"Now I know why people in your time don't wear long, black and purple robes." Said Miroku as he turned the air conditioner on higher. "It's TWICE as hot here!"
"Don't turn the air conditioner on!" Kagome insisted as she turned it off. "It pollutes!"
"But it's so HOT!" Inu-Yasha complained as he breathed and panted. "At least roll the windows down or let us put the top down."
"NO!" Kagome yelled. "People will think we can't afford air conditioning! I don't want people thinking poorly of us!"
"I don't care!" said Shippo.
"Seriously Kagome…" said Sango. "Do you think people are actually thinking that we can't afford air conditioning just cause we have our windows down?"
"Fine." Said Kagome as she motioned to all of them that they could roll their windows down.
"HURRAH!!" everyone cheered. Shippo bounced out of the car and on the roof. Inu-Yasha stuck his head out the window like a dog and let the breeze hit his face. (If you want, you can be creative and imagine him sticking his tongue out but if you don't want him to be doing that, he isn't. It's all up to you!)
Kagome stopped at a red light and a few people passed the car.
"Look Ma!" said some random kid. "Those people have their windows down! They must not be able to afford air conditioning!"
"Don't look Junior!" said Ma as she blocked Junior's eyes and hurried him along.
"So where are we going now Lady Kagome?" asked Miroku.
"Why…" said Kagome. "WE'RE GOING HERE!!"
Then she pulled into a huge parking lot.
"What is this place?" asked Sango as she looked around.
"It's a beach." Said Kagome. "You guys said you were hot. What better way to cool off than go to the beach!"
Then she tossed them all their swimsuits and led them to the changing rooms where they changed. (They did it willingly cause it's less clothing to have to wear when you're hot.)
Everyone walked onto the beach and were looking for an empty space to put all their stuff when suddenly…
"HEADS UP!!" came a voice.
"What?" asked Inu-Yasha obliviously as he turned toward the direction of the voice when suddenly, he was a hit with a flying volleyball and knocked to the ground. "WHO THREW THAT AT ME?!"
"I told you to get out of the way!" said the person who yelled heads up. "You're supposed to move, not look at me!"
"We're sorry." Said Kagome as she turned to the guy. "He's…new…"
Then she saw who it was.
"KAGOME!!" yelled Kouga as she hugged Kagome. "What are you doing hanging out with these people when you could be with me! You are my woman, after all and I plan on spending the rest of my life with you!"
"What are YOU doing here?!" Inu-Yasha demanded.
"Playing volleyball!" Kouga said back with a scoff. "How about you? What reason do you have being here dogface?"
"No!" Inu-Yasha yelled. "What are you doing in Kagome's time?!"
"Playing volleyball." Kouga repeated. "I thought I already told you that."
"Well, I suggest you leave." Said Inu-Yasha. "Because if I accidentally kill you, I don't want to be held responsible."
"YOU accidentally kill ME?!" Kouga yelled. "I can't even see myself getting hurt with you around!"
"Inu-Yasha…" said Kagome.
"WHY DO YOU ALWAYS TAKE HIS SIDE?!" Inu-Yasha demanded.
"Sit."
And then with a quack and a slam, Inu-Yasha was on the ground.
"Do you guys wanna play volleyball with us?!" said Kouga eagerly. "The team we were playing with just randomly got up and left in the middle of the game CLAIMING that we were cheating!!"
"You guys wanna play?!" said Kagome to everyone else.
"YAY!! SURE!!!" said everyone as they followed Kouga over to a volleyball net where Mohawk Minion and Other Minion were waving goodbye to Sessho-Maru, Jaken and Rin who were walking away looking all offended while they were ALL saying 'Sessho!!'
"You found more people to play?!" said Mohawk Minion as Kouga ran over and the three of them did a secretive handshake.
"Yeah but Kagome's on MY team!" Kouga declared. "Because you guys have five and we only have three."
"But we don't know how to play and no doubt you three are practically professionals." Miroku pointed out.
"Fine!" said Inu-Yasha. "Take Kagome! Do you really think I CARE?!"
"OUR SERVE!!!" declared Kouga as Inu-Yasha, Sango, Miroku and Shippo went over to the other side of the net. He hit it up over the net. All four of the people on the other side dived on top of it at the exact same time and smooshed Shippo who was on the bottom of course. All four of them…missed the ball.
"Point for us!!" said Other Minion.
Kouga ran over at the speed of light and picked up the ball. "One serving zero!!" he announced as he hit the ball over again.
"I got it!" said Inu-Yasha as he leapt up into the air and hit the ball so hard that it popped, deflated and fell to the ground in a big heap.
"Aww…that was my favorite volleyball." Said Kouga sadly as he reached into a bag that was on the sidelines of the court and pulled out another one. "But we have more so not to worry!! Now, since that fell on your side of the court, it's another point for us! Two serving zero!" He was just about to hit the ball when Kagome stopped him.
"Kouga, do you think that maybe I could serve?" she asked as her eyes began to sparkle and flower petals floated behind her. Kouga gasped and handed her the volleyball.
"Of course you may!" he said.
"YEE-HAW!!!" said Kagome as she threw the ball up into the air and went to hit it but completely missed so it fell down at hit the court.
"HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!" laughed everyone on the other team.
"Fault one!" said Mohawk Minion.
"You can do it Kagome!" said Kouga.
"Sorry about that!" said Kagome as she threw the ball up into the air again and this time hit it but it fell short and went under the net.
"Does that mean it's OUR turn to serve?!" said Miroku as the ball rolled over to him and he picked it up.
"Yeah, let's see what you can do!" Kouga taunted.
"All right!" said Miroku as he hit the ball underneath and gently lofted it over the net.
"I GOT IT!!!" yelled Kouga all-too-enthusiastically as he jumped up into the air and spiked it so hard that it drove into the ground and flung sand all over the place. He laughed manically at their expense in his insane, crazy voice that is so odd and makes us smile.
"Fault one!" Miroku announced as he ran over to the ball and dug it out of the ground.
"No." said Kouga. "It's OUR serve now."
"I thought we got TWO serves each." Said Miroku. "You got two serves, Lady Kagome got two so does that mean…"
"NO!!" Kouga yelled. "GIVE ME THE BALL!!"
"I see what you're doing…" said Miroku as he walked back over to the serving area. "One serving two!"
"NO!!" Kouga HOLL-ered. "YOU HAVE NO POINTS AND IT'S OUR SERVE!!"
"Miroku!" yelled Kagome. "Listen to Kouga, he's right!"
"Which happens on RARE occasions." said Inu-Yasha.
"Are you sure Lady Kagome?" Miroku asked.
"I'm positive." Said Kagome.
"Very well." Miroku said as he tossed the ball to Mohawk Minion. "I was not informed of the rules of the game so my game playing may be…"
"TWO SERVING ZERO!!" Kouga yelled as he served it over the net.
"I got it!" Sango said as she hit the ball straight up into the air. "Oops."
"I GOT IT THIS TIME!!" Inu-Yasha called out as he jumped all the way up to the ball and spiked it to the ground directly toward Other Minion.
"GET IT, OTHER MINION!!" Kouga yelled. "Don't let them score!!"
"I GOT IT!!" Other Minion yelled. Unfortunately, when you look up, the sun kinda looks like the ball so he got confused and started seeing spots and the ball dropped to the ground next to him.
"YOU FOOL!!!" Kouga yelled. "Now it's THEIR serve again! If you let them score, so help me!!"
"Forgive me Kouga!" pleaded Other Minion. "It won't happen again."
"It better not."
"Our serve?" asked Miroku as he picked up the volleyball. All the wolfish people and Kagome nodded. "OH YAY!!"
"Don't forget to rotate." Kouga reminded them. Then he turned to Kagome. "Do your friends know ANYTHING?!"
Kagome giggled. "Not about anything HERE."
"By the way Kagome, do you like my bathing suit?" Kouga asked as he modeled his bathing suit. It was bright red and had drawstrings.
"It's…very nice." Said Kagome.
"This isn't very fun." Whined Shippo as he commenced in building a sand castle right in the middle of the court.
"So…zero…serving two." Said Miroku as he held the ball up with his right hand and was about to hit it when he switched the ball to his left hand. "Hm… which hand should I hit it with?"
"It doesn't matter!" Kouga yelled. "JUST SERVE THE BALL!!"
"Well, last time, I hit it with my RIGHT hand but it was quite awkward and it didn't fly very hard…" said Miroku as he moved the ball back and forth.
"It didn't fly very hard because you are a weak human being!!" laughed Kouga as he started flexing.
"Well you demons sure are rude and arrogant." Said Miroku.
"DON'T GENERALIZE!!!" yelled Shippo.
"Just serve it!!" yelled Kouga. "I'm getting horribly impatient and when I become horribly impatient, I become very obnoxious to be around!!"
"You're always obnoxious to be around!" Inu-Yasha said.
"Come over here and say that you worthless half-demon!!" said Kouga as he started stomping over to the net. Inu-Yasha stomped over to the net and the two of them started throwing insults at each other.
"People in your world certainly are prejudice." Said Kagome, shaking her head.
"I'm not." Said Sango.
"What are you talking about?!" yelled Kagome. "You exterminate demons for a LIVING!!"
"That doesn't mean I'm prejudice!" Sango pointed out. "It just means that I want to keep the humans safe."
"Kouga's right though." Said Mohawk Minion. "Unless you're a demon, or you, Kagome, you wouldn't be missed if you were wiped off the face of the earth." Then the two minions chuckled warmly.
"Okay, let's stop arguing and…" started Kagome but she realized that everyone was just ignoring her. She cleared her throat a few times but when no one responded or even reacted or acknowledged the fact that she was alive, she walked over to the quarrel between Kouga and Inu-Yasha and said…"SIT!!"
"Why do you do that?!" yelled Inu-Yasha as he spat sand out of his mouth.
"It's the only way I can get everyone to listen to me!" Kagome replied even though that wasn't really true. "I think we should just stop arguing and continue playing volleyball like civilized human beings."
Everyone paused.
"The only humans here are you, Sango and Miroku." Said Other Minion.
"SILENCE!!!" yelled Kagome.
"Let's just play!" said Miroku as he grabbed the ball and served it.
"Ah HA!!!" laughed Kouga as he hit the ball over like a guy who likes to play volleyball.
"MY BALL!!" HOLL-ered Shippo as he turned into a giant pink ball with a face and the volleyball bounced off of him and made its way over to the other side again, sailing way above everyone but would have surely landed inside the thing, claiming a point of the Inu-Yasha side!!
"Mohawk Minion!!" yelled Kouga as he ran over to Mohawk Minion. Mohawk Minion put his hands down just as Kouga jumped onto them. Mohawk Minion hoisted Kouga into the air and tossed him up just as the ball came over and Kouga hit it!! Wow, they ARE professionals!!
"Someone do something impressive with me!" yelled Inu-Yasha as he jumped up and scissor kicked it high into the air and then Sango leapt up and spiked it over on the other side.
Other Minion dove down and hit it into the air and Kouga hit it over since he is a ham and must be involved in every play.
The ball made its way over to Miroku and he gently tapped it forward but it was JUST hard enough to make it over the net.
"It's my turn now!" Kagome exclaimed as she dove forward but only crashed into the net and knocked it over. The ball hit her on top of the head and then landed on the ground.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" yelled Kouga. "THEY GOT A POINT!!!"
"WAH HA HA HA HA HA!!" Inu-Yasha laughed while pointing at Kouga.
"Don't let it happen again!" Kouga yelled at his minions.
"We're sorry Kouga!" the minions pleaded pathetically.
"I think it's time to use plan B." said Kouga to himself. "Now who to go after? Not the woman…that would just be wrong. It would be hard to get dogface down with one quick strike so maybe I should avoid him. Going after the kid would be pointless so THE MONK IT IS!!"
Of course, Kouga not one for inner monologue so Inu-Yasha, with his SUPER HEARING, heard every word of this. (If anyone else were listening, they would have been able to hear more than 'the monk it is' because he kind of yelled that at the top of his lungs and you don't NEED super hearing to hear that.)
"Trying to cheat?" Inu-Yasha asked in the feh tone.
"Me? CHEAT?! NEVER!!" Kouga defended.
The ball was tossed back to Miroku.
"Try and serve it like LAST time." Said Shippo to Miroku.
"That's my goal." Said Miroku as he tossed the ball up and served it.
"WE SHALL NEVER BE DEFEATED!!" Kouga yelled as he climbed on top of Mohawk Minion and spiked the ball down toward Sango.
Kouga then climbed down from his minion and made his way over to the other side of the court and STRAIGHT TOWARD MIROKU!! ARGH!!
Inu-Yasha got some good air off of Shippo's head and did some sort of nifty Spiderman movement, jumped in front of Miroku and kicked Kouga in the face. Then, while still in the air, he stretched his body out and hit the ball over the net before Sango could hit it.
"I could have gotten that." Said Sango in an annoyed tone.
"No you couldn't have." Said Inu-Yasha. "You should be THANKING me."
Kouga fell on the ground with a thump.
Kagome hit the ball over the net and it just so conveniently landed RIGHT ON KOUGA'S FACE!! HAW HAW HAW!! CHEATERS NEVER PROSPER!!
"Get back to your side!" Inu-Yasha yelled as he kicked Kouga a few times.
Kouga stood up, scoffed and then spit all the sand out of his mouth. Then he walked back over to his side and to Kagome.
"Kagome, this game is getting a little rough." Said Kouga. "I don't know if I want you playing anymore."
"I'll be fine." Said Kagome. "I've spent the last…WHO KNOWS HOW LONG with these four. Nothing they could do now could POSSIBLY hurt me."
"But you look tense." Said Kouga as he caressed Kagome's head. "Perhaps you should rest."
Kagome pushed Kouga away. "Yes." She said. "I AM feeling a little tense."
Then a light bulb formed above her head. She ran off and left everyone standing there obliviously for a second or two.
Kagome returned a second later with a CD player.
"We need a little bit of music to lighten the mood!" Kagome announced as she pressed play. Suddenly, the sound of some HORRIBLE remake of a song started playing. It was sung by a group of kids so it sounded even worse.
"NOT SUGAR BEATS!!" yelled Miroku as he dramatically dropped to the ground.
"The mood will be lightened now!" Kagome said with horseshoe eyes. "EVERYBODY loves Sugar Beats!"
"WHAT IS THAT HORRIBLE RACKET COMING FROM THAT MAGIC NOISE EMITTING BOX OF YOURS, KAGOME?!" Kouga yelled as he covered his ears. He was yelling a lot louder than he needed to as if she was blasting the Sugar Beats loud at a dance or something.
"It's my favorite." Said Kagome as a tear started to form in her eye.
Kouga looked over at her and noticed that she was sad so he ran over at the speed of Kouga and grabbed her hands. "I love it!!" he said through clenched teeth that Kagome obviously didn't notice since she beamed.
"Oh geez." Said Inu-Yasha since he doesn't really have an opinion on the Sugar Beats and could really care less and can't figure out why everyone makes such a big deal about it. Then he realized at that very moment that the Sugar Beats had suddenly completely stopped very abruptly. He looked over to see Miroku whistling innocently while stringing the rosary back around his wrist. Then Miroku noticed that Inu-Yasha was watching him.
"What?!" he demanded, looking around.
"Hey Kouga, can we get back to the game?" asked Mohawk Minion.
"SURE!!" said Kouga.
"What about the Sugar Beats…" started Kagome.
"OUR SERVE!!!" Kouga declared before Kagome could continue and look for the Sugar Beats. "After all, it landed in your half." He grabbed the ball and stood in the server's place or whatever. "Two serving one!" he said as he served the ball to the other side.
At that exact moment, Kouga decided to test inner monologue. "Let's see…" he thought. "Dogface seems very weary about my evil plots of cheating so I have to take him out first. But the problem is, he's part demon so one blow won't eliminate him as one of my problems! If I were to just…"
"Kouga!!" yelled Kagome.
Kouga turned around and got hit in the face with the volleyball again. The ball dropped to the ground. CHEATERS NEVER PROSPER AGAIN!!
"I was so wrapped up in my evil plots that I didn't even notice what was going on!!" he tried to explain.
"Don't worry Kouga, we still love you!!" said Other Minion as he and Mohawk Minion bombarded Kouga with presents and words of reassurance and other things like that.
"Feh!" said Kouga, feeling confident again. "You may have the serve but you will gain no point!!"
"Yeah right!" Inu-Yasha argued. "With our star server, we are sure to win!!"
"Why thank you, Inu-Yasha." Said Miroku, looking flattered.
"Not YOU!!" yelled Inu-Yasha. "ME of course!!" And with that, he tossed the ball up into the air and hit it over the net. It went sailing about a thousand miles all the way to the water where it would float around for all eternity until finally washing on shore of some island and some man who has been living alone will befriend him and name it Wilson.
"Aw man." Said Kouga as he shielded his eyes from the sun and watched the volleyball sail. "Not another one. I lose more good volleyballs that way." He trudged over to the bag and picked up a new volleyball. "Fault one!" he said as he rolled it under the net.
Miroku picked it up. "I think I shall serve!" he said.
"What?!" yelled Kouga. "You can't do that!! The server, which is Dogface, must COMPLETE his serving turn!!"
"Oh that's okay, we can let the rules slide!" said Miroku.
"No way!!" yelled Kouga. "That's utter and complete cheating!!" Then he paused and got a devious look on his face. "Time out!! I need to consult with my teammates!!" Then he called everyone into a huddle.
"What do you wish of us?!" asked Mohawk Minion.
"You two are useless in my plan!" Kouga said harshly and loudly as the two minions cowered in fear. Then he turned to Kagome and lowered his voice to a whisper which is pretty much a new accomplishment for him. "Now listen, I'll hit the ball over to Inu-Yasha every time and every time I hit it over to him, you say your magic word that makes him slam to the ground and that'll be another point for us! We'll win in no time!!"
Kagome gave him a questioning look.
"But that's…CHEATING!!" Kagome said as if she were appalled.
"Yeah?" Kouga asked. "So? THEY'RE the ones who are cheating! Letting the monk serve when it is CLEARLY dogface's turn!"
"Well, you were the one on THEIR side of the court." Said Kagome.
"I was…uh…FIXING MY BATHING SUIT!!" Kouga said.
"Ah…" said Kagome sarcastically. "That makes sense."
"So do you get the plan?" Kouga asked.
"Yeah…" said Kagome. "But I think we should play with no more cheating."
"Come on!" Kouga whined. "Haven't they been pestering you non-stop this whole trip?! Look at them! They formed a team…WITHOUT YOU!!"
"You were the one who pulled me over onto your team." Said Kagome.
"Because you are my woman." Said Kouga. "And also because I didn't want your feelings to be hurt because you weren't on their team."
"TODAY!!" Inu-Yasha yelled from on the other side of the court.
"FINE!!" Kouga yelled.
"I don't see why you always have to be flirting with Kouga anyway, Kagome." Said Inu-Yasha.
"I WASN'T flirting!" Kagome yelled.
"Not again." Said Sango as she slapped her forehead.
"This ALWAYS happens when Kouga's here." Said Shippo.
"SERVING!!" Miroku yelled as he hit the ball over the net.
"I got it!" said Kouga as he hit it over the net to Inu-Yasha. Then he turned to Kagome with a devious smile and wink.
"Next time." Kagome mouthed to Kouga. Kouga nodded and did the Mr. Burns style 'excellent'.
"SHIPPO!!" Inu-Yasha yelled as the ball sailed over his head in slow motion. "Get the ball!"
Shippo leapt forward and jumped on top of Inu-Yasha's head with his tongue hanging out. He leapt up and spiked the ball down on the other side. Then he grabbed onto the net like it was a basketball hoop and hung on it for a second while making faces as if a camera was there.
"Ready Kagome?" asked Kouga. Kagome nodded hesitantly as Kouga bopped the ball over the net to Inu-Yasha. Inu-Yasha looked ALL too ready to hit the ball when SUDDENLY!!!
"Sit!" Kagome yelled.
"QUACK!!" Inu-Yasha yelled as he slammed to the ground. Then the ball came down, bounced off Inu-Yasha's head and hit the ground.
"Now if THAT wasn't cheating, I don't know what is." Said Sango.
"IT'S NOT FAIR!!" Shippo cried.
"OUR SERVE!!" Kouga cheered as he did a little victory dance. "OUR TEAM IS THE BEST!!"
"DAMN IT!!" Inu-Yasha yelled. (You know, 'CHIKUSHOU!!') "Why did you do THAT Kagome?!"
"Well…" started Kagome but she didn't really have a good reason.
"I'M going to call MY team into a huddle then!" said Inu-Yasha as the whole team ran over to him. "All right, Kouga's playing REALLY dirty so we have to do the same thing!" And with that, the camera panned out so you couldn't hear their evil schemes.
"They're just stalling!" Kouga declared randomly.
"No way, we're ready to go!!" Inu-Yasha said as they all clapped their hands together and said 'BREAK!!' "SERVE IT YOU WIMPY WOLF!!!"
"YOU BETTER BE READY DOGFACE!!" Kouga yelled back as he served the ball over to him.
"Sit!" Kagome said before Inu-Yasha could hit it. But, before the ball hit the ground, it suddenly started hovering and then flying in the opposite direction towards Miroku as he stood there with his accursed hand out. As soon as the ball came close to him, he closed up the void within him and then hit the ball over the net to the other side. Everyone was just kind of standing there in a stupefied state with their jaws on the ground like cash registers so the ball bounced a few times and rolled RIGHT over to Kouga's feet.
"Wait…" he said slowly.
"Our serve!!" Miroku said.
"Aawwwwwwwllll…RIGHT!!" said the whole Inu-Yasha team as they jumped up into the air and slapped each other five in a big Power Ranger like group.
"We'll get those points back!" Inu-Yasha said as he tossed the ball over to Miroku, the designated server.
"One serving three!" he said as he threw it up and then hit it. Mohawk Minion smiled smugly and leapt up to hit it but Miroku opened up the air void within him, pulling the volleyball back over to their own side. Sango eagerly slammed the ball to the ground while yelling a battle cry and the ball embedded itself in the sand. Mohawk Minion…well, he thought he hit the ball and got all discombobulated and plummeted to the ground.
"STOP CHEATING!!!" commanded Kouga as he pointed dramatically at them.
"NO!!" Inu-Yasha yelled back.
"Fine then!!" Kouga said. "Then we will get dirtier and dirtier!!"
"And so will we!"
"I'd like to see you try!"
"Same with you!!"
By this time, Inu-Yasha and Kouga were both in each other's faces with only the net between them while growling like wolves and dogs would. HEE HEE HEE HEE!!
Then abruptly, they both ran back over to their groups while plotting more ways to cheat.
Miroku served the ball, it went over. Kouga hit it. Inu-Yasha leapt up and was about to do some dramatic spike when…
"SIT!!"
And then fell down ON TOP of the ball and landed on it.
"Let's rule that word out of our cheating game!!" Inu-Yasha yelled as he slammed his fist down on the ground.
"It's simple, Inu-Yasha, just don't go for the ball." Said Shippo.
"But then what's the point of me being here?!" yelled Inu-Yasha.
"We'll just have to come up with a plan to get around that." Said Sango.
"I don't think we can." Said Miroku with a sigh.
"But we CAN think of OTHER things to do!" said Inu-Yasha as he whispered his evil schemes but we can't hear them. Sniff.
"Our serve!" said Kouga as he served the ball over the net. Inu-Yasha jumped up to spike the ball and Kagome was just about to yell the word that subdues him so when suddenly, little tiny blue flames flew in front of her.
Inu-Yasha spiked the ball down and it hit the ground so hard, it created a crater. Then he ran over and high-fived Shippo for his little 'Fox Fire' distraction.
"OUR SERVE!!" Miroku cheered as hit the ball over the net.
"Wait a second…" said Kouga as the ball just kinda…FELL next to him.
"WE GOT A POINT!!" cheered the Inu-Yasha team.
"I WASN'T READY!!" Kouga whined.
"Why didn't you hit the ball?" asked Mohawk minion.
"Because they didn't serve correctly." Said Kouga. "They're supposed to say the score first. I was all confused and thrown off. That point doesn't count!"
"WHAT?!" Inu-Yasha demanded. "OF COURSE IT COUNTS!!"
"NEVER!!" Kouga yelled.
"Kouga…" said Kagome as she folded her hands. "They are behind. I don't think one point will hurt."
"Kagome." Said Kouga. "I know we can easily win this so I will be merciful and allow them to keep their ill-gotten point!"
"How gracious of him." Said Miroku sarcastically.
"BUT DON'T LET THEM GET ANOTHER POINT!!" Kouga yelled.
"YES SIR!!" said both of the minions as they saluted Kouga.
"I'm getting REALLY sick of this game." Said Sango. "I'm all for leaving and going to the NEXT state."
"NO!!" Inu-Yasha yelled. "We MUST beat this wimpy wolf! There is no way I will back down from him!!"
"Whatever." Said Sango.
"Two serving three!" said Miroku as he served the ball.
Suddenly, about forty of Kouga's minions came and stacked up on top of each other, forming a wall so the ball just fell back on the Inu-Yasha team's side.
"OUR SERVE!!" Kouga announced.
"What about faults?" Miroku asked.
"I've decided that you don't get one." Said Kouga as he played around with the ball. "Since I overlooked your mess-up and practically gave you a free point, I think it's only fair."
Inu-Yasha mumbled a few incoherent swear words under his breath and was just about to smite Kouga when Kagome uttered the magic word and his mumbles turned to quacks.
"Three serving…" started Kouga.
"WAIT!!!" yelled Shippo. "Doesn't somebody ELSE have to serve now?!"
"No!!" yelled Kouga. "Your monk is the only one who ever serves!!"
"Yeah Shippo, shut up!" said someone.
"Fine!!" said Shippo, crossing his eyes.
"Four serving two!" Kouga declared as he served it over. Inu-Yasha caught the ball and popped it.
"You did NOT have four points!!" he yelled as he tossed the deflated ball at Kouga's feet. "You only had THREE!!"
"STOP POPPING MY VOLLEYBALLS!!!" HOLL-ered Kouga as he grabbed another ball from his bag. "And we DO have four points!!!"
"Kouga…please…just admit that we only have three…" said Kagome as she tried to calm down Kouga's extreme adrenalin rush. Kouga sighed and said FINE.
"THREE serving two!" he said as he served it.
Shippo jumped up into the air as he formed a thousand copies of himself and they formed a wall in front of the net so the ball fell back onto their side.
"HEY!!" yelled Kouga, throwing a temper tantrum. "THAT'S CHEATING!!!"
"You did the very same thing!!" yelled all the Shippos. Then he became only one Shippo again.
"But that was DIFFERENT!!!" Kouga explained. "They did that on their own free will!! I influenced it in no such way!!"
"You cheat AND lie!!" Inu-Yasha said as he started growling and frothing.
"I don't have to listen to YOU!" said Kouga as he snapped his fingers and Mohawk Minion retrieved the ball and handed it to Kouga. "So I got one fault? Do I look like I care? Do I? Just look at me! Do I look at all like it bothers me in the least bit that I got a fault?!"
"We didn't get a fault so neither do you!" Sango said, starting to get into the game.
"HA!!" laughed Kouga. "I am by far the most superior demon here!! It's MY volleyball!! It's MY net!! And as far as you're concerned, it's MY beach so what I say goes and I say that was fault one and now I'm serving again!! Three serving two!!"
"OH YEAH?!" yelled Inu-Yasha as he picked up a piece of driftwood and smacked the volleyball like a baseball and then it went off into a oblivion where it surely hit some random bystander who died.
"Inu-Yasha…let's get this straight…" said Miroku. "The object of the game is not to hit the volleyball as far as you possibly can. That just gives a point to the opposite side."
"I know that." Said Inu-Yasha. "Just watch though."
"Now I have to get ANOTHER ball!" complained Kouga as he walked over towards the bag. Suddenly, he tripped over that SAME piece of drift wood and fell flat on his face. Mohawk Minion and Other Minion gasped dramatically and darted over to his side while helping him up as Inu-Yasha laughed diabolically at his expense.
"What did that prove?!" yelled Kagome.
"NOTHING!!" laughed Inu-Yasha. "I just wanted to see that wimpy wolf fall face first in the sand!!"
"SIT!!" yelled Kagome. And with that, Inu-Yasha fell face first in the sand as well with a quack. "Well, how do you like that?! I just wanted to see YOU fall face first in the sand!"
"You're favoring that wolf!!" yelled Inu-Yasha as he sprang up off the sand.
"I AM NOT!!"
"YOU ARE!! YOU'RE TAKING HIS SIDE!!"
"NO I'M NOT!!"
"YES YOU ARE!!"
"SIT!!!"
"QUACK!!" And he was face first in the sand again.
"I decree that Lady Kagome should not be permitted to say that word." Miroku said suddenly as Kouga rejoined the game. "I find it unfair that she reins supreme advantage over one of our players."
"Fine then you can't use that freak air void of yours!" Kouga bargained. "If you open it or if Kagome says 'sit' then you're out of the game from now on!"
Miroku sighed. "Fair is fair." He said.
"Four serving two!" Kouga said as he hit the ball over the net.
"Finally I get to do something!" said Inu-Yasha as he hit the ball back to the other side.
"I got it!" said Mohawk Minion as he hit it like a professional volleyball player. But alas, even professional volleyball players have their off days and the ball poomped off his arms and dribbled under the net. Mohawk Minion looked over at Kouga whose eye was twitching madly. "I didn't mean it!!" he yelled as he covered his face.
"Now we get to serve!" said Shippo happily.
Miroku picked up the ball and served it over. Other Minion hit it back and then Sango hit it back over. Kouga leapt up to do some kind of fancy-rific hit back that would have SURELY given his team the serve again when Miroku suddenly whipped out little slips of paper and threw them at Kouga. The pieces of paper hit him on various parts of his body, one being on his face of course, and started emitting electricity and then he fell to the ground while yelling out in pain. Everyone paused as the ball hit the ground soon after Kouga did. Then Kagome looked over at Miroku who was gaining some high fives from his team.
"I'll help you, Kouga!" said Kagome when she noticed that Mohawk Minion and Other Minion refused to go near the demon wards. She took of all the demon wards and Kouga immediately sprung up.
"WE DON'T ALLOW CHEATING THAT CAUSES PAIN!!!" he yelled.
"What are you talking about?!" yelled Inu-Yasha. "You were coming over to our side and attacking us!!"
"That's different!" Kouga said defensively. "Demon wards aren't allowed!!"
"I don't have anymore anyway…" Miroku said as if that would make Kouga very sad.
"If that's the way you wanna play it then you better be prepared!!" Kouga announced as he gestured for his minions to come over and make a huddle with him.
"Be prepared!! Yeah, I'll be prepared!" said Mohawk Minion with a laugh but then he paused and looked confused. "Prepared for what?"
"The death of the monk!!" Kouga replied dramatically.
"Why, is he sick?" asked Other Minion.
"No you fool, we're going to kill him." Kouga answered. "And Inu-Yasha too."
"Oh yeah! Who needs cheaters? No cheaters! No cheaters! La la la la la la!!" said Other Minion and Mohawk Minion as they danced around Kouga.
"You imbeciles!" Kouga said, turning red now. "There WILL be cheaters!!"
"But you said…" started Mohawk Minion.
"WE will be the cheaters!" Kouga explained as he stood up on a rock as green smoke exploded behind him. "Stick with me and you'll never lose at volleyball again!!"
"Um…Kouga?" said Kagome as she tapped Kouga on the shoulder. He turned around and turned back to his regular color and all the smoke and spooky background singers disappeared as well.
"Yes Kagome?" he said.
"Could we avoid killing anybody?" she asked.
Kouga stared at Kagome for a moment as if she had just asked him NOT to kill anybody. Then he let out a heavy sigh and turned back to his minions. "Okay, forget the killing idea." He said sadly.
"Aww…" said Mohawk Minion and Other Minion as they deflated with unhappiness.
"Many thanks, Lady Kagome." Said Miroku as he did the little one handed pray thing.
"You heard our evil plots?!" demanded Kouga.
"Of course we did!" said Sango. "You guys were yelling loud enough so that the whole beach could hear you!" They all looked around to see that they now had an audience around them.
"GET OUTTA HERE!!!" Kouga bellowed. All the people screamed in terror and darted away.
"I do believe that it is still our serve and we have just acquired a point." Miroku said as he threw the ball into the air. "Three serving four!" he said as he hit the ball. Other Minion easily sailed the ball back over to the other side.
"I got it!" Sango declared. At that moment, Kouga punched the ground so hard that it created a huge sand cloud and no one could see anything. He grinned cruelly because he was sure that that worthless human woman wouldn't be able to hit the ball when she couldn't even see it but little did he stop to think of was that there were OTHER people on the court.
Inu-Yasha sniffed out the location of the ball at the speed of light and hit it back over. Since everyone on the other side was so sure that they missed the ball, they were already engaged in their secretive handshake so the ball came over and hit Kouga on the head since cheaters STILL never prosper!! The ball bounced up and Kagome realized that now was her moment of glory and she'd finally do some contributing to the team so she volleyed off of Other Minion who was tending to Kouga in his state of confusedness and hit the ball with a big, powerful spike. When the sand cleared, everyone realized that she had spiked it very well hard into the ground but…ALAS!! She spiked it into her OWN side of the court!! HAW HAW HAW!! Can you believe that confusedness is actually a word?
"Oops…" said Kagome as she landed back on the ground.
A red aura of light was emitting itself around Kouga. "Now…now they have FOUR POINTS?!" he said in a very deep voice. It wasn't his usual silly voice because the guy who was voicing him made him sound more evil and was also growling while he spoke. "DOES THIS MEAN THAT WE ARE NOT WINNING BUT THEY ARE, IN FACT, TIED WITH US?!"
"Kouga, it's not that big of a deal!" said Kagome as she ran over to Kouga and started massaging his shoulders in vain attempt to calm him down.
"THAT'S IT!!" yelled Kouga. "NOW I'M MAD!! SOMEBODY FIGHT ME!!!"
"No!!" yelled Kagome. "Don't fight!!"
At that exact moment, Kouga realized that Kagome was massaging his shoulders so he turned around and looked all happy with sparkles behind him and his mouth was open and in the shape of an upside down triangle and he had horse shoe eyes and other things like that. "Wow Kagome!" he said as he started leaping through a field of flowers while holding Kagome's hand and she looked just as happy and he did but then he got jerked back into reality when the volley ball came out of nowhere and hit him on the back of the head.
"OUR POINT!!!" laughed Inu-Yasha. "I can't wait to see what happens now," said Inu-Yasha to Shippo since Shippo just so happen to be sitting on his shoulder at that exact moment.
Kouga turned to his minions. "YOU TWO ARE USELESS!!!" he yelled as they immediately got down on their knees and bowed to him while saying 'WE ARE WORMS!!'
"Just keep telling yourself; 'It's just a game,' and you'll feel better." Said Kagome as she spun Kouga around. "It doesn't matter that they're winning."
As soon as she set that, the fact that they were winning finally occurred to Kouga. He took a deep breath, grabbed Kagome by the shoulders and lead her over off the court and sit her down. Then he walked back onto the court, under the net and straight over to Inu-Yasha who appeared ready for Kouga to punch him or kick him or something that Kouga would do. But instead, he only reached out his hands, grabbing Inu-Yasha around the neck and then proceeded to shake him around violently.
"Oh no!!" Kagome yelled when she realized that no one else was doing anything to stop this. "SIT!!!" And then Inu-Yasha fell to the ground but since Kouga was grabbing around his neck, he fell to the ground too!! Inu-Yasha sounded very much so like a duck and Kouga…well…he sounded like a moose.
"Why do I get punished when this wimpy wolf does something stupid?!" demanded Inu-Yasha as he kicked Kouga off into oblivion but he came back a second later.
"What else was I supposed to do?!" yelled Kagome.
"NOTHING!!" yelled Inu-Yasha. "I could have taking care of the problem by myself!! See?!" And then he punted Kouga off into oblivion again but yes, he DID come back a second later just like last time. After all, he's really fast because of the Shikon shards in his legs!!
"STOP DOING THAT!!!" commanded Kouga.
Just then, an extremely buff lifeguard in a bright red Speedo ran over. "I heard from many random bystanders that this game of volleyball has been getting out of hand." He explained in a tough, manly German accent. "Therefore, I have valiantly volunteered to be the referee and oversee the game to make sure there's no more cheating or harsh acts of violence."
"We won't have much of a game then," Sango whispered to Miroku.
"If I see any cheating then that particular player will be automatically disqualified from the game without any questions asked!" said the lifeguard who will be here forth known as AutoShapes!!
Everyone figured whatever and Miroku grabbed the ball. "Five serving four!" he stated while hitting the ball. Kouga went to hit the ball back but he was stopped by the loud sound of a whistle blowing. Everyone turned around to see AutoShapes waving his arms around.
"Illegal serve!" he said. "You have to have one foot on the serving line!"
"What is this 'serving line'?" Miroku asked, looking around.
"Fault one!" said AutoShapes.
Miroku decided not to give it a second thought and served the ball again.
"ILLEGAL SERVE AGAIN!!!" yelled AutoShapes.
"There is nothing illegal about my serves!!!" yelled Miroku as he opened up the air void in that right hand of his and sucked AutoShapes up right then and there. Then he took a deep breath and acted as though that didn't happen.
"Ah ha!" laughed Kouga. "You said you wouldn't open up the air void anymore! You are disqualified from the game!"
"It was for a good cause!" Miroku argued.
"No, you agreed to the rule and now you're out of the game!!" Kouga said as he turned into a giant Kouga and towered down on everyone on the other team while laughing diabolically at their expense.
"Don't worry, Miroku, the only reason he's being so persistent about this is because he knows that if we have an even amount of players then he'll lose." Sango said just loudly enough for Kouga to hear in a sad attempt to use reverse psychology on him.
It worked.
"THAT'S NOT TRUE!!!" yelled Kouga. He clenched his fist and shook it dramatically at them as if doing that was proving anything. So he turned to Other Minion. "Other Minion!! You're out of the game!!"
"Why?" asked Other Minion.
"I have to make it even and you're annoying me, that's why!!!" Kouga yelled quite loudly.
"Do not defy Kouga!!" Mohawk Minion said as he booted Other Minion off of the court.
"You know…you COULD just let Miroku PLAY and then Other Minion could come back on…" started Kagome.
"I know, Kagome, it's just the principal of the thing." Kouga replied.
"Since when did Kouga care about principals?" wondered Kagome.
"I guess this isn't too bad…" started Miroku as he watched some lady walk by with a very skimpy bikini on. He grinned absentmindedly and followed after her with a satisfied look in his eyes.
"You…" Sango said as hundreds of little intersection veins appeared on her forehead one by one. Then she looked at everyone else. "I'll be right back." And with that, she ran off in the direction that Miroku had gone in.
"Now they have less people than us." Kouga thought to himself as he watched Sango stomp away. "Should I A: Laugh at them and then point it out B: Point it out and then laugh at them C: Truthfully come forward and point it out without laughing D: Don't bring it up at all and hope no one notices E: Turn to Mohawk Minion and kick him out of the game F: Tell Other Minion to go on their team so that everyone can be fairly included G: Go beat up on Dogface H: Grab Kagome and run I: Devise more ways to cheat…"
"Hey Kouga…do you think we should make the teams fair?" asked Kagome.
"Um…YES!!" Kouga replied. "Mohawk Minion!! GET LOST!!!"
"Okay…" said Mohawk Minion as he hung his head low and trudged away. Kagome got a retarded little drop and decided not to say anything because Kouga seemed a bit edgy.
"It's just you and me, Shippo!!" said Inu-Yasha, turning to Shippo and slapping him five.
"This is such a diverse game we're playing!!" said Kagome right as Kouga was about to serve the ball. "We have a demon, a child demon, a human AND a half-demon!! ISN'T THAT JUST AWESOME?!"
Everyone slowly turned their heads and looked at Kagome.
"Well…I thought it was awesome…" said Kagome, feeling stupid.
"Kagome…it is MILDLY awesome." Said Kouga, trying to cheer her up since she looked ever so depressed.
"YAY!!" cheered Kagome, feeling smart again.
"Serve the ball already!!!" yelled Shippo.
"Wait, I don't think we should make your two minions sit out!" Kagome said as Kouga was about to serve AGAIN!! Of course, since she said 'sit' in her sentence, Inu-Yasha quacked and fell.
"There!!" yelled Inu-Yasha, pulling his face out of the sand. "She said 'sit' so she's out of the game!"
"It didn't have anything to do with the game though!" Kouga argued.
"Well when Miroku opened his hell hole he didn't have any intention of cheating yet he still had to sit out!" Inu-Yasha continued, looking all confident as if he had the upper hand during a fight with Naraku. Of course, one wouldn't know what Inu-Yasha looks like while fighting with Naraku considering Naraku doesn't have balls enough to come out and fight for himself. "So Kagome is OUT!!"
Kouga looked at Kagome. "There isn't anything I can do!!" he said.
"It's all right!" said Kagome, trying not to make Kouga spaz and pop a few blood vessels in his eye. "I didn't want to play anymore anyway!" Then she joined hands with Mohawk Minion and Other Minion and the three of them frolicked off to the water to play Marco Polo.
"Now, are you too cowardly to play by yourself, Dogface or do you need that fox child?" Kouga asked as he put the volleyball under his arm. Inu-Yasha grabbed Shippo by the collar and tossed him as far as he would go without even flinching at the fact that Shippo would probably land in the water somewhere and have to fend for himself against the sharks and puffer fish.
"Serve the ball." He commanded.
"FINE!!" Kouga yelled as he served the ball.
TWO HOURS LATER!!!
"Six serving six." Said Inu-Yasha as he served the ball over the net.
"NO!!" Kouga yelled. "Your last point didn't count!"
"Well if that didn't count, then that NEGATIVE point you gave me doesn't count either!"
"FINE! Just as long as THAT one doesn't count." Said Kouga. "NO ONE should get a point for the amount of cheating you did in that last play!"
"Oh and you DIDN'T cheat?!"
"I NEVER CHEAT!!"
"LIAR!!"
Then the two of them jumped into about the fiftieth fight complete with a big dust cloud and many scary sound effects.
"I'm so bored!!" Shippo whined as he turned into a floating balloon thing and chewed on Mohawk Minion's head.
"Me too!" whined Other Minion. "KOUGA!! Can we leave?!"
"PLEASE?!" pleaded Mohawk Minion.
"I'm all for leaving." Said Miroku as he dug a huge hole in the ground with his feet.
"Me too!" said Sango.
"Inu-Yasha, we're all bored!" yelled Kagome to Inu-Yasha.
"Then leave without me!" Inu-Yasha demanded. "I'm not leaving this beach until I beat this wimpy wolf at this game!"
"SIT!!" Kagome yelled. You know what follows. Slam, quack.
Then, while Inu-Yasha was subdued, Miroku and Sango ran over and started beating Inu-Yasha up until he was unconscious while Shippo tied him up.
Then, Miroku, Sango and Kagome hoisted Inu-Yasha over their heads and carried him to the car. They left Kouga standing there and to be dealt with by his two minions of different hairstyles.
Kagome buckled the tied-up Inu-Yasha into the front seat of the car and they screeched out of the parking lot.
"We can tell him that he was not defeated by Kouga." Suggested Sango. "They tied…I think…"
"Where did you put all my stuff from the other world, Lady Kagome?" asked Miroku as he searched around on the floor.
"In the trunk." Answered Kagome.
"Oh okay." Said Miroku. "I just want SOME way to harm Inu-Yasha or defend myself because I KNOW that I am not only going to be the first one he goes after but the ONLY one."
"NO!!" Shippo yelled. "HE'LL GO AFTER ME!! HE ALWAYS DOES!!"
Kagome wasn't really listening. She was too busy looking at the rows and rows of peach trees on the side of the road.
"By the way, we're in Georgia." Said Kagome.