Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer. This story, though, belongs to me.
Chapter Twenty-Six: The New Yorker
"Where to, lady?" The taxi driver asked as he pulled away from the curb at the airport.
I rattled off the location of my Upper West Side apartment before settling against the seat, my eyes trained out the rain-soaked window as the city began to come into view. If there was one thing I had learned during my time as a New Yorker, it was that taxi drivers kept their mouths shut, preferring to do their job in silence. As I absorbed the city, glistening with moisture from the sprinkling rain, I was thankful that my driver wasn't an exception to the rule. My eyes felt heavy from the tears I had shed throughout the morning and, every now and then, I felt a prickling sensation, warning me that I was on the verge of another momentary breakdown.
As we sped through the streets, I was thankful for the clouds that had settled above the skyscrapers, the gloomy weather matching my mood. Halfway through the fight, my body simply ran out of tears to cry and I fell asleep against the window, drooling. The elderly woman in the seat next to me had woken me up as the plane taxied toward the gate, a pitying smile on her face as she shook my shoulder gently. She didn't ask any questions and didn't offer to share her own life story, but I could tell by the frown on her face that she knew the feeling, that the loneliness written all over my face was familiar to her. Somewhere, she probably had an Edward, a man she had walked away from, either for a short time, or a lifetime.
Soon, my neighborhood came into view, but I barely comprehended the fact, my mind too preoccupied with thoughts of Edward, wondering how he was spending his time in the airport, if he was in as miserable a mood as I was. As I daydreamed, I felt a tear trickle down my cheek. I pictured him, sitting alone, his head in a newspaper, or maybe a magazine, as he sat in an uncomfortable chair at his gate, watching as flight after flight boarded before it was finally his turn. My heart ached at the idea of him, sitting alone for hours before returning to an empty apartment in a city where he spent more time in the lab than out with friends.
Maybe I wasn't out of tears, after all.
Eventually, my driver pointedly cleared his throat to bring me back down to Earth before announcing our arrival. I paid him quickly, offering a small smile in his direction before declining his offer to help me with my bags. As I glanced at my building, dark brown and drenched with rain, I had to literally tell my feet to move, hoping that if I simply stayed in the taxi instead of reentering reality that three weeks would fly by and I would find myself in Edward's arms again.
It was still raining, but I couldn't find it within myself to care as I stepped onto the sidewalk, slowly pulling my suitcase behind me as I stepped up to the door. My face was already wet, so I figured I might as well invite the rest of my body to the pity party. At least if I was wet all over, it wouldn't draw attention to my drenched cheeks.
Stepping into my building, I wrung the water out of my hair, grabbing it all in one hand before twisting it over my shoulder. Grateful that there was no one I knew lingering in the lobby, I hurried towards the elevator, pressing my floor number and the door close button at the same time, eager to make it upstairs and collapse onto my bed without having to make small talk.
Of course, fate had other plans, and my certifiable roommate was lounging in the living room, evidently Hell bent on tormenting me. Couldn't she see I was having an epic moment of feeling sorry for myself? That a part of my heart was no longer with me, instead on its way to Chicago in the hands of Edward? I chided myself for answering her ad on Craigslist when I had moved to the city, desperate for a roommate that seemed at least somewhat sane. How I had made it through three years of her shenanigans, I wasn't sure.
"Well, hello, hot mess," Jessica commented as I swung the door open, dragging my bags behind me.
I simply glared at her, willing myself to have the power to shoot daggers from my eyes, before turning on my heel and taking the five short steps to my shoebox of a room. Moving slowly, I prayed that by some miracle, my room wouldn't be empty, but that Edward would be lounging on my bed, a grin on his face like our separation was a big, hilarious joke.
Swinging open my door, I held my breath, but my room was empty. Everything was in the exact place I had left it before catching my flight, before taking a trip had ended in love and a heartbreaking goodbye.
"Have a nice trip? Doesn't look like it," she snickered, her voice carrying through the apartment. "Did all the love remind you of what the normal population has? Honestly, Bella, it's no wonder you're alone. Why don't you just get a few cats to keep you company?"
At her words, I dropped my bags in the doorway and turned back around, my fists clinched against my side as anger boiled beneath my skin. "I had a great week, for your information."
An evil smirk played on her lips. "Riiiiight. I'm sure the world's biggest pencil sharpener is a ton of fun."
"You know what? I'm not even going to bother," I huffed, throwing my hands up in the air before whirling around to reenter my room, slamming the door loudly behind myself. It was true that I had rarely gone on dates, and even less frequently spent the night out, but at least I wasn't spreading my legs for half the city like she was.
What a slutmuffin.
Patting myself on the back for not stooping to her level of disgusting, I climbed over my bags gracefully before collapsing onto my bed face first, my arms and legs sprawled out like a starfish. Admittedly, I could have told her about Edward, about our days and nights together filled with laughter and new love, but I felt that she didn't deserve to know.
"I'm going out," I heard from the hallway. "I'll probably have Mike over later."
Instead of answering her with the string of profanities that were waiting on the tip of my tongue, I grabbed my pillow and yelled into it, the fluffiness muffling my cries. Of all days, today certainly was not the one that I wanted to hear noises coming from her bedroom. The walls in our apartment seemed to be, unfortunately, as thin as paper.
It wasn't bad enough that I was without Edward. Somehow, the universe had decided that I should also be subjected to Jessica and Mike's piss poor imitation of lovemaking. I swore if she called him 'Big Daddy' again, I was going to walk in there and throw cold water on them in the middle of their 'session.' With my eyes covered, of course.
The front door slammed and I rolled onto my back, staring at the ceiling as I folded my arms behind my head. It had been less than five hours, and the ache in my chest since saying goodbye to Edward hadn't decreased in the slightest. If anything, it had increased in size. Realizing that there was no way I would accomplish anything of worth until I met Angela for dinner, I sat up, peeled off my damp clothing, and set the alarm on my phone and laid down for a nap, grasping my shirt in my hands as if having the remnants of Edward's tears would bring him to me.
xXx
As a general rule, navigating New York in the rain is something that most residents of the city dread. Taxis are nearly impossible to come by, the subway terminals become ridiculously hot and crowded and, no matter how hard one tries, getting wet cannot be avoided. After waking up from my nap and pulling on a fresh pair of jeans and a tank top, though, I found myself making an exception to the rule. Instead of attempting to hale a taxi or hop on the subway, I grabbed my umbrella and decided to walk the five blocks to the deli where Angela and I had planned to meet. I knew that I needed some fresh air, a few minutes to clear my head before facing my friend, puffy eyed and frowning. Besides, I didn't want to tempt fate and get stuck with a chatty taxi driver or, worse, have to make small talk with a colleague on the subway.
The walk was short and as I pulled open the door to the deli, my head was just as foggy as it had been before leaving my apartment, still filled with longing for Edward. Wondering if the feeling of wanting to be constantly near him would ever go away, and secretly hoping that it wouldn't, I scanned the dining area quickly, finding Angela waiting in a small corner booth, her head stuck in a menu. I took a deep breath before approaching, willing myself to look happy despite the fact that I was breaking apart inside.
"Hi," I said as I approached, sliding into the booth and placing my umbrella at my feet.
Angela's eyebrows furrowed. "Did you…walk here?"
"Of course," I scoffed, as if I walked five blocks in the rain everyday.
"Okay…" Her voice was skeptical as she returned her attention to her menu. "How was the trip?" She asked without looking up. Good, more time to pull myself together.
I bit my lip, attempting to focus on my own menu to avoid another round of tears as sweet memories flooded my mind. "It was great," I managed, my voice miraculously void of sadness. So far, so good.
"Anything exciting to report?"
"Um…not really," I looked down, my fingers playing with the frayed edge of my menu.
"Bella," Angela prodded. "What do you mean…not really?"
I was biting my lower lip when I looked up, shrugging.
Angela scrutinized me with her eyes. "Your eyes are puffy and your nose is red. You've been crying," she stated.
I nodded pathetically, my lip still trapped between my teeth. I felt it quiver nervously.
"Also, there's something…different about you," she added, still examining. Suddenly, she gasped. "You met a guy, didn't you?"
I felt myself blushing as I continued nodding, apparently having gone mute from walking in the rain. Luckily, a waitress arrived to take our order, saving me from her questions for at least a moment. Unfortunately, I could practically see the wheels turning in her brain as I ordered a grilled chicken salad, the look on Angela's face eerily similar to the one that Alice donned when planning and plotting.
The waitress had taken a total of two steps away from the table before her attention returned to my recent revelation.
"Well," she began, "who was he?"
"His name is Edward," I offered, knowing that the lack of communication between us for the last three years would leave her guessing. Angela was vaguely familiar with the distinct personalities that belonged to Alice, Rose, Jasper, and Emmett, but I rarely, if ever, mentioned Edward.
"Uh huh. Home base?" She asked.
I giggled lightly, my mood lightening as we settled into the game that the two of us played after one of us met a new guy. "Chicago," I said, my frown returning quickly as I said the name of the city I now wanted to demolish with a second great fire for taking my man away.
"Bummer. Occupation?"
"He's in medical school." I hadn't thought to ask him, but I wondered how much longer he would be tied to Chicago, if his schoolwork was nearly completed and where he had considered applying for residencies.
"Nice," she grinned with approval. "Hair color? Eye color?"
I closed my eyes, images of his messy hair and piercing eyes appearing before my lids. "Brown, but more of a bronze, especially in the sun and green eyes, piercing green, with little flecks of gold here and there," I breathed as I slowly opened my eyes, having envisioned him so clearly that I almost expected him to be sitting next to Angela, a smirk playing on his beautiful face.
"Those are nice adjectives. Body?"
"There are no words," I sighed, feeling my cheeks heat as I recalled the delicious feel of his skin against my own.
"Damn, Bella, you're smitten."
If only you knew the extent of it.
In that moment, I chose not to divulge the depth of my relationship with Edward, fully aware that if I did, she would probably have a coronary just seconds before attempting to talk me down what she would assume was simply an 'I've finally been fucked' high. After my split with Jake, I had been so guarded, keeping my heart in a box with a key I held tightly in my grasp, refusing to give even a small piece to anyone. To fall in love, so suddenly and intensely, would seem so out of character that it would be literally unbelievable. As I got over saying goodbye to the man I had cared for so deeply in some capacity for the past seven years, I didn't have it in me to defend our love.
I shrugged, a small smile forcing its way onto my lips. "I guess I am, yeah."
"Are you going to see him again? I mean, was it a one time thing?"
"Definitely not," I responded quickly, my voice clipped at her suggestion that Edward was a simple wedding fling. Her eyebrows shot up in surprise and I realized that she had assumed I was answering her first question. "I mean, wait, no it definitely wasn't a one time thing."
"How many times was it?"
I cocked my head to the side, unsure of the exact number. The first night, and the shower, and…suddenly, my skin was burning for his touch.
"Oh my God, you slut!" Angela said, a joking tone in her voice as she reached across the table to punch me in the shoulder.
"He's coming to New York in three weeks," I offered in an attempt to change the topic.
"Interesting…"
"What do you mean?" I asked as the waitress arrived with our orders.
"I mean," she paused, pouring a generous amount of dressing across her salad. "It's just surprising. You go away for the week to be in the wedding of one of your college friends and, suddenly, you're head over heels for a guy?"
"Pretty much," I stated simply before stuffing my face with a forkful of salad. Don't say it, Bella, don't tell her that you're in love with him.
Angela chewed slowly, her eyes doing that thing where she scrutinized me again. "Did you know him before?"
"Before the wedding?" I asked, my mouth full of food.
"Uh huh."
"I did," I answered succinctly.
"And?"
"And, we were friends in college. It was no big deal."
"How good of friends?"
For some reason, the innocent question brought to mind a fresh memory, one from our college years that reminded me how close Edward and I had been, despite the fact that we were both in relationships with other people. Though Alice might have been my best friend, I realized that Edward was pretty damn close to the top of the list, even then.
xXx
Bella POV
March 2009, Junior Year
(425): You started crying because you didn't get to wear your rain boots this week so I turned on the shower and let you jump around in it.
(206): You're the best friend ever
"What are you doing tonight?" I asked Edward as we sat on the main quad. Somehow, our schedules had aligned so that we had a break together on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Dubbing it E/B time, we would find an open space in the grass and hang out, studying talking, people watching, or whatever else we wanted to do. E/B time had no rules, other than that it was supposed to be relaxed and drama free.
"I'm not sure," he answered from his position on his back, eyes closed as he soaked up the warm spring sun. "You?"
"Well, Alice and Jasper are going on a date, Emmett and Rose are going on a date, and Jake and I are…off again."
"Tanya made out with some random guy in a bar last night, so, we're off, too."
"Sorry."
"No worries." He sat up. "Wanna do something?"
"I have a fresh, not yet opened bottle of Vodka hidden in my room…"
"I'll bring the Jello," he offered, a smile spreading across his face before he fell back onto his back. "Strawberry, right?"
"So, then he told me that he hated you."
"And that's why you broke up with him?"
I nodded. "Yes, that's what I'm trying to tell you."
Edward and I were sitting in the middle of the living room at my apartment, empty plastic cups once filled with Jello shots scattered around us.
"Why does he hate me?"
"I have no idea, Edward," I sighed, more exasperated than I would normally be due to the alcohol.
"Is he…jealous?"
"What would he be jealous of?" I asked, genuinely curious.
Edward shrugged. "I don't know, maybe our friendship?"
"Like there's anything to be jealous of," I scoffed. "We drink together. We hang out together. Every now and then we share a bed, fully clothed of course. But, it's not like we're fuck buddies." I whispered the last word, as if it was scandalous and forbidden.
His eyes hooded. "Definitely not fuck buddies."
"So, see, he needs to chill out."
"If you say so."
"Edward?"
"No, I won't be your friend with benefits," he joked, winking.
I felt my body flush. "That's not what I was asking," I said, clearing my throat. "You know what?"
"What?"
"I got new rain boots this week, Alice made me buy them."
"Okay?" He shook his head back and forth in confusion.
"And," I paused dramatically, leaning forward on my hands and pouting. "I didn't get to wear them."
"That's a tragedy," he said sarcastically.
I glared at him. "Make it better, Eddie?"
"I will if you don't call me Eddie."
"Okay, Edward. I won't call you…um…that name."
He stood, a smirk on his lips, and extended his hand to help me up. I scrambled to my feet and he picked me up, bridal style, before carrying me towards my bedroom.
"No fuck buddies, didn't we just agree on that?"
"Damn, you're wasted Swan."
"I love Vodka," I sang. "Where are you taking me, E?"
"Where are you rain boots?" He asked, ignoring my question as we entered my room, fumbling around for a light switch, almost as wasted as I was.
"Closet."
"Ah, of course." He sat me on the bed before rummaging through my closet. "Got enough clothes?"
"I live with Alice."
"Right," he nodded. "Okay, are these them?" He asked, holding up a bright yellow pair of rain boots with daisies on them.
"Yes!" I cheered, holding out my hands. "Gimme!"
"Patience, B," he smirked.
I folded my arms across my chest and pretended to put as he grabbed my feet and pulled off the socks I was wearing before sliding the boots onto my feet. "There you go."
"That's it?" How disappointing.
"Well, you said you wanted to wear them."
"I wore them in the store, idiot. I want to wear them in the rain." I pouted silently, Vodka tears springing to my eyes.
He was silent, contemplating my statement.
"Okay then," he said after a moment. "Up you go." Suddenly, I was over his shoulder.
"Where are you taking me?" I squealed, beating him against his back.
"I'm going to make rain for you," he stated. "In the shower."
The next morning, I woke up in the floor of the bathroom, my clothes damp, my head pounding, and the ceiling light on.
"Alice? Rose?" I called, hoping that one of them had a clue as to what the Hell I was doing.
Silence.
Slowly, I pulled myself up from the floor and stumbled into my bedroom. On my bed, I found Edward, sprawled out wearing his jeans and one shoe.
"What the fuck?" I asked loudly.
He sat up quickly, completely disoriented as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Bella? Why are you wet?"
"I was hoping you could tell me…"
He erupted into laughter. I folded my arms around my hips and jerked my hip out, tapping my foot against the carpeted floor. "What?"
"You were complaining about not wearing your boots," he gasped through his laughter, pointing to my feet. I looked down. I was still wearing them. "So, I helped you out."
"By standing me in the shower?"
He nodded. "You seemed to have a good time jumping around in the puddles."
I sighed. It appeared that his intentions had been good, although his plan was muddled by Vodka. "Where are your wet clothes?"
He pointed to the floor. "Come on, let's get them in the dryer."
xXx
I sighed, placing my fork on the edge of my plate. "We were pretty damn good friends, what does it matter?" My tone made my exasperation clear as I worried that we were headed down a path that would force me defend something I didn't want to.
"It doesn't," Angela murmured after a long pause, her features softening. "You know how I am."
"Yes I do, mom."
"I just don't want to see you get hurt again," she explained.
"Edward won't hurt me."
"If you're sure." She seemed to believe my words, though I could see the doubt in her gaze.
"I am," I voiced confidently, hoping that there wouldn't be more questions to follow.
She nodded slowly, accepting my answer before speaking, her voice lighter than it had been. "Just let me know if I need to kick his ass."
I arched an eyebrow, challenging her. "Wait until you see him, you definitely will be rethinking that statement."
"I bet I could take him." Smiling, she lifted her thin arm, attempting to produce a bicep muscle. "I'm fierce."
I laughed loudly at her comment, the mood in our booth suddenly lighter as I remembered why the two of us were such good friends. "I'll tell him to watch out," I assured her, still laughing.
"You do that," she snickered, turning her attention once again to her food as my phone began to ring from inside my purse.
I pulled it out, a smile spreading across my face as I read the caller ID: Edward Cullen.
"Do you mind if I answer?" I asked Angela, my finger hovering over the send button.
She shook her head back and forth, mouthing, 'Is it him?'
I nodded. "Hello?"
"It's raining in Chicago, pretty girl," the voice I had fallen in love with breathed. Though I knew my heart wouldn't feel whole again until I was in his presence, I did feel a little piece sliding back into place at the simple sound of his voice.
"It's raining here, too," I felt a blush creep onto my face as a memory of his face, his hair, dripping with moisture from the sky floated through my mind. Coupled with that memory was the one of us declaring our love as the water beat down on our skin, the two of us oblivious to everything but each other as we stood on the balcony.
"Is it?" He asked, his voice dropping. "I like the rain when you're in it…"
"Uh huh. I'm at dinner with my friend, Angela," I offered, alerting him to the fact that I was in a public place.
"Oh," he paused, clearing his throat. His obvious uncertainty was adorable. "I'll, uh, let you go then."
"Are you sure?" I asked, my gaze flickering to Angela as she motioned to her arm again, like she had when attempting to make muscles before. I didn't want him to hang up, wasn't ready for his comforting voice to leave me. "Oh, wait, I have something to tell you."
"What's that?"
"Angela says that if you hurt me she'll kick your ass. You should see her muscles." The idea of tiny Angela attempting to leave a simple bruise on Edward was the bright spot in my otherwise depressing day.
"Scary?"
"Terrifying," I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes playfully.
"I miss you," he exhaled from the other line. "My apartment's lonely."
"Mine isn't. Jessica is having her flavor of the week, Mike, over tonight. I miss you, too, though." Desperately, completely, with my entire heart.
Angela scrunched up her nose in response to my comment regarding Jessica, fully aware of the implication of my statement.
"I'm sorry, baby, I wish there was something I could do."
"It's fine, I'm used to it by now," I paused. "I meant Jessica, not missing you."
"I knew what you meant, Bella. We'll just have to give her a taste of her own medicine when I'm in town…" He trailed off, his voice husky and deep.
"Again, I'm at dinner with Angela…"
"Oh, right, uh, I'll definitely let you go this time. Love you."
I froze, torn between saying the words that I knew he wanted to hear and sending Angela into shock if I actually did say them. "Uh, I'm glad you made it safely, too."
"Bel—"
"Bye!"
I quickly hit the 'end' button before turning to Angela, plastering a smile on my face. It felt foreign and uncomfortable. "So, what are you up to tonight?" I asked, hoping that she wouldn't draw attention to the strange end of my conversation with Edward.
She literally began to glow. "I'm, uh, hanging out with Ben."
"Ben from accounting?"
"Ben from accounting," she confirmed. "I finally, just, asked him if he wanted to get coffee one day last week."
"It's about damn time." I was happy for her, really I was, but how terrible was it that I was jealous of her? It upset me that the man she was dating and possibly falling in love with lived a mere three streets away from her while my man, my Edward, was in another state.
She sighed wistfully, a dreamy look on her face. "He's so great. We're going to a show tonight."
"That's great, Angela," I cheered, reaching across the table to cover her hand with mine. "Do you need to head out?"
"Yeah, we should probably make out way to the counter to pay," she said, reaching for her purse and standing.
I followed her towards the counter, picking up my umbrella as I did.
"Ang?" I asked, noticing that her toe was tapping anxiously against the checkered linoleum floor. "How about I get this one? Go, meet Ben."
"Are you sure?" The relief she felt was written on her face.
"I've got it," I assured her, grabbing the check from her hands and shoving her towards the door.
"Thanks," she murmured gratefully before quickly moving towards the door. Smiling at her response, I turned to face the counter. "Bella?" I heard her call as I handed the waitress my receipt.
I turned to face her. "Yeah?"
"Even though I can see that you're hurting from goodbye, it's nice to see you so…happy. Your face lit up when he called."
I blushed, a grin spreading across my face. "You too, Ang. Have fun."
xXx
That night, I listened to the raunchy noises coming from Jessica's room, annoyed and bitter. I wanted Edward to be with me, to hold me as I told him about my dinner with Angela before distracting me with his own lips and hands. But, he wasn't there. He was in Chicago, in his own apartment, alone. When the noises finally died down, I settled into bed and reached for my cell, locating his number quickly and pressing the send button.
He answered on the second ring, his voice hoarse with sleep. "Bella?"
"Hi," I whispered. "I didn't mean to wake you."
"No, no, it's okay, what's up?" I could hear rustling in the background as he likely moved to sit up.
"I, um, I just wanted to hear your voice," I answered lamely, unable to come up with anything better to say.
"I like hearing your voice." Despite the sleep that riddled his tone, I could hear his smile. In turn, it made me smile.
"I like hearing yours, too." Excellent, I sound like a preteen. "How was your evening?"
"Boring. I got take-out and caught up on some studying." I pictured him, sitting at a table as he poured over a book, wishing that I could be there to bring him snacks and coffee. And, now I sound like his mother.
"Ah, the exciting life of a med student."
"Yeah, I'm living pretty fast and furious here."
"Clearly." Come live fast and furious here.
"Do you have work tomorrow?"
I nodded, and then remembered that he couldn't see me. "Yeah, I uh, I'm going for a run in the park before, though."
"That's nice." He yawned.
"Wait, do you have class? Am I keeping you up?"
He chuckled lightly. "No, not until next week, remember? I've just got some things to catch up on, nothing major."
"Oh, right."
"Yeah."
"Are you excited for your parents to visit?" This time, it was my turn to yawn.
"Sure." He yawned again. "I haven't seen them since Christmas."
"That's a long time." My eyes were starting to get droopy.
"Bella?"
"Hm?"
"Go to sleep, pretty girl."
"But I…" I want to hear your voice, I want to know that you're there and that you're okay and that you're not the only one that feels like there heart is missing from their chest.
"We had a busy week, you need to get some rest of you'll be playing catch-up for days."
"I want to…" Keep talking to you, to catch the next flight from New York to Chicago just to sleep in your arms. I want this separation to not be hard.
"Bella, shhh, I want to stay on the phone as badly as you do, but please, sleep."
I sighed, the soothing tone of his voice winning out over my desire to stay on the phone, to have some sort of connection with him. Sometimes, I wondered if he had a sixth sense for speaking to me in a way that calmed me, making me feel completely adored and loved. A strange analogy about him and the horse whisperer skipped through my mind, but I brushed it away.
"Okay," I finally sighed, resigned.
"Okay. Goodnight, Bella. I love you."
"I love you, Edward. Talk to you tomorrow?"
"Of course, pretty girl. I'll be missing you until then."
His final words, so sweet and pure, made me want to curl up and cry myself to sleep. I pressed the end button and tossed my phone onto my bedside table, checking first to make sure that my alarm was set for my run in the morning before doing just that.
xXx
Eventually, I settled back into my daily routine. A morning run in Central Park followed by coffee from the Starbucks around the corner from my building. Work all day, dinner with friends or with myself before settling in for the evening. What I didn't settle into was the ache in my chest that refused to dissipate each time I thought of Edward, of how he was so far away and how much I missed him. With each passing day, I became more comfortable with the feeling, but it was still there, in every memory of our time together, both in Charleston and in college. Even though Edward and I had never shared time in the city, I saw a piece of him in everything—the doctor, hurrying down the sidewalk with his BlackBerry in his hand, the bottles of tequila behind the bar at my favorite restaurant, a forgotten button dropped haphazardly on the carpet. Though the familiarity was nice, it wasn't him.
Though I had a hard time shaking my longing for Edward, I was able to find little bits of joy to fill the void left behind. Instead of sitting inside my apartment, moping on the couch in front of the TV while Jessica paraded her flavor of the day in front of me, I fell in love with the city again. I went to concerts on weeknights in the middle of Central Park, usually with friends but sometimes alone. I grabbed my favorite book and took it with me to a coffee shop, enjoying a nice glass of coffee and classic words. I went to a wine tasting, and, afterwards, allowed Angela to drag me to a lingerie store for something to surprise Edward with when he visited.
Slowly, the apathy I had felt towards the city when my plane departed Charleston floated away and, like before, I found myself wondering if I would be willing to leave, even if Edward asked me to. Who am I kidding? If Edward asked me to jump, I would probably ask him how high. Regardless, when we would talk at night, either on the phone or through our new favorite form of communication, Skype, I could tell that he seemed genuinely thrilled with the idea of me finding happiness in the city again.
Before I knew it, it was the Wednesday of the weekend he was coming to visit. My mood had brightened significantly with each day that I marked off on my desk calendar with a big, red Sharpie. As I sat at my desk, having just finished marking through another day, I shook the mouse to wake up my computer before logging in to my e-mail. A grin spread across my face as I saw one from Alice, obviously home from her honeymoon and checking in.
To: Bella Swan
From: Alice Hale
Subject: Home Sweet Home
Bella,
WE'RE HOME!
Jasper and I had a great time in Italy—it was more beautiful and romantic than either of us had anticipated, truly a wonderful place to celebrate after such a perfect week with friends. Now that we're home, it's been a whirlwind of moving into the house and organizing all of our individual things to make it more a home. You'll have to come visit once we're settled! You might want to wait until the fall, though; it's hot as Hell here right now.
Rose told me that you and Edward were inseparable after the wedding and that they basically had to tell the two of you to get a room. I need details! When is he coming to New York? Are you planning a trip to Chicago? Don't leave me waiting too long for an answer!
Oh, also, the photographer has the site up for photos from the wedding! I'll attach the link, the ones from the ocean are completely breathtaking. I know, you hate pictures of yourself, but I promise these are worth it!
Ciao,
Alice
P.S. Did the four of you settle on a date for NYC Reunion 2014? Keep me updated :)
Though I wasn't 'on the clock,' so to speak, I did have another half hour before I could leave the office without looking suspicious. So, I clicked on the link, hoping to find images that captured the unique friendship that the six of us shared.
I wasn't disappointed.
As I scanned through the photographs, not bothering to enlarge them so that I could take in as many as possible at a time, I felt a smile creeping onto my face. I recalled Alice bossing around the poor photographer, dragging the six of us from spot to spot at the wedding site and arranging us in poses. When I reached the photographs taken on the shore, I was completely in awe. Alice was right: they were completely breathtaking. The photographer had, as I hoped, captured our friendship in a series of stills. Our smiles were genuine, as was the frozen laughter on our faces.
Suddenly, I missed them nearly as much as I missed Edward. I missed Alice's overflowing heart that often overshadowed her tendency to micromanage our lives. I missed Emmett, always eating when he wasn't blowing our minds with his bouts of brilliance. I missed Jasper and his relaxing nature that mellowed all of us, that held us together. I missed Rose and her bluntness, that she wasn't afraid to tell the truth. But, most importantly, I missed the bond that we shared, the easy, carefree way that we interacted no matter the time that had spanned between contact.
"Bella?" I heard my name from the doorway, looking up to find Angela standing there, an expectant look on her face as she snapped her fingers to get my attention.
"Uh, yeah?" I asked, slowly pulling my eyes away from the computer screen. "What's up?"
"You're kind of…crying."
I lifted my hands to my face, feeling the tears that had wetted my cheeks without my awareness. "Oh…I guess I am."
"Whose transcript is it? A new one from Zafrina?"
I shook my head back and forth. "No, it's, uh, just some pictures."
"Pictures that are making you cry? Are pictures supposed to make you cry?"
I smiled. "They're happy tears, I promise. I'm looking at the photographer's website for the wedding."
"Oh, can I see? Is your man in them?" She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.
I rolled my eyes playfully at her question, sliding my chair to the left as I waved her over. She hurried to my side, bending at the waist so that she could see the images more clearly.
"That's Alice, the bride obviously," I said, pointing to the screen and smiling. "And her husband, Jasper. Then there's Rose, his sister, and her almost-fiancé, Emmett."
"Almost fiancé?"
I giggled. "He's taking his time with asking her to marry him."
"And that is…" She trailed off, lifting her hand to point at Edward.
"Edward," I breathed, my eyes zoning in on the perfect planes of his face.
"I see," she smiled. "He's sex on legs, I know why you miss him so much now."
"Angela!" I scoffed, embarrassed as I punched her in the arm.
"What? It's true. He's hot. Are there more of him? And why does everyone look so surprised?"
"Because Alice had just gotten dress dirty in the water. She's a little bit obsessive about her clothing," I explained as I smiled at the sight, making a mental note to order a copy of the photo that captured the six of us better than anything had before. "But, yeah, there are more, I just haven't checked them out yet."
"Well get to it, B, I want to see more of your man."
I playfully glared at her before following her orders, grabbing a notepad and pen while I waited for the site to load at a painfully slow pace.
"Damn, look at that," Angela breathed as I jotted down a short list of items I wanted to pick up from the grocery on way home.
"What?" I asked, looking up quickly before dropping my pen in surprise, the metal clinking against the wood of my desk.
On the screen in front of me were twelve images of Edward and myself, playing in the surf, our arms wrapped around each other as our gazes met. Mouths open, we were obviously laughing at a forgotten joke, each of us with our attention focused solely on the other. One would have to be blind to miss the obvious love shared between us as we stared at each other, completely absorbed in the moment and oblivious to the camera.
"You fell in love in Charleston, didn't you?" Angela breathed, her eyes greedily scanning the pictures.
I nodded, my eyes full of tears again as I bathed them in the site of Edward and I together. There were no words suitable for describing how I felt in that moment, seeing concrete evidence of the love that we shared. I was utterly and wholly speechless.
Angela wrapped her arm around my shoulder. "It's time for you to spill the beans, girl. All the beans."
"Are you sure you want all the beans?"
"I want the entire beanstalk, yes."
I bookmarked the website with the photographs, jotting down a note to order several of them before turning to face Angela. "Where do you want me to start?"
"Oh, I don't know, the beginning would be nice," she answered sarcastically as she moved to sit in the chair across from my desk, sitting back and preparing herself for storytime.
I sat back in my chair, readying myself as I smoothed my blouse. "Well, like I said at dinner my first night back, we were friends in college, really good friends, in fact. Jake always hated him, though, always telling me that he felt threatened by our friendship and whatnot. Plus, Edward was dating this bitch, Tanya. We called her T-Monster."
Angela snorted at the nickname before inserting, "Hated Jake. Complete ass."
I glared at her, telling with my eyes to be quiet and listen or she wouldn't hear the story.
"Anyway, there was never anything deeper between us then, but then this week…" I trailed off, returning in my mind to our first night in Charleston with the Franzia and the bonfire. I recalled the way he smiled, how, suddenly, I was aware of his beauty.
As my memories traveled through the week, I shared everything with Angela, from Franzia Sunday up until our bittersweet goodbye at the airport. She listened, absorbing my words greedily.
"So, that's it, really. It just kind of happened," I said lightly when I was finished, placing my palms on my desk.
"And, you're still here, why?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean," she paused. "Why are you still in New York? You should go to him."
"He's going to be here this weekend. I'll see him in two days."
"No," she shook her head back and forth. "Why aren't you upstairs, talking with someone about transferring to Chicago? You know that we have an office there."
"No, I didn't know that," I said, completely shocked. "When did that happen?"
"I don't know, five years ago? Before we even started working here."
"Really?" How had I missed that when I started? I suppose I didn't have a reason to consider it.
"Yes, really. Do I need to make the appointment for you with our boss?"
"No, no," I retorted quickly. "I just, uh, let me see how everything goes this weekend, okay?" The idea of suddenly moving to Chicago, after being with Edward for a grand total of three weeks, completely overwhelmed me. Not because I wasn't sure of our relationship, but because I wasn't sure of myself. Did I want to be that girl that left the place that had been so good to her for a man?
"Are you worried it won't be the same?"
"Of course not," I hurriedly answered. "It's just, I love New York, and I love working in this office. Everyone here is so talented and has been so welcoming of me."
Angela nodded curtly before standing. "I think you know the question you need to ask yourself then," she said before turning to the door.
I pulled my eyebrows together, not sure what she meant.
She smiled weakly. "I think you needed to ask yourself what you love more: New York, or being with Edward."
xXx
I was completely blindsided by Angela's statement, the rest of the workday passing by in a weird blur as I attempted to organize my thoughts. Somewhere deep down, I knew that New York wasn't my forever, it never had been. One day, I wanted to get married and have children, raise them in a sweet town, away from the hustle and bustle, like I had been. At the same time, though, it was the place I was meant to be right after college, the place that had allowed me to find myself and, ultimately, healed my broken heart. But, was my time here really done? I felt like there were so many places that I still wanted to see, things I wanted to do. I hadn't gone to the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, or to see the Rockettes perform their Christmas Spectacular at Radio City Music Hall. Despite living in the city for three years, I had failed to experience it all. I knew that if I was basing my decision to leave the city on nonexistent children, then I obviously wasn't sane enough to be making such a monumental decision in the first place. Plus, Chicago was an urban area, like New York. So, I would simply be making a lateral move, not one forward or backward.
At the same time, though, I knew my love for Edward transcended my love for the city I was in; there was no doubt of that. Yes, the distance was hard and, sure, I would love to wake up in his arms every morning, but were we ready for that? Was I ready for that?
My mind was still racing that evening when my phone rang, a call from Edward.
"Hey," I answered quickly, falling onto my bed as I waited for his voice on the other line.
"What are you doing, pretty girl?" My heart jumped at the sound of his familiar voice and I smiled at his greeting; the nickname for me he had begun using in Charleston had become a regular thing and, still, I swooned every time.
"Just…thinking."
"What about?"
"My favorite things," I answered vaguely, twirling a lock of hair between my fingers.
"Hm…"
"Like, you…and New York City…"
"You know," he paused. "Your two favorite things are meeting each other soon…"
"Two days," I said excitedly, feeling my heart heal a little bit more as I said the words. I knew that the healing would be temporary, that when he boarded his flight back to Chicago on Monday morning that my heart would break a little again, but I was happy to have whatever time with him that I could.
"Actually, um, I kind of have something to tell you…" He trailed off and, immediately, I worried that he was going to have to cancel his trip. Tears sprang to my eyes and I anxiously ran my hands through my hair.
"Okay?" My voice was leery, shaking with fear.
"I'm, uh, on my way to the airport."
"You're…what?" I'm pretty sure that my neighbor across the hall heard my excited squeal.
"I'm coming to New York tonight. My flight leaves at nine."
"Is this a joke?" I asked, my voice squeaking with glee as I looked down at the holy yoga pants and stained tank top I was wearing. "Because, I swear, if this is—"
"Not a joke," he laughed lightly.
"Wait, don't you have classes and labs and medical things to learn?" I need to shower, and change, and clean up all of my shit before you get here and run away thinking I'm a slob that doesn't believe in cleaning products.
"Apparently, there's some kind of rare surgery happening somewhere in Europe at the end of the week that our professors were invited to observe. I don't know the details, I quit listening after they said they were going to cancel class for the rest of the week."
"So, you're really coming early? Here? To see me?"
"Yes," he laughed at my seemingly silly question. "I'll be there in about…four hours, if you count security and everything."
"When does your flight land? I'll meet you at the airport."
"You don't have to."
"I want to, I want to spend every possible moment with you."
He paused as if considering this. "It's going to be late…"
"I don't care. I want to see you as soon as humanly possible," I stated, the pleading tone in my voice hinting towards desperation. "Please, Edward."
"Fine," he sighed in defeat, clearly unhappy that I would be climbing into an unfamiliar taxi after dark. "My flight lands at 11:53."
"I'll be there," I said proudly, glancing at the clock and noting that I needed to leave around eleven thirty. Three and a half hours.
"I can't wait to see you." His voice dropped an octave, the huskiness present in his tone causing goosebumps to rise on my skin.
"I can't wait to see you, either," I murmured, taking my bottom lip between my teeth before my eyes settled on the mess that was my room. "But, uh, I should probably go, you know, get ready."
"Are you trying to get me off the phone?" He asked, feigning offense before his voice dropped. "Wait what are you wearing?"
"Yes, I'm trying to get you off the phone, perv," I answered quickly, giggling. "You sprung your arrival on me and my apartment is a mess."
"I guess it's a good thing I didn't just show up on your doorstep, huh?"
"It's a very good thing."
"Duly noted. I'll call you when I land. Wait, Bella?"
"Make it quick, mister."
"What are you wearing?"
"You'll find out when you get here," I answered coyly as I threw a pile of dirty clothes into my laundry hamper.
"Damn tease. I'll call you once I'm off the plane."
"Okay, sounds good. Wait, Edward?" I stopped, straightening as I stood in the middle of my messy bedroom.
"Yeah?"
"I really mean it…I can't wait to see you," I said, stopping my movements to ensure the sincerity of my words.
He exhaled deeply into the receiver. "You have no idea, pretty girl, how anxious I am to see you."
Next up: We find out how Edward spent their weeks apart, as well as his visit to New York...all in his point of view!
Leah is a lovely beta. You can thank her for the term 'slutmuffin' and Big Daddy, because she's effing awesome like that.
As always, thank you for reading and reviewing. You all set the bar high last chapter with your beautiful, sweet reviews...I loved each and every one of them. Your kind words are always appreciated.
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