Leaving the grieving group to themselves, Naruto wandered back to the guild slowly. A rock that lay in his path a way back had become his little ball for the moment. It skipped ahead from the latest kick and Naruto sighed as he slowly caught up to it.

While not really all that well acquainted with the guy, Naruto still felt the loss through Erza's suffering. Kicking the rock again, Naruto couldn't help but think of the perfect world free of death, pain, anguish and all of those undesirable things. What a world that would be.

Kick.

If he could get his world to something like what this one was however, the blond would have to consider that a victory. Minor scraps are nothing compared to the massive fights currently found all too frequently through the Elemental Nations, so even being able to get villages in general to get along would be a massive step towards Jiraiya's dream.

Kick.

The proof was in the pudding though, so seeing Earthland as prosperous and peaceful as it was gave Naruto hope. Even if there weren't many signs of unity back home yet, the fact this world in another dimension had achieved it mean it was completely possible. Now that was a thought that brought a smile to Naruto's face.

Kick.

On the topic of home though, Naruto remembered he still had yet to tell anyone about the scroll he had recovered. That was pretty important so that was the first thing he had to do when he got back. Evening was approaching quickly though so if Naruto was to catch Makarov before he left, he'd have to pick up the pace.

Giving the small rock one last solid kick, Naruto began jogging back into Magnolia.

XxXxXxX

"OLD MAN! WHERE ARE YOU?"

Grumbling to himself, Naruto looked around. The guild was in yet another fight and the noise was deafening. Trying to spot a man that barely pushed three feet in height amongst numerous flying bodies was a massive task. Ducking under one hapless mage, Naruto weaved past two more before pushing himself up to the main bar. Looking along the bench, he spotted Mirajane and waved. "Mira-chan! Oi!"

Blissfully unaware of the blond's desire for her attention, the barmaid just continued to clean a dirty dish happily. Dropping his hand, Naruto batted away a stray mug flying through the air and squeezed himself through a gap between mages. Pulling his leg free from the tight space, Naruto hopped backwards a few times to catch his balance before finally dropping into a seat right in front of Mira. "Hello!"

Not expecting the surprise arrival, Mira jumped a bit. "Naruto! Where did you come from?"

The teen sighed and pointed out the door. "I was with Erza and her friends. They needed some time alone so I came back here."

Smiling sadly, Mira nodded understandingly. "Ah. Fair enough."

Nodding with her, Naruto scratched his head. "Yeah... anyway, I was just wondering if you knew where Makarov would be? I need to talk with him."

Grinning, the girl pointed up at the second floor. "He ran away to cry in his office once the fight broke out."

Chuckling, Naruto shook his head. "Yeah, I can imagine him doing that. Anyway, thanks! I'll come talk soon."

Receiving a peck goodbye to the cheek from the wonderful girl, Naruto left her with a smile on his face and a skip in his step. Cheerfully knocking Gray out of the way as he lost the last of his clothing, Naruto walked up the wall to avoid the fights on the staircase. Jumping onto the new floor, Naruto looked about and spotted a tightly barred door.

Wandering up to it, he knocked and waited. "NO! KEEP YOUR FIGHT OUT THERE!"

Hearing the wobbly voice, Naruto chuckled and cupped his mouth to the door. "It's me, Naruto! I really gotta talk with you about something!"

Cupping his ear against the door, the blond waited for what seemed like a good minute before the scratching of a lock being undone reached his ears. Standing back, Naruto looked down and struggled to hide a smirk as a pair of watery eyes peered up at him. "What do you want?"

Naruto pointed in the room. "Can I tell you inside?"

Sighing, Makarov nodded and pulled the door open wide. Walking in, Naruto stifled a laugh as the old man then managed to send a trio of mages flying when their fight came too close to his door. "GET OUT OF HERE!"

Slamming the door closed with enough force to rattle the hinges, Makarov locked the entrance and staggered wearily over to the table. Dropping himself into it, the man looked up at his younger companion and raised an eyebrow. "Well? What did you need to tell me?"

Saying nothing just yet, Naruto withdrew the scroll from his Hokage and presented it to Makarov. Letting the man gaze interestedly at the foreign script, Naruto began. "I got this about a week back while running around for the council. It seems my home managed to send that to me the same way I was sent here."

The fight outside completely forgotten, Makarov traced the symbols with his fingers. "Incredible. I've never seen anything like this."

Chuckling, Naruto pointed to the right hand side of the page. "You're looking at it backwards too. You read right to left."

Humming interestedly, the Guild Master nodded and drew his fingers across it. "So what does it say?"

Leaning back, Naruto began reading what he could from the upside down scroll to refresh his memory. "Well, the usual stuff, stay safe, we were worried and so on. The next part is that they are all doing ok and the village is being rebuilt as we speak."

Looking up at the teen, Makarov gave him a genuine smile. "That is wonderful to hear. And everyone is ok?"

Naruto nodded. "Yup, everyone is doing great. That comes on to the next part." Naruto leant forward to rest his elbows on his thighs. "They are working on a way to get me home also."

Looking up at Naruto again, Makarov narrowed an eye slightly. "Do they know when?"

Naruto shook his head. "No. All I know is that when it happens, it will be really sudden."

Straightening up, Makarov frowned. "Will there be any warning?"

Naruto shrugged. "Probably not. It all depends on when they work out the technique needed to get me back. For all I know, they could summon me home right now as we speak."

Considering what Naruto said for a moment, the old man sighed and leant back into his chair. "So your time here is pretty limited now?"

Naruto nodded. A Makarov said those words, a small lump seemed to rise in his throat. He really didn't wanna leave everyone just yet. "Y-Yeah. I have no idea when I'll go home, but it will more than likely be sooner rather than later."

Humming, Makarov shook his head. "Well, I'm not about to say my goodbyes just yet, but I can think of a few people who'd like to know of this. Namely, Mirajane, Natsu and the rest of that little group you've managed to click with."

The blond looked up in thought. "Yeah... I still have a bit of time before then though."

Reaching out, Makarov cuffed him unexpectedly. "Oi!"

Meeting his eye, the old man didn't bat an eyelash. "That's for thinking about putting it off. You need to do it and soon. Within the week at the very least."

Grumbling, Naruto rubbed his head and glared back. "Yeah yeah, I know. Quit stressing old man."

Chuckling, Makarov nodded. "Good. Now, unless you have anything else you wish to discuss, I'll let you go."

Shaking his head, the teen wrinkled his nose as he thought. "Nah, that's it."

Walking to the door, Makarov open it, kicked several mages who'd gathered around it out of the way and motioned for Naruto to leave. "In that case, I'll leave you to it."

Passing the mage, Naruto stopped as he felt a hand grasp his pants. "Oh, and if you could possibly stop this fight somehow I'll treat you to all you can eat from the bar."

The old man had no idea what he had gotten himself into.

XxXxXxX

Fifteen minutes later, the guild was completely empty save for Naruto and Makarov as the blond devoured nearly all the food they had stored.

Watching the food disappear into the bottomless blond, Makarov couldn't help but think that maybe letting the mages wreck the place would have been a cheaper alternative to feeding Naruto.

XxXxXxX

The following day, Naruto and Mirajane found themselves in the middle of a catch-up and conversing generally about everything that had been happening while the blond was absent. Nothing too dramatic had occurred though, so most of the time was spent with Naruto dictating the events that transpired at the Tower of Heaven. Naturally some parts were slightly exaggerated but that was to be expected.

Nodding and giggling at his usual boisterousness, Mira sighed in relief once all done. "Wow that sounded just incredible! You really had to put in the hard yards hey?"

Naruto thinned his eyes and nodded sternly, arms crossed to compliment the look. "I sure did. Dunno what they would have done without me."

Reaching out as the barmaid stood, she patted Naruto on the head and smiled. Collecting the cups on the table, she paused before leaving to refill them. "I'm sure they greatly appreciate all your hard effort. I would if I was them! So what did you want to drink now?"

Leaning back, Naruto shrugged. "I dunno. Surprise me!"

Giggling, Mirajane nodded as she turned. Indulging himself a bit as he watched her backside walk away, Naruto grinned and nodded. "Yeah, just another reason why she's the Fairy Tail cover girl. Very nice."

Hearing a bodily thump beside him, Naruto turned and accidentally inhaled his spit as he saw Elfman drop into the chair. Coughing several times, the blond struggled to clear his lungs as the massive man just chuckled. "I see you are rather taken by various aspects of my sister."

Coughing again, Naruto nodded through the tears. Why bother lying when you were caught red handed? "Yeah, I can't say she doesn't have a nice bum. Does that worry you?"

Shaking his head, Elfman shrugged. "As her brother, I do feel a protective rise within me, but as a fellow man I can understand your masculinity. You have also shown considerable restraint when it comes to her looks too, unlike the Master."

Laughing, Naruto remember the many times he spotted the old lecher harassing one of the many attractive ladies that were a part of the guild. "Eh, he's got a good heart. Funny as a fight watching him crack onto the women though."

Nodding amusedly, Elfman scratched his head. "Can't argue with you there. Now..." Leaning in, the massive man's face contorted to one of extreme anticipation. "Who are you most interested in seeing at the upcoming Miss Fairy Tail Contest?"

Naruto blinked. "What's that?"

Widening his eyes, Elfman sat back. "You don't know what it is? Even with you being one of the manliest men in the guild?"

Naruto shrugged and nodded. "Yeah, I guess."

Grinning wide, the man reached out and clapped Naruto solidly on his back. "Well then, don't I have a treat for you!"

Reaching into his shirt, he withdrew a piece of paper and pointed at the details. "All the women of Fairy Tail interested in participating will be competing for a prize purse of five hundred thousand jewels! The way to win? Be voted the sexiest female mage!"

Having moved right in beside Elfman, Naruto's eyes shone in delight as he sucked up a stray strand of drool. "How could I have not heard about this? This is awesome! Awww damn, there's Cana, Lucy, Erza, hell, Juvia and maybe even Levy who can enter! Plus who knows how many others there are I haven't met yet!"

Swinging a large arm around his smaller companion, Elfman laughed heartily as Naruto held the advertisement up close to his face. "So what do you think?"

Naruto slapped the paper down on the bench. "I think this will be the best day I've ever had at the guild. When's it on?"

The giant pointed at a little date in the corner. "I believe that is tomorrow."

Grinning wide, Naruto snatched up a fist in delight. "Hell yes! No waiting either!"

"What are you boys doing all huddled over like that?"

Looking up, the two saw Mira walking back with a cup in each hand. Grinning unabashedly, Naruto held out the paper slip. "Elfman just made me aware of the awesomeness that is the Miss Fairy Tail Contest! Can't even begin to describe how excited I am."

Giggling, the girl placed Naruto's drink down and slipped into the seat beside him. "I'm not surprised. Will you be cheering for me?"

Naruto snorted and raised an amused eyebrow. "You bet your sweet ass I will be. I can't wait to see what you dress up as!"

Wrinkling her nose, Mira reached out and poked Naruto's forehead. "And like everyone else you'll just have to wait and see!"

Rubbing the spot, Naruto looked over to the man on his other side. "Do you know what she'll be wearing?"

Elfman shook his head. "No, but even if I did I wouldn't tell. It isn't manly to give away secrets like that."

Pouting, Naruto glared harmlessly at the large man. "Fine then. Be that way."

Rolling her eyes, Mira reached out and scruffed up Naruto's hair. "Oh come now, don't be like that. It's not long now."

Naruto nodded. "Yeah... oh, that reminds me."

Standing, he created a clone. They exchanged a salute before it ran off to do its bidding. Sitting back down, Elfman stared at the blond suspiciously. "What was that?"

Blinking innocently, Naruto pointed in the direction of his clone. "You mean that? I just forgot to do something and I'm not about to interrupt our talk for that."

The ivory haired man narrowed his eyes and pointed at Naruto. "I'm watching you. If you pull a prank like you did on us like you did on those guards, there'll be hell to pay."

It seemed like Elfman had a good memory. Raising his hands disarmingly, Naruto chuckled. "No, no, nothing like that today. It was just something – oi! Natsu! Lucy! You lot!"

The blond interrupted himself as he saw team Natsu coming back from a simple day mission a bit early. Waving them over, he motioned for them to take a seat. Reaching the chairs, Natsu suddenly dropped down into the seat Lucy had just pulled out for herself. "Natsu! What are you doing? That was mine!"

Snorting, the boy looked up at his teammate with a grin. "On ya feet, loose ya seat. Find another one."

Smacking the boy for good measure, Lucy slid in beside Erza as the rest of the group got settled. "So what did you need us for?"

Ignoring the question for a moment, Naruto looked around. "Just waiting for a couple of other people. I'll tell you then."

They didn't need to wait long however as Cana wandered into sight, closely followed by Levy, Jet and Droy. Seeing the blond, they all grinned and waved. "Naruto! What did you want?"

"Grab a seat and I'll tell ya."

Frowning a bit at the vague response, the four extras sat down and waited. Now that more or less everyone was here, Naruto reached into his shirt and pulled out a scroll. Tossing it to Levy, he chuckled as the girl let out a joyous scream when she realised what it was. "Naruto! Where did you get this? I didn't know you had a scroll on you!"

Nodding, the blond looked at his friends. "Well, that was actually sent to me a while back. Can you understand it, Levy?"

Pouring over it furiously, the girl shook her head. "Not just yet... give me a moment."

Nodding, Naruto continued. "I'll tell the rest of you then. That came from home, my home. They managed to send it to me and long story short, they're working on a way to get me home."

Hearing this, Erza smiled gently. "That is fantastic news. When do you think you will return?"

Naruto scratched his cheek and chuckled awkwardly. "Eh, that's what they don't know. They are just working it out now so when it activates, there will more than likely be no warning."

Looking up from peeking over Levy's shoulder, Lucy blinked. "So, how will you go back exactly?

Naruto had a quick think before explaining. "You know how my clones explode?"

The group nodded.

"Well, much like that. It's called a reverse summon and I'll be pulled back to my world in a puff of smoke."

Blinking, the blond girl swallowed. "T-That fast?"

Naruto nodded. "Yeah, pretty much."

Looking down, the teen seemed a bit lost for words. "Oh..."

The rest of the group seemed to clue on pretty quickly to what that meant too and the mood seemed to drop. Natsu was the only one who had no idea what was going on so looked around in confusion. "Eh? What's so bad about that?"

Levy decided to explain for the boy as best she could. "It means... it means that we won't get to say goodbye before he goes."

"Oh." Looking up at his blond rival, Natsu raised an eyebrow. "Will you come back?"

Naruto shrugged. "Yeah, I really want to. I just need to find a way."

Raising his arms behind his head, Natsu looked over his depressed friends. "So what's the problem? He'll come back eventually. It's just like going on a really long mission."

A bit frustrated with his lack of concern, Levy looked over at the mage incredulously. "But what if he can't come back? What then?"

Natsu looked up at Naruto. "That reverse summon thing. Could you just reverse-reverse summon yourself back?"

Pursing his lips, Naruto considered the option. "Uh... maybe? I don't know enough about seals and stuff to do something that complex yet. I can try though."

Making a face, Natsu shook his head. "Don't bother then."

Catching a wack across the head from Erza, Natsu's head went though the table with a loud crack. "Natsu! That's a horrible thing to say! Apologise!"

Rubbing the massive lump, he looked around in confusion. "What? I was gonna say just get Levy to do something with her runes instead but then you hit me!"

Eyes widening in surprise at the astute suggestion, everyone turned to look at the named girl. "Would that be possible?"

Now under the spotlight, Levy fumbled around in her hip pack awkwardly. "Uh, I suppose so? I'd have to try giving Naruto something to anchor himself to through inter-dimensional travel and have a base point for him to bring himself back to..."

Not really understanding, Natsu looked around cautiously. "So that was a good idea?"

A powerful arm suddenly snaked around his head and slammed it into an iron clad breast with a solid clang. Whispering, Erza struggled to hold the tears back. "I'm so sorry Natsu. I shouldn't have hit you like that for risk of making you lose that rare good idea. I do hope you can forgive me in the future. Please, hit me as hard as you like."

Natsu wasn't really in a position to hit anything after the concussion he received, so Gray was taking advantage of Natsu having slumped to the floor and was currently resting his muddy shoes on his back.

Seeing everyone relax somewhat, Naruto sighed in relief. "Good. Now that that's sorted, I – OOF."

Toppling off his chair, Naruto looked up from his position on the ground to see Millianna straddling him. Grinning, he reached out and rubbed her hair. "Hey! How are ya?"

Grinning up at him, the girl seemed to purr. "Good! We just got back from lunch and I saw Kitty-kitty so I just had to jump you!"

Currently enjoying the affection, Naruto chuckled and wrapped his arms around the girl. "Awww I wuv you too!"

Squealing in joy, the cat obsessed teen buried her head into his neck. The moment didn't last long however as both adolescents shivered as a wave of displeasure rushed over them. Pulling her head out from under Naruto's neck, Millianna came face to face with a deceptively pleasant Mirajane. "Hello?"

Smiling, Mira bowed her head slightly. "Hello to you too. Mind telling me what you're doing on top of Naruto?"

Grinning widely, Millianna nodded happily. "This is my Kitty-kitty and I love him and he loves me! Do you love him too?"

Grinning mischievously, Naruto looked up at Mira from his position on the floor. "Do you, Mira-chan? Do you love me?"

"Oh, I didn't realise this was a challenge." Kneeling down, the barmaid then did something extremely out of character. Leaning in, she grabbed Naruto's face and kissed him deeply, effectively stunning the group into silence. "There, that's how much." Standing, she dusted her dress down and then walked away, humming happily.

All eyes were targeted on her back as she left, not a breath leaving anyone's lungs. When she disappeared from sight, the curse seemed to break and the group let out a collective breath. Chuckling awkwardly, Cana leaned into Erza and nudged her side. "What do you think, old Mira is making a comeback?"

The mage didn't reply, her eyes stretched wide, lips pulled tight and steam whistling from her ears as she heated up. Turning her gaze to Naruto, she licked her lips and called out hesitantly. "N-Naruto?"

"Hmmm?"

Visibly turning red, Erza stuttered a few time before managing to get out, "D-Did that feel nice?"

Raising an eyebrow, Naruto stared at the overheating mage before grinning. "Oh yeah. Definitely worth trying once or twice in your life."

Composing herself, the mage pulled herself to her feet, raised a fist and looked up towards the sky, a competitive gleam in her eye. "Alright! Mira has just set the standard and I for one do not want to fail it!"

Swallowing nervously, Levy looked up at the impulsive mage. "Uh, what challenge?"

Smiling back down at the girl, Erza pointed at Naruto. "This display of 'love'. I know Mirajane well enough to know when she puts out a challenge. I will not lose! As such, I have preparations to make."

Striding away, Naruto watched her feet disappear through the gate. "Naruto..."

Glancing up, he saw Natsu had some to. "What was that?"

Looking back down, Naruto shrugged. "I dunno."

Shuffling closer to Naruto, Natsu held a hand over his mouth and spoke hushedly. "So... it was as good as you said?"

Naruto's eyes twinkled. "Hell yeah. Why, you looking at Lucy?"

Lighting up a bit, Natsu looked away. "Maybe... you said it's awesome so why wouldn't I?"

Nodding sagely, Naruto reached out and placed a hand on the teens shoulder. "In that case, if you need any pointers getting that far I'm here to help."

Overhearing the mumbled conversation beneath the table, Cana couldn't help but chuckle at the boys. Sipping from a reserve flask she always kept close, the girl moved to stand up. "Cana..." Looking down, she saw Lucy staring up at her, a light blush on her cheeks as well. "When you said 'old Mira', what did you mean?"

The tall brunette pointed at Naruto who had still yet to get up. "You saw what she just did with Naruto? That was exactly the kind of thing she used to tease all the boys with when she was younger. Not kissing exactly, but crude comments that left everyone speechless."

Turning her eyes toward the guild doors, Lucy frowned slightly. "She... she used to do that?"

Cana nodded and wiped her chin. "Oh yeah, all the time. To tell you the truth, she's gotten a little boring since becoming a barmaid. It's good to see a little bit of her old flare back."

Staring back down at Naruto as Millianna took to tickling him, Lucy bit the inside of her lip. "I just hope she doesn't change too much."

XxXxXxX

Following that strange encounter, Naruto had been pulled from the guild by Levy, the girl intent on extracting more information from him about the scroll. It had been tricky escaping from Millianna's grasp but they had managed. Walking into the brightly lit streets, Naruto couldn't help but look around as everything seemed to be getting a makeover. Passing a number of tents being set up, Naruto finally had enough of just speculating. "So what's with all the stalls and stuff? There some special thing happening I don't know about?"

Turning to look over her shoulder, the girl leading him cocked an eyebrow. "You didn't know? This is the Harvest Festival!"

Naruto nodded absently as he kept peering at the numerous attractions. "Oh. I was wondering why there was a Miss Fairy Tail contest all of a sudden."

Giggling, Levy steered Naruto to a shaded bench and sat down. "Of course you'd be interested."

Snorting, Naruto crossed his arms as he dropped down too. "Dah! What hot blooded male could resist?"

Snickering, Levy pulled the scroll open before her. "Oh, maybe Master Bob? He seemed to like those whisker marks of yours."

A shiver of disgust ran down Naruto's spine as he remembered the overweight leader of Blue Pegasus. "Don't ever mention that creature's name around me. I'm still having nightmares."

Giggling at his discomfort, Levy decided to ease his pain and wriggled in as close to Naruto as she'd dare. It'd be easier than having him lean over to help.

Dragging her finger across the first line, the girl frowned and tried reading the scroll. Listening to the butchered language, Naruto had to give it to her. No clones to help with learning as well as limited access to any written material and yet here she was still doing so well.

It wasn't long before Levy started giggling as she read the scroll. Looking up at her partner, she held a hand to her mouth and stifled another burst of laughter. "You really must be tormenting whoever wrote this on a daily basis if the familiarity of these words is anything to go by."

Quickly glancing at the first few lines, Naruto sweat-dropped as he saw the chewing out Tsunade-baachan gave him. Coughing into his hand, Naruto raised an innocent eyebrow. "Oh, she just says that stuff when she gets worried."

Smirking, Levy sent him a sly grin before getting back to it. "Sure she does."

A few more minutes passed as the girl tried to read the scroll. Several times she needed a fair amount of help translating a paragraph but all in all it wasn't too bad. Setting her brain into multitask mode, Levy began asking a few questions about the people in the scroll. "So who's this Kakashi fellow?"

Grinning, Naruto raised his hands to the back of his head and slouched down into the seat. "That's my teacher or sensei if you wanna use the right word. He helped me while I was younger with learning the basics of chakra control."

"Oh?" The girl did a good job of sounding interested despite not looking up. "What's that? The basics I mean."

Naruto's eyes drifted to the tree they were sitting under. "Walking on walls, that was the first big one. After that was water walking, but I had a couple of other teachers help me with that one. From there, that gave me the grounds for flying."

Now that caught the girl's attention. Snapping her eyes up, she openly gaped at him in disbelief. "You can what?"

Raising his eyebrows, Naruto clicked his fingers. "That's right, you didn't know! Yeah, I can fly now."

Holding his hands out a bit, the blond then demonstrated by lifting off the seat several feet. Landing again, he laughed at the amazed look he was receiving from Levy, as well as a number of people around them. "Pretty cool hey!"

Shaking her head, Levy went back to reading the scrolls with wide eyes. "You are impossible."

Chuckling, Naruto just scratched his cheek. "Eh, I could only do it because I saw Erigor do it."

Levy didn't say anything more about it but the slow shake of her head said enough. Continuing reading, Levy made slow progress through the rest of the note until she came to the part about Naruto being reversed summoned home. Letting out a small sigh, she let the page droop in her grasp. Thinking things over, the girl finally looked up at an expectant Naruto. "So... you really will just disappear like that?"

Naruto nodded. "Yeah, pretty much. There's nothing I can do to stop it either."

Sinking slightly, Levy chewed her lip. "And no warning?"

Sighing, Naruto reached out and placed a hand on her head. "No, no warning either sorry."

Nodding under his hand, Naruto looked down at her in concern before the girl suddenly grabbed his arm and held it. "I don't want you to go back! Not yet!"

Not quiet expecting the outburst, Naruto stared for a moment before realising he should probably say something. "Uh, I'm not going yet you know. I was also told to have a holiday here too so that will probably extend things more."

Rubbing her face into his sleeve, Levy sighed despondently. "But it's still not fair! Everyone here loves you and you belong here!"

Sighing, Naruto looked away. "See, this is the reason I didn't wanna get too involved with everyone. It makes it hurt more."

The answer just made Levy grip his arm tighter. "Don't say that! If you did that, you'd never have got to know us the way you did and you wouldn't have joined."

Shaking his head, Naruto pulled his arm from her grasp and placed both hands on her shoulder to make her look up at him. "Oi, focus. I ain't going anywhere yet so why are you so sad? Besides, even when I do get called home I'll still come back eventually."

Blinking away watery eyes, Levy raised a fist to cover her chest. "Promise?"

Grinning widely in return, Naruto nodded. "Promise! And I never break my promises, dattebayo!"

Hearing a crash behind them, the pair looked over to see a tent fall in on itself. Several terrified people shuffled around under the collapsed fabric as they tried to find an exit. Naruto chuckled as they ran around; looking like those crappy sheet ghosts he used to dress up as to scare people in his younger years. Actually, it might almost be time for that old sheet ghost thing to make a comeback. It was fun running around like that for some reason after all. Turning, he reached out a hand to Levy and helped her up. "Come on, better go help them."

Handing the scroll back, Levy nudged him with her hip. "I haven't finished with that yet. You better let me keep looking at it later."

"Yeah, yeah." Trailing off, the pair made their way over and began helping the people out and re-standing the tent.

XxXxXxX

The day of the festival arrived and when Naruto slowly awoke from his perch in a sizeable tree, the blond had to rub his eyes a few times to make sure he wasn't seeing things. Rolling over onto his stomach, he let one leg dangle from the branch as he looked down at the massive crowds that had made their way into the streets.

Children ran excitedly everywhere as attractions drew them like moths to a lamp. Newer parents were easy to spot as they worriedly ran after their kids, desperately trying to call them back close. The general air of everything though was extremely relaxed and laughter filled the air as the festival kicked into gear.

Swinging his leg, Naruto rested his head on his arm and allowed himself a slow wake up. Yawning, the blond rubbed an eye and took his time to turn to the voice he heard call his name. Sleepily looking down, he saw Gray, Juvia and Lucy all looking up at him, the blond girl waving happily at him. Waving back, Naruto yawned as he let himself slide from the branch.

Chuckling as he heard several people scream in fright, the teen caught the underside of the branch with chakra coated feet and casually made his way down the vertical surface. Reaching the trio, Naruto just yawned again as Gray smirked and mumbled, "Show off" under his breath.

Scratching his head, Naruto blinked as Lucy frowned and pointed up at the tree. "Why were you sleeping up there?"

Picking something caught in his hair, Naruto flicked it away and shrugged. "I dunno. I got tired and slept up there. It was pretty comfy actually."

Shaking her head, Lucy looked at the teen incredulously. "You have all this money, yet you sleep in a tree?"

Shrugging, Naruto looked around. "I'm a simple guy, living a simple life. So where's Natsu? Shouldn't he be like, I dunno, fighting you or something?"

Gray snorted at the accusing finger and crossed his arms casually. "That bum is still having relapses from eating the Lacrima. Every morning he wobbles all over the place and gets in the road more often than usual."

Hearing a thump, Gray looked over his shoulder and pointed. "See? That's him now."

Peering past the small crowd that quickly gathered around the fallen body, Naruto identified that it was indeed Natsu. Shrugging, the blond turned his attention away. He'd be right. "So –"

Naruto was cut off as a retching sound followed by a few disgusted screams filled the area. Looking over, the group saw that Natsu had gone and sicked up all over the floor. Holding a hand up worriedly, Juvia looked from Natsu to Gray and back again. "A-Are you sure he'll be ok? He looks pretty bad..."

The mage just turned his gaze away. "I don't know him."

If Natsu's best friend thought he'd be ok then who was Naruto to argue? Swapping topics to something much more desirable, the blond grinned and drew the attention of the girls. "So, who's entering the Miss Fairy Tail contest?"

Puffing up, Lucy grinned unabashedly and flicked her hair over her shoulder. "Ha! I certainly am! I mean, five hundred thousand jewels... that's rent for seven months! There isn't anything that'll stop me from winning this!"

Ok, one sexy girl dressed in not much for Naruto to look forward to. "Juvia?"

The usually reserved girl was glaring at Lucy from the corner of her eyes, a dark aura floating around her as she eyed up Lucy's posturing. "Juvia must. Juvia cannot afford to lose to Lucy. My rival in love must be defeated first before Juvia can claim Master Gray as her own!"

Blinking, Naruto looked over at Gray who was explicitly not paying attention. Why he didn't want a good looking girl this devoted to him hanging off his arm, Naruto would never know. Not that it really mattered however. It just meant more eye candy for him if anything.

Looking up at the sun, Naruto raised an eyebrow as he realised the time. "So, when does this thing actually start?"

Glancing down at her watch, Lucy let out a squeak. "Crap! Registration is in five minutes! Gotta go, my rent is calling!"

Disappearing in a flurry of skirts and legs, Naruto grinned as he watched her depart. A desperate Lucy could potentially mean more skin. Hearing a grinding noise, Naruto turned to find Juvia positively radiating competitive hate towards the fleeing girl. "My rival in love, I cannot allow you to win! FOR MASTER GRAY!"

Charging off after the first female, Naruto chuckled greedily as he rubbed his hands together. This could prove to be extremely awesome. Glancing over at the still pointedly-ignoring-everything Gray, Naruto elbowed him solidly in the ribs. "So are you excited for this then?"

Shrugging disinterestedly, Gray looked out at the stalls. "Why should I be? I see them all every other day of the week."

Whining, Naruto held his hands upwards in front of him. "But the sexy! Why you no wanna go? Even Natsu is keen!"

He pointed at the teen as he struggled to pull himself towards Fairy Tail. Raising an eyebrow, Gray just shrugged again. "Meh."

Sighing defeatedly, Naruto let his arms drop and turned. "Fine, be a stick in the mud. I'll be sure to let Juvia know you're gay though. Save her the effort of trying to woo you."

Snorting, Gray spin around in shock. "Now wait up one moment!"

Grimacing, Naruto looked over his shoulder. "What? I don't swing that way."

Tackling the blond to the ground, Gray gripped his shirt and thumped him against the stone. "Now you listen here!"

A sudden explosion went off under the startled mage and Gray was left looking everywhere as Naruto disappeared from sight. Finally looking up, he saw the boy standing on a roof. Cupping a hand around his mouth, Naruto called down to the frustrated mage. "I thought you might jump me after your secret was out!"

Turning, Naruto began running away with a bark of laughter leaving Gray to splutter indignantly before charging after the infuriating teen.

XxXxXxX

A smug Naruto now sat beside an embarrassed Gray as they waited for the show to start. Any attempt from friends to find out what was wrong with the mage was met with a cold stare and no response. Despite this, Shou, Wally, Millianna, Elfman and Natsu also sat with them, the local giant eager as always to see a bit of skin and the smaller mage nibbling tentatively at a piece of bread. The other three mostly just looked around in awe at the splendour of the guild.

Happy had accompanied Natsu as usual, the small cat staring up at the sickly teen as Natsu continued to try eat. "You really are dumb Natsu. I told you not to eat anything since you'd just puke it all up again."

Whining pitifully, Natsu shook his head slightly. "But I was feeling ok this morning!"

Shrugging, Happy turned back to watch the stage. "It doesn't make you any less dumb. Just be happy you're not as dumb as Lucy yet."

A sneeze rang out from behind the drawn curtains as Happy mentioned the blond and Naruto couldn't help but chuckle. The lights began to dim and everyone hushed as the presenter walked up to the stage. Gripping his microphone animatedly, the show began. "Good morning everyone! How are we? Ready to see the beauties of Fairy Tail battle it out for the title of Miss Fairy Tail?"

A large cry erupted excitedly from the crowd as the announcer stirred their spirits. "Good to hear! My name is Max and I shall be your host for the duration of the contest. I think all you fine gentlemen out there have waited long enough so without further adieu, I am happy to announce the beginning of the Miss Fairy Tail Competition!"

All spectators let out a mighty roar as pre-recorded music filled the hall, the anticipation building as everyone struggled to maintain composure.

Looking at a little sheet in his hands, Max nodded. "Ok, first up we have one of the local girls. As one of the taller entries, she has legs that go on for miles and an alcoholic tolerance that rivals even the greatest drinkers. Sporting a trim waist that even the fittest athletes envy, I give to you Cana Alberona!"

Jumping up from his seat with a mighty cheer, Naruto dragged Gray up by the scruff of his neck as well. "You are going to watch this and you are damn well going to enjoy it! Now look!"

Slinking forward from the shadows, Cana emerged and cast an appraising view out over the crazy audience. Deciding their level of excitement was high enough, the brunette lifted her arms slowly to grab her bountiful amounts of hair and begin pushing it up across her face, all the while making sure to promote certain aspects of her body.

Whistling loudly, Naruto dropped Gray to the floor and cupped his mouth. "Hell yeah Cana, work what your mother gave you!"

Winking in his direction, she then blew him a kiss that earned the beaming blond several dirty looks from other men in the audience.

Dancing back, Max took the mic up again and screamed into it, "Alright, Cana! Time to stun us with your incredible magic! Show us what you can do!"

The volume raised even more as Cana withdrew a deck of cards before fanning them out in her hands. Letting her skills draw the cards from her hand, the brightly sparkling pieces of cardboard whipped around her rapidly, obscuring her from view for a moment before bursting out in an explosion of colour to reveal the woman in an itty-bitty two piece bathing suit.

Forcefully sucking up the strand of drool that seeped from his mouth, Naruto let out another cry of joy of approval as he gazed upon the delicious dull red and moss green bikini. Screaming again, Naruto grinned widely as he fist pumped the air. One act in and it was already the best freaking thing he had ever attended. Life was too good.

Turning to look at Erza's three friends, Naruto was pleased to find them unable to tear their eyes away from the bold girl up on the stage. Laughing, he punched each of them on the shoulder and ruffled Millianna's hair, effectively breaking the trance Cana held over them. "How good is that?"

Shou just swallowed noiselessly while Wally cleared his throat and fanned himself with his hat. "Uh... she is most certainly a dandy specimen... I wasn't expecting to see quite so much skin."

Grinning widely, Naruto thumped them again. "I know, incredible huh?" Turning his gaze to the heavily blushing third member, Naruto leaned in. "So why aren't you up there?"

Squeaking embarrassedly, the girl dipped her face into her hands. "I couldn't! I'm not a part of the guild and besides, I wouldn't be brave enough."

"Awww!" Wrapping an arm around the girl, Naruto gave her a friendly hug. "That's ok. Maybe one day you will though! I'd love to see you up there."

Shaking her head within her hands, Naruto just chuckled and turned his attention back up to the stage.

Fanning himself, Max stepped back into center stage as Cana left with a wink and a kiss. "Wow! Is it getting hot in here or has my suit got insulation?"

A few laughs sounded out but were mostly lost within the still screaming majority. Grinning, the presented checked his card again before tucking it into his top. "Ok, entry number two! One of the newer girls; she moved over to us and has graced us with her beauty ever since. Easily S Ranked in looks, this girl will wash you away faster than a tsunami. Please make welcome, Juvia Lockser!"

Reaching down and grabbing Gray, Naruto hauled the mage up and pointed his head at the stage. "Watch this girl or I tell her you tried to hit on me."

Grumbling uncomfortably to himself, the shaggy teen complied nonetheless.

Walking forward in her usual white and blue, vest and skirt combination, the girl gave a timid wave before jumping right into the magic side of her act. She began to glow from her neck down as her magic took hold and converted her entire lower body to water. Waves splashed out across the audience everywhere but within a few moments every last drop was called back up to the stage, leaving all spectators completely dry. The liquid swirled around her body like an above ground whirlpool before coagulating back into her original body, except now she had on a two piece bikini as well.

Grabbing Gray's face, Naruto pointed at the girl. "Do you see that Gray? DO YOU?"

And indeed he could, every last bit of the fittingly blue with white polka-dot bathing suit. A number of whistles pierced the air as the girl on stage twirled about, the fabric holding back her chest straining tight against the bulk behind. Ending with a low bow that exposed much cleavage, Juvia left to a great many cheers as Max walked forward. "What a girl. If you can say any one of these girls is interested in you then you have to be one of the luckiest men... or women... alive!"

This time, a great laughter filled the halls at the thought of something like that. The only one who wasn't laughing was Gray who was staring at his blond companion/torturer. "You made him say that didn't you?"

Shaking his head, Naruto grinned. "Nope, that wasn't me! Must just be the universe itself telling you just what you're missing out on!"

Dipping into his pocket, Max retrieved the slip and grinned when he saw the next name. This one will be fun. "Alright, contestant number three! We haven't seen much of this girl, but what we have has never failed to stun us into silence. Cute, bubbly, friendly and adorably mischievous, I give you Naruko!"

Snorting violently, Elfman and Gray looked over at the extremely pleased blond. "What do you think you are doing?"

Raising his eyebrow with a grin, Naruto crossed his arms. "There is five hundred thousand jewels up for grabs and I can make a female clone of myself. I'd be stupid not to try and besides, the bragging rights I'd have over any girls if I beat them is just way too big an opportunity to pass up!"

"Yeah... I suppose so." Conceding his point, Gray looked back up at the stage as a dark form walked on. Clapping Naruto on the shoulder, Elfman grinned and looked up at the stage. "In that case, I wish you all the best of luck and hope for an extremely manly show!"

"Uh..." Not really wanting that description of his female counterpart, Naruto shook his head. "You know what? Just watch."

Striding forward confidently, the blond bombshell grinned broadly at the masses of people before her. She was in a typical, old school style maid dress that had so many frills you almost couldn't tell where the dress stopped and the petticoats began. Casting an arm out and drawing it across the crowd, she grinned and cocked her hip. "Who wants a show, huh?"

The crowd screamed excitedly yet Naruto just dropped her face and sighed. "I dunno, they don't sound all that wound up. What do you think girls?"

To everyones immense joy, three other identical blonds walked out, pouting as they looked over the near frothing crowd. Shaking their collective heads, the blonds' shrugged. "Nah. Maybe we should just leave."

A roar of disapproval went up and the lead blond smirked. "What? You want us to stay?"

The foundations of the guild shook as the scream deafened everyone present. Grinning, the girls lined up back to back. "That's more like it!"

Raising their right arms high in the air, they all formed a half seal with their left hands over their chests and clicked their raised finders as they called out, "Henge (Transform)!"

Smoke filled the stage as the girls instantly changed their garments to something a great deal more revealing. The spectators slightly hushed as they waited for the area to clear, and once it did there wasn't a person in all of Magnolia that couldn't hear them. Lounging over one another were the four blonds dressed in the most inappropriate purple devil bikini anyone had ever seen. The way they slid across each other's bodies, purposefully pressing their chests together had red eruptions going off all through the crowd.

Discretely dabbing his nose, Max walked forward and clapped for the writhing group of girls on the floor. "W-Well, that was unexpected! Anyway, time for the magnificent next contestant! Possibly our most famous mage, you'd be hard pressed to find anyone who didn't know this gorgeous face. Our very own poster girl, Mirajane!"

Exploding into cheers, hats and other items were thrown into the air as the barmaid walked out. Dressed in her usual maroon dress, she waved at the crowd as they cheered. Bowing slightly, she clasped her hands before her and started speaking. "Hello all! My strength is in transformation magic, so I'll be demonstrating that!"

Crowing to the skies, Naruto desperately tried to out shout the people around him. "That's right Mira-chan! You got this in the bag!"

Right beside him was Elfman with his arm raised high, dwarfing all those around him. "That's my sister! She's a real man!"

Overbalancing, Naruto landed flat on his face before jumping back up and glaring at Elfman. "Seriously, you really need to work on when NOT to say that!"

Swiping a hand across her face, the girl began the show. Her head glowed momentarily before Happy's face replaced her own. "Just the face of Happy!"

Not at all ready for the unusual transformation, awkward cheers from the spectators replaced the more enthusiastic ones as the crowd looked on uncomfortably. Oblivious, Mira continued and swapped faces again. "Just the face of Gajeel!"

Hearing a monstrous splutter from the far side of the hall, everyone could tell the owner of that face was far from impressed.

"Nice tits Gajeel!"

Turning a gaze of death toward the comment, Gajeel instantly pounced upon a gafforing Natsu, the fire mage finding it absolutely hilarious. They quickly deteriorated into an all out brawl and were quickly kicked to the back of the hall by several spectators.

Naruto however jumped high into the air to reach Elfman's head. Whipping a hand out, he cuffed the man about the ear and landed with an angry thump. "Look at what you did! She really did turn into a man!"

Staring up at his sister, the man was rendered speechless, not actually expecting his darling sibling to go and do something like that.

Growling, Naruto crossed his arms and dropped back into his seat. That wasn't how it was meant to go.

Sweat-dropping, Max struggled to reignite the general mood of the place and moved on. "Well done, Mirajane! Um... next up, we have Erza Scarlet! Brace yourselves because we all know this girl can put on a show!"

The noise level rising again, Erza flipped out from behind the curtain to land solidly before the spectators. Smirking, the mage levelled everyone with a stern gaze. "I will not lose here. Transform!"

Lighting up with a brilliant gold shine, the woman swapped her usual uniform over for an extremely short, goth loli dress, complete with thigh high stockings, arm braces, a corset and a massive push up bra. Raising her eyebrows confidently, the mage crossed her arms under her enhanced bust and pushed it up further. "Give it up, I win."

Nodding approvingly as the crowd screamed for more, Max smiled and began speaking again. "Very nice, very nice. Ok, next up we have the little fairy! Cute, rather partial to orange, intelligent and owning one of the biggest book collections I ever witnessed, please make welcome Levy McGarden!"

Waving at the ecstatic crowd, Levy whipped out a pen and began writing something in the air. Smirking, she slapped he palm against it and called out, "Solid Script!"

Instantly the room was covered as the word 'snow' rained down snow over all the people. Following that was a beautiful warmth from the glowing word 'heat' and finally finishing off the spectacular display were hundreds of butterflies dancing through the crowd, the tiny words flapping around merrily. Jet and Droy were up the very front screaming like the love sick fanboys they were until each passed out from oxygen deprivation and slumped to the floor.

Chuckling, Max pointed at the men as he took center stage. "Would someone get them a drink? All this excitement seems to have taken its toll!"

No one made to help them though so with a shrug, Max continued. "So, time for contestant number seven. She had eyes keener than a hawk and could shoot your very heart from your chest at a thousand paces. Fairy Tail's very own sexy sniper, Bisca Mulan!"

Snorting, Naruto's eyes widened immensely as he took in the amazing lady's figure. Long, chest length green hair hung straight down her back, a hand cocked on her scantily clad hip. Like most girls he had met here, Bisca was fairly well endowed and her purple top was just barely holding everything back. Deep brown eyes drifted across the crowd and ruby red lips smirked when she noticed Naruto's gobsmacked face. She didn't linger however, quickly jumping into her act.

Nudging Gray, Naruto leaned in. "Who is that?"

Rolling his eyes, Gray shook his head. "Didn't you hear? It's Bisca, mage of Fairy Tail. Honestly, you listen as well as Natsu."

Not really the information the blond wanted, Naruto just shrugged and watched as the woman threw several coins into the air. Pulling a long stick from the air, she proceeded to fire it and a jet of concentrated magic shot out from the tip, piercing all the coins straight through their centres. Holding a lazy hand out, she caught the coins before displaying the single bullseye shot through them all.

Swallowing in surprise, Naruto nudged Gray again. "Oi, what was that stick thing she used?"

Frowning, Gray looked up at his current annoyance. "You mean the gun?"

Blinking, Naruto looked back up at the laughing woman. "Yeah, I guess that's what you'd call it. Huh, looks pretty awesome."

Turning to face Naruto fully, Gray arched an eyebrow. "You mean you didn't know what a gun was?"

Shaggy blond hair shook about. "Nope, didn't have anything like that back home."

Hearing Max then call out Lucy's name, Naruto quickly pushed his way to the back of the hall in search of Natsu. Finding him still rolling about with Gajeel, the blond pulled them apart forcefully before throwing Gajeel away across the room. "Natsu! Lucy is about to perform! If you ever want that kiss, you will come to appreciate her and show her you're interested in what she's doing! Now get up!"

Pulling the startled mage up, Naruto jumped over the group and landed back in his seat with a thump. Hauling Natsu up as Lucy began performing a cheer routine with a number of her spirits, the blond pointed up at the girl. "Now cheer her!"

Seeing that Lucy was actually performing quite the impressive routine, Natsu realised he would have cheered anyway and raised an excited hand. "Yeah Lucy! You're doing great!"

Watching the mage quickly get into the swing of things and begin cheering just as loud as the rest of the men, Naruto nodded his head sagely. It was a job well done.

Watching the act a little longer, Naruto was really beginning to get swept up in the mood of things when a rather haughty female voice filled the room. "You can't forget about entry number nine now. If you're talking about the queen of the fairies, then it just has to be me."

Walking in from the shadows, a strange women dressed completely in green hid her face with a wide, purple fan. "If you're talking about beauty, then you must be talking about me. Indeed, if you talk about anything feminine, then it must be me."

"Who is that?" Cocking an eyebrow at the condescending tone, Naruto tried recognising the voice. Long black stockings covered her legs, reaching right up her thighs to touch a slender green skirt. Rising up over her curvy hips was a tight, full body black and green corset that finished just below the start of her cleavage. Four long pieces of fabric hung down from her shoulders, almost looking like wings. Matching green gloves covered her arms and with a well practiced snap, the fancy purple fan in her hand clicked shut.

Thin spectacles rested on her nose as sharp brown eyes surveyed the silent crowd before her. Finishing up the look was an extremely well kept head of brown hair, the majority of it pulled up into a fashionable bun while leaving two long strips to frame her sharp face. "Now that this ridiculous contest is over, you can award the prize to me, Evergreen!"

Hushed whispers began filling the hall as people began muttering amongst themselves. Looking around in confusion, Naruto could hear comments like, "Evergreen? She came back?" Scrunching up his face, Naruto raised a hand. "Uh, you're hot, but not that hot. Besides, you haven't even done anything magical yet."

All noise instantly cut off as the entire populace within the hall stared at the blond incredulously. Seeing the number of gazes, Naruto huffed and crossed his arms. "What? She hasn't!"

"Ha, you must be that new boy Laxus told us about."

Frowning upon hearing that distasteful man's name, Naruto looked up at Evergreen. "You know him?"

Nodding, she opened her fan again and waved herself gently with it. "Yes, he's our team leader."

"Oh." Naruto made a face. "In that case, next time you see him, tell him he sucks for me."

Bristling, Evergreen snapped her fan closed. She may have been smiling, but the venom was clearly evident in her eyes. "You may want to watch your tongue child else it might get frozen."

Hearing these words, Gray snapped his head down. "Naruto! Don't look into her eyes!"

Having had experience with three of the greatest Dōjutsu (Eye Techniques) known to ninja kind, Naruto wasted no time with squeezing his eyes shut and dropping his head at Gray's command. Just in time too by the sound of the disappointed sigh from Evergreen. "Awww, that's no fun!"

During all this however, Lucy was getting pretty cranky with being ignored while this random woman barged in on her. Tapping her on the shoulder, the blond frowned as Evergreen cast a lazy eye over her. "What do you think you are doing? Wait your turn! My rent is on the line here!"

Not even gracing her with a response, the woman simply dropped her glasses a bit and stared into Lucy's eyes. Gasping, the younger girl seemed to suck in half a breath before being locked solid within stone. Freaking out upon witnessing the danger, Max gave up on the professional image and shouted out at the crowd, "Everyone, get away! You must run!"

Everyone looked up at Max apprehensively as he waved them away. "What are you waiting for? GO!"

At his second prompting, the gathering of men and women turned tail and fled, a few fearful screams floating from the group as they left. Only the main members of the Fairy Tail guild remained with Makarov coming out of hiding and fronting up to the arrogant woman. "Evergreen! What is the meaning of this? Are you trying to ruin the festival?"

Chuckling, the woman shook her head. "Entertainment is indispensible for a good festival right? This is just a part of it."

As she said that, the curtain behind her began to rise, revealing every female member that participated in the contest now frozen solid in stone. Eyes widening in confusion and disbelief, Makarov shook his head. "What are you talking about girl, have you gone mad? Turn them back this instant!"

Ever didn't reply however as a bright light filled the guild hall. Increasing in intensity, everything was eventually whited out before a massive thunderclap rang out revealing a sparking Laxus standing on the stage. Smirking cruelly down at the mages before him, he let his eyes rest on everyone before finally focusing his attention on Makarov. "How are we, Fairy Tail fools? The real festival begins now!"

Ignoring the taunting tone, Naruto pointed up at Laxus. "Oh, you're here! I can tell you then instead of your pawn. You suck!"

Evergreen's eye twitched but said nothing as Laxus just laughed. "Oh good, you're here. This will be most satisfying watching you suffer."

Frowning, Naruto just stared up at the man, daring him to start something.

"Freed?"

Hearing Elfman gasp, Naruto followed the giant's train of sight to finally see a rather feminine man standing up high in the rafters. Sharp blue eyes stared down at them all, his waist length green hair protecting his long, double breasted coat from the beam he was leaning on. A sharp sword hung from his belt that seemed to compliment his 'nobleman' appearance nicely.

"And Bickslow?"

Further back in the shadows was a creepy man lounging in the corner of the roof. He had a tight black shirt with purple vertical stripes covering it; metal shoulder pads resting on the fabric of his upper arms. Baggy blue pants covered his legs and a number of odd, barrel shaped dolls floated around him like little moons. An old style metal helmet covered the upper half of his face leaving his mouth free and open with his abnormally long tongue hanging out. Upon squinting, Naruto's eyes widened as he saw the guild stamp on the muscle. "You're the weirdo Mira-chan told me about! Seriously, who'd get a stamp on their tongue?"

The man just laughed but didn't say anything as he turned his attention to Laxus.

"This isn't good..." Hearing Gray mumble under his breath, Naruto looked over. "What?"

The shaggy teen pointed at the three newest mages. "They are Laxus's helpers, the Thunder God Tribe. They rarely ever pop their head into the guild, so having them all here at once can't mean anything good for us right now."

Raising an eyebrow, Naruto shook his head in confusion. "Wait, so honorary guild members pose a threat to the guild? How's that work?"

Gray didn't get a chance to reply as Laxus addressed Makarov. "Alright old man, let's play a game shall we?"

Not backing down, Makarov stared down his grandchild. "Don't do anything stupid Laxus. Turn the girls back now."

Ignoring the order, Laxus just chuckled and answered cryptically, "So, I wonder how many people will survive to be in the parade afterward? Any guesses?"

Looking at Lucy, a massive thunderbolt suddenly exploded down right beside her statue, bare inches from destroying her form. Laughing as he heard the collective terrified gasps, he wandered over and draped an arm around her form. "I'll be taking these girls as hostages to make sure you play fair. You break the rules and I'll break them, one by one. As Evergreen said, this is real entertainment."

Whipping an arm out, Makarov glared up at the conceited man. "Stop this stupidity! You don't need to put people's lives on the line like this! Stop joking around and come down from there!"

Chuckling again, Laxus shook his head. "Oh no, I'm deadly serious right now."

Jumping down, Freed and Bickslow landed either side of their leader. Staring down at the mages through his long fringe, Freed addressed the group. "This is a test. Let us clearly see once and for all who is the strongest in all of Fairy Tail."

Laughing almost insanely, Bickslow grinned down at them. "Yeah, let's play!"

"Play, play!" Imitating his words, the dolls floating around their owner shouted out the word in a metallic voice, still somehow managing to sound just as eager as Bickslow.

Voice taking on a hard edge, Laxus pointed down at the group. "The rules are simple! Last mage standing wins! I think we'll call this, Battle of Fairy Tail!"

Having remained relatively silent up until now, Natsu slammed a flaming fist down on a bench top and grinned up at the man. "Sounds like fun! I'm getting all fired up!"

Laughing, Laxus looked down at the young mage. "I like that attitude!"

Walking forward, Natsu looked up at the powerful blond. "Come on then, let's get this party started!"

Igniting his fists, Natsu screamed and attacked as he flew right towards Laxus. Shaking his head, the blond mage held out a hand. Instantly Natsu went up in a bright gold light as he was shocked violently by a massive lightning bolt. "Not so hasty, brat."

Taking over, Evergreen began explaining. "If you wish for these women to survive, you must defeat us. There are only four of us and yet there is nearly a hundred other mages in the guild. Surely it couldn't be that hard." Chuckling, she continued. "You have three hours. Three hours to defeat us all. If you don't the girls turn to dust. The battlefield is all of Magnolia. The actual fight begins when you find us. Does that sound fair?"

Growling deeply, Makarov's eyes began bleeding red as his anger rose. "Laxus... don't joke around like this!" Calling upon his vast reserves of magic, Makarov began growing, his tiny form rapidly expanding until he was easily thirty feet tall and struggling to fit within the room.

Staring up in shock, Naruto, Wally, Shou and Millianna all dropped their jaws as they witnessed the massive man's power for the first time. Naruto had had an inkling of what it was, but actually seeing it in action was a whole other thing.

Laxus just laughed mockingly however and began glowing brightly. "Now now, this is just a game. It is the entertainment for the festival!" Looking down at Naruto, the mage pointed a finger at him. "I'll be seeing you out there, sir."

Laughing again, the light around him instantly brightened to an unbearable level as he flash-banged the entire room. Eventually his laughing faded, the bright light quickly disappearing after that.

Tentatively trying their vision, the guild members present opened their eyes and looked around. Upon glancing at the stage, they realised Laxus and his three helpers had vanished.

"DAMN IT!" Slamming a massive fist down on a table, Elfman looked around in vein. "We must save sister and the rest of them! Catch that bastard!"

A supportive scream from all the mages present filled the air as they all charged toward the entrance of the guild, each eager to try and find Laxus and then beat him down for such a horrible thing. Charging along with the group, Naruto couldn't help but grin. While it wasn't 'just a game', the blond couldn't help but feel the usual rise in him when it came to a competition. Who was the strongest member of Fairy Tail exactly?

Charging towards the doors, Naruto heard Makarov let out a furious scream and charge after the departing group. Grinning, Naruto just put his head down and ran faster. This was going to be amazing.

Then the unthinkable happened. His head passed through the door but the second his stomach reached it the blond was brought to an abrupt halt. Crying out in pain, Naruto slumped to the floor holding his stomach. It felt like someone had punched him as hard as they could! A solid thump beside him made him look over and Naruto was surprised to see Makarov squashed flat against the air, an invisible wall blocking his path.

Groaning, the ninja tentatively got up while cradling his stomach. Coughing, he looked at Makarov in confusion. "What the hell just happened?"

Groaning, the small man looked up to Naruto and widened his eyes as something above the blond caught his eyes. "Look."

Following the pointed finger, Naruto was surprised to see a number of purple floating symbols in the air. Stepping back to view them better, the blond raised an eyebrow. "What are those?"

Sighing, Makarov scratched his head in defeat. "Freed's runes. Damn, more issues to deal with."

Looking back up at the words, Naruto reached out to touch the wall but found his arm passing through air. Flexing his hand curiously, he tried to walk forward but found that once his stomach reached the entrance, a wall against his gut forced him to stop. Stepping back, he studied his stomach carefully as Makarov placed a hand against the barrier. Looking over at the old man, Naruto shook his head. "I don't understand, why aren't we allowed out? Can't we just break through it?"

Shaking his head, the Guild Master sighed. "No, runes take a long time to prepare but once activated are absolute. There is no physical way to push through."

Not understanding the weird script, Naruto pointed at the words. "So what's it say?"

Running his eyes over the lines, Makarov began speaking. "Neither female statues, nor anyone over the age of eighty may leave this guild."

Snorting, Naruto looked up at the words. "Well someone made a mistake 'cause I ain't eighty."

"You mightn't be, but don't forget there are two of us here."

Hearing a deep laughter echo through his head, Naruto stiffened. Kyuubi. Of course.

Noticing Naruto's shocked expression, Makarov narrowed an eye. "Boy, are you ok?"

Blinking, Naruto looked down at the man and chuckled nervously. "Ah, yeah, just thinking about being stuck in here and running out of food."

Sighing, Makarov shook his head and muttered something while Naruto wiped away a bit of sweat. That had been close.

Hearing a gasp from down on the hall floor, both men looked over to see Natsu sit bolt upright, having just awoken from his shock induced slumber. Looking around dazedly, he grumbled something until he realised he was alone. "Hang on, has the contest started without me?"

Jumping to his feet, the excitable mage charged up to Naruto and Makarov. "What the hell is going on?"

Looking down, Naruto watched as a plan quickly formed in the astute mind of the old man. Whatever it was would hopefully help them out of here. Fixing Natsu with a steely gaze, Makarov pointed at the door. "Laxus has started the battle! You will find him somewhere within Magnolia. Get out there and crush him!"

Exploding into flame, Natsu couldn't follow the order any more happily. "RIGHT ON IT!"

Charging at the door, the mage let out a mighty cheer before being stopped flat against the wall with a solid splat. Moaning in pain, Natsu slipped to the floor as Makarov and Naruto watched on in shock. Rolling onto his side, the mage painfully moved his hands up to hold his bleeding nose. "Wh-What the hell was that?"

Groaning, Makarov dropped his hands to his side as Naruto wandered over and started poking Natsu with his toe. "What the hell is going on here?"

XxXxXxX

A/N – aaaaand cut. People, I must apologise for the delay, but I blame it on a number of new anime that have recently been released, especially 'Sword Art Online'. Here's my review of it:

If there was ever an anime that made me drop my jaw at the breathtaking backgrounds and flawlessly smooth animation, then this is it.

The actual story itself is pretty cool as well. 10'000 people are caught within a virtual world that have to fight through 100 levels to escape the game. Unfortunately the anime seems to skip a fair bit of information between episodes so you can't really get to know the characters, but even so, the main character is fantastic and the animators have really developed him well for the jumps in story.

I seriously recommend watching it, if only for the incredible art work.

Anyway, story summary. Yeah, not a lot of action happened this chapter, but I guarantee next chapter is where it is all at. I wanted to keep writing right into it, but when I realised I was 12'000 words in, I thought it best to stop.

I hope the chapter is up to the usual standard as I struggled a bit with the first half of the story, but then things started getting easier as I went on. You can probably tell where I found my second wind.

I think there was more to add, but that's the important stuff said.

Anyway for this omake, Wyrd Darcnyss misread a section of my story that made it absolutely hilarious, so I felt the need to expand on it for you all to enjoy it with us. It takes place just as Phantom Lord is about to attack Fairy Tail.

Omake

The entire guild and a good portion of the civilians that had gathered were all looking up at a giant mechanical beast that towered above the town. Six enormous, gold coloured metal legs sank deep into the water as it waded forward, the earth shuddering with every step they took. They were connected to a massive slab of rock, the rugged, half-moon shape of it making it look like it had been physically ripped from the very ground it had rested in. On the flat top of that rock sat a massive white, hexagonally shaped building. Windows covered its faces, four massive, intricately designed, thin pillars with even more windows in them, protruding upwards from each corner of the slab of rock they were sitting on.

Watching on in awe as the gigantic thing walked forwards, Naruto overheard several mages muttering amongst themselves.

"Is that Phantom Lord?"

"The freakin' guild is walking!"

"What kind of magic is this? I've never heard of such a thing!"

Due to the shock of seeing such a creation, it took Naruto a moment to realise he was losing feeling in his behind. Looking over his shoulder, he realised Erza was gripping his backside so firmly it looked like she was trying to rip it off.

That being said though, Erza was currently holding his backside. He wasn't all that sure when it happened, but he wasn't about to complain. Perhaps it was a comfort measure for her? Maybe she needed comforting in return? Naruto hoped so.

Gingerly reaching down, Naruto slowly cupped the mages backside. Eyeing her for any negative reaction, Naruto internally cheered as she just continued to stare up at the leviathan. Giving her a gentle squeeze, Naruto quickly slapped his free hand to his nose. She didn't have any undies on under the towel.

Looking from her, to the massive structure before them and then to the hand still firmly planted on his bum, Naruto couldn't help but hope Phantom Lord decided to attack more often because this was totally awesome.

XxXxXxX

A/N – short but sweet. I hope you got a laugh out of it!

Lanky Nathan