Hi everyone! This week's chapter is a bit angsty I'm afraid; it deals with Alec's thoughts about his parents' reactions to his relationship with Magnus, and how their behavior might change the longer that Alec and Magnus are together. I'm not going back to edit the chapter where I have Robert and Maryse being supportive of Alec, because I feel like they really might have felt that way initially; after losing Max, I think that they would have been in a place where, if Alec was happy with someone, they would have supported him regardless of their feelings about the person in question. But as their grief faded, I can see both the Lightwoods starting to be less than thrilled with Alec's romantic interest in Magnus.
Since a couple of you have asked, I'll just warn you right now that I'm planning to end this fic the way that Cassie ended CoLS, and I'll probably go on hiatus until "City of Heavenly Fire" is released. However, I do plan to write a one-shot in which MAJOR SPOILER ALERT, SERIOUSLY, IF YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED "CITY OF LOST SOULS" YET, THEN STOP READING RIGHT NOW! Magnus and Alec get back together. (I'm hoping that a story like that will be a nice balm to soothe all of our souls while we wait for CoHF—ugh, 2014 seems so far away…)
Two more notes: sorry, but since I'm going to be traveling again this weekend, no new chapter until next week. (I'm planning for that one to be a bit more fan-servicey though. :)) Also, for the Energize WIP Award, it looks like winners are determined in part by review numbers, so if you could make sure to review this week, that would be great! If you'd like to learn more about this contest, please go to the following website: www*energizewipawards*blogspot*com/2011/09/nominees*html (Just replace the asterisks with periods.)
Thanks as always for your reviews, everyone, and I'll see you again soon! :)
Disclaimer: Cassandra Clare is the author of "The Mortal Instruments" series, and WHY ISN'T IT 2013 YET? (The cover of CP2 is so pretty, and I'm really excited for the "City of Bones" movie…:))
Chapter Twenty-Six: Alec's POV
As Alec walked back toward Magnus's apartment after the unsettling meeting with the Seelie Queen, he tried not to think about how badly the fairy's illusion had rattled him. Or the news that his father might be staying in Idris as the new Inquisitor. Instead, he tried to focus on the dinner he'd just had at Taki's, and before that, the encounter he'd had with Aline earlier that day.
After seeing Aline with Helen at the Institute, Alec couldn't help but feel strangely pleased. When he'd kissed Magnus in the Accords Hall in Idris a few months ago, he'd had no idea that he might be helping anyone else find the nerve to finally reach out toward the person they wanted. What Aline had said had made him happy, but…a bit uncomfortable too, if only because she'd reminded him that his life now was very different than it had been during those happy days in Idris when he'd first been with Magnus, and his parents had seemed to understand.
Things had changed between Alec and his father. Now that Robert Lightwood was being considered for the position of Inquisitor, the scrutiny with which his family was regarded had increased, and though his father knew that he'd traveled with Magnus for a while, he never asked Alec about him anymore. In fact, he and his father had barely spoken since they'd separated in Idris after his parents had first formally met Magnus—they'd known him professionally already, but meeting him as their son's boyfriend had, in retrospect, probably unnerved both his parents more than they'd let on.
Alec wondered now if the support that his father had once expressed for his relationship with Magnus had been entirely genuine. And if it had been, had Max's recent death made his father eager to embrace Alec's choice of lover, simply because he didn't want to risk losing another child? Maybe his father had only been feigning enthusiasm, fearing that if he didn't, he might drive a wedge between himself and the only son he had left. Maybe he'd said things he hadn't really meant. Now that he was back in Idris, surrounded by the Clave and their standards of right and wrong, maybe his father had no inclination to see him again until his new position had been assured.
Assuming he does become the Inquisitor, Alec thought grimly. Between me dating Magnus and Isabelle's habit of serial dating Downworlders, I guess Dad's probably not thrilled with either of us right now. Having kids like me and Iz must make it hard to advance in the Clave…
Alec frowned at the thought of hurting his father's chance for promotion. Part of him really did care, but a larger part of Alec was hurt that his father apparently cared more about the Clave than his own family. If his relationship with Magnus cost his father the position he wanted, then so be it. Alec had spent far too long hiding who he really was, and now that he was being honest about who he loved, he didn't care if people disapproved. At least, he was trying not to care. He felt a little sorry for his parents, knowing that the Clave was judgmental enough to make them suffer for his choices, but Alec wasn't sorry enough to pretend he was someone else. Not anymore.
Of course, try as he might to be indifferent to the situation, Alec would care if his father lost the job of Inquisitor because of him. But caring wouldn't change anything. He loved Magnus, and the Clave, his father, everyone just needed to get used to that.
Then there was his mother. Though at least she was willing to speak to Magnus (and generally acknowledge his existence in other ways too), Alec could tell that she didn't really approve of his relationship with the High Warlock of Brooklyn. She'd never complained outright, but it was obvious that she thought his dating Magnus was like Isabelle's dating a new Downworlder every other week—in her opinion, he wasn't in love, he was just trying to rebel, and Alec doubted that her assessment of the situation was going to change anytime soon.
Alec suddenly found himself thinking back to a night in Milan, back when he and Magnus had been traveling. They'd had an incredible dinner, before going skinny dipping at twilight in a pond that, Alec suspected, must have been cloaked from prying eyes by some spell of Magnus's, since they somehow hadn't been spotted by anyone in the rather busy park that the pond occupied. Then they'd gone back to their hotel, kissing all the way up to their room, where Magnus had bent him over their dining room table before dragging him off to bed. When they were finished though, Alec hadn't fallen asleep as quickly as he usually did. They'd had cappuccino after dinner, so though they were both exhausted, they'd laid awake for a long time, smiling drowsily at each other.
Alec had almost been asleep when he'd thought of the question, and then he'd asked it without even thinking.
"Do you ever…think about your parents?" he'd said. "I mean…do you miss them sometimes?"
Magnus had smiled sadly then. "I suppose I do. Or rather, I miss them for who they might have been, if they could have accepted what I am—if we could have understood each other. Does that make sense?"
"Yeah," Alec had said quietly, and then he remembered kissing Magnus until they'd both dozed off. Alec hadn't asked Magnus about his parents again after that. As he climbed the steps to Magnus's apartment, he supposed that in spite of his current difficulties with his parents, he couldn't really find the energy to criticize them too harshly. Aside from the fact that there were too many more important things going on right now, Alec knew that he was lucky in a way, that his parents were as accepting of him as they were. How could he complain to Magnus that his parents were distant or dismissive when Magnus's parents had genuinely hated and feared him?
Alec sighed to himself. It's depressing, being grateful that my parents don't hate me, he thought. As he entered the building, he found himself still struggling to ignore the memory of what the Seelie Queen had done to him. That was something else he couldn't tell Magnus about, because of course, mortality was still the elephant in the room that they were both trying to avoid discussing. Alec frowned and rubbed his eyes wearily. All he wanted to do was to get in bed with Magnus and sleep for a long, long time…