12 weeks. It doesn't seem like a long time, but when you're growing a tiny human each day seems to drag itself out. When you spend your days holding your breath, praying that nothing happens to the organism growing inside your body, 12 weeks feels like an eternity.
"Come on Cal, we're going to be late!" the brunette heard Mark Sloan holler at her from the living room of her apartment.
"Give me a minute" Callie hollered back. She was nervous, more nervous than she had ever been. Today she would see her tiny human for the first time and hear its heartbeat for the first time. She had spent the past week praying that there would be a heartbeat to hear.
"I've given you many minutes. We have to go now. I'm not letting you put this off anymore" Mark had burst into her room and started ushering her out. Callie reluctantly allowed him to maneuver her into the living room. She watched him pick up his wallet off the kitchen counter, and then grab her purse and throw it over his shoulder. Even in her almost catatonic terrified state she had to admit to herself that watching Mark Sloan, Seattle Grace Man-whore wearing a woman's purse was utterly amusing.
"Mark, I'm scared" Callie's voice sounded like that of a terrified child and it broke his heart. He stopped in his tracks and turned to look at his best friend. She was standing in her living room wearing mix-matched clothes and she was shaking uncontrollably.
Without a second thought he went to her. He wrapped his strong arms around her and let her sob into his chest. He knew he was going to have to change his shirt when she was done, but he didn't care. She was his person and he was going to be there for her, even if she was ruining a three hundred dollar shirt.
Patience. It has never been something Arizona Robbins possessed a lot of. The pediatric surgeon could be described in many ways but patient would never be a word used by anyone who knew anything about her.
"What the hell is taking them so long? She cancels last week and now she's forty-five minutes late" Arizona was pacing around the exam room, she really felt like a cigarette. The blonde was almost as anxious about Callie's first ultrasound as the orthopedic surgeon herself.
"Relax Zona. They'll be here" Sawyer replied casually as she perused through this months medical journal.
"Although if they don't hurry you're going to have to do it, I have a surgery in an hour" Sawyer was still sounding as casual as ever and this was only making Arizona freak out even more.
Arizona wasn't sure she should be attending Callie's appointment but she just couldn't help herself. The brunette had asked her to be here and saying no to Calliope Torres was not something Arizona did often.
After a few more minutes of pacing around the exam room Arizona heard the distinct click of the door, within seconds Mark had entered the room with a shivering Callie under his arm.
"Oh my God! What happened?" Arizona's mind of course shot to the worst possible scenario.
"Nothing. I'm fine. I just freaked out a little at the apartment, but I'm fine now" Callie lied as she stood up straight.
Arizona could tell that Callie hadn't slept in days. Her hair was a knotted mess, she had dark circles under her eyes and it looked as if she had gotten dressed in the dark. The blonde looked to Mark for reassurance. He looked almost as shaken up as Callie did. He simply shrugged at her. He was at a loss for words too.
"Alright, how about we get started then huh?" Sawyer's unusually cheery voice broke the awkward silence.
"Yeah let's do that" Callie replied quickly as she tore her eyes away from a worried looking Arizona. She couldn't handle the way that Mark and Arizona were staring at her. It was as if she would break down and fall apart at any moment, she knew how they felt because she was worried about the same thing.
"Just give me a minute" Callie disappeared into the bathroom leaving Arizona and Mark to whisper amongst themselves.
"What's going on with her? She looks awful" Arizona's voice betrayed her with too many emotions.
"Well if you had been around the last few weeks you would know that she's a hot mess right now and she thinks her body is a baby killing machine" Mark took a stab at Arizona.
It was true Arizona had been absent the past few weeks. Not only because of her busy schedule but because she had taken a trip out of town with Hannah. Her girlfriend had been feeling neglected and Arizona was feeling guilty. The blonde was growing more and more confused about her feelings and she thought the trip would help to point her in the right direction. Unfortunately the trip to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina where Hannah was from did nothing to ease her mind.
She had an amazing time with Hannah. They spent their days on the beach, swimming and playing volleyball or drinking vodka and tanning. They spent their nights either making out on the beach or drinking and dancing before going back to their hotel room to have wild adventurous sex. The life she had with Hannah was fun and easy. It was uncomplicated and they were completely on the same page, it was the life Arizona had always envisioned for herself and yet, she felt a gravitational pull towards a different life. A life she had never in her wildest dreams imagined she would want. It was a life that involved a tall sexy Latina and perhaps a smaller version of the beautiful woman. Arizona knew she would soon come to a crossroads in her life, she just wasn't sure which path she would choose.
"We all ready?" Arizona heard her sister's voice break her out of her daydream. Callie was already laying down on the bed, her pants unzipped and her shirt lifted to reveal the slightest bump in her abdomen.
"Uh yeah. Let's do it" Arizona put on the biggest smile she could muster and walked to Callie's bedside and took her hand.
Sawyer smirked a little to herself before squeezing the cold jelly onto Callie's stomach.
Arizona was lying on the couch, alone in her dark office. She had run out of the exam room as soon as Sawyer had wiped the jelly substance off of Callie's stomach. She was gone before Callie even had a chance to button her jeans back up. She had run straight to her office and locked the door, she hadn't moved since and it had been three hours at least.
A knock at the door broke the silence, startling Arizona out of her dark thoughts. She knew who it was, the same person that had been blowing up her phone for the last hour and a half. She knew there was no escaping now so she reached back behind her and flipped the lock on the door.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" Arizona head her baby sister voice fill the air as she stormed into the dark space.
"What do you want Saywer?" the pediatric surgeon replied with a defeated sigh.
"Uh how about an explanation?" the youngest Robbins demanded.
"Look it's all just a bit much for me ok? Callie and I aren't together anymore, I don't even know what I was thinking going to the stupid ultrasound" Arizona was being honest, it was too much for her but that wasn't why she had run out. There were things that she was feeling that she just wasn't ready to face.
"That's not what I meant. I mean what the hell are you doing breaking up with that amazing woman? Have you completely lost your mind Arizona?" Sawyer was yelling now. She didn't know Callie all that well but from what she had witnessed she could tell the brunette was perfect for her big sister.
"Maybe I have lost my mind" Arizona had been thinking it for months. She knew that she would never find anyone better than Calliope Torres but she also knew that she couldn't give the woman she loved what she wanted.