Chapter 26: Unraveling

Eli took a deep breath and again concentrated on reading Alice's memories.

"The doctor is still writing... He's talking to himself. He had thought the shock treatments and hydrotherapy sessions were helping - he seems confused by your setback. He decides to lengthen the sessions. What he's saying isn't making any sense to you; you wonder if he's working on charts for another patient. You ask him again about your parents and when you can see them. He tells you that he still hasn't heard from them. You insist that they promised they would return today. He suggests that you not get your hopes up. He left your room... You spend the rest of the day alone in your room. You're falling asleep... And we've just jumped ahead again. You're in a different room now. There are no windows but there's a small light in the corner. Nick just brought you a tray of food - he's dressed in the uniform of an asylum employee, and you don't seem surprised to see him."

Eli paused, seeming to continue scanning. I looked up at Edward. His eyes were closed and I knew he was still focused on watching the scan through Eli's mind. I glanced around the room. Alice still looked slightly frustrated; she was learning so many details from her last human days, and yet gaining so few real answers. She kept her eyes on Eli, waiting for him to continue, while Jasper rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb. Carlisle was leaning forward, eagerly awaiting the rest of the scan, and Esme leaned against his shoulder, looking worried. I remembered how she had asked Alice earlier if she was sure she wanted to continue this scan; she seemed concerned that Alice might learn more than she really wanted to know. Some of the memories Eli was accessing would, no doubt, be unpleasant.

"He stayed to watch you eat," Eli continued, "and he calls you by your real name, which you appreciate. You had a pleasant conversation and you seem to have enjoyed his visit. He looked as though he enjoyed it too. He left when you finished eating."

Jasper growled again when Eli mentioned Nick enjoying the visit.

"Not like that," Edward assured him. "He doesn't seem to be attracted to her in that way. Their relationship seems to have shifted from the romantic nature of the pen pal letters. Nick seemed to enjoy the conversation, and seemed to find her human perspective on things amusing. Alice was just glad to have someone to talk to who didn't seem to think she was crazy. I'm sure she didn't have many opportunities for social interaction in the asylum."

Alice whispered something in Jasper's ear and he smiled and nodded. Alice turned her attention to Eli again, waiting for him to resume the scan.

There was a brief silence while Eli scanned ahead some more before continuing. "A doctor stopped in later in the day. It's not the same doctor as before, but he's calling you 'Mary' like the first doctor did. You don't bother to correct him. He asks if you've seen Nick lately. You tell him no, remembering how they didn't believe you when you first told them he was working in the asylum and had been bringing your food. A nurse comes in and takes your blood pressure, checks your pulse, and draws some blood. She's taking you to another room for treatment... We've jumped in time again. You're back in the same windowless room. Nick just brought your food again. You beg him to take you outside like he used to. You tell him you really will go crazy if you have to keep staring at these walls. He seems to consider it and tells you he'll see what he can do; it's not as simple to get you out when there's no window. He leaves, and you go to sleep. You wake up and Nick is there in his uniform with a wheelchair. You excitedly hop into the wheelchair. He frowns and tells you that you look too happy...he suggests you pretend to be asleep, so you close your eyes and let your head loll to one side. A few minutes later you feel fresh air and open your eyes. You seem to be on the asylum grounds. There are a few other patients here and there. It's springtime; it seems you've been in the asylum for close to a year. Maybe even multiple years, since I have no way of determining how much of your memory was erased. Are you sure you were changed in 1920?"

"Yes, my first memories are from the summer of 1920," Alice told him. "What year did I enter the asylum?"

"Well, I was assuming 1920 earlier," Eli responded, "but that was because Edward had told me you were changed that year. To be honest, I wasn't paying any attention to dates when I did the first scan. I guess I depend too much on my ability to determine time based on the size of the index. Your memory had gaps that weren't discernable from the index. I guess everything I told you was off by a year."

"Edward, you didn't notice any dates at all in the previous scan?" Alice asked. "What about the letters from Nick? Weren't they dated?"

"I only see what Eli sees," Edward explained. "He had to really concentrate to read the letters. Human memories aren't as sharp as ours, and the parts you remembered from the letter when you were still human were the parts that were most vivid in the memories that Eli scanned. He never tried to concentrate on the dates of the letters, and I suspect you didn't pay much attention to the date when you read them. You knew they were recent and you just started reading the body of the letters. He just scanned the last letter again while I was talking. The date is not very sharp in your memory, but it does look like July of 1919. We can't quite make out the day of the month."

Alice looked thoughtful. "My tombstone and obituary said I died on July 21, 1919, and that was also the date on my admissions records. But the newspaper that contained the obituary was from August of 1920. I always thought that was odd. I had assumed they considered me dead when they placed me in the asylum, and didn't bother sending the obituary for publication until a year later, maybe when they were told I was missing, or had died, or whatever they were told. When Eli told me a few weeks ago that I only had about two weeks of negative memories at the end of my life, I thought I must not have entered the asylum until 1920. And perhaps the cemetery stone, obituary, and admissions records were all done by the vampire who was covering his tracks when James was after me, and he got the year wrong."

"Why would he have gotten the year wrong?" I asked.

"Not all of our kind pay attention to things like human dates, Bella." Carlisle explained."We do, because we live among humans, but those who consider humans to be nothing more than a source of nourishment might not keep up with something as trivial as what year it is. He could have just copied a date from another person's admissions record, and then used the same date on the cemetery stone and the obituary."

I nodded. That would also explain why the obituary was published in 1920. But based on what we knew now, the date on the admissions record was probably accurate. But why hadn't her parents come back to visit her? The theory that her parents considered her dead didn't fit with what we had learned about her loving childhood or how her mother had seemed to be having second thoughts about leaving her there. Alice really needed to visit her niece - maybe she could get some more concrete answers that way. But if her admissions record was accurate...

"So why do you think the doctor in the hospital thought you were someone else, if the admissions record you found was accurate?" I asked. "That would seem to indicate that it wasn't forged, and had been there all along."

Alice shrugged. "Maybe someone was trying to make me look crazy? Like Nick?"

"Nick could have altered the names on the chart the doctor was referencing, and he could have placed a different name plate outside your door," Edward said. "My guess is that he also hid your real admissions record and changed your identity so that your parents couldn't find you if they went back to the asylum asking about you. It seems Nick wanted to keep you there for some reason."

"The record was filed properly when I filched it," Alice told him. "It was in the archives under 'Brandon', filed between 'Boggs' and 'Branger'."

Edward just shrugged.

"So you're outside on the asylum grounds," Eli continued. "Nick pushes you in your wheelchair so that you're both hidden behind some bushes, you climb on his back, and he takes off with you. You're so happy to be outside you don't mind the speed anymore. He stops in the same clearing as before. You jump up and run around for a bit, enjoying the freedom and the fresh air."

"Jasper," Edward interrupted, apparently in response to his thoughts, "I assure you she wasn't having any romantic feelings toward Nick. The fact that she was riding on his back doesn't mean – "

"It's not that," Jasper insisted. "It's just that I remember how you felt after running with Bella that way. You were absolutely giddy with pleasure of sharing with her something that you enjoyed so much. I just don't like the idea of this Nick character experiencing that type of pleasure with her. I understand she didn't return his feelings even if he had any, and I understand that even if she did, she doesn't remember it and it doesn't mean anything. But that doesn't mean I'm going to like it."

"From what I'm seeing, it was just the most expedient means of transportation," Edward told him. "He didn't seem to be doing it for the fun of it."

"That's fine," Jasper replied. "I appreciate what you're trying to do, Edward, but please just ignore my thoughts of displeasure. I'm sure there will be a lot more I don't like. We're interrupting Eli, and Alice here is feeling a bit impatient."

Edward gave him a single nod, and looked back to Eli, seeming to signal him to continue.

Eli focused on Alice again, and for a moment he looked confused. "We seem to have jumped ahead again. You're still in the clearing but I think it's summer now. The trees and grass are a darker green, the grass is taller, and you're standing in a different spot in the same clearing. Nick looks upset. You've never seen him look angry before and it scares you. You ask him what's wrong, and he tells you someone has been there - someone like him. He called you by your name, which means a lot to you since he's the only one who still calls you 'Alice.' He doesn't seem angry with you, and you relax a little. You hesitantly ask him what that means, and he just tells you not to worry, that he will protect you. He says he needs to get you back to the asylum. You want to protest that you've only been outside for a couple minutes, but you can tell that he is serious and that he believes remaining there would be dangerous. Suddenly, you realize you're about to have company."

"Another premonition?" Alice asked.

"Yes, not a vision, but just a feeling you had. You just suddenly knew someone was coming. You start to tell Nick, who has turned his back to you so that you can climb on... and from behind Nick's shoulders you see James flash into the clearing. He seems to be alone. You immediately notice the pale skin and red eyes, marking him as one like Nick, but that's where the resemblance ends. James is not nearly as attractive, and from the sneer on his face you quickly discern that he is not as friendly.

"'What have we here?' James asked. Eli imitated James's voice perfectly as he quoted him, and it made my skin crawl. I hadn't thought I would ever hear that voice again.

Eli continued, imitating each voice as he relayed the conversation. "'She's mine,' Nick declared. He's holding his hands out protectively to keep you behind him.

"'You're keeping her as a pet?' he sneered, moving to get a better look at you. 'You've been here with her before.'

"'Yes. She's mine. I'm saving her for later.'

"'Alice, is it?' James spoke directly to you, and you felt a chill go down your spine. He inhaled deeply and murmured, 'Delectable.' He turned to Nick and introduced himself. 'Forgive me, I'm James. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance. I don't suppose you'd care to share your snack?'

"Suddenly you hear another voice - a female voice - from further off in the woods, shouting, 'James! I want that one! Save it for me!' You thought the voice sounded somewhat childish, and James was clearly annoyed to be hearing it."

I was fairly certain I recognized that voice, but I didn't want to interrupt Eli. I silently asked Edward, and he nodded and squeezed my shoulder.

"James muttered something," Eli continued, "but all you could make out was 'newborn' and 'trouble' and then he disappeared back into the woods as suddenly as he had arrived.

"Nick throws you onto his back and takes off with you just as you hear a thunderous crash deep in the woods. He takes you back to the asylum, retrieving your wheelchair from behind the bushes, and wheels you into the records office. You watch in horror as he snaps the neck of the lady at the desk. She didn't even have time to scream. You remain in the wheelchair, afraid to move, as he shuffles some papers around in some folders and re-files them.

"He takes you back outside, has you climb onto his back again, and he goes off into a different part of the woods, stopping occasionally to tell you to touch a tree or a flower. Terrified, you do as he asks. You're realizing how little you really knew about him, and you wonder if he's going to kill you the same way he killed the records lady. He turns suddenly and takes you back to the asylum grounds, then heads off in yet another direction. You travel for some time, and he finally stops at what appears to be an abandoned house in the forest. He takes you in through the second story window and you realize you're in a bedroom. He tells you to lie down and rest, that he will protect you.

"You lie down, not quite sure what to think. You hear Nick pull the door shut behind him as he leaves, followed by what sounds like a key turning in the doorknob. . You realize you've been locked in the room. You are simultaneously relieved to be away from Nick and terrified that he will leave you here alone. You lie there for several minutes. You don't hear Nick and you start to wonder if he's still in the house. You listen to the sounds of the forest, trying to calm yourself. You hear a door open and close, and then it's quiet again.

"An unfamiliar voice from somewhere in the house cuts through the silence. 'James? I've heard of him. He's a tracker.' There was a short pause, and then the same voice said, even more loudly, 'It doesn't matter what she hears.'"

I could tell from Eli's rendition of the voice that it was soft, deep, and melodic. It seemed somehow familiar to me, and yet I was absolutely certain it didn't match any voice I had ever heard before; my perfect recall assured me of that.

"'She won't be living much longer anyway,' a second unfamiliar voice added."

Eli used almost the same feathery voice to imitate the sound of the second vampire's speech. The voice was soft and subdued, but obviously loud enough to be easily heard by Alice's human ears.

Eli continued narrating Alice's memories. "You know they're talking about you, and even though you've known for a while that you wouldn't live much longer, it's still a bit shocking to realize that this day is likely your last. You're thinking of your family, missing them, and wondering why they never visited or came back for you.

"Then you hear Nick's familiar voice arguing with them: 'We'll just have to speed up the plans...make her safe.' You feel relieved to know he is still there and seems to want to protect you, but you're also terrified because you've known for some time now that you are going to end up like him and you're not quite sure how that's going to come about.

"The first voice said, 'You've become too attached; you're putting us all in unnecessary danger.'

"You hear the second voice again. 'We should leave this one for the tracker and find another.'

"Nick seems to be arguing with them but he's speaking too quickly for your human mind to process it - I can't make it out. The others are speaking more quickly too. You're straining to hear but you're only catching a few words here and there as they slow down or increase their volume. You hear Nick say, 'newborn who escaped.' You're wondering what that meant and you're imagining a human infant being kidnapped...or rescued. You can't make any sense of it in the context of the conversation.

"The first voice asked, 'Did you cover your tracks?'

"Nick's reply was spoken too quickly for you to understand.

"The first voice spoke again. 'Of course not! We're all much safer with those two on our trail.' He was sounding increasingly angry, and the sarcastic words were punctuated by a loud crash in the other room.

"The second voice was calmer but took on a tone of authority. 'She's become a liability. You have to let her go.'

"Nick's reply was again spoken too quickly for your human mind to process. You're wondering what he doesn't want you to hear.

"The first voice again: 'There will be others who are special.'

"The second voice: 'They could be working for them now. They could be... ' He continued but you couldn't catch the rest.

"You were surprised to be able understand Nick's answer this time, and you were surprised by the conviction with which he spoke. 'I'm not leaving her. I'm going to change her now. Even if James finds her, he won't be able to get what he wants. She'll be safe, and you'll see how valuable she is.'

"You realize he was wanting you to hear this; this was intended to comfort you, but your premonition of yourself with red eyes solidified, and you realized he was going to make you like him - it was both imminent and inevitable. You began screaming involuntarily.

"There was a loud ruckus in the other room and it distracted you from your screaming fit. It sounded to you like boulders colliding. I think the two must have been fighting with Nick, trying to stop him from changing you. You could hear furniture breaking, and the house shook as if there was an earthquake. You screamed again as you heard something crash into the door to your room, and you saw a crack appear in the solid wood door.

"The house suddenly became silent; you could hear birds chirping outside your window. You strained to hear something, anything, from the other room. Had they left you?

"You hear the first voice again, speaking more calmly this time: 'You will do damage control first. If James finds the yearlings - they can't know of our involvement. Even if he's still on his own right now, he could be recruited in the future.'

"The second voice added, 'We're leaving. You'll be on your own with the tracker if you insist on staying with the girl.'

"'Fine.' Nick answered. 'I'll get rid of him and meet with the yearlings tomorrow as planned. I can take care of them then.'

"The first voice again: 'No. You will take care of them now. He could discover them before tomorrow.'

"Then the second voice: 'You will come with us and remove evidence of our involvement. She'll be fine for five minutes.'

"You hear a exasperated sigh. You think it was probably Nick. You keep listening, but you don't hear anything else. You wonder if they're leaving and listen for a door to open, but there are no sounds in the house. You want to go look out the window but you're too scared to move. You're pretty sure they're gone. You briefly consider trying to escape, but you have no idea where you are, and you know the one called James is out there hunting for you, and Nick would not be pleased if you were gone when he returned. And you know that he would somehow find you, regardless. The image of yourself with red eyes is still strong. You begin sobbing and wish you could wake up from this nightmare.

"Suddenly, you have the feeling you're being watched. You open one eye and see that Nick is standing in the middle of the room looking at you. He approaches you slowly, assuring you that you're going to be safe, and says he wants to talk to you. He takes your hands and pulls you to a sitting position, and then pulls a chair over from a desk and sits down facing you.

"You're staring at the floor, waiting for him to speak. You glance up at him, and you realize that for the first time since you've known him he seems uncertain about what to say to you.

"You decided to state the obvious: 'You're going to make me like you now, aren't you?'

"'Yes, the time has come,' he answered. 'But there are some things I want you to understand first. Perhaps it will make the transition easier for you. You already know more than the others did, anyway.'

"You weren't sure if he was still speaking to you or if he had started talking to himself. There were so many questions in your mind, but you asked, 'What others?'

"'That's not important right now,' he told you. 'We may not have much time. I need to prepare you for what's going to happen. Do you know what I am? What you're about to become?'

"You shook your head. You didn't have a name for what he was. You just knew that he had red eyes, that he was fast and strong, and that he could jump from great heights while holding you without hurting either of you.

"He took your hand as if to reassure you. 'Alice, I'm a vampire. Do you know what that is?'

"You gasped as you remembered overhearing some classmates in school talking about a novel they had read. 'Like Dracula?' you managed to choke out.

"Nick chuckled. 'Somewhat. Mr. Stoker didn't get many of the details right, but that's the basic idea.'

"You're struggling to remember what it was that you overheard being discussed about that book. 'You drink blood?' you asked him.

"'Yes.' He's staring at you, waiting for a reaction.

"'But you've never hurt me,' you tell him. You have the feeling that may be about to change, but you're confused as to why he spent so much time with you without harming you.

"'No. You are too special to become anyone's lunch.'

"'That's what James wants? He wants me for lunch?' You remembered the word he used to describe how you smelled – 'delectable'.

"'You don't need to worry about him. He will lose interest when he finds he can't have your blood.'

"'Because you're going to make me like you?'

"'That's right. You won't smell so appealing to him anymore, and you'll be stronger than him, too.'

"'How are you going to do that? You're going to force me to drink your blood?' The thought made you feel sick; you were certain you would throw up if you had to drink blood. That had to be the most disgusting part of what you had heard your classmates talking about.

"Nick chuckled again. 'He got that part backwards. It's the other way around, actually. I have to bite you without draining you. Not as easy as it sounds, but don't worry, I've done it before. I won't take too much. And I won't lie to you; the transformation is quite painful. But when you awaken, you will be strong and immortal. And James will not be able to have you for lunch.'

"You're not finding any of this information very comforting. You're thinking that maybe you would be better off if Nick would listen to his friends and just let James finish you off. You didn't want to be like Nick, but you knew it was going to happen anyway. You started sobbing again. 'I don't want to drink blood! I don't want to hurt people! What will happen if I refuse? Will I starve to death?'

"'Oh, you'll want blood,' he assured you, smiling. 'But you don't have to kill humans. You can drink from animals instead.'

"'Is that what you do?' you asked. 'You survive on animals?'

"He shook his head. 'I've never tried it, but I've heard it can be done. Animals don't smell as good…but you may like them. I want you to try to remember, when you awaken, that you don't want to hurt humans, okay? That may help. Your human memories will fade, but you can concentrate on remembering what is important to you.'

"You can hardly believe that this is really happening. You're sitting here having a conversation with a vampire who has said he is going to bite you; you're about to become a vampire. You're still not completely sure what that means, and you feel like you're running out of time to ask questions. You want to trust Nick; he has been your only friend since you were left at the asylum – he's been the only one who still listened to you. But he said it would be painful, and you would want to drink blood. This is not something you want. You think back to the woman you saw him kill a few hours earlier – how can you trust someone who just committed murder, someone who just admitted to drinking human blood when he knew he could survive on animals? You feel confused and hopeless. You start crying harder and more hysterically.

"'There, there, Alice. Everything's going to be okay. I'm going to take care of you.'

"'But you… You killed that woman. I saw you kill her. Why? Why did you do that? Are you going to go back and drink her blood?'

"Nick laughed. 'No, I'm not going back for her. Cold blood is revolting. I'm sorry you had to witness that, though. I didn't want you to be frightened, but I had to adjust some records and I couldn't have any witnesses. I made sure her death was quick and painless; I was quite merciful, really. She would have died eventually anyway. But you don't need to be concerned about that. I have to change you before our unwanted company arrives. I tried to leave things so that he would think I was still keeping you in the asylum, but I'm not sure how much time that will buy us. Is there anything else you wanted to ask before we begin?'

"You shook your head. 'I just don't think I want this. Can't you just kill me instead?'

"'No. Alice, I've told you, you're too special. Everything's going to be okay, my dear. I'll stay here with you through your transformation, and I'll help guide you when you awaken. I'll teach you how to sustain yourself, how to protect yourself. Once you're fully trained you may go off on your own, and you'll be free do to whatever you want.'

"Your panic level is escalating even further. 'You're going to leave me then?' you asked. As scared as you were of Nick, the idea that he might abandon you after you became like him scared you even more.

"'Not until you're ready. I promise,' he assured you. 'Eventually, you'll meet others like you, others who share your respect for humanity. You won't want to stay with me.'

"He spoke with such confidence that suddenly you wondered if he had some odd ability to know the future like you did. 'Can you see the future?' you asked him.

"'Not like you,' he answered, smiling. 'But I can still shape it.'

"It was the first time he had spoken to you of your unusual ability. You wondered how he knew. You felt a sharp sting of pain at your neck, and realized Nick had started the process. He had moved too quickly for you to see, and he now had his mouth at your neck. You had expected it to hurt more. You start to think that maybe it wouldn't be too bad; the shock treatments you received a couple of nights prior had been worse than this. Then the burning started. You resolved not to scream. Whenever you had screamed when you were shocked, the next shock would be worse; maybe this would be the same – screaming might make it worse. You tried to focus on Nick. He had moved to your ankle, and you could feel the burning beginning in your wrists and ankles. The burning is spreading. You can't focus on Nick any longer because you've closed your eyes and you're not sure where he is. You listen to the sounds outside in the forest, trying to focus on anything but the pain. The next fifty hours appear to be more of the same…I'm going to skip ahead…

"You hear voices and realize James has arrived. You strain to listen through the fog of the agonizing pain, and you hear James say, 'Well, well. You're a little sharper than I gave you credit for. Very odd, though, how she lies there so quietly. The poor thing doesn't seem to mind the pain. Such a waste… She did smell so delicious…'

"You hear Nick respond, 'I told you, she's mine. I'm sorry to disappoint you, but there's nothing here for you. You might have better luck back at the asylum.'

"'Ah, but this one's special, isn't she?' You could hear James's voice moving as he walked around you, and you felt something brush against your cheek. 'She is to be your mate?'

"'My plans for her are not your concern.'

"James laughed, sounding amused. 'No, I'm not too concerned about your plans. My prey may have escaped me for once - but not without a price.'

"You heard a loud crash, followed by growls and hisses and some more crashes. Then you had a series of visions. Your eyes were still closed, but you saw the fight play out clearly in your mind. You 'watched' as James attacked Nick, and Nick struggled to retaliate. You could see yourself lying motionless on a bed in the background. Nick lost an arm, and then the other arm. He had made a valiant effort, but he was no match for James. As you heard the sounds of the second limb being torn off and Nick's agonizing scream of pain, you had a vision of Nick staring at you with such intensity that you wondered if he was trying to bore a hole through you with his gaze. Then you saw James lunging at him from behind. The vision ended and you heard a horrible screeching sound. And that's the end of the memories associated with your human index."

A/N: What do you think Nick was up to? Who were the others Alice heard speaking? Why was Nick staring at Alice so intently there at the end? What did you think of Alice's last human days? I'd love to hear your thoughts. :)