a request on tumblr from the-delivery-god

Hiyori sidled into the kitchen, drawn by the scent of something warm and brown and sweet wafting from the oven. Yato had his back to her, and was vigorously stirring a huge metal bowl.

"What smells so good?" she asked, closing her eyes as she sniffed rapturously.

"Look and see," he said, without glancing up from the bowl. His face was starting to turn red from exertion.

Hiyori cracked the oven door open and the air, shimmering with heat, burst against her face. It smelled like everything good she had ever dreamed of eating. Three trays of golden cupcakes glowed on the oven racks.

"Mmmm," she sighed. Reluctantly, she let the oven door close again.

"What's the occasion?"

"I wanted cupcakes," Yato said, voice straining as he stirred. "That's the occasion."

Hiyori nodded. She walked silently to where he stood over the counter, still whisking the bowl with a feverish energy that bordered on concerning.

"Whatcha mixing?" she asked, poking her chin over his shoulder so she could look into the bowl.

"Agh!"

Yato jumped at her sudden nearness, the spatula in his hand flicking a glob of the substance in the bowl straight onto Hiyori's nose. He looked at her over his shoulder, and as his eyes dropped to her nose, his lips twitched in what bordered incriminatingly on a smile. After a second of shocked silence, Hiyori scooped the dollop of chocolate frosting off the tip of her nose and stared at it.

"It's frosting," Yato said at last, quietly.

Without saying a word, Hiyori reached up toward him with her chocolate-covered finger. Yato, not knowing what to expect, flinched slightly. She swiped the rest of the chocolate frosting onto his nose, leaving a long brown mark there to match her own.

: : :

A few minutes later, Yukine returned to a scene of carnage.

There was frosting on every visible surface of the kitchen, and a thick, foul-smelling cloud of smoke clung to the ceiling. Hiyori was fanning the blackened remains of the cupcakes, which were still quite obviously smoldering. Yato stood on the counter and tried to silence the smoke alarm, which emitted an ear-splitting shriek every five seconds.

"What happened?!" Yukine demanded, surveying the wreckage before him with deep dismay.

Hiyori glanced up at him from the cupcakes. Her cheeks were smeared with frosting, though most of it seemed to have ended up smashed into her hair. Yukine then looked at Yato. Even though his head was obscured by the smoke near the ceiling, he appeared to have suffered a similar fate.

Yukine took a deep breath through his nose. "What," he said slowly. "Happened."

It was less a horrified question, more a dire threat.

Yato's eyes went wide. He pointed an accusatory finger at Hiyori, who paled underneath the layers of frosting. Yukine raised an eyebrow at her.

"He…started it?" she said sheepishly.

Yukine bestowed upon her a look of disappointment, then shook his head.

"This,"—he indicated the disaster zone of the kitchen with a sweeping gesture—"Better be cleaned up the next time I walk in. Or else."

Yato gulped, then nodded rapidly. Hiyori immediately set to work prying a burnt cupcake out of the tray.

But only a few seconds after Yukine had turned and exited the scene of destruction, he heard a burst of giggles coming from the two in the kitchen. The laughter was followed by a dry, flat thump that sounded suspiciously like a thrown burnt cupcake, narrowly missing its mark. He rolled his eyes.

"Children," he sighed.