Debriefing Riggs

Season 2

Episode 8

Fork-Getta-Bout-It

Martin was still smiling when he left Molly's place. It was good to have her back in his life and he loved spending time with Ben. He might not be a white picket fence kinda guy, but he was a family man. With Miranda he'd never gotten the chance to find out what kind of dad he would be, but now that Molly and Ben were around he realized he loved being a part of that little unit.

He picked up the apple pie he'd promised Brooks and Todd and headed for their place. Lately, he'd been spending more time with them than at his trailer. He even kept a spare outfit at their place and the guestroom was slowly becoming his second home. At first, that had frightened him, but Cahill had pointed out that it was a good thing and nothing to be scared of.

It was hard to believe how much his life had changed for the better. After that first session with Cahill, when he'd still needed Brooks' support, he became a regular and willing visitor to her office. This time around, he actually talked. He told her things about his old man, spending time in foster care, and befriending Brooks and Todd. The smile she gave him lately had changed. It wasn't mocking or challenging him. She genuinely felt he was making progress, which meant more to him than he'd thought possible.

He pulled up to the driveway and shut down the engine. During these last few weeks his nightmares had grown less. Sometimes, he'd still dream of his old man, but it wasn't that intense. He still woke up spooked, but managed to handle the terror without reaching for his booze. Instead, he talked to Brooks or Cahill. He still preferred Brooks though. For some reason opening up the older man was less painful.

Carefully carrying the apple pie, he made his way over to the house and rang the bell, ignoring the fact that Brooks had given him his own key yesterday. As far as he was concerned, he'd only use that for emergencies.

"Right on time," Todd said as he opened the door. "Pasta's done and we're ready to eat." He smiled as Martin handed him desert. "Looking good!"

Martin followed Todd into the living room and found Brooks seated at the table. Having dinner with the two of them was quickly becoming a habit. He spent most of his evenings here, when he wasn't babysitting Ben or spending time with Molly. After being on his own for so long, having company was weird. It had taken him time to get used to being a part of something. For so long, he'd been on his own, hiding away at his trailer, but those days had gone.

Once they were all seated with food in front of them, Martin picked up his water and sipped. Todd didn't drink and he respected that by not bring booze into their house. He hadn't known what to bring as a gift at first. Normally he'd bring wine or hard liquor, but that wasn't an option. So he'd started to bring along desert.

"How are things with Molly and Ben?" Todd liked what he saw. Martin was sober, wore clean clothes, took care of his appearance and was alert. It was a far cry from the way he'd been three weeks ago, when he'd suffered those horrible nightmares. Most nights Martin spent at their place were quiet and uneventful, but sometimes a nightmare would rear its ugly head. That was when either Brooks or he stepped in and woke their guest. "Weren't you babysitting the other day?"

"Yeah, Ben's a great kid," Martin said and smiled warmly. "Molly's dating someone called Chip, or is it Chad? I can never remember." He'd checked the man's background and had found no convictions, which marginally soothed him. He would keep a sharp eye though.

Brooks read between the lines and smiled at his lover. It was obvious Martin was in love, but either the Texan didn't want to acknowledge that or he was oblivious. He couldn't rule out option number two. "And you're doing your best to chase off the guy?"

Martin grinned. He had found a few parking violations, so maybe he'd have the guy's car towed. No one needed to know though. "Who me? No, I'm a saint!"

Todd laughed warmly. "No one believes that, Martin!"

Well, they did know him pretty well and wouldn't be fooled.

"Are you staying for the night? It's late and the bed's comfortable." Brooks preferred having Martin at his home, instead of holing himself up at the trailer. Luckily, Martin's resistance to crashing at their place had lessened and he spent more time here.

"I might." The shower's water pressure was great and he did want to clean up before heading for Molly's in the morning. He might have, or not, fixed that leak and wanted to check on it before work. He also appreciated sleeping in a bed these days. Or, his body did, especially after running himself haggard all day. He was growing soft and it worried him.

"Are you still talking to Cahill?" Brooks finished his pasta and already had his eye on the apple pie. This was a great opportunity to catch up.

"Yeah, it's difficult though." Martin no longer considered lying or manipulating them. They'd seen him at his worst and hadn't turned their back on him. They'd proven their worth and deserved his honesty. "But you're right; it's helping. I never thought talking would make a difference." He had Brooks to thank for encouraging him to take that step.

"Keep it up," Brooks said encouragingly. "You're doing great."

"Thanks," Martin whispered, growing shy. He'd found a home here. Roger and Trish had wanted to provide him with one too, but it hadn't been what he'd needed. Brooks and Todd, however were.

"And the nightmares? Are they leaving you alone?"

Todd's question wasn't so easily answered. "I have good nights," he said and shrugged. Todd had helped him find a routine that helped. These days, he left a light on, kept his door ajar, and listened to some relaxing music before he turned in. The fact that he wasn't drinking or smoking weed helped too. "I do get the occasional one," he admitted, knowing they wanted the whole truth. They'd harass him if he kept things from them. "About that night," he said, knowing they'd get it. "And about finding my mother after she committed suicide." He grew quiet; that was a new one and they didn't know about that yet.

Todd moved his chair a little closer. "Is it okay if we talk about that?"

Martin chuckled, loving the way both Brooks and Todd always made sure he was okay with discussing something. That was probably why he opened up to them more easily. Cahill was more aggressive during their sessions. "Yeah, I'm not sure what you want to know though. She put a gun to her head and pulled the trigger. I found her like that," he said dismissively.

Todd knew better than to let that stand. "What you're describing are the events. What about the way you experienced them? You must have been scared."

Martin stared at his hands, which were curled around his glass. He shrugged again, trying to find the answer to Todd's question. Why had he brought this up in the first place? Now they were going to make him open another wound, but then again, the injury had never healed in the first place. "I probably was. All I remember is the shock of finding her like that. I wanted to check on her, hold her, I guess, but my old man held me back."

Concerned, Brooks tried to capture Martin's gaze, which proved futile. "What happened afterwards?"

"What do you mean?" Martin frowned at Brooks, not getting the question.

"Was she buried?"

Ah, now he got it. "Yeah, a few days later, once the body was released. We went into town for the funeral and dad got dead drunk and was looking to start a fight. I drove us home that day, he was in no condition to do that." A lot was hazy, he realized. He had to work hard to remember what happened after the funeral.

"So you went home and your father was drunk?" Brooks read the confusion in those amber eyes. Something was wrong.

"Yeah." Deep lines appeared on his brow as Martin tried to remember what had happened that night. That was when he realized he'd blocked those memories for a reason. Cringing, he pushed back his chair and got to his feet, quickly walking toward the window and staring outside. Damn them for making him remember!

Worried, Brooks and Todd looked at each other. "I've got this," Brooks whispered and made his way over to Martin. "Talking about it helps, you know that by now. Why don't tell us?"

"It's not pretty," Martin warned them, turning around to face them. Though, that wasn't anything new.

"We're listening," Brooks said, including Todd. "Let us help you carry the burden."

"It's nothing new. He beat me up again." But that night had been different.

"What aren't you telling us?" Martin had tensed up and his hands turned into fists, telling Brooks the Texan was even now struggling with those memories.

"He didn't use his belt that time. Mother needed a cane when she got weaker and he used it to beat me up." Those blows had been devastating, both physically and emotionally. The next morning, his father had dropped him off at the local hospital, telling staff he'd gotten tangled up in a fight and needed his injuries checked. The doctor on call had tried to talk to him, but he had locked out the man. After everything Nathan Riggs had done to him, he still wanted to protect his father. "I healed up eventually."

Brooks carefully rested his right hand on Martin's shoulder and turned the younger man toward him. "I'm sorry that happened."

"Me too," Martin muttered beneath his breath. "I couldn't expose him. I didn't want the police to check on him. He was all I had left."

"I get that," Brooks assured him. If he ever got his hands on Nathan Riggs the man would pay for what he'd done to Martin. For now though, he could only support the other man. In his heart he knew more horrid revelations would follow down the line, but he'd stay at Martin's side and support him. He'd be the father Martin never had growing up.

/

"Are you going to be okay tonight?" Brooks asked, checking on Martin before turning in for the night. "You've been remarkable quiet since dinner." Since Martin had told them about what had happened after the funeral. That worried him. He leaned against the doorway and watched Martin turn down the covers.

"I think so," Martin replied after seriously thinking it over. "Talking does help. It takes away the sting." He sat down on the side of the bed and looked at Brooks. "The secret's out and I feel better." He still had a hard time talking about himself, but he was trying. "I buried a lot of stuff and tried to forget about it, but it never went away. It just festered. Dragging it into the light – it helps."

Brooks was glad to hear it. "You know the drill. Wake me in case you need me or have another nightmare. You don't have to do this alone." During these last few weeks, either he or Todd had sat with Martin when a nightmare had been particularly bad. By now, Martin should know they were there for him.

"I will," Martin said and meant it. "Night, Brooks."

"Get some sleep, Martin. See you in the morning." Brooks left the door ajar and walked toward his bedroom, where Todd was already waiting for him.

Martin left on the light on the side table and curled up in bed, wrapping the duvet around him, creating a perfect nest. He smiled as he closed his eyes. With Brooks and Todd he'd found something he'd never known before – a home!

TBC