Confessions

:KAI:

Let me tell you something. I hate clingy girls—HATE it! That's the whole reason I dated the way I did back then; didn't want to be tied down. And I'm still not, Allie's very independent—mostly a loner such as myself. That's one reason we're pretty compatible. She also doesn't go all paranoid on me when I chill with the guys every now and then.

I give her the same treatment—I don't cling onto her like my life depends on it and I don't care what she does as long as she's not with some guy, alone…

Yet, here I am, drowning myself in alcohol because I'm pretty damn sure she's out there, somewhere, with Mika. They both went missing about the same exact time. Allie's car isn't around and she won't pick up her phone.

I know it's jumping the gun but come on! She said it herself; she likes guys like Mika! So the most logical theory as to their disappearance is that they're together…alone. And she's no virgin! She's a freaking sex addict! How the Hell am I to know if she's not out there screwing him?!

"Dude man…slow down you're gonna feel that in the morning."

I gave Tala a bored look, the bottle of Bourbon Whisky hovering close to my lips. "So?"

Tala raises a brow before shaking his head, I return to chugging down the beverage.

"Shit man, you're terrible. All this for a girl?! You've got it bad."

I snorted, "What are you talking about? I'm not drinking cause I think my girlfriend is out there cheating on me with my cousin, Hell no! I'm drinking cause I want to drink." I say emptying the bottle of the liquid. I was over at Tala's cause one—he has a whole stash of alcohol ranging from basically everything—and two—his parents aren't home.

"Bullshit."

I reach out for the liquor labeled Hipnotiq, opening it and chugging the contents down.

"Stop it man!" Tala exclaims, swiping the alcohol away. I glare at him, "What the Hell?! I was drinking!"

Tala gives me a disgusted look, "Drinking?! Drinking?! That's not drinking! You're pathetic Kai. What the heck happened to you? You're even more worst than you were when you and Julia dated!"

I ran a hand through my hair, "Really?" I asked turning towards him. He nods his head. I let out a sigh burying my face in my hands.

"I don't know Tala. I just…I don't know how to explain it. It's just…" I trail off, not knowing how to finish my sentence.

"…that you're in love with the damn girl."

I turn sharply towards Tala, narrowing my eyes as he takes a sip from his wine glass—Sangria I believe. "I am not in love with her."

Tala snorts, "Keep telling yourself that."

I scoffed, "Please, if I was in love with her I would know."

Tala lets out an amused chuckle before grabbing the bottle of Vodka and pouring some of it into his wine glass, "Right, and I'm hiding in the closet."

I give him a bemused look, "That's not funny man."

"Exactly. So stop bullshitting yourself and admit that you're in love with the girl so you can stop trying to kill yourself by drowning in alcohol!"

I purse my lips, "You have no idea what you're talking about—"

"I know exactly what I'm talking about." Tala states, slamming his glass down and turning towards me, his normally icy blue eyes burning. "Look man, I love ya—in brotherly way—and I've got your back a million-and-one percent but you're starting to get on my nerves. And that's saying something since you never really do—"

"Jeez, don't I feel love" I muttered out sarcastically, cutting him off while reaching for the liquor he knocked out of my hand.

"Will you just shut up and hear me out?!"

I let out a sigh and turn to fully face him, my face hard. Tala lets out a frustrated growl.

"You're such a fucking pansy! Grow some balls or better yet a brain! Lord knows you lost it a while back! Your stupid game of denial is getting tiresome. Everyone is sick of it! Just go up to Allie and flat out tell her! It's not that hard! Even a freaking rock could do it if it was alive!"

I blinked in amusement, "A rock?" I asked. Tala's brow twitched, "Yes, a rock. Now get out of my house and find your girl!" He pointed towards the door. I glanced at the direction he was pointing, thinking for sometime.

"Do you really think I'm…"

"YES!" Tala exclaimed in irritation. I bit my inner cheek.

----------

:TALA:

I stared at my best friend who was also my rival since we both realized that girls are girls. There he was just sitting there like an idiot.

My best friend stooping as low as to drowning himself in alcohol over a girl he's barely dating! They're barely past two months! Yet here he is, killing himself because he's a dumbass who's too caught up in himself that he barely acknowledges the fact that he loves the girl!

I shake my head in annoyance, grabbing the liquor he was previously drinking and pouring it into my empty wine glass when I hear him chuckle.

I glance at him, his body slightly convulsing; his face in his hands. I raised a brow, "Hey man…you alright?" I ask, trying to sneak a peek at his face. When he doesn't answer I shrug, slowly bringing the drink towards my lips.

"Hahahahahahaha"

I turn towards Kai, surprise written all over my face. My mouth slightly hangs open as I witness one of his rare moments. I glance down at the drink and towards Kai who's still laughing manically.

"Uh…Kai?"

His laughter slowly dies down into random chuckling moments. I place the glass down, deciding that maybe I shouldn't drink it.

"Hey, you all right?"

Kai smirks at nothing in particular. Okay, I've come to the conclusion that the alcohol has messed up his brain and he is now in a dysfunctional state.

"Kai? Maybe you should lie down…" I suggest, slowly extending a pale hand towards him.

"I can't believe I didn't notice…" He mumbles to no one in particular.

"What?" I ask, feeling slightly nervous for his state of mind.

Kai turns towards me, a weird glint in his eyes, "How did I miss it? How was it that it was so obvious to everyone but me?!"

I back away a bit, "Uh…I don't know man…"

Kai shakes his head, chuckling a bit. Yup, he's definitely lost it.

"But how? I'm only eighteen! I'm about to graduate high school! I have a whole freaking life ahead of me, but here I am…" He trails off, a glaze look coming onto his face.

"Yeah, here you are…what the Hell are you talking about?!" I finally ask. Kai remains silent for a while before his face breaks into a smile.

"Shit Tala…I think I'm in love. Fuck…how the Hell did that happen?" He asked turning towards me, a bewildered look on his face. I blinked, letting out a chuckle, "So you finally admit it?"

Kai chuckles again nodding his head in the process, "Yeah…Shit…I'm in love…and with a fucking psycho!" He runs a hand down his face. I stare at him for sometime as he scrunches his eyes up in a thought process.

Suddenly, his face falls.

"What man?!" I asked, concerned for the change of emotion—man, this is like the most emotion he's shown since I've known him.

He gives me a pained look, "What if she doesn't feel the same? Of course she doesn't feel the same! She's out there with Mika!" He exclaims running a frustrated hand through his hair.

"You don't know that Kai."

He sets a glare on me, "Oh really? So it's just coincidence that my cousin and girlfriend vanish at the exact same time?!"

I let out a sigh, "Look, if you're so worried why don't you go back home? It's almost time for that "family" dinner thing at your house; Allie should be home by now. Ask her."

Kai snorts, "Like she'd tell me."

I gave him a blank look, "This is Ag we're talking about. She's a very blunt person. She'll tell you."

"Hn"

…

"You coming over for dinner?" Kai asks after the momentary pause

I snort, "Nope! My gut's telling me it's going to be pretty tense at your place tonight. I'm gonna chill at Rei's place."

"You sure? Mom's making Russian Baked Apple Cheesecake"

I pause, crap… I like Baked Apple Cheesecake.

"Nah…"

"What? But you like my mom's cheesecake."

I sigh, "I know, but I'm sticking with my gut instinct."

"Whatever man…it's gonna be good…"

…

"Can you save me a slice?"

:KAI:

I arrived back home, grabbing my cologne and spraying some on me to drown the smell of alcohol. I turn towards the Gale household to see Allie's car parked out front. I rub the back of my neck before heading out and into my house.

The smell of mom's home cooking entered my nostrils, man I could never get tired of this. I walked towards the kitchen to see Mika setting the table. I glared at his back. He must have felt it since he turned raising a brow followed by, "What?"

I sneered, "Where have you been Mika?"

Mika smirked, "Wouldn't you like to know."

I frowned deeply, glaring daggers at him.

"Settle down you two." My mother sent me a look that read 'play nice'. I rolled my eyes.

"Kai honey? Would you be a dear and grab Allie? She's still at home."

I let out a sigh.

"If you don't want to do it Kai, I can."

I growled at Mika, clenching my fists. He gave me an amused smirk. "No, I'll do it." I bit out.

Mika shrugged, placing the last plate down before grabbing the dining utensils. I sent one more glare his way before heading towards Allie's house.

Once I got there I rang the doorbell. It was a few minutes before I heard footsteps followed by the opening of the door.

I raised a brow as Allie gave me a blank stare before shutting the door in my face. I blinked a few times before stumbling out of my stupor. I banged on the door, anger boiling in my veins.

"Open the door Allie!"

"No!"

I let out an audible growl, "What? Disappointed that it wasn't my cousin?!" I spat out. I heard the lock turn before the door opened again, Allie staring at me in a confused manner.

"What? What does Mika have anything to do with this?"

I snorted, crossing my arms, "I don't know, maybe because you were out the whole time with him? Was he a good a fuck?"

Allie pursed her lips, "What?" She asked, anger evident in her tone. I glared at her, "You heard me."

The next thing I know a searing pain from my cheek burned me. I turned back towards Allie, placing a hand on the red handprint, trying to soothe the pain.

"How dare you" Allie growled out.

I sneered at her, "Oh please! I already know so you can drop the act Ag."

"What is your problem?!"

I glared at her, "We both know you like Mika, you said so yourself this morning! And then you vanish at the exact time Mika vanishes as well!"

Allie scoffs, "Haven't you heard of coincidence?"

"Ha! As if that was a coincidence. What? I wasn't enough to satisfy your needs, you had to go for my cousin too?"

"That's it! You are so dead Kai Hiwatari!"

The next thing I know, I'm on the ground, struggling against Allie who has her arms outstretched trying to grab my neck to choke me.

"Take that back you bastard!" She screams.

I struggled against her, my clothes staining with dirt. I pushed her off me and towards the ground. I pushed myself onto her to lessen her struggle. I had to push my face away because she tried to bite it.

"Get off!"

"Make me"

"I'll scream rape!"

"It's only rape if you don't enjoy it" I growled, a carnal feeling erupting within me. I felt the need to hurt her.

"Get off! You're a freaking whale, you're crushing me!"

I watched her struggle a bit more, my grip on her wrists tightening.

"Kai! Stop being such an ass and get off!"

I jumped off her, glaring at her as she laid on the dirt floor glaring up at me. I didn't even bother to help her up. I turned away, starting to make my way over back to my place.

"My mom told me to fetch you." And I left.

-----

:ALLIE:

My brow twitched, fetch me? FETCH me?! What am I?! A dog?! Argh! And what the heck was the whole 'screwing my cousin thing' huh?! I did no such thing! I wasn't even with Mika! Gah!

I narrowed my eyes as Kai's figure disappeared behind the door, fine. Two can play at that game. I smirked evilly before making my way towards the Hiwatari's…Kai is so dead.

-----

:KAI:

I continued stabbing my steak and viciously shoving it in my mouth while glaring heatedly at the pair across from me, whispering and giggling at each other. She didn't even deny that she wasn't with him! What the heck?! Allie's MY girlfriend.

Okay, so I'm a jealous guy but that's only because I'm the first guy she actually liked! I practically opened the door for her to test out the waters! And then there is also the obvious fact that I have acknowledged… I'M IN LOVE WITH HER! Like actually in love with her! It shouldn't have happened, it's not even supposed to happen! But it did! And here she is flirting with MY good-for-nothing-twig-like-cousin!

I felt a nudge on my right I grudgingly turned to find Uncle Nick staring at me.

"What?" I asked a bitterly. Nick let out a sigh and leaned forward, "You know, you're only adding more fuel by glaring at them like that. If you ignore them they'll stop."

I pursed my lips, "Hn" and glared at my half eaten steak.

-----

:ALLIE:

I smirked in satisfactory as Kai continued to stab murderously at his food. Serves him right. How dare he accuse me of cheating with his cousin! If he thinks that way then I'll make it seem that way. Payback is a bitch, especially when I'm involved.

Mika nudged me and I leaned towards him, glancing his way.

"So, are we done pissing my cousin off?"

I smiled slightly, "No way, this is only the beginning." I whispered. Mike chuckled, "Sheesh, what'd he do to get on the devil's side of you?"

I sneered, "Let's just say, he's got some trust issues."

Mika rolled his eyes, "He must like you a lot if it's gotten that bad."

I raised a brow. Mika gave me a blank look, "My cousin's like a manwhore. If you're able to rile him like that there's got to be more than just 'dating' you know?"

I snorted, "As if…" I mumbled, returning to eating my meal. I glanced up when I felt eyes but quickly glanced down, a blush coming on my cheeks. Nick was the one staring…well, more like giving me a disapproving look. Hey! It's not my fault! Kai's the one who started it!

:KAI:

I irritatingly pushed the buttons on the remote, not really focusing on what was flashing before me. Allie had vanished upstairs with Mika—big surprised there—while the adults chatted in the kitchen. I felt a weight on the sofa seat next to me. I glanced at my father before returning to changing the channels every two seconds.

"What happened?" He asked in a bored tone.

"Hn" I replied.

"Don't 'hn' me son, what did you do?"

I dropped the remote and turned to him, glaring, "Me?! I didn't do anything, she's the one who's cheating on me with Mika!"

Father raised a brow, "Oh really? And you know this how?"

I stared at him like he was the densest person on the planet before extending an arm towards the stairs, "She just went upstairs with him! What proof do I need?!"

Father stared at me evenly, "Kai…" He started in that scolding manner, "Don't you think you're jumping the gun too fast? Maybe you should just calm down and talk it out with her. You two were doing just fine this morning—"

"Yeah, right before Mika showed his ugly face" I mumbled, glaring at the top of the stairs where the pair was doing who knows what.

"Why don't you go upstairs and have a talk with them."

"Hell no" I replied, monotonously

"Kai"

I let out sigh, "Fine…but I'm telling you she's cheating on me."

My dad just rolled his eyes as I made my way towards the guest room that Mika was borrowing.

I stood outside the door, deciding whether to barge in or knock. I decided the former because frankly I didn't feel like being the gentleman.

"Dude! Can't you knock? What if we were doing something inappropriate?"

I glared at Mika before turning towards Allie who stared at me as if she was expecting me the whole time.

"Can we talk?"

"I think so, you're capable of language and I am too" She stated with a fake smile. I sneered at her, "I mean privately?"

She stared at me for sometime before rolling off the bed in a very ungraceful manner. She walked towards me, her eyes staring evenly at me. She turned towards Mika, "See ya later babes."

"For sure" Mika replied a smirk grazing his lips. I scoffed in disgust before walking out, Allie following behind me.

I led her downstairs and out the back, ignoring the stares from the adults. Once outside I took a deep breath before turning towards her, only to be met with the palm of her hand once more.

"Ouch! What the heck is wrong with you?!" I growled, rubbing the sore spot once more.

"That…was for being such a prune!"

I just stared at her, "What?"

"What is your problem?! You've been so…so…so…mean!"

"I've been mean?! You're the one cheating on me with Mika!"

I dodged a kick to the groin, "There you go again! What makes you think I'm cheating on you?!"

"You said it yourself, you like Mika!"

"So?! That doesn't automatically mean I'm gonna cheat on you!"

We were already an inch away from each other. I stared at her, her face flushed crimson from her anger while her eyes danced with a raging inferno. God I love it when she's angry, it makes me want to throw her down and just have my way with her.

"I have to tell you something" I whispered. She raised a brow, "Oh? What is it?"

I swallowed a lump in my throat. "I…" I trailed off, my face beginning to heat up. Get a grip Kai, it's not that hard!

"You what?" She asked in an irritated manner, taking a step back as she folded her arms across her chest.

…

I couldn't respond for sometime, I just stared at her, "I…you're not cheating on me are you?" I asked, mentally slapping myself for such a lame excuse to stall time.

Allie rolled her eyes, "Of course not stupid!"

"Then where'd you go?" I asked. She gave me a deadpanned look, "I went over to Hilary's to get our Calculus homework done."

I raised a brow, "Oh really? Then why didn't you just come over to my place? I have Calc with you."

I watched as Allie's face turned red, "Well…it's because…"

"Because what?" I cut her off.

She glared at me, her fist clenching and unclenching, "Because…you're freaking distracting!"

I blinked, "What?"

"And it doesn't help I have new disorder…" She stated. I snorted, realizing what she meant, "Oh please Ag, I have more self control then you know."

"So?! That makes one of us! Remember? I'm now a sex addict!" She scolded, placing her hands on her hips. I shook my head, taking a step towards her while reaching my arms out towards her. She walked towards me allowing me to encircle my arms around her waist. She in turn wrapped her arms around my neck.

"True…then what was with the flirting at the table?"

She rolled her eyes, "It's called revenge."

I placed my forehead on hers, "Revenge?"

"Yes, for accusing me of having a secret love affair with your cousin whom I barely met a little more than a few hours ago."

I shrugged, "Hn"

I closed my eyes, enjoying the feeling of her fingers twirling themselves in my hair.

"I love you…" I whispered, suddenly opening my eyes when the twirling stopped. I stared at her as she stared wide-eyed at me. An awkward silence loomed between us before, "Excuse me?"

I blinked, "What?" I asked in turn.

"Repeat what you said."

"What?" I repeated, playing stupid. She narrowed her eyes, "No, before that."

"I didn't say anything."

"Yes you did you said that you lo—yeah…" She pursed her lips.

"What?" I asked, small smile playing on my lips. She glared at me before playfully hitting my shoulder, "Kai!" She complained.

I rolled my eyes, "I have no idea what you are saying."

She huffed before placing her head on my chest. A calm silence was exchanged.

"Did you mean it?" She asked quietly, so quiet that I barely heard her. I stayed silent, my grip tightening.

"Yes"

I felt her tense in my arms before she pushed herself away from me to get a look at my face, but I couldn't look at her, I glanced away.

"Kai…look at me…" She asked more than she commanded. I glanced at her before slowly turning to face her.

"Did you really mean it…or are you messing with me?"

I ran a hand through my hair, "Ag, do we really have to discuss this?"

"Yes! You just said this morning that you didn't like me that way, that it was just a 'high school' thing! Now you go and say…that…what am I supposed to think?!"

"Think whatever you want!"

"Ugh! You are so frustrating that I could just beat you up!"

I snorted, "Oh please, I'd like to see you try."

Allie gave me a determined look, "Don't tempt me."

I chuckled before burying my face in the crook of her neck, "I think I love you…"

"Oh, now you think you do."

"Ag…" I groaned, "Not now…I'm tired of fighting with you."

"You're the one who starts it."

"Hn"

"Ha! You didn't deny it!"

"Shut up Gale"

"I still think your cousin's hot"

I glared at her, she gave me a sheepish smile, "What?! It's true! But if I wasn't in love with you I'd totally kick you out on the curb—oops!" She covered her mouth, staring at me with the 'deer-caught-in-the-headlights' look.

"You didn't hear that…" She mumbled through her hand. I smirked, "Actually Ag, I did…"

She shook her head, "No, no you didn't" She continued mumbling in her hand. I rolled my eyes, removing her hand from her mouth. I leaned forward, "So, what was it again about being so in love with me?"

She narrowed her eyes, "Ha! In love with you?! Who in their right mind would be in love with you?!"

I chuckled, "No one…" I started, earning a questioning brow, "But since you're never in your right mind you'd be in love with me."

Allie's face contorted into an angry one before returning to calm yet blank expression, "Then you must be out of your mind if you claim to 'think you love me'"

I shrugged my shoulders, "That or it must be the alcohol working—ow!" I gasped as she stepped on my foot—more like stomped on it. "I was kidding Ag! Jeez"

"Stupid" She muttered.

"Like I said, it could be the alco—kidding!"

It remained silent for a while, I don't know how long but it was quiet…the peaceful quiet.

"You really mean it?" Allie asked again, pushing herself away from me once more. I let out an agitated growl before replying, "Yes Ag, I do! It took a lot of alcohol and a chat with my best friend to finally admit that I am fucking in love with you!"

Allie scrunched her nose, "Take out the 'f' word and say it again"

"No, I will not take out the 'f' word and say it again."

"Say it again!"

"No!"

"Please Kai?"

"Aishiteru"

"What?"

"I said it again"

"No you didn't it! You said the I-she-something!"

I rolled my eyes, "It means I love you in Japanese."

Allie suddenly narrowed her eyes, "You said that to me on my birthday…you prick!" She exclaimed pushing me away.

"What now?" I asked, getting very frustrated with the change in temperature she always manages to do.

"You liar! You're just toying with me! Well you know what?! I'm not a toy! If you're going to be like that we might as well break up right now!" She exclaimed glaring at me.

"What?" I asked before narrowing my own eyes, "Oh-ho! This is just your plan to break up with me so you can hook up with Mika!"

"Will you drop the Mika thing for ten seconds! He has nothing to do with this!" She started throwing punches in my direction. Sheesh, I have such a violent girlfriend. I caught her wrist, mid-punch.

"What do you want from me Ag?"

"I want the truth! Just the truth…" She spoke the latter softly.

"The truth?" I asked.

"Yes, the truth…"

I let out a breath, "The truth is…I am not playing with you. I really do think my feelings run deeper than I thought they did. I really do think I'm in love with you."

"Are you lying?"

"Ag, come on do you think I'd joke about something like this?"

She shrugged her shoulders. I rolled my eyes, "What does it matter anyway?"

She pulled her hand away from my grasp, "What does it matter? What do you mean what does it matter?! It matters a lot!"

I raised a brow.

"Gah! Forget it!"

"Ag!" I called out as she started to walk away.

:ALLIE:

What does it matter?! Is he insane?! It always matters. He doesn't understand! Argh! Why did I have to have such an unfeeling boyfriend?! Why not someone who has a heart?!

"Ag!" I hear him somewhat call out, but I quicken my pace.

"Go away Kai! I hate you!"

"You know you don't mean that"

Okay, so maybe I don't mean it, but it doesn't stop me from saying it. Kai finally caught up to me, grabbing me by the wrists and spinning me around to face him, our body's touching. I glared up at him as he stared blankly at me.

"You are the most frustrating person on the planet Ag."

I snorted, "Ha! You're no pain reliever yourself!"

Kai smirks, "Like they say: 'Birds of a feather flock together'"

"Oh really? Well this bird is about to fly away from you, now let go!"

His grip only tightens, "You do know our relationship isn't very healthy."

"Well sor-ry"

I began trying to yank my wrist out of his grip; I even attempted to slap him but he caught my other hand…now they're both caught in his strong grip.

"Let go Kai!"

"Not until we talk everything out."

"Talk what out?! We both know you're a liar!"

His crimson orbs flare up, giving him a dark look, "I. Was. Not. Lying."

"Yes you were!" I yelled; I struggled even more not wanting to let the tears fall in front of him. I will not cry for a jerk like him.

Kai's face softens a bit—almost looking as if he was concern, "Hey…are you crying?" He asks softly. I shake my head, turning my face away from him, "No!" I squeak out.

"Ag…"

I bit my lip as I felt the tears spilling.

"Look at me, don't cry"

He releases my wrists, cupping my face instead and turning it towards him. I divert my eyes to the side, staring at the grass.

"Allie…" He continues to whisper, "Look at me…"

I shake my head.

"Please?"

I turn, my lips pursed. Kai stares at me, using his thumb to wipe the tearstains.

"Why are you crying?"

I glare at him, but it falters until I just break down. The whole weight of everything that I ever felt for him crashing down on me. I leaned into him, wanting him to just hold me. My sobs become audible; I felt Kai's hands on my shoulders as I continued weeping.

"I hate you!" I cry out, "You're the biggest ass-wipe on the planet! You don't care about anything! And it's so stupid! So stupid! So…stupid…because…no matter what…I still feel the way I do…I still…" I close my eyes, gripping his shirt, "…I still…I still…I still love you…and it's so stupid! So stupid…"

"…I guess…that makes the two of us…"

CC: FINALLY right?! I was going to extend their denial a bit longer but I changed my mind...but I also had to throw out the awesome idea I had XD But it's all good! I even extended it to make up for how long I took :D

So yeah...I'm not really sure if I like this chapter...I rewrote it about three times, deleting the previous version each time until I gave up and stuck with this one...hmmm...I'll leave it up to guys to decide how this chapter faired. If you're with me on this one I hope the next chapter will be more well written but if you liked it I still hope the next chapter will be more well written :)

Another thing...for those of you who read 'That Girl'...I'm having a MAJOR problem with the upcoming chapter...I started writing it a while back but...eh...I didn't like it so I deleted the whole thing...and now I'm stuck with nothing but the white page and the blinking bar thing that words appear from XD So if you have ANY ideas...please PM them to me!!! I could use some sparks to get the fire going you know?

But anyways...thanks to...

LostAngel217

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And of course to the rest of the readers out there!!!!