*Morning or afternoon or whatever time of day it is. Today's update comes from the wallowing basement pit of despair and headaches that is my huge hangover so I apologise if my AN isn't the most eloquent. I thoroughly intend to spend my Saturday screaming at sport, eating reheated takeaway and hopefully, if I feel better later on, finishing Chapter 32 and doing some prompts. So three things about this chapter. The first, as you might have guessed from the title, is that Jessie is back! I'm not entirely happy with his characterization here but I've tried to amend that later on a bit. The second thing is that the Doctor isn't in this chapter at all, apart from one text and by reference, which I apologise for. There are a few points in this story, by necessity, where he's not around, mainly because of the London thing. There are three main reasons for this. Firstly, it's Clara's story and she's the central character. Secondly, I can't really think of anything even remotely interesting to happen in London, so the Doctor can only be around on weekends. And thirdly, I don't like writing from the Doctor's perspective if I can help it. There is one chapter later on in which Clara is completely absent, and we get a whole chapter of the Doctor, but I'm not sure if it's going to be any good (I've not written it yet). The third thing about this chapter is that if you don't love Tom Parker already, I'd put a lot of money on you'll like him by the end of it. Sorry for the rant, I'm going back to my basement now. Thanks as ever to all my amazing readers and those wonderful people out there who follow, favourite and review. I also saw this story being promoted on Tumblr yesterday, which was a very nice surprise. Lots of love, The Potter Doctor.*
Clara Oswald was sat in the corner of the little tea shop, her face hidden behind a magazine about cars that she wasn't really reading, her eyes trained across the room to the other side, where Annabelle and Tom were sat, chatting and giggling. Clara wished the Doctor could have been here to see it, as he had been highly sceptical when Clara informed him that she was going to match-make her two best friends. But here they were, sat down opposite each other, on a date and enjoying themselves. Annabelle had been game right from the get-go, as Clara had suspected that she'd been harbouring a crush on Tom for a while. In any case, Annabelle needed someone to cheer her up, as things with her mum were not going well. As for Tom himself, things had proved trickier. The incident at New Year had shaken him up more than he was willing to admit and Clara was worried about him. His behaviour had been less than his usual bright self and he'd lost his spark. She had finally persuaded him to give Annabelle a chance and she was so glad that they were getting along.
"Another tea Miss?" asked the waitress and Clara nodded, not taking her eyes off Tom, who had reached out to touch Annabelle's hand. Clara let out a small squeal and the waitress raised an eyebrow at her.
"Sorry," Clara apologised, focusing on the woman. "Yes please, milk and sugar. Thanks."
The waitress vanished off, muttering incessantly as Clara returned her attention to Annabelle and Tom. It had been a couple of weeks since they'd returned to uni and so far everything was working out. She was missing the Doctor, as she always did and her father kept bugging her about various bits and pieces that she didn't have the time or the inclination to deal with, but things were good. In the few moments that she'd taken her eyes off of the couple, Tom had vanished. Clara swore under her breath and looked around for him. He'd probably just gone to the loo.
"Did he notice?" Tom asked, millimetres from her ear and Clara jumped a mile, Tom suppressing a snort of laughter. "Sorry, couldn't resist. I knew you'd be here, you're far too curious to let us have our date in peace Oswald. So, did he notice?"
"Of course he didn't!" Clara replied, her voice strained as she kept her eyes on Annabelle. "I didn't expect him to. It's the Doctor. I could probably change my skin tone and he'd wondered if I'd done something to my lips. A little haircut is not the sort of thing he's ever going to notice. And I didn't need him to. I didn't do it for him."
"You're still disappointed though," Tom said, always knowing exactly what Clara was thinking. And of course he was right. She'd spent ages curling it after she'd had it cut, layered, highlighted and dyed and of course, the Doctor hadn't even mentioned it, even when she made a couple of hints of various subtlety. Clara shot Tom a look. She had no interest in pandering to his games today, there were much more important things at stake.
"Don't change the subject," she hissed. "How's the date going? Why are you over here?"
"I wanted to check up on you," Tom replied. "Used the toilet excuse, that bought me a few minutes. Clara, as much as I love the fact that you're so invested in me and Annabelle, kindly do me a favour and piss off." She raised an eyebrow at him. "It's really off-putting, knowing that you're only a few feet away, scrutinising my every move and I think you might be right about Anna being exactly what I need. So just give us some space, please."
Clara grumbled as she sidled out of her seat and shot him a glance to signify that he owed her one. She kept her collar up as she shot past Annabelle to the door and lingered outside the café for a moment, watching as Tom sat back down opposite Annabelle and looked over the blonde's shoulder to where Clara was watching. His eyebrow raised half an inch and Clara was sure Annabelle wouldn't notice. But she got the message, loud and clear. Clara pulled out her phone, thumbing a celebratory text to the Doctor, and she was so engrossed in it that she almost bumped into someone coming the other way.
"Hey watch it!" a familiar voice growled, then hardened. "Oh. Hello Clara."
"Jessie," Clara breathed, immediately feeling put onto the back foot as she finished her text to the Doctor. "I mean, it's been a while. How are you doing?" She didn't know why she was being so polite to him; after all, he'd been a massive arsehole to her. But he had been fairly nice to her, especially in the hospital. Maybe he'd just made a mistake.
"I'm…" he was wincing. "I'm fine Clara," he lied and Clara knew it was a lie instantly but didn't challenge him on it. If he wanted to pretend he was fine then that was his business. Clara didn't have a right to interfere. "You look fantastic," he informed her. "I love your hair." Clara reached up subconsciously to touch it and cursed at his suaveness. "I know I was a jerk to you and I just wanted to apologise for that," he began. "And I know you're with the Doctor now, but if things don't work out between you, you know where I am. I suppose you're going to the party tomorrow night?"
Typical Jessie. He'd managed to make her feel both special and total crap in five seconds flat. Clara shot him an icy look and he took a step back. Clara wanted to say so much to him. About how whatever he thought, she and the Doctor would work out and there was nothing he or anyone else could do about it. She wanted to tell him that even if she fell out of love with the Doctor, which she didn't think would be possible or even if he broke her heart and she needed a shoulder to cry on, that she would rather jump into the nearest lion enclosure at the zoo than let it be him. She wanted to tell him that no matter what he did, he would never be able to make up for what he had done to her and that she would never be able to forgive him, let alone ever consider getting back with him. But Clara had changed. She was more tolerant, less angry. She had long ago stopped hating Jessie and now she almost pitied him. She smiled at him, a façade smile but a smile nevertheless and put an arm on his shoulder reassuringly.
"Thanks for the offer Jessie," she said, as sweetly as she could muster. "But I don't think it's going to happen. You kind of burnt that bridge. I'll probably see you at the party." She managed to avoid adding a fuck off at the end of it as she stepped past him, ignoring the angry flash in his eyes, breathing more easily as she carried on walking. The party he'd been referring to was one being thrown by another English student they both knew called Jason and of course Clara would be going, Annabelle had been talking about nothing else for the last week or so. Clara glanced back but Jessie was already walking the other way, hood up and hands in pockets. If she was being honest with herself, she was very happy to see that she hadn't been the only one negatively affected by their break up. Jessie deserved it. Although, she still couldn't quite convince herself that she didn't. At that point, her phone blared as the Doctor had replied.
Clara, I knew you could do it! I'm sure things between Tom and Annabelle will be bright and sunny forever and they'll get married and have kids and we can be the Godparents and I'm not ready to be a Godparent Clara, what if the kids start copying me? I mean what if I tie a bow tie too tight and strangle them. CLARA, we need to break them up quickly, before I accidently kill one of their children! Also, sorry I didn't mention it earlier but I noticed your hair's shorter and browner. It looks absolutely gorgeous. I love you. Doctor xx
So he had noticed after all? Clara smiled to herself and inside the café; Annabelle shot Tom a confused look as he smirked at his own phone. "Sorry," he apologised, placing it down. "The Doctor just needed some helpful hints on how to be a good boyfriend to Clara," he chuckled. "I was just supplying them." The Doctor's text was lying open and Annabelle glanced at it. 'How did I not notice the hair?! Thank you so much! Doctor.' Annabelle smiled at it. Maybe there was hope for Tom Parker yet.
Clara felt good about herself as she slipped into the dress. It was muddy brown, but she preferred to think of it as chocolate brown and matched her hair and eyes perfectly. She whistled cheerily as she puffed up her hair and applied eyeliner. Her lips were full and red and she had heels that were much too big for her. Her wine bottle was in her bag and she decided that tonight, she was going to get a good level of drunk. Not smashed, but not exactly sober either. After all, it wasn't as if she had anyone to stay sober for, with the Doctor in London. She had squealed in delight when Annabelle had shyly informed her that Tom would be joining them that night as her date and Clara had made sure she was ready to leave a few minutes earlier than Tom and Annabelle, giving them a chance to walk together alone. Clara finished touching up her makeup and slipped away quietly, not giving Annabelle a chance to ask her to stay. Clara walked quickly through the brisk night air; a feeling of unease always surrounded her as she passed alleyways and dark corners. She hurried on, shivering slightly against the cold and she felt a huge sigh of relief leave her as she knocked on Jason's door as she was greeted by a plethora of drunken English students.
Clara giggled as she danced, the wine hitting her much harder than she'd expected. She'd only had a couple of glasses, but already she could feel the world start to swirl around her. Looking back on it, she'd realise that she probably should have worked out what was going on, but she was far too out of it to put two and two together. Clara staggered backwards and felt hands on her back shoring her up. She stumbled back into the middle of the dance floor and felt the overwhelming urge to pass out. She found herself moving upstairs, desperate to find a bathroom and somewhere to crash. There was the bathroom alright and she thundered into it, unleashing the contents of her stomach on the unsuspecting toilet.
"Clara? Are you alright?"
The voice was familiar, warming and so Clara followed it, shaking her head slightly as she fell into the arms of the person with the voice. She hoped it was the Doctor. She called for him, but the Doctor didn't hear her and carried her out the room and into the bedroom nearby, which was empty. He set her down on the bed and Clara's vision focused for a moment. It was Jessie.
"Jessie?" she whispered. "Where's the Doctor?"
"He's not here," Jessie replied quietly and she saw him cross to the door and shut it. The door didn't have a lock but Jessie moved a small bookcase in front of it. Clara felt herself begin to panic as she started to realise that she was trapped alone with her ex-boyfriend. Jessie was smiling, but it wasn't a happy, warming smile, it had a sinister edge to it. "He's not coming Clara, your precious Doctor. You could have been so much happier with me. I know I dumped you, but that was my mistake. A mistake that tonight I shall rectify."
Clara felt panic rush through her and she screamed, the Doctor's name echoing as she shouted it as loudly as her tiny, weakened voice could muster. She heard him reply, she heard the Doctor call for her. Jessie looked wicked, a demon in disguise as he climbed on top of her and kissed her. Clara pushed him off but she barely had enough strength to sit up, let alone throw off a fully grown man. He snarled as they kissed and his hand was around the back of her dress, trying to unzip her. Clara wanted to die. She wanted the Doctor. She yelled his name but it was muffled and then she heard a tremendous crashing noise. Jessie carried on kissing her and her dress was sliding down her. Clara would be thankful she wore underwear looking back as the crashing intensified and then the Doctor burst into the room to answer her prayers. Jessie climbed off her to face him.
"Get the fuck away from her you bastard!" the Doctor shouted in a voice that wasn't quite his. But he had to be the Doctor; nobody else would come for Clara.
"Doctor!" Clara called weakly as Jessie took a fist to the face from the Doctor, stumbling backwards. The Doctor charged and knocked Jessie to the ground, hitting him over and over until Clara felt herself being scooped up into his arms. "Doctor!" she breathed and tried to kiss him but he stopped her with a finger to her lips.
"Sorry," he said. "I'm not the Doctor. It's me Clara, it's Tom. You're going to be alright, I promise." He didn't say another word after that as Clara tried and failed to put the pieces together in her head. She felt herself grow dizzier and dizzier until she finally blacked out.
Clara woke up in her own bed, which was a pleasant surprise. She also was wearing the same muddy brown dress that she'd gone out in, which was even more of a surprise as one of her last memories was Jessie ripping it off of her. She rolled over and saw that Tom was sat in a chair by her bed, half asleep, his face a deathly pale white. He seemed to notice her and when he realised she was awake, his eyes widened and he shook himself fully into the land of the living. The relief on his face was palatable and he pulled her into a huge hug that Clara tentatively returned, her memory of the previous night fuzzy.
"Clara, thank fuck you're alright!" he breathed. "I was so worried. You were drugged," he explained quickly as Clara's eyes bulged. "Probably by that Jessie kid, it was horrible. Annabelle didn't realise how you could get so drunk so I ran my finger around your glass and there were pill fragments in there. I put two and two together and someone said they'd seen you upstairs with your ex so I panicked and came up after you. He'd blocked the door and I heard you calling for the Doctor, so I knew things were bad. I smashed my way in and well…" he paused. "How much do you remember?"
"I remember Jessie didn't rape me," Clara replied in a blunt voice. "Because you crashed your way into the room and beat the shit out of him. Which thank you for, so much by the way. I owe you about a billion."
"You don't owe me anything," Tom said gently, as Clara's eyes were big and teary, tears sliding down her cheeks. "I just did what any good friend would do. I brought you home, tidied you up and checked that you were okay. Then I slept here, because I didn't want to leave you alone. You kept asking for the Doctor, I was so tempted to call him but I wasn't sure that it was the right time or place to worry him. You should call him."
"No," Clara replied instantly, almost choking on her tears and Tom shot her a raised eyebrow. "No," she repeated. "He doesn't need to know. I mean, if he finds out, he'll murder Jessie. Full on kill him. Nobody knows except you, me and Jessie and he's not going to say anything. The Doctor will only overreact and go mental and worry about me and I don't want to put him through that. He'll probably rush up here and he's got his job and everything. And I don't need him right now."
"Clara," Tom's voice was almost pleading. "You can't just brush this under the carpet. You were almost raped and you look really shaken up about the whole thing. I lied to Annabelle's face about what happened and you clearly need to talk to someone. You need the Doctor or someone."
"I've got you," Clara replied simply, a weak smile on her face as she crawled closer to him. She curled up in her bed, as he stroked her hair gently as she sobbed. "Thank you Tom," she whispered. "Thank you so much."
"It's okay," Tom replied gently, as she looked up at him. His eyes were electric with concern and his smile was as comforting as any she'd seen. Clara had lied of course. She did need the Doctor. Now, more than ever. But he was more important. He had to come first. The Doctor could make everything better in an instant, but he was busy, working. So Clara would deal with it the long way round, the only way she could. And Tom could help her with that. Tom knew her almost as well as anyone. He was kind, caring and she could trust him. But, she told herself, whilst all of that was very true and Tom was as good a person as she could ask for to help her move forward, he still had one enormous flaw. Like almost everyone on the planet, he had a flaw, so striking that it made her conscious of it. She couldn't escape it. Tom's only problem, the only reason he couldn't take care of her.
He wasn't the Doctor.