A/N: So guess what guys? Guess? Guess? Okay… I love you guys. Yup. That's it. Soooo yeah. Enjoy?

"I swear James Potter, if I had a dollar for every time you've asked me to be you're girlfriend—" Lily started, obviously starting another one of her famous rants against James Potter's love.

"You'd be a millionaire." He interrupted her before she got the chance. He continued, "And if I had a dollar for every time you've crossed my mind, I'd have one dollar, because once you crossed my mind you never left."

"That's great. You know what would be even better?"

"What?"

"If you jumped off a cliff."

"Like a lemming!"

"A lemming?"

"You know, like, they say 'don't be a lemming.' Like, you know? They say if one lemming falls off a cliff, they all will jump off. So don't be a lemming and follow the crowd."

"We aren't even talking about following a crowd James. Besides, if you'd have done your research you would realize that lemmings don't actually jump off of cliffs, meaning that the entire fact that people say 'don't be a lemming' makes them lemmings."

James sat for a minute, trying to wrap his brain around this new piece of absolutely worthless information.

"Yeah. I figured you wouldn't get it."

"Will you go out with me Lily?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

"Sure!"

"Really?"

"When pigs fly."

"Oh… Hey Lily, if you hate me so much, how come we hang out so often?"

"Because you're always just… around."

"Thanks?"

"I didn't give you a compliment."

"Oh. Well… can I give you a compliment?"

"I'd rather you not but no one's stopping you."

"You're beautiful."

"Thanks James. You look like a dead cow sometimes."

"Why do most of your insults involve some sort of dead animal? I look like a dead cow? I sing like a dying walrus?"

"I don't know James, it's all I can think of at the time. Look, I'm really tired. I'm going now."

"WAIT! Don't go! Uhh… Uhh…. Orchideous!"

"That's sweet James, but I'm not in the mood for flowers. Aguamenti!"

"Phe. Phe. Did you seriously just squirt me with water? What the-?"

"Sorry. You were starting to annoy me."

"You know Lily, you're kind of mean."

"Thank you! You're finally seeing it!"

"I forgive you though."

"I'm going now."

"Goodbye Lily Flower!"

James strode off in search of his friend Peter Pettigrew. He needed some serious help.

"Wormy, I have a problem."

"Yes?"

"My conversations with Lily are becoming boring."

"Uhh… uhh… SIRIUS! James needs helpppp!"

"Yeah?"

"My conversations with Lily are becoming boring."

"Then do something exciting."

"Like what?"

"Well… hmmm… Hey! She always tells you she'll date you when pigs fly, right?"

"Right."

"Well then…. we'll make some pigs fly."

"How do we get a pig?"

"Uhh…. hmmmm…."

After thinking for a bit, Sirius was struck for an idea. Approximately two days and three hours later, Lily and her friends could be found staring up into the sky.

"What's that?"

"What's what?"

"In the sky."

"It's a bird!"

"It's a plane!"

"NO. It's a pig."

"But pigs don't fly!"

"That one does."

"Potter…"

Lily strode over to where she expected James to be, by a group of attractive girls, and yelled his name.

"JAMES!"

"What?"

"Why is there a flying pig?"

"Because I used a charm on it."

"Why?"

"Because you said you would go out with me when pigs fly."

"James, that's a muggle saying used to mean 'you have no chance because you are a loser.'"

"Wait… really?"

"Maybe not exactly that but… yes… pretty much."

"You mean I got that pig for nothing?"

"Yeah, pretty much. Wait, where did you even find a pig?"

"I found it at (find your perfect pig swine)…. You have to erase the spaces though when you type it into the search bar, or else WizWeb won't take it. "

Lily stared at him, puzzled.

"Sirius told me about it."

"Ohhh…."

"…"

"So are you going to get it down, or are you going to let it sit up there all day?"

"I was just going to let it sit up there all day… after all, it's pretty entertaining to watch."

"Ha. I'll say."

"Wait, what's it doing?"

"I think the charm is wearing off!"

"Oooh, and down it goes."

"Sirius looks mad…"

"NOOO! NO NO NO! NO! NOW I CAN'T GET A REFUND! AGH! I DIDN'T THINK TO GET THE WARANTEE!" He screamed, chasing after it. Poor Sirius….

A/N: I had to re-write this chapter several times for lack of entertainment quality… so yeah. Tell me what you think?

-Awesomegirl13