together. Just the two of you. I think it will do you both good."

"Sure," Merlin agrees. "That sounds good."

"Wonderful." Hunith gets up from the table and piles her and Merlin's plates together. She glances over at Morgana's plate, which still has half of the food on it.

"Sorry," Morgana apologises but Hunith just smiles, taking the plate from her.

"I'll give it to Aithusa next time I see her."

"Where has that cat gone?" Merlin asks, looking around the room worriedly.

"No idea," Hunith admits walking over to the sink. "But she'll turn up when she needs us. Merlin, will you come and help me with this, now?"

"Yeah, in a minute." He turns to Morgana. "Do you want to go upstairs and get your stuff ready?"

"Okay." She gets up from the table and does as he says, giving him a quick hug before she leaves the room.

Merlin goes over to join Hunith, picking up a tea-towel to dry off the plates. "You wanted to speak to me?"

"Yes," Hunith confirms. "It's about Morgana."

X

Unfortunately, this is going to be my last chapter for a while because I think I need some time off from writing to unblock my head a bit.

Therefore, I tried to make this chapter a good one and hopefully I did okay? It was longer than I normally write and we got some Mergana in the shower which I hope everyone liked :)

Thanks for the reviews from last chapter! I have decided to reply to them at the start of the chapter now - sorry if that's a pain, but that way I don't forget to do it like I usually do.

Anyway, please tell me your thoughts in the box below if you get time! Thanks for reading!