[Michael tries to talk to Gob about Franklin, then he broods about psychological damage.

Note: in the pilot, the narrator says that Michael has not spoken to Lindsay for over a year. He doesn't say why.

Also in season 1, in "Not Without My Daughter", Gob tells George Michael about an awkward threesome he once had with a guy and a girl, but his nephew did not seem to notice this. More will be revealed about Gob's sexual history in later chapters, and events here shall be different than in the Dirty Little Secret universe.]

Eventually, the parking lot at Sitwell's estate emptied, and Gob was able to finally start the car and drive away without being accosted by reporters.

Michael was glad, and he hoped that George Michael and Maeby had managed to escape.

But after they drove a while, Gob realized that the cake in his pocket was melting from his body heat and leaking frosting on him,so he pulled the car to the side of the road and parked. He got out of the car and tried to clean his tux, but he just wrapped the cake in another magic handkerchief.

Michael looked around for a trash can and asked why Gob didn't just throw away the cake now. "You're not going to eat it, are you? It's been on the ground."

"No, it's for the doves back at the hotel. They'll probably be hungry by now."

"Oh. Well, I thought they might have had their fill at Dad's party when they flew away from you."

Gob shrugged and said, "They didn't steal that much food, and it's been hours now. We better feed them so they'll be quiet and not wake up anybody else at the hotel tonight."

"Yeah I guess so." Michael grinned and was reminded of the sex they would have soon. They better not get caught by the hotel employees. "I can't wait to move out to an apartment." Michael had already made inquiries at a few places, and was trying to decide on one that would fit his budget and make his savings last.

"Yeah." Gob came back to the car and considered giving Michael the handkerchief of cake to hold, but then he offered to let Michael drive instead. "It's your birthday."

Michael laughed, even though it really wasn't his birthday. So they switched seats and Gob held the handkerchief carefully to not make a mess.

Michael loved getting to drive a good car, after being saddled with the staircar for so long. Even when he bought a Corvette once with his company shares, Michael didn't get to enjoy that for long before selling it. He said, "We should get a car like this when we leave for Cabo."

"A car? I thought we were going on my yacht?"

"Yeah, but once we're living in the model home in Cabo, we won't need the yacht anymore. And besides, someone might recognize it from the news." Michael had been arrested on that yacht, after all.

"Oh." Gob saw his point and frowned. "Yeah and my Segway has my name on it. We gotta change our names and make fake IDs."

"Exactly," Michael said. Few people rode Segways, anyway, so that vehicle would make them stand out too much in Mexico.

Gob said sadly, "Well, I guess we'll have to sell that stuff then, and that would give us money for a car."

"Yeah." In case he had sentimental attachment, Michael offered, "You could always give the Segway to Steve Holt before we leave, so he can hang onto it for you." Maybe someday they'd come back to visit George Michael, and tell Steve the truth as well.

Gob shrugged and decided that he'd rather give the Segway to Tony Wonder as a farewell present, but if he mentioned it out loud, Michael would nag him about Steve instead. So he didn't say it. "Having a car again would be fun." Dad had continually given Gob cars over the years to make Michael envious. It also kept Gob happy when he played softball in the annual games against Sitwell. Of course, that didn't mean that Dad was any nicer to him, still yelling at him during games for doing a victory dance. And he never played catch with Gob when he was a kid either.

"Yeah, we could drive to lots of places." Michael thought about it happily. Escaping the family and starting over. Being together and free at last.

Gob said, "We could go camping finally and bring Franklin along too."

Michael frowned and felt worried. Maybe now was as good a time as any to talk to Gob about Franklin. "Gob, um, don't you think you should leave Franklin here when we go?"

"What? You mean put him in storage again, or give him to Steve? But Franklin likes hanging out again, and he doesn't like Steve. He's too clingy."

"Gob, you don't need Franklin. Your act with him got you beat up once, remember?" This was in 1987 while Michael was still in high school, but Gob had left home to escape Eve Holt. That was why Gob was at a club in Torrance, far away in Los Angeles County. At the hospital, Michael had convinced Gob to stop using Franklin in his act, and to put him into storage. (Michael never knew that Gob did occasionally get Franklin out of storage and meet with Nellie the whore over the years.)

Gob answered, "I know, but we won't use him in my magic act. People would recognize him from our CD and that TV show we did." He and Franklin had been on the courtoom show iMock Trial with J. Reinhold/i for a little while before getting fired. "But we can still be friends, and hang out."

Michael said, "Gob, he's not-"

Gob said, "Michael don't worry! Franklin wouldn't tell anybody else about us. He can keep a secret." Franklin never told anyone about being a pimp, or about Gob's love for Michael over the years. "Besides, he already overheard us having sex twice, and he didn't even interrupt us, let alone tattle."

"He heard us-?" But then Michael realized what Gob meant. That Franklin had been on the yacht and in the hotel room. "I didn't know that he was-" Damn, he was talking like Franklin was a person again.

With a sigh, Michael pulled the car over in a secluded spot again, and he shut off the engine. He turned and tried to talk to Gob seriously. "Gob, Franklin's not real. He's not alive."

Gob pouted. "Why are you being so mean? Is it because he's black?" Was Michael secretly a racist after all? "After all the lecturing you and Tracey did about how I'm bad for George Michael." In the 1990s, Gob had brought Franklin over to perform for George Michael's birthday party once. "Judging me all the time, and telling me not to bring Franklin."

Michael felt guilty and said, "I'm sorry I didn't let you come over more." Back then, he had tried to make Tracey see that Gob wasn't so bad; he didn't know any better because of Mom and Dad. Plus there were racist people at the country club and at the annual Cinco de Cuatro party too, making Gob think that Michael was overreacting and being too politically correct. "He's like an overgrown kid, really. Like Buster."

Tracey said with a sigh, "Yeah, clearly. He thinks Franklin is real." So Tracey agreed to let Gob visit, but not with Franklin anymore. "I don't want George Michael to repeat any of his racist jokes. I mean, we're not going to Cinco de Cuatro for a reason." Lucille had been offended when Michael stopped going to the holiday that she invented, but Michael had to put his foot down somewhere. He told his mother that there was bound to be blowback someday from the Hispanic community.

But Gob still kept being offensive even without Franklin, and he was rude to Tracey just like the rest of the Bluth family. Then there was Gob's drug use and his frequent partying with girls on Spring Break, and she got fed up, so gradually Michael stopped letting Gob come by the house. He did still see Gob at the Bluth Company or family gatherings without Tracey. (Tracey often went to visit her own family for a break from the Bluths.) So there was no total estrangement with Gob, like Michael had with Lindsay in 2002. Still, Michael had kept his distance and he became more judgmental over the years.

Gob remembered the 1990s, and he said quietly, "I guess it was for the best, 'cause I was jealous of you and Tracey. I tried to keep it a secret and get over you by dating other guys."

"You did?" Michael asked, becoming curious about Gob's sexual history.

Gob confessed, "Yeah, at first I just had a threesome with a guy and a girl from Lindsay's wedding. Hippies, you know. They were into it." Actually it had been somewhat awkward, due to Gob's inexperience and nervousness. "I never saw them again, 'cause I didn't want Lindsay to find out or tell Tobias. But I learned that I was bisexual for sure, and I thought maybe I could pretend some other guy was you. So I started seeing some guys, hoping I could find somebody that would make me forget you and stop being jealous." It didn't ever work, though. There was no love like Michael's love. It was why he chose that Bryan Adams song for the CD. He ached to have Michael love him and respect him.

Michael was glad to know that some of Gob's gay experience was not purely for money; Gob didn't get arrested until late 2000, and Michael had misunderstood what "following people to their cars for money" meant. He had been distracted about Tracey's coma, and he thought Gob was dealing drugs instead. Michael sighed with regret about his blindness. Many times during the 1990s, he had obliviously ignored many accidental slips about Gob's sexuality and his incestuous love. Michael had been in denial and blocked them out in a way that he never blocked out Buster's creepy love for Mom.

"I'm so sorry, Gob." He shouldn't have been so distant and rude to his brother. But Dad and the Boyfights made him try to act superior and lord it over Gob that he was Manager of the Bluth Company, not Gob. "This is why you couldn't ever settle down with someone? I should have seen-"

Gob shook his head. "You couldn't help it, Michael. You only loved Tracey then." Gob knew that Michael's morals were stricter than Dad's about cheating, and Gob didn't want to disappoint Michael. He looked somewhat uncomfortable and said, "Let's not talk about it anymore."

Michael hugged him, though, and whispered, "I love you."

"I love you." Still Gob tried not to cry and be girly. He pulled away, saying that Michael would smush the cake.

Michael asked him, "Did you ever talk to anybody about this? Like Nellie?"

Gob said, "Yeah sometimes she would listen to me, and then I'd feel better. I talked to Franklin too, and he said he was still my friend." Nellie wasn't really a friend, since after all she was just a hooker and frequently got bored with Gob's crying.

Michael frowned and worried again. "Gob, Franklin's not-"

"Michael, stop it!" Gob didn't want to hear this.

Michael touched Gob's face tenderly. "He's a puppet."

Gob insisted, "He's my real friend, Michael. He said he still liked me, even after we lost all the money. Even after I got kicked out of the Magician's Alliance."

Michael realized that Gob did actually notice that all the shallow friends he had in high school were gone. Some of it was due to him disappearing suddenly when Eve Holt got pregnant, but when Gob came back home to Newport Beach, most of the guys he hung out with had moved on. Gob never went to college and his faltering magic career had started to look desperate and uncool. Plus he got rid of his cars finally and got a Segway, which was off-putting. Then the Bluths lost everything, and even the Magician's Alliance didn't respect him anymore.

"Gob, I'm your friend. You know that, don't you? You don't need Franklin now. You have me."

Gob protested that Michael wasn't living with him, and he had to deal with Steve Holt all the time and lie to the family. Franklin was the only person he could talk to about that. "Don't you like Franklin? Come on, you let him testify at the mock trial."

Michael remembered saying, "I support my brother!" and tossing the puppet to Gob on his way to the witness stand. He also recalled the fact that Wayne Jarvis and other people also sometimes acted like Franklin was alive as well, so Gob's delusion was hardly unique. Also, George Sr. went stir-crazy while living in the attic and he talked to Lindsay's dolls like they were alive, too. Maybe Gob's belief in the puppet wasn't so bad after all, and Michael needed to be more supportive.

"Yeah, I did," he admitted.

Gob said, "And he was a big hero, and you won the mock trial. So you owe him. Be nice."

Michael sighed and gave in, apologizing for "being mean."

Gob felt better and said smugly, "You're just jealous of me having another friend, 'cause you don't have any other friends."

Indeed, Michael had lost the friends he made in college because he became so busy with his marriage, raising George Michael, and trying to finish his degree and go to law school. All the while, he worked at the Bluth Company, and Dad forced him to drop out of law school after only a year. Michael hardly ever had time to relax and have fun, though Tracey tried to help him over the years. She was the one he could talk to about his frustrations, though Michael could never build up the courage to quit the company and leave for good, despite all his threats to run away.

Michael said, "Fine. Yeah. I'm sorry for being jealous."

"Good. And I won't tell Franklin what you said."

Michael still worried, but decided not to protest Franklin anymore, to let Gob keep the puppet for now. Gob was starved for love and acceptance. Perhaps he did still need Franklin to comfort him whenever Dad put him down and Michael wasn't around. "But let's not keep having sex in front of Franklin. That's weird."

Gob smiled and agreed. "Okay, we'll put him in the bathroom tonight. He can watch the doves and make sure they don't escape again."

"All right." Michael started the car again and drove back to the hotel.

Relieved to change the subject, Gob chatted about the birthday party and all the fun things that he'd do with Tony Wonder soon.

Michael didn't protest again that Gob shouldn't break him out of prison. He was too busy brooding about Gob's psychological damage.

Maybe if Gob became good friends with Tony Wonder, it would help his self-esteem and his sanity. Gob could make up with the rest of the Magician's Alliance and realize that he had many friends who cared about him. Maybe then Gob would feel less lonely and not need Franklin. Michael hoped that Gob would get well enough by the time they left for Cabo, that he might agree to leave Franklin behind, or put him into storage again. Michael could argue that the puppet would be too recognizable and reveal their identity to strangers.

If Gob let go of the puppet at last, then they would be happy in Cabo and love each other. Michael would take care of Gob and treat him like he deserved.

When they arrived at the hotel, Michael parked the car and got out. Gob changed seats and handed Michael the thing of cake to take to the doves. Gob was going to leave, drive around a bit, and hide the car somewhere else. Then he would sneak into the hotel later and spend the night.

So Michael went up to his room, and he fed the cake to the birds in their cage. Then he moved them and Franklin to the bathroom. He looked at Franklin a moment, then shut the door.

He went to undress and wait for Gob in bed. While alone, he brooded some more.

Michael realized now why he was in denial about Rita for so long. It wasn't just because he was a self-absorbed narcissist. It wasn't just her British accent that fooled him for all those weeks that they went on what turned out to be play dates. It was Rita's sweetness and innocence, her occasionally vacant expression, and her disarming way of getting Michael to relax and ditch work. Rita had been so carefree, loving to just roll down a hill in Sudden Valley or laugh wildly at the Poppins doll that kept knocking Michael over. She reminded him of Gob's child-like love of fun and magic. Even his belief in Franklin. Dating Rita was Michael's way of lying to himself, that he didn't want Gob, that he could find somebody else like his brother.

Recently, while bored in his hotel, Michael had watched a movie on TV called iPumpkin/i, starring Christina Ricci. It was a subversive comedy about a sorority girl who fell in love with a mentally challenged guy named Pumpkin, whom she volunteered with for charity. Michael had watched the film while remembering his time with Rita and feeling embarrassed. The movie was a satirical look at political correctness and prejudices. Many of the characters were hypocrites who claimed to support Pumpkin, only to forget him casually, even Carolyn, Christina Ricci's character. When they grew closer, everyone ostracized Carolyn and accused her of raping Pumpkin, and having unnatural desires. The school counselor said that the love was only a romantic fantasy arising from her sympathetic compassion for Pumpkin. Even when people became more accepting of the couple, they remained uncomfortable with watching Carolyn kiss Pumpkin. It was black comedy, complete with bad poetry, a suicide attempt and a fiery car crash.

But Carolyn said that Pumpkin had a beautiful soul, because he knew pain. "Only those who suffer can grow into beauty."

Michael knew that Gob had suffered plenty. He'd watched for years as their parents fucked him up and denied him any love, making him needy and desperate for approval. Between the Boyfights and the traumatic lessons with the one-armed man, it was a wonder that Gob survived with any self-esteem at all. Perhaps he overcompensated with his arrogant confidence, and the family's wealth had insulated Gob from the real, normal world. Despite all his problems, Michael thought that Gob had a beautiful soul.

Thankfully, Gob was not actually like Pumpkin in the movie (and even Pumpkin protested that he wasn't "special"). Gob was more crazy than stupid. Gob had flashes of brilliance sometimes, like when he figured out that Mom framed Michael for a car accident. Some of his magic tricks had even worked, like the walk on water illusion and the Free Chicken outside the courthouse. Gob could be rational sometimes, and he seemed better since they got together, with the exception of Franklin.

Heck, iForrest Gump/i had featured a relationship between a man with an I.Q. of 75 and a troubled woman named Jenny, with a brief life. Despite his mental impairment, Forrest insisted that he knew what love was, and eventually they married and had a son before Jenny died. That was treated as a legitimate romance in a perfectly mainstream movie.

Gob wasn't nearly as impaired as Forrest Gump, either, so why was it wrong to love him back? In Michael's opinion, Gob was pure and good underneath his bravado. He was just in a state of arrested development, still clinging to comforting kid stuff like magic and Franklin. Michael believed that all the bad things about Gob were not really his fault, that he learned racism and sexism from their parents. Gob never grew beyond from his glory days in high school, when he was wildly popular and won a class election using Dad's dirty tricks. Dad had even somewhat approved of Gob then for seducing girls with his "car trouble?" routine, though he got annoyed when Gob got them pregnant. But Lindsay was constantly getting pregnant too, and Dad got her abortions. Similarly, when Gob had accidents, Dad just paid off the girls, until Eve Holt refused to have an abortion. So Dad sent Gob out of town to escape any possibility of a paternity test, that could result in having to pay child support. It was no wonder that Gob had a twisted set of sexual morals, and didn't understand love.

But could Gob learn what real love was? He seemed capable, when he was with Michael. Their intimacy didn't feel twisted and wrong; it felt like love, and Michael did not want to pretend any more that he only felt compassion and sympathy. He loved Gob too, and wanted to make up for all the pain Gob had suffered. He wanted to fix him and heal him.