Lizzy wasn't quite sure how well she would be dealing with this place if she didn't at least try to amuse herself by messing with the animatronics. Lizzy wasn't sure if it qualified as pranking or just plain messing around, but she felt she deserved something to laugh about. It was pretty much the only thing that made her smile when she came here.
"Well Foxy, it's finally happened," Lizzy told the currently still fox after reattaching the tape recorder inside him, and began unscrewing the hook from his arm. "We've gone through perhaps every song about butts I could find. 'Baby Got Back', 'Anaconda', 'Wiggle'. Everything I could find and think of." Lizzy tugged the hook off and put it on the floor. "Kinda sad how so much music seems to be about ass these days. I get it, asses can sometimes look good. I don't need a damn song about it." Lizzy reached into the plastic bag she had brought with her and took out a foam ball, stabbing it down on the screw of the now hook-less arm. "But, I know how much the song pisses you off, so from now on, I'm just going to have 'Booty Man' play inside you. Unless I'm in the mood for something else."
Lizzy took a few pink bows out of the bag and attached two around each ear before placing the last one on top of Foxy's head. Still, something was missing though, but what?
"Oh!" Lizzy snapped her fingers and pulled a sash out. A bright blue one with 'Sweet 16' written on it in bright yellow. "There!" Lizzy fitted the sash around Foxy. "That stupid show may not be on anymore as far as I know, but you scream like one of those spoiled, obnoxious brats from it!" Lizzy cleared her throat.
"Freddy," Lizzy said, trying to imitate Foxy but also with a whiney tone. "That hot girl won't die! I want her to die damn it! I want her to die! Also, you got me the wrong rum for my birthday! You ruined it, you bastard! Now I'm going to run off to my room like the little prissy pants that I am and cry over my unrequited love and desire of a threesome with Robin Hood and Maid Marian from that Disney version where those two are foxes." Lizzy laughed to herself as she snatched up the bag and hook (throwing the latter into the plastic bag) and got off Foxy's stage. "Damn, I'm funny. I should be a comedian."
Reaching the main stage, Lizzy checked her watch. She still had twenty minutes, so she had enough time. Lizzy dropped the bag on the floor for the moment and went to the Parts and Services room. The costumes may have been her potential coffin, but they would have a proper use tonight. More specifically, one of the spare heads for Bonnie.
It was heavier than Lizzy had expected and she would have to make a second trip to retrieve the ears. But the head itself was not anything she couldn't handle for a short distance, and two trips wasn't going to kill her. So holding the head piece firmly in her grip, Lizzy quickly went back to the dining room and put the head on the nearest table to the stage before running back to Parts and Services for the ears.
Back in the dining room, Lizzy took moment to give her muscles a rest briefly before pulling herself onto the stage and began taking Chica's cupcake and bib, Freddy's microphone and top hat (the latter of which she put on top of her head) and after putting them on the floor, she removed Bonnie's guitar.
"You won't need those tonight," Lizzy muttered as she got off the stage to put everything on one of the tables. Lizzy looked over the spare Bonnie head. She was going to have to get the toolbox to attach the ears, but it would be worth it for what she had in mind.
A few minutes of screwing the ears onto the head, Lizzy gave a satisfied nod before picking up a chair and bringing it onto the stage, placing it horizontally in front of Freddy so the chair's back wouldn't block the soon to be view. Lizzy quickly retrieved the spare Bonnie head and brought it onto the chair. She then positioned it all so that the Bonnie head was right in front of Freddy's crotch area. It may not have been the real Bonnie, but it was close enough to make it look like Bonnie giving Freddy a blowjob.
"Hehe… I thought Bonnie might like to see what he looks like when he's sucking you off," Lizzy sniggered as she got off the stage and took her phone out to take a picture of the moment. She chuckled to herself as she saw it came out perfectly, and quickly got on the stage once more just to take a pic of Bonnie from behind. It would help when she messed around with photoshop later on when she left the pizzeria.
"But remember, Freddy," Lizzy continued as she walked back in front. "You just can't jump right into Wonderland like Alice. You want in to Bonnie's rabbit hole, you better start serenading something to him. Not that opera tune you do when you're in my office. I think 'Let's Get It On' would be appropriate. Or maybe something like 'Blurred Lines'? But don't worry, BonBon. I still have to give you something too."
Leaving the stage to retrieve something from the bag again, Lizzy returned with a bright pink sash that said 'World's #1 Slut!' in white and put it around Bonnie. "There. Perfect. Now for Chica…" Lizzy was quick to retrieve the last items.
A rainbow coloured clown wig, a boa, oversized glasses and an apron with fake boobs.
Thank god there were shops and garage sales that sold these things cheaply.
Lizzy should be given an award for her creativity.
"Since it's nearly time for you to try and utterly fail to murder me, I suppose it's only fair to say this," said Lizzy as she stuffed the items she stole from the animatronics in the plastic bag and hung it on her arm as she picked up Bonnie's guitar. She gave a serene smile to the group on stage and tipped Freddy's hat. "Good evening, gentleman, lady and whore."
Lizzy left them and made her way to the security office, turned the tape recorder in Foxy on and hummed along with 'Booty Man'. All there was left to do was wind the music box and keep an eye on the cameras.
"You are a real bastard, so leave me alone," Lizzy sang in tune to the music box as she winded the crank. "You really are not, my one, oh no. You are. A psychopath. Like everyone else here. So to me, you're not dear."
"Ding-dong, ding…"
CRASH!
The sudden crashing sound startled Lizzy. Did… The Marionette didn't come out for now, did he? He couldn't have heard her little song just there. Still, better check the cameras. Better safe and alive than sorry and dead.
Lizzy grabbed the tablet and looked to the prize counter. The Marionette's box was still closed (thank god), so he couldn't be out. The source of the crash couldn't be Foxy. He could yell, that was undeniable, but he never bumped into anything when coming for Lizzy, unless his eyes were covered or if Lizzy shut the door on time (if that counted).
Lizzy switched to the stage camera. The chair and Bonnie head Lizzy had put in front of Freddy had been flipped over, and Freddy and Chica were looking at something off stage.
Lizzy shut her left door, ready for Bonnie to whine once again. Strangely enough though, Lizzy felt a bit excited at that moment for Bonnie to come to her door. As annoying as he was with his constant trips to her door and his shitty ass puns, Lizzy quite liked the reactions she got from him the most when she decided to mess around with them. There was just something about his slightly childish behaviour that made him look ridiculous that also made him funny in a way.
BANG! BANG!
Lizzy turned the hall light on. Bonnie actually appeared to be glaring at her if his half-closed eyes or the feeling of wrath radiating off of him was any indicator.
"I'm really tired of this Lizzy. Really tired!"
"And I'm tired of all of you trying to murder me," Lizzy sneered back before going to wind the music box again. "I think you've had a taste of the type of annoyance and anger I feel from all of you. Not so sweet, is it you little bitch?"
BANG!
"Stop calling me that! You know you wouldn't be so relaxed and confident saying that if I could move before midnight or if these doors were open!" Bonnie snapped.
"And they're closed, so my confidence is intact," Lizzy scoffed. "I prefer that spare head of yours to you yourself. At least he doesn't speak up with crap puns like you. Then again, I supposed it is busy making your master happy. Probably doing a better job than you usually do."
"My jokes aren't crap!" Bonnie snapped, dragging his hands down the glass. It didn't giving the wretched 'nails-on-a-chalkboard' sound that he had likely been aiming for. Unlike Foxy, his fingers weren't pointy and he had no hook on his hand. The metal against glass still created a sort of annoying, high squeaking noise. "It's not my fault you can't see how…" Bonnie suddenly looked more cheerful as he paused momentarily. Lizzy narrowed her eyes.
"... Faz-tastic, my puns are!"
"Puns are not funny!" Lizzy snapped, slamming a hand against the glass as she glared at the purple rabbit. "Puns. Are. Shit. Just because it makes sense you would tell them, being shit and all, it doesn't mean you should tell them!"
"And what you think you do is funny?!"
"I don't think it's funny. I think it's fucking hilarious! Now…" Lizzy started making shooing motions with her hand. "Go away. Shoo. I have animatronics more important than you to pay attention to. Even Foxy is more worthy of my attention than you."
"Hmp. I'll be back, Lizzy."
"Don't bother unless you bring news that you're all being shut down," Lizzy called after the purple rabbit as he left. "Ass," she muttered under her breath as she went to wind up the music box again, and pick up the tablet again.
It was around five when Lizzy slammed the door down in front of Freddy. Her heart was pounding fast since she was at 27% power, and had been pressing the button for her left door on and off non-stop every ten or so minutes because Bonnie just had to make constant visits to her door, followed by Foxy in between Bonnie's visits.
"Nice try, Fred. But I'm like the Gingerbread Man," Lizzy smirked as she tipped the top hat on her head. "You can't catch me. Only difference is that my brain is made of dough. Yours and the other animatronics on the other hand, that's a different story that needs research."
"We might not catch you now, but the Ginergerbread Man got eaten in the end," Freddy responded. Lizzy hummed and looked through the window. She wouldn't waste power just to turn on the lights to look at Freddy, especially since she knew he was still there.
"True, true. That's why I'm not a Gingerbread MAN. I'm a Gingerbread Girl!" Lizzy knocked her knuckles against the glass. "Run, run as fast you can. You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread Girl!"
"How long did it take you to make that up?" Freddy asked dryly. Lizzy frowned momentarily. Did Freddy just insult her? The others usually gave maybe an insult here or there, but Lizzy couldn't recall Freddy actually insulting her. Nothing stood out in her memory at least. But deciding not to let it bother her too much (what use was there to that anyway?), Lizzy gave a shake of her head.
"You really have to try and put others down, don't you? Don't like the ideas of anyone being more creative than you? You must have selective hearing. Your crap songs only appeal to kids, and if you sung them to anyone outside this pizzeria, you'd be booed off the stage. Also, people would go through the trouble of looking through garbage-no! Not garbage, they would go through the trouble of going to a dump, shifting through all the junk and shit, both literally and metaphorical, just to find rotten fruit and vegetables to throw at you and your band. I can FAR more creative than you. In fact…" Lizzy grinned and held up her left hand, the back of it facing the window and her fingers and thumb held out.
" G." Lizzy counted on her fingers, starting on her small finger, in an eenie meenie miney moe sort of way as she began singing the alphabet. On the G, Lizzy folded her thumb down and continued. " P." Lizzy held down her index finger. " V." Small finger went down. "W X Y and Z." The ring finger was next. "Now I hold my middle finger up. So why don't you all just piss off?"
"I really wish you would stop being so vulgar. This is a place for children after all."
"And that's just hypocritical," Lizzy snorted. "You saying I'm bad when you're all here murdering innocent people!"
"What makes you so certain that they're good people?" Freddy kept his voice even, but there was a certain edge to it. Lizzy kept a straight face though.
"Because your idea of every single person who comes to work as a night guard here is evil is stupid, and you should feel ashamed of your stupidity."
"What does that make you since you're still here?" Freddy asked, in a semi-innocent tone.
"Are you trying to be funny?" Lizzy asked back. "Because I'll admit, it's at least better than your songs. Ever considered dropping the mic and song and try and tell jokes instead? Leave music to the purple you with long ears and that sadistic bitch Chica?"
SLAM!
Lizzy jumped back a step or two. She could actually make out a bit of Freddy's hand that was pressed against the glass despite the darkened halls.
"I would really prefer it if you at the very least kept vulgarity towards her to a lesser extent."
Lizzy's hands shuck for a moment before she curled them into fists to stop the shaking. She was a bit surprised by Freddy here. She had always insulted the animatronics. She could sort of understand something like this not happening after Lizzy insulted them before midnight since there would be some time to cool down, but doing it now, especially over Chica hadn't made sense to Lizzy. Freddy hadn't yelled, hadn't roared. But the way his voice deepened…
"What? Are you two close or something?" Lizzy spoke up, brief loss of confidence gone. "I'm a bit surprised really. I know Bonnie's your bitch, but to cheat on him with Chica and vice versa…"
"Bonnie, is my friend. Which is more than I can say about you," Freddy responded. "Apart from the day guard, I doubt you have any friends judging by your attitude. I bet that guard is glad when you leave him be." Lizzy snorted before Freddy continued on. "And Chica is worth… Well, I was going to say Chica is worth ten of you. But Chica is worth more than just a pile of guts on the ground and I'd rather not insult her." Silence came.
"I hope next time I see you, you'll be in a suit. Screaming and regretting your actions up to then. Until then…"
The silence that followed was a clear indicator that Freddy had left. Guaranteed by Lizzy turning on the lights briefly. If it hadn't been for the nagging feeling of having to wind up the music box, Lizzy would have stayed in her spot a moment longer.
It was half five when Lizzy was checking through the cameras again later. During this, a tiny part of Lizzy wondered about Freddy and Chica. She didn't work weekends, so she never really thought about what the animatronics did when no one was around and they had the pizzeria to themselves, or how they interacted with one another.
Freddy was clearly the main boss who ever answered to. Except the Marionette. But he seemed to be liked by the animatronics here more or less, or at least respected. Bonnie seemed to get along with Chica too since there were many times they were at her doors at the same time. He might have been on fairly good terms with BB too if the soap-mouth incident was any indicator. Lizzy wasn't sure where Foxy fit in, but no one seemed to dislike him. At least, openly. She didn't know.
But Freddy and Chica… Well, it seemed unlikely, but they were probably close in a friend sort of way. Maybe. They did go to the kitchen a lot more than the others. Actually, they were probably the only ones that went there. It was all based on assumptions of course. Freddy played his music in there for some reason and Chica was the character that was supposed to get everyone excited about eating, so it made sense logically speaking. Though, could logic really be applied to a place like this? Lizzy was just thinking too much on it all.
Lizzy checked the bathroom hallway.
The Golden Freddy poster was up.
Eyes widening, Lizzy switched to another camera before her eyes glanced up automatically. Expecting the fiend itself to make an appearance.
They weren't disappointed. The Golden Freddy suit was slumped on her desk the same way it had been the first time Lizzy saw it. A small headache was slowly starting in Lizzy's head, but she remembered the advice Phil gave her. The one about looking away.
Lizzy looked down at her tablet screen and held a hand up to block any possibility of her eyes accidently glancing up.
'Go away, go away, go away, go away,' Lizzy thought in her mind as she shifted through the cameras, ignoring how shaky the held up hand was becoming.
When Lizzy went to look in the bathroom hall, the Golden Freddy poster was gone. Not entirely convinced it was safe, Lizzy slowly parted her fingers from one another to peak through the gaps. With no sign of yellow, she lowered her hand and sighed in relief when she saw the daunting suit was gone.
Lizzy needed to remember to thank Phil for that advice.
I hope everyone had happy holidays :) I probably won't get to Christmas in this story line until maybe… next month, probably? But I did post a Christmas chapter on Funny Nights at Freddy's, so hopefully that makes up for it :D