The feast seemed to last for hours, but Hermione barely ate anything. She could feel the grey eyes watching every action she made from across the other side of the hall; it took everything she had not to look back. For the first time the food tasted bland and she couldn't stand to eat most of it.
As usual, eventually the conversation turned to Quidditch and Hermione took the opportunity to think about what Draco had said to her. When she entered the Great Hall she had scanned the teachers table. To her relief Professor McGonagall was still there, but the Carrow twins were not. Maybe he had been lying to her - but why bother? She became aware of the cold metal ring against her neck.
"Are you going back to the Gryffindor Common Room?" Hermione asked when the meal ended.
"Yeah..." Ginny hesitated then added "Do you want to come?"
"If it's okay?" Hermione replied uncertainly.
"Of course it is," Ginny told her with a smile.
The Common Room was quite full, but everyone was in high spirits after the holidays. Hermione was greeted with questions about her Christmas and 'Happy New Years' which she replied heartily. The sheer amount of people managed to distract her from everything outside the warm, cosy room. It was good to be surrounded by familiar faces and laughter and fun again. Ron and Ginny were sat around a small table, surrounded by a small crowd as the siblings played Wizard's chess. Hermione knew how competitive Ginny was, but Ron never lost Wizard chess and he obviously wasn't losing now. Hermione could practically see steam coming out of Ginny's ears.
It wasn't until people started to trickle away - making their way to bed, that Hermione began to feel a sense of denial and naivety that had surrounded the Gryffindors. As people started to disappear, Hermione realised how wrong it all felt. How wrong it felt that they were all having a good time, and there were people out there dying.
Harry walked over to where Hermione was curled up on one of the sofas in front of the huge fireplace.
"It was nice to have you back here Hermione,"
"It felt good - I feel as though I've been getting further and further away from everything, and tonight just reminded me of how much everyone at this school means to me. Especially you guys,"
"Yeah - I guess it's much more lively in here than in the Head's dormitory," he joked.
Hermione smiled, but she couldn't hold it in any longer.
"Harry, you know this can't last," But he just looked at her with confusion.
"This..." She said gesturing round the room "This isn't what happens during a war. I know it seems as though Hogwarts creates a barrier between us and the real world, but most of the kids in this room...who knows where they'll be in a year's time? Who knows if they'll even be a Hogwarts to come back to next September?"
"Hermione where is this all coming from?" Harry asked - she could hear the frustration in his voice.
"You have to stop acting like this," She replied.
"Like what?"
"Like Voldemort isn't using every minute of every day to try to kill you!"
Out of the corner of her eye Hermione saw Ron and Ginny stand up.
"What do you want me to do? Do you want me to never have any fun? Do you want me to sit here in constant contact with the Order, because-"
"Screw the Order," She said.
"Hermione - what the hell is going on? You've been distant all year, then ever since the Christmas Ball you've just been out of it. Now you're saying stuff like this. I'm trying my hardest here, but do you want me to be completely honest with you? I haven't got a bloody clue what I'm doing. So why don't you tell me? Tell me what I'm supposed to do!"
The words jolted through Hermione's memory. Tell me what I was supposed to do.
Her chest opened up again as she felt the emptiness returning. It's do what He tells you - or die. I had no choice.
Harry got up and left, with Ron trailing behind him, but Hermione didn't notice.
I tried so hard to be the person you wanted me to be.
That's what Draco had said to her. She had shut it out. Forgotten everything he had said that night, but now it all came flooding back, as though an invisible wall had fallen down. One night. That was all Hermione wanted - one night to forget everything about him. But she couldn't; not the way he smiled at her, or the way he held her, or those damn perfect eyes.
Behind her, Ginny tentatively reached forward, but Hermione when began to shake as she started crying, Ginny left silently.
/
Ginny wasn't able to sleep. She couldn't get the picture of Hermione sat on that sofa crying out of her mind. She had seen the change right in front of her eyes. She had seen the wild grin on Hermione's face every morning at Breakfast throughout the first few months of term. Ginny had seen it transform over Christmas - she had seen the way Hermione changed the way she did everything. She barely ate, she barely spoke. Even tonight she had seen the facade fall down and an empty look replace the happiness in Hermione's eyes. But no-one else seemed to have noticed. Everyone could tell that something was wrong - but Ginny was the only one who recognised it. She was the only one who knew what was going on. She had seen that hollow, empty look before - in the mirror.
/
Hermione was still sat in front of the fire. She hadn't moved since everyone had left. The Common Room was empty now, and the silence Hermione didn't realise she craved surrounded her like a blanket. She stared at the embers in the fireplace - she had no idea how long she had been sat there. She just couldn't bear to move - there was only one place she could go, and she just couldn't bear it. So she had decided that staying here all night was as good as anywhere.
She pulled the necklace out from under her robes and looked at it again. She still had no idea what the inscription meant- but if she wanted to know, that would mean having to ask Draco. Holding the ring in her hand, it seemed to pulse with life, as though an electric energy ran through it.
"Hey," A voice broke through the silence. Hermione let go of the ring and turned round to see Ginny stood behind the sofa, holding two mugs.
"Can I join you?" She asked and Hermione nodded in reply.
Ginny looked at the necklace as she sat down, but didn't ask to Hermione's relief.
"Here - its cocoa," She passed her one of the cups.
"You know, I agree with what you said to Harry," Ginny said.
"You did?" Hermione was surprised.
"Yeah. It just all seems like one big game at the moment. None of us are really focusing on what we should," Then she added "Including you,"
Hermione opened her mouth to protest, but a pointed look from Ginny stopped her.
"You can tell me Hermione - I'm not stupid. I recognise this - and it's not illness. It's heartbreak,"
Hermione hesitated, but she could feel the truth building up inside her...and eventually she gave in. It took longer than she thought to get through everything. She told Ginny how it all started, how she never asked Draco about Voldemort. She told her about how they spent more and more time together. Finally she told Ginny everything that happened on the night of the Christmas Ball. After she was done, Hermione waited. For a few minutes Ginny didn't say anything at all.
"I know it must sound crazy to you Gin, and against everything I stand for, but..."
"But you love him," She said quietly.
"What? I never said that I..." Hermione trailed off.
"You do though, I can tell by the way you talk about him. I never would have thought it though...Malfoy?"
"Yeah - I know, after everything it's ridiculous that he-"
"Not as ridiculous as Harry and Pansy though," Ginny stated.
Hermione was shocked "Harry and Pansy!" She almost shouted, and Ginny shushed her.
"According to Padma they're all over each other in Potions...I'm surprised you haven't noticed. Although Malfoy is in your class as well isn't he?" Ginny teased.
Hermione laughed, but after it faded, nothing was left "What do I do now?" She asked Ginny earnestly.
"I think you know," She replied.
/
Hermione left the Gryffindor Common Room, and was walking towards her dormitory when she suddenly stopped, realising there was somewhere she needed to go first.
She'd always found Hogwarts creepy at night - and the Library was no exception. Her wand gave out little light, and it took her a while to find the right book. She pulled it out and put it down on the table. She pulled a scrap of parchment from her robes and found a quill lying on one of the desks. One by one Hermione flicked to the three pages she needed and wrote the words down, with their translation underneath.
She looked at the ring again 'Amor Semper Vincet'
Then she looked down at the parchment to check she had it right.
'Love always prevails'
A/N: Feeling a bit stuck/uninspired lately; I really hope this chapter is up to all your expectations and you're still enjoying the story! Love hearing from you guys x