Ali's POV

It was one in the morning when Billy came to me. Jamie was visiting her parents for a few days, for Thanksgiving weekend, so I had my room to myself.

I couldn't sleep, anyways. My stomach was hurting so badly; I had already vomited up all I could and there was nothing left, just the ache. Sorry, that wasn't the most pleasant picture, huh?

Well, I was tossing and turning around when little footsteps approached.

"Ali?" Billy whispered, poking my shoulder.

I jumped and nearly screamed. "Billy!" I whispered, harshly. "You're supposed to be in bed!" He wasn't allowed to walk around, it only made him sick.

"I couldn't sleep." He whispered, his eyes trained on his feet.

I sighed and scootched over so he could climb in bed with me. He automatically cuddled close and for a while we just stared at the ceiling, thinking life over.

"Ali?" He asked.

"Yeah, kitten?"

"Don't call me kitten."

"Sorry."

He fidgeted and kept his blue eyes trained on the lamp overhead, where this moth fluttered around aimlessly, wondering why there was no light.

"Ali?" He asked, again.

"Yeah... Bill?"

"Do... do you believe in God, Ali?"

I was quiet for a while and I could feel Billy toss around, nervous. "Yeah, Bill. I guess I do."

"Oh." He thought it over. "Why?"

"Because..."

Why did I believe in God, any kind of god, goddess... Buddha..., when things were so crappy? When I was actually dying? When Billy was dying?

"Because of ice cream sandwiches, I guess." I responded.

"Ice cream sandwiches?" His surprise was evident; he wondered if I was making fun of him.

"Yup. Ice cream sandwiches and taking a hot shower after going to the beach to get all the sand out of your hair. And owls hooting. And fried pickle chips. And the howl of the wolf. That's just God."

"That's just God." He murmured. "And... um, and Bach? Bach, too, right, Ali?" I nodded and he started to warm up. "And the violin. And opera. And karaoke night. And clapping. And... and Sarah. And Jamie. And Jack. And Mr. O."

He turned to me and searched my eyes earnestly. "There has to be some kind of god, Ali, because there's you. There's you and me and there's this really warm bed and we're together and I get to say goodbye."

I pulled him close to me. "There is definately you and me, Billy."

We stayed silent for a few more minutes, before I scooped him up in my arms. "We gotta get you back in bed before Sarah checks on you and worries."

He yawned and murmured, "You... and... and me... ice cream... and Bach..."

I set him down gently on his own bed and pulled the covers up around him. "I love you, Billy." I whispered.

Somewhere, in his dreams he must've heard me, because he smiled and put his small fist to his heart.

I woke up again an hour later.

And then again the next hour.

And then again.

The last hour before dawn, I heard voices in the hallway.

Slowly, I crept towards the door, knowing that if Kain caught me, I wouldn't get Jell-O for a week.

It was dark, but I could see that Sarah, Dr. Nilson, and a large unidentified person were hunched close together. Sarah's form was shaking. I came closer and realized that the other person was Paul.

Yeah. My Paul. I learned later that Sarah had called him for help.

Paul had his arm around Sarah, who's face was streaked with tears.

"Sarah?" I whispered, but she didn't hear me.

She kept on crying to Paul.

"It was for the best." She sobbed. "For the best."

"How... how will I...?" Paul whispered, horrified.

She smoothed his hair back, motherly. "Paul, there's something I learned a long time ago, after I worked here for a few years."

"And what's that?" He asked, his face pale, his eyes wet.

"Love... love is watching someone die."

I wished right then that I had not left my room, but it was too late.

I was in that hallway when the door next to mine opened.

I was right there when they wheeled the bed out, a blanket concealing something small.

Paul saw me, but could not stop me.

My hand reached out and grabbed the white sheet, as if it had a mind of its own. It pulled the sheet, revealing a small, pale little face. The face of an angel, frozen in a peaceful sleep. An angel with that same little smile still etched across his face.

"Billy." I whispered.

Do... do you believe in god?