"…How is this happening?" I say.

"How is what happening?" Lee asks.

"How is…THIS happening?!"

"…Listen, Lucas. You've been thrown into a world where people can shoot fire, lightning, and wind from their finger-tips. There are freaky-looking zombies – some of which don't even look human, but more like this weird…slimy...thing made out of rags in order to form a distinctly humanoid shape. Anyway – there are also weird, ancient beings that can transform into dragons with the help of a stone, and there is even a shape-shifter that turns into a freaking giant killer rabbit. And don't even get me started on the weird lack of physics that make it so that snow stops falling in one freaking spot."

"…You saw that too, huh?"

"Of course I did."

"Well…all of those things are definitely odd. Still...this particular problem only defies human logic - those other problems are just how nature in this world seems to work. So, this moment stands out to me."

"Explain."

"You seriously need me to explain?! Well, first of all: Gregor is having a screaming battle with the Shepherds over there! Do you realize how far away they are from each other?! We can see Gregor – and that's only because you happened to find the southwest village in this chapter – but I can only barely see the Shepherds! Hell, if I hadn't played the game I wouldn't even know that they were here! They look like…tiny little dots from over here! How can Gregor possibly be having this conversation at a quiet enough volume that we can't hear what he's saying?! What, is there some kind of megaphone tome, as well as a hearing-aid spell?!"

"…Fair enough. Go on."

"Second: Gregor is still having a screaming battle with the Shepherds over there! AND HE IS SURROUNDED BY THE PEOPLE WHO KIDNAPPED NOWI. Honestly, what the hell is going through their heads?! 'Oh, look, there's that little manakete that we had captured until a little while ago. Hm… What's she doing running out and about with that old man, there? And is that guy talking with that group of people over there? Should we maybe do something about this? Nah, let's just let them talk – it's only polite, after all!' I mean, COME ON!

"Third: I am going to make the assumption that when Gregor freed Nowi, Nowi made the intelligent decision to try and run away from the people who had her in their captivity until then. If so, then how did they ever end up in a position where Nowi and Gregor would be able to run back into the middle of the group of Grimleal? I mean, even if Nowi, for some reason, just began running around in circles, I don't see why the Grimleal would move all the way out here instead of just surrounding Gregor and Nowi! I mean, it doesn't even take that many people! It's just the two of them!

"And, finally… Now, this doesn't really contain a huge lack of logic, I'm simply curious: If Nowi thinks that Gregor's trying to kill her, why doesn't she just turn into a dragon? I mean, she's going to be doing that against the rest of the gang pretty soon!"

"…Those are some fair points," Lee responds. "But some questions you just don't want to know the answers to."

"…I don't see how this could possibly be one of those things."

"Neither do I. Still, by this point in life in this world, I've decided that, whenever I stumble upon something like this that makes my head hurt, I just leave it be. I mean, it's not like complaining about it's going to make it suddenly make sense.

"Yeah, I guess…" I say, reluctantly. I take a longer look at the scene. "…How long are they going to be talking?"

"Who knows?"

"I don't see why we don't just jump out right now and attack the Grimleal."

"Well, first, there's the fact that we'd have to explain that decision to Raimi and the others. Like you said, we can barely see the Shepherds over there, and we can't even hear what Gregor's saying. We really have no logical reason to attack at this point. Second, they'll be more distracted when they're chasing after Gregor and Nowi. That's when we'll strike, taking the claim that we're defending the old man and the little girl."

"…And this is why you're the tactician, and I'm not."

"When everything else in the world doesn't make sense, somebody needs to."

"…What does that have to do with anything?"

"I don't know. I just really wanted to say that."

Gregor's still having the conversation with Chrom. How is it possibly taking this long?

I take a look around. Lee put the others on standby, stationed in different locations around the village, surveying the scene until something suspicious happens. I wonder if they're getting as impatient as I am.

I give Lee a little nudge. "Here, let me show you something. We should prepare something for a little sneak-attack."

Lee smirks. "All right. Show me what you've got."

"…On second thought, it'll be quicker if I just tell you how to do it right away."

"Okay then. Do tell."

I give his face a quick glance. I can't really tell if he really expects me to be able to tell him something that he doesn't already know about this world. Can't say I blame him – he has been here much longer than I have. But I kind of doubt that he's stumbled upon my fusion spells when seemingly everybody else in this world seems to have missed them.

"Okay, I want you to stick out your hand, and recite the fire spell, save for the last syllable."

Lee raises an eyebrow, but does as I instructed. When he sees the fire stay in his hand, he makes a facial expression that can only be described as "Not Bad". Heh. Still not impressed? Fine then. Then try this out-

"All right. So, that last syllable blasts the ball of energy from your hand in whatever direction it's facing. Now – don't blast that just yet – but I want you to recite the lightning spell stopping before the last syllable, also."

Lee grins, and then summons the lightning. He grins while staring at his hand.

"Now, what does this do?" he says, fingers twitching.

I quickly grab his arm. "For the love of god, don't blast it yet! Just blast it at the enemy once the battle starts."

Lee's grin grows wider. "Sounds powerful. Sweet…"

I grin, as well. "Now, try to keep this under your hat for now, okay? Out-of-worlders only, 'kay?"

"Sounds awesome."

I look again in the direction of Gregor. "Are they still talking?"

"Seems like it…"

Just then, Gregor and Nowi begin to run away, and then the Grimleal start chasing them.

"Okay – here we go!" I say, leaping out of our little hiding spot, electrocuting my left hand as my right heads for my axe.

"Everyone! First priority – defend that old man and little girl over there!" Lee shouts to the others.

As I rush towards the Grimleal, I see Lee send his ball of flaming-electricity or…electric-fire, or whatever at the enemy. It hits a small group from behind, and I hear Lee scream, "Holy shit! That is swee-ee-eet!"

"Isn't it just?" I say, grinning.

That explosion seems to have caught some of the enemies' attention. A few of them turn around and head for us, leaving their friends in charge of taking down Gregor and Nowi. I think I see Gregor running more or less in our direction – some direction south, at the very least. I guess he sees the people who are trying to help him?

I swing my axe at the nearest guy – some myrmidon. He easily dodges the axe, but isn't able to avoid my boot. I bring my axe down on him and blast lightning at a nearby fighter while Lee cuts open a nearby mage.

I turn to the left, and see a cavalier riding at me. I blast wind at him, knocking him off of his horse, and then dive out of the way before his horse can run me over. I run at the guy who fell before he can get up, and slash at his neck.

I take a good look around. Gregor and Nowi – my god, she looks magnificent as a dragon – appear to be having absolutely no trouble with the few people who have the balls to face them. Raimi's also holding up pretty well, like the huge pile of armour that she is. To the north, I see some of the Shepherds brawling it out, but there's a whole lot of them versus a few left of the Grimleal, so I don't really worry about them. Looking more south, Gaius and Maribelle – I had Lee pair them up on purpose – could maybe use some help, though there aren't really many people left going after them.

Lee snaps me out of my train of thought. "Come on! There's a group headed for Gaius and Maribelle right now!"

I look in the direction he's pointing. How the hell could I have missed that? I summon both fire and electricity as Lee does the same. Grinning, we blast the explosive balls of power at the enemy.

"You know…I don't think that I will ever get tired of that."

"Yeah… Oh, whaddaya know. They have reinforcements."

The "way more enemies" rule in this world is really beginning to piss me off. I mean, honestly, where the hell do these guys come from?! I make a mental note that another reason that killing is the only way we'll survive is that it'll really help keeping this world from overpopulating any time soon.

Gasping, I ask Lee, "Is…that the last of them?"

"Around here? …I think so."

I turn around, and see Gaius, Maribelle, Raimi, Gregor, and some other guy (I forget his name. I feel sorry for him, for this, but he's even more forgettable than Kellam. He is literally just one of the generic extra soldiers who came with us from the camp – how am I supposed to remember his name?) fighting a large group of Grimleal.

"Better…go help them, yeah?" I pick up a light jog – I don't have enough energy to waste running.

I eventually make it, and begin cutting stuff up.

"Took you guys long enough!" Gaius shouts.

"Shut up! There were only two of us! There are four of you! 'Sides, gods know how many Shepherds are over there, and look at how far they've progressed!"

Lee appears to have caught up. "So, who's the old man?"

"Oi! Gregor is not old!"

Lee gives Gregor a look, while shooting lightning at a nearby fighter. "I never said I was talking about you. I meant that old man over there." He points south, towards the enemy boss. "I mean…he's just kind of standing there. He doesn't seem like much of a threat, but…he also seems pretty dangerous."

"Oh, that is Chalard. Now he is old man. Gregor once employed to him." Gregor squints at the guy.

"Listen," I hear Raimi shout as she thrusts her lance into a mage. "I think it's great that you guys still appreciate the art of conversation, but if you could maybe focus on taking down these guys, that would be just great, thanks!"

"Yes," Maribelle shouts. "I don't want to have to heal any wounds that you bring upon yourselves with your own idiocy!"

"Tch… Leave it to the ladies to kill all of the fun…" Gaius mutters, removing his sword from a mage's cloak.

"There shouldn't be any fun to kill when you're killing!" Raimi shouts.

"Do you enjoy killing our fun?" Lee asks her, parrying a blow from a myrmidon.

"Very much so, yes!"

"Even though you just said that there shouldn't be any fun to kill when you're killing?" I shout at her. Spin around, and kill.

"People can have fun when killing other people's fun! That's the only reason I do it!"

"And here I thought you were just worried about us losing our heads…"

"In your dreams."

I look around. "…Is that everyone?"

"Seems to be," Lee answers.

I take a look north, and see Chrom's giant blue hair making its way towards us. I then look back at our little group.

"…Hey, where's Gregor?"

Looking in the other direction, I see the man running towards the other, creepier old man. Instinctively, I start to run after him.

"Take look around you, old man! No more allies! Your jigging is up!"

Now, what do we have here…?

"Gregor, I think this is the end of a beautiful friendship," the old man replies.

Huh? Did I hear that right?

Yeah, did that guy nearly quote Casablanca?

No, I mean the beautiful friendship part!

"Gregor is confused. Beautiful friendship?"

"It could have been one. You showed promise."

"You were going to sacrifice poor little dragon-girl!"

"All you had to do was your job."

"Gregor always do duty for employer. But that not duty. Was bad murder. Gregor could not do. Never."

"…I'm disappointed in you, Gregor."

Lee finally catches up with me. "Hey. ...What's going on?"

"Hm? Oh, those two seem to have had some sort of friendship before all of this. Now they don't seem entirely excited about fighting each other."

"Ah… Should we maybe help Gregor out?"

"Are you kidding me? Hell no! Honestly, two old people about to fight to the death with what seems to be an epic back-story, and you don't want to watch the outcome?! This is BEAUTIFUL!"

"Oi! Gregor is not old!"

"Sorry!"

Lee whispers to me. "Okay, we really need to get you out of this world – the almost daily habit of stabbing people appears to be giving you some slightly morbid thoughts."

"Explain."

"…You just called the idea of two old men fighting to the death beautiful!"

"…Wow, you're right."

"…So, are you going to do anything about this?"

"Nah, I'm still going to watch. You going to join me?"

"Well, seeing as I'm supposed to be the tactician here, I probably shouldn't. It is my job to make sure that people on our side don't die."

"What makes you think that Gregor's going to die?"

"Nothing, but you can't take chances."

"Well, you really seem to be the only one who's worried about him. Everybody else in the army is just regrouping way behind us."

Lee turns around. "Well I'll be damned. They don't care about taking down the enemy boss?"

"Well, it is just one old man. Compare that to the large amount of everybody else that we just killed, and you really shouldn't think you have nothing to worry about."

"Well…I still feel as if I should help him."

"Too late. While we were talking, Gregor just cut that guy in half."

Lee takes a good look as Gregor puts is sword in is sheathe.

"Well, I hope that battle was as epic as you wanted it to be."

I shrug. "Ehh, not really. I mean, there comes a point when watching an old man repeatedly dodge a sword becomes nothing more than watching an old man repeatedly dodge a sword. And, y'know, occasionally this weird purple thing popped up in the sky… Still, you know what would be even more epic? Two old people having a sword fight!"

"No, I think we need to keep you away from old people for a little while…"

"But-"

"No buts."

"…So, what's the situation?" Gaius asks.

"Emm's been captured, and Gangrel plans to execute her," Chrom says sternly. "Needless to say, we're going to save her."

"…With just the few of us?" Lee asks. "Wherever the exalt is going to be held, there's bound to be a ton of security nearby her. I think we'll need much more people than the small amount we have with us right now."

The generic Feroxian soldier pipes up, "I can go return to the camps at border control and request more help from the soldiers over there. It sounds like this mission is top priority."

"That would be great, thanks," Robin says.

Lee looks at Robin. "So, do you have a plan devised to save Emmeryn at this point?"

Robin frowns at the ground. "Nothing seems certain, at the moment. But…I know that I have to think of something!"

"I'll help," Lee offers. "I also have a knack at tactics and war strategy."

Robin raises an eyebrow.

"It's true," I say, backing him up.

Robin grins. "Well…sure. I'd never turn away an offer for help at this."

Lee looks up at the rest of us. "We'll just be talking gibberish to you guys. We'll tell you guys what we want of you when the time comes. You can just leave for now."

I catch Lissa kneeling by an oasis. I…think she's looking at a reflection of the evening sky. What a cliché.

"Hey," I say.

"Oh, hey, Lucas."

"…You worried about your sister?" I ask.

She scoffs. "Of course I am…"

I really don't know how to continue this conversation. I know for a fact that just leaving right now wouldn't exactly help the situation, but I also know for a fact that Emmeryn will die. I don't want to raise Lissa's hopes to high, just to have them crushed.

Lissa breaks the awkward silence. "…Is she going to be all right?"

"Of course." I really couldn't think of anything else to say to that.

"…I listened in on Robin and that Lee guy's conversation in there. You, Lee, and Raimi are going to free Phila and her Pegasus Knights from the prison Gangrel's keeping them in once the Plegians' attention is turned to the direct attack on the people near Emm's execution site. Then, you guys are going to fly up there and help Emm down." Lissa then turns to me. "Which means that you're going to be the ones protecting her."

Lissa hardens her look on me. I begin to feel a little bit scared.

"So…you better make sure nothing bad happens to her, all right?"

"S-sure! You can count on me!" The words tumble out of my mouth before I can even think to stop them.

"Promise?"

I hastily nod my head.

"Shake on it?"

I hesitate – and not just because I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. Something smells about this entire set-up, but my mind's currently too scrambled to think about it, and I then quickly grab her hand, and shake it.

Something slimy slips down my sleeve.

Of course, I think before I fall into the water, scrambling to get the frog out of my sleeve.

I eventually manage to shake the frog out.

"You know…" I say, moving strands of wet hair out of my eyes, "it is generally frowned upon to pull pranks on people whom have just been entrusted with your dearest sister's life."

Lissa doesn't pay me any attention. She's too busy laughing her ass off.

"Yeah… I've heard a few people complaining about your little tricks with the frog. Frankly, I'm shocked I didn't see that coming… Still, why do you have so many frogs? What, do you keep a collection of them or something?"

Still grinning, Lissa doesn't reply.

"…You're kidding me."

"Nope."

"And you just keep a few of them inside your dress, just in case?"

"Hey, you never know when having a frog up your sleeve will come in handy!"

"…You're right. I'll never know when that will come in handy." I get up out of the water, shivering. "So, was that bit about Lee, Raimi, and I rescuing the Pegasus Knights true? Or was that just a hoax to set me up in that position?"

"Of course it's true. I wouldn't lie about something like that, and I don't even know who this "Raimi" person is."

"She's the person I wouldn't stop calling "Bitch" up in Ferox."

"Oh, her."

"So…this means I'm still stuck with the job of protecting your sister?"

"You better believe it. And I'm holding you to that!" Lissa then runs back to camp.

Cold, drenched, and shivering, I stand there.

Gods damn it, Lucas. Look what you've gotten yourself into.

AN: Well...I don't think I'm going to be as busy as I recently was, which means I don't need to rush these things anymore...hopefully... Now if I could only put a stop to my excessive procrastinating...